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Denzel Only Works on Tuesdays, People.
Train operator: The middle door of the third car of this train will not take you to a magical fantasy land where you meet Denzel Washington. It will merely take you to Grovesnor, like every other door on this train.
dcist.com
...Senator.
Young scruffy guy, shouting at grey-haired guy walking nervously away: I sucked your dick! Give me my five dollars!
The Mission
San Francisco, California
Friends Don't Let Friends Tutor Drunk
Girl #1: I need you to help me with my English homework.
Girl #2: Alright, what do you need help with?
Girl #1: I still can't understand how you tell adjectives from adverbs.
Girl #2: Adverbs end in -ly, like "quickly," "quietly," and "quantity."
University of Wisconsin
I Won't Go to the U.S., and That's Final
Redheaded woman, firmly: No, I don't mind scummy, I don't mind stabby, but I am not living somewhere that's famous for racial assaults and acid attacks.
Despondent man: I'm just asking you to think about it.
Marylebone Station
London
England
Overheard by: Bleepette
...Which Explains All the "Caterpillars" Chained to the Radiator in My Basement
High school philosophy teacher: So slavery is like the caterpillar to freedom's butterfly!
Lake Tahoe, Calirfornia
We'll Never Understand Hippie Porn
Hipster to another: It's so funny because the yurt is so small!
Ithaca, New York
Overheard by: Cree
When I Ordered a Necrophiliac Turkey
Woman, cooking: Somehow, they've turned this into a bondage chicken.
Australia
Overheard by: I Just Got A Really Strange Image
What With the Euro and So On
Girl #1: Where are you from?
Irish exchange student: I'm from Ireland.
Girl #2: Oh my gosh! Do they have years over there?
University of Florida
Poor Jay Leno.
Guy: What do you want me to do, put my head on a diet?
Frankfort, Illinois
Overheard by: Lissa
What? These Are Slate.
Girl wearing gray boots on cell: It is a cute dress and it would be even cuter if I had gray boots to wear with it.
Macy's
Birmingham, Alabama
Like a Virgil, Touched for the Very First Time...
Roman history professor: Wow, I'm really doing bad, bad things to Virgil right now.
University
Newfoundland
Canadia
Overheard by: Mel
Don't They Prefer Nuts?
Loud hipster girl: Listen to me. A squirrel could legit run up and bite your vagina.
London
Canadia
