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You're Just in Time to See the Internet Made Illegible

Soldier: What is that thing?
Passenger #1: An iPhone.
Passenger #2: Man, where the hell have you been?
Soldier: Iraq.

Flight from Minneapolis to Pittsburgh


Categories: Airports & flights | Cell phones | Default | Geography | Military | Questions | Strangers | USA | Posted 2008-06-29 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Really? Now All I Have to Do Is Master Shot Callin' and I Can Die Happy!

Teen cashier at checkout: Are you listening to music on an iPod?
Geriatric customer: It's an iPhone.
Teen cashier: Dude, you're ballin'.

Columbus, Indiana

Overheard by: Hoosier

Anybody Seen Baryshnikov Lately?

Confused girl: Someone with an unknown number just called me twice. I, of course, ignored the calls. Then they left a voicemail of music from The Nutcracker...I have the feeling I'm about to be murdered.

Lexington, Kentucky


Categories: Cell phones | Fears | Feelings | Girls | Kentucky | Murder | Music | Threats | Posted 2008-04-23 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Sometimes I Add Light Slapping.

Man: Hey, asshole, get off the cellphone.
Dude: Excuse me...?
Man: The street car is a public space. Get off the cellphone or get off the street car!
Dude: No.
Man: Yes! I don't want to have to hear you yapping away--
Dude: --Why don't you get off, then, buddy?
Man: This is a public space! Stop polluting the space with your hot air!
Dude: No.
Man: Yes.
Dude: No! [Into cell] Oh, nothing, Bruce. Just some loser on the street car...
Man: Hey!
Dude: Yeah?
Man: You're fat and ugly, you know that?
Dude, leaving: Screw you!
Man, to entire street car: I do this every Sunday...

Toronto, Ontario
Canadia


Overheard by: damn hiatus


Categories: Assholes | Canadia | Cell phones | Gripes | Strangers | Posted 2008-02-16 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

In the Hamptons, That's a Marriage Proposal

Guy from inside Port-A-Potty: Oh, shit, I just dropped my BlackBerry in there!
Friend: Oh, man, what are you gonna do?!
Guy: Well, somebody's got to stick their hand in there!
Dude waiting in line: I think I'll use the other one. I don't want to be the first person to piss on your BlackBerry.

Rock the Farm Benefit
East Hampton, New York


Categories: Cell phones | Friends | Guys | New York | Pee | Poop | Posted 2008-02-01 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

All My Gentleman Callers Are Dead

Loud old lady on cell: Hello! Sorry about before. I was so shocked someone called me that I pressed the wrong button!

Belgrave Line train
Melbourne
Australia


Overheard by: Kiri


Categories: Australia | Cell phones | Old folks | Posted 2008-01-21 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Now You Can Watch Videos While It Drops Your Calls

Chick: So, what's so special about this phone other than making millions of people shit their pants simultaneously?
Guy: It hasn't got any buttons, or some-such. It can tell who you want to call by reading your mind. Also, it smells like flowers and tastes like bacon. Which is handy, since it can regrow its own skin. And fly.
Chick: Well, I'll be.

Scottsdale, Arizona

Overheard by: I did NOT shit my pants.


Categories: Arizona | Cell phones | Friends | Posted 2007-10-02 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Why Americans Are Fat: Encapsulated

Wasted guy #1: Let me see your phone.
Wasted guy #2: Why?
Wasted guy #1: I need to call my cell.
Wasted guy #2: Why?
Wasted guy #1: To see if it's in my pocket.

Dallas, Texas

Overheard by: Tswerve


Categories: Cell phones | Drunks | Texas | Posted 2007-09-09 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Did You Buy the Catastrophic Event Warranty?

Woman: Excuse me, my phone doesn't work. What should I do?
Salesman: What happened to your phone?
Woman: Well, my two year old son poured chocolate syrup on it, so I soaked it in the sink with dish soap to get it off.

Shout-out: overheardinlakecounty.blogspot.com


Categories: Cell phones | Gadgets | Moms | Parents | Technology | Posted 2007-06-21 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook