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Too Damn Many Rude Honkies in This World
White guy with dreadlocks: I don't even know how many penises and swastikas are drawn on him. It's ridiculous! (walks by a parked pickup truck, reaches in the window, and honks the horn) Horn works!
Owner of the truck: What the hell?
Arizona State University
Overheard by: Felicity
Exactly.
20-something girlfriend, pointing at "exit only--do not enter" sign: I should tattoo that on my butt.
20-something boyfriend: But then you would be single.
Lincoln Park
Chicago, Illinois
Where Was It Again?
Woman in next dressing room: Oh my god, I always forget about my tattoo!
The Gap
Ridgewood, New Jersey
Categories: Fashion | New Jersey | Tattoos | Women | Posted 2009-09-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wow. Suddenly I Loathe Myself.
Client: So, how will we work it out if I want a custom tattoo designed?
Tattoo artist: Have you ever been shopping with your girlfriend where you just sort of follow her around for a while and point stuff out until you figure out what she wants?
Client: Yeah...
Tattoo artist: It's just like that, except you're the girlfriend.
Americana Tattoo Parlor
Augusta, Georgia
Overheard by: Clarissa St. Tacocrotch
...Then I'll Have Everything Checked Off My Bucket List.
Wine girl #1: We should go get tattoos!
Wine girl #2: We totally should, I'll be divorced by morning!
Open Mic Night
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: only if it's my name on her ass
Categories: Advice | Bars & Clubs | Default | Girls | Illinois | Relationships | Tattoos | Posted 2009-06-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But All You Really Need Is Some Concealer and a Dream
Girl #1: So when is that thing you guys are doing?
Girl #2: Oh my god! You have to go! We're all going to get naked and walk around campus all day.
Girl #1: I honestly would, but I have tattoos in some really unconventional places.
Girl #2: Oh, I understand totally.
Chem Lab, William and Mary
Williamsburg, Virginia
Categories: Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Default | Girls | Offers and requests | Questions | Tattoos | Virginia | Posted 2009-05-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
This From a Girl with an "Enter Here -->" Tattoo?
Girl #1: Did you hear John* is thinking about getting a new tattoo?
Girl #2: Yeah? What's it gonna be?
Girl #1: He wants to get a kangaroo wearing gumboots, with a shovel over its shoulder. How classy is that?
Sydney
Australia
So Anyway, Welcome to Cougar Lit 101
Female English professor on the first day of class: So tell me as much about me as you can by my appearance. What kind of person do you think I am?
Student: I think you were probably a wild teenager. You've got a tattoo and a tongue piercing.
Female English professor (chuckling): I've got more tattoos and piercings than you care to know about.
Community College
Elizabethtown, Kentucky
Overheard by: Chelsea
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Kentucky | Offers and requests | Questions | Students | Stupidity | Tattoos | Teachers | Posted 2008-12-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Looked Like He Might Be Manorexic
Teen girl on cell: I saw this guy with a man tramp stamp... A mamp stamp.
Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: sadie
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | On the phone | Tattoos | Teens | Train | Words | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Brand Recognition Is So Important
Girl: In case they forget our names, they're right here on our vaginas.
1280 Peachtree Street
Atlanta, Georgia
Clap If You Believe She'll Regret This
Female student #1: What does your tattoo mean?
Female student #2: Courage.
Female student #1: I want to get a tattoo!
Female student #2: What do you want to get?
Female student #1: Across my back I want a fairy... wearing lingerie.
Female student #2: Oh... Okay... That would be nice...
Houston Community College
Houston, Texas
Wait, an Outline, or Solid Shaded?
Girl: I bet he would.
Friend: No, he wouldn't.
Girl: I'll call him now. [Dials] Hey, honey. Quick question: if I had a tattoo of a dick on the inside of my thigh about half an inch away from my pussy, would you lick it? [Pause] No. I said 'if'... Well, no, I'm not saying it's totally out of the question... Fine. We'll talk about it when I get home. [To friend] See? I told you he would!
Bus stop
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Dana
Also, "Make All Deliveries in Rear"
Guy: You're such a slut.
Chick: That's what my tattoo says!
Shout-out: overheardlines.blogspot.com
Overheard by: tim
Categories: Hoochies | Insults | Overheard Lines | Tattoos | Posted 2007-06-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Mean, the Only Other Possibility Is That You're a Poseur Idiot
Dude: I thought you could use chopsticks.
Chick: Why?
Dude: Because you have tattoos.
Chick: And that means I can use chopsticks?
Dude: Well, one of them is Chinese...
Noodle Man, Ryrie Street
Geelong
Australia
Overheard by: Does the septum ring make her part animal?
But You Can Hold It Over the Kid for Life
Pregnant, tattooed hipster: This is killing me. How can I go without ink for nine months?
Tattooed hipster friend: Oh, I know.
Nevada
