Celebritywit

Don't Expect a Hungry Man to Make Sense

Man to woman: The name "Pizza Hut" is so perfect, because it has "pizza" in the name, and they sell pizza!

Busch Gardens
Tampa, Florida


Overheard by: Faye


Categories: Florida | Food | Guys | Names | Stupidity | Women | Posted 2010-08-16 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Yeah. I Guess.

Guy: Men are bastards. I'm a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?

Norman, Oklahoma


Categories: Dancing | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Insults | Offers and requests | Oklahoma | Posted 2010-08-16 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

...Assuming I've Successfully Turned You Gay. Now Let's Go Look at Window-treatments.

Little boy on bus: Mom, mom, what's that? (points at Showgirls)
Mom: It's a titty place! Don't worry, no one's going to come out naked, but you won't care about that when you're 20.

Seattle, Washington

Overheard by: Face


Categories: Age and ageing | Kids | Kids | Moms | Parenting | Questions | Rack | Sensory experiences | Sex | Washington | Posted 2010-08-16 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Threesome-Resistant Boys Are Sadly Common in Oregon

Whiny girl to female friend, showing a polka-dotted bra: Come on! I'm trying to show you my boobs!
Boy, lifting his shirt: The only boobs she wants to see are mine!

Eugene, Oregon


Categories: Friends | Girls | Guys | Oregon | Rack | Undies | Wishes | Posted 2010-08-15 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

What a World

Little boy: My legs are melting! My legs are melting!

Target
White Plains, New York


Categories: Body parts | Kids | Kids | New York | Sensory experiences | Stores | Posted 2010-08-15 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

This Conversation's the Libretto for an Entire Italian Opera

Girl #1: It's too hot.
Girl #2: Did you say it's hot?
Girl #1: I said it's too hot.
Girl #2: For pizza?
Girl #1: For everything. For life.

Venice
Italy


Overheard by: Chris


Categories: Food | Girls | Italy | Questions | Weather | Posted 2010-08-15 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

You're Too Kind, Madame

Little girl, in Arabic, as she sits in the train: Smells like cotton candy!
Mother, in French: Yeah, you're right, it smells like cotton candy. (to grandmother) Don't you think it smells like cotton candy?
Young black woman, sitting in the next row, smiling: It's me. It's my perfume.
Mother: Really?! What is it?
Young black woman: Vanilla and cotton candy.
Mother: Really? My girl told me it smells like the amusement park. At first I thought it was the cleaning product they used to wash the train floor. (pause) It smells really good.

C Train
Paris
France


Overheard by: BBM Tm

Bad Things Happen When Housemates Mate

Guy to crowd of housemates: See, this is the kind of toilet we want--it's rated to be able to flush one kilo of material at a time.
Girl: How many kilos does a newborn weigh?

Home Depot
Oakland, California


Overheard by: Alchemist George


Categories: Abortion | California | Diet & weight | Friends | Girls | Guys | Kids | Pregnancy | Questions | Stores | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2010-08-14 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Still Say You'd Never Date a Jersey Girl?

Girl: I'm gonna miss smoking.
Guy: We both will. Oh, well...
Girl: I'll just replace it by giving you blowjobs all the time.
Guy: Yeah, we can't do that in public.
Girl: We can carry around a tent. Or I can carry around a parasol, and if anyone asks I can say I'm under my property and they're trespassing.

New Jersey


Categories: BJs | Girls | Guys | Smoking | Posted 2010-08-14 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

They Call Him "The Baconator"!

Twelve-year-old boy in lunch line: So I think I have a new arch-nemesis... He's like, Canadian, or something.
Friend: Cool!

Brown University
Providence, Rhode Island

Let's Hope She's Kidding

Guy to girl: So, do you call him "camp" for short?
Girl dead seriously: No, I call him master. He is my boyfriend, you know.

English Class
Tampa, Florida


Categories: Class | Florida | Girls | Guys | Names | Questions | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2010-08-14 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

...Prematurely

Overweight mom, walking away from grave, to young sons: If you don't start behaving, you are going to be buried here.

Arlington National Cemetery
Arlington, Virginia


Categories: Death & dying | Fat people | Kids | Moms | Parenting | Threats | Virginia | Posted 2010-08-13 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook