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According to This Late-breaking Report from Fox News
Professor: Obama is a white supremacist just like all of you and me and everyone else.
University of Colorado
Overheard by: I missed something
...I Don't Care If Your Hand Is Stuck in a Mayonnaise Jar!
Jamaican father to crying son: Stop make a big-ass scene like some white boy!
Montreal
Canadia
Every Spanish-Language Soap Opera, in a Nutshell.
Girl in next aisle: Spanish doctor, pregnant nurse! Oh, snap!
Barnes & Noble
Plymouth Meeting, Pennsylvania
Categories: Feelings | Girls | Pennsylvania | Pregnancy | Race | Relationships | Posted 2011-06-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So None Of That Unpleasantness Was Personal?
30-something artist: It's not that everybody hated the Jews, it's that the Catholics were crazy.
Art Studio
Rochester, New York
Dear World-- We Apologize.
American tourist #1: What's your background?
Tourist guide: Aboriginal.
American tourist #1: No, as in "where were you born?"
Tourist guide: Here, in Australia.
American tourist #1: But you're black!
Tourist guide: Yes... I'm aboriginal.
American tourist #1: But I thought you guys were all extinct! Are you, like, the last one?
American tourist #2: Jay, shut up. It's idiots like you that make us look stupid. He's messing with you, there are no aboriginals.
Adelaide, Australia
It's a Small Mind After All
Teenage girl to mother in annoyed tone: Everything in here is too Asian.
Japan Pavilion Shop
Epcot, Walt Disney World
Florida
Overheard by: I'm living in a world I do not understand
I Don't Like Feeling Exotic
Little girl to mother: I always get weirded out when we come to Asian markets.
Mom: Why is that?
Little girl: Because there are so many Asian people in one place!
Mom: Why is that weird?
Uwajimaya
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Koley
Is a Prejudice Bad Even When It's Good? Discuss.
Former roommate: Arabs smell good... No, I don't talk to stinky Arabs. All my Arab friends smell fantastic.
Bloomington, Indiana
Overheard by: Rachel S.
Categories: Guys | Indiana | Race | Sensory experiences | Weirdness | Posted 2011-03-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
First Time in Massachusetts, Sweetie?
Black girl, after seeing renaissance a cappella group rehearsing: White people be doing the most ridiculous things! No offense...
Williams College
Williamstown, Massachusetts
Overheard by: None taken
Categories: Black people | Girls | Massachusetts | Music | Race | Weirdness | Posted 2011-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Actually, I Think He Went to Columbia University
Girl #1: One time, this Colombian dude was hitting on me...
Girl #2, interrupting: What? Like from Columbia, Missouri?
Girl #1: No. This country--he was like Arab or something.
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: A.
Female Blacknerds Can Afford to Be Picky in Choosing a Mate
Hot, black female nerd on phone: No, I don't need you to explain to me why Batman can't be Asian. That's a conversation we only need to have once.
Connecticut
Overheard by: Bruce Lee Wayne
Categories: About celebrities | Black people | Connecticut | On the phone | Race | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2010-12-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How Come My School's "Culture Day" Is Never That Exciting?
Teen #1: So he's running around with his dick like slapping his abs and he goes "what time you wanna come over?"
Teen #2: His Puerto Rican dick?
Teen #1: Yeah!
Teen #2, sighing dreamily: Oh yeahhhhh.
Flinder's Street Station
Melbourne
Australia
...No Offense If Your Parents Are in Prison, Keisha.
Feminist student, about discussion: No, this is completely wrong! We shouldn't be congratulating men for not having affairs!
Teacher: Yes, that's exactly right! I mean, it's like when we congratulate black people for staying out of prison!
(stunned silence)
Kendrick School
Columbus, Georgia
Overheard by: MJH
Translation: That's Lazy Screenwriting
Student: This morning I watched Walker, Texas Ranger. They're always going around talking to Native Americans.
Professor: That's good.
Decorah, Iowa
Are You in the Dark About Gay Sexual Slang, Dear Readers?
Gay husband to his husband: It's these Mexican circumstances. Everyone knows when you pass go, you collect $200.
Fairfax, Virginia
Also Why She Doesn't Have to Give Blowjobs.
Confused attractive hipster: I don't understand why he became progressively more Asian during my dream.
Amused friend #1: You don't have to.
Amused friend #2: Because you're pretty.
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | Compliments | New York | Race | Posted 2010-10-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Too Damn Many Rude Honkies in This World
White guy with dreadlocks: I don't even know how many penises and swastikas are drawn on him. It's ridiculous! (walks by a parked pickup truck, reaches in the window, and honks the horn) Horn works!
Owner of the truck: What the hell?
Arizona State University
Overheard by: Felicity
Said I Hated Black People Enough for Both Of Us
Black guy to white girl: I hate black people!
White girl: You hate yourself?
Black guy: No. I just hate black people. They're always late. And they tell me to wear my pants down. I made friends with a white supremacist.
White girl: But they hate you!
Black guy: He liked me...
Norman, Oklahoma
Have You Ever Felt the Stinging Shame Of a Violin Bow on Your Behind?
High school girl #1: I hate how everyone judges you based on your grades.
High school girl #2: What?
High school girl #3: Well, okay. By "everyone," I mean Asians.
Walter Johnson High School
Maryland
Vlad Has Always Had a Dark Sense Of Humor.
White Russian guy with slight accent: Something tells me my first born won't be white. That something is my penis.
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: The Sauce
...In 3...2...1...
Girl: There will be a beautiful rainbow of racial harmony coming out of my vagina.
Aurora, Colorado
Always Making Generalizations About Particular Groups
College chick: Oh my god! Girls are, like, so racist.
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Jackie
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Gender issues | Race | Sorority types | Washington | Posted 2010-09-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or More Accurately, Not Having Sex With White Girls
White student #1: Yeah, it's a good thing I'm not going to that preppy high school anymore.
White student #2: Yeah, I agree.
White student #3: You'd probably still be having sex with white girls.
Deerfield Beach High School
Florida
Also Why Children Love the Berenstein Bears
Teen girl to teen friends: I wish I was mixed race--not really black. I mean, you're brown all year round.
Nottingham
England
Overheard by: Johnny
Cooool...
Clueless dude on tiny bike: So... What are you?
Cute racially ambiguous girl: What am I? Like what race am I?
Dude: Uh, yeah.
Girl: What kind of question is that?! Is that how you talk to girls? I'm an alien, okay? I'm from Mars!
Boston, Massachusetts
Then Maya Angelou Bitch-Slapped That Opinion Out Of Me
Woman #1: So how did the date go?
Woman #2: Well, he started telling me about his favorite books, and I was all: "you know niggas can't read!"
Georgia
What Are You Doing in Community College?
Black guy: Hey! What country you from?
Asian girl: Um... America?
Black guy: You look Chinese.
Asian girl: I am?
Community College
Godfrey, Illinois
Overheard by: M
Categories: Asians | Black people | Colleges & Universities | Illinois | Questions | Race | Posted 2010-06-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
See? You're Obviously a New Yorker!
Nigerian guy, joking: Ha ha! Yeah, it's probably because I am black, hey.
American girl: Oh my god, you can't say that! You have to say "African-American."
Nigerian guy: But I'm not African-American; I'm Nigerian. I suppose you could say "African"?
American girl: No, look, we learned it in elementary school! It's "African-American"!
Nigerian guy: Okay... So you're Scandinavian, by that rationale.
American girl: No, I'm American! You're African-American!
English guy: Please shut the fuck up.
Cambridge
England
Overheard by: TopCat
...According to This Hallmark Card.
Woman #1: Look at that rainbow outside!! It's huge!
Woman #2: I know! It's like when you see a black dick for the first time.
Turlock, California
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Penis | Race | Weather | Women | Posted 2010-06-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And When Did "Baby Got Back" Become a Wedding Song?
Black 20-something guy to friend: Sir Mix-a-Lot killed more black people in the 90s than heart disease and Aids combined.
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: I know his pain
Categories: Arizona | Black people | Compare and contrast | Friends | Maladies | Murder | Race | Posted 2010-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Here, I'm Using Sarcasm to Make a Teaching Point
Political science professor: Our president is black. Some of you may have noticed this. Some of you probably haven't yet.
California State University
San Marcos, California
Overheard by: I knew it
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Politics | Race | Stupidity | Teachers | Posted 2010-05-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Weight Watcher Points Aren't Even Close
Spanish girl to boy: Sleeping with ten niggas ain't the same thing as sleeping with ten white boys!
High School
Pennsylvania
Categories: Compare and contrast | Foreigners | Pennsylvania | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sex | Posted 2010-05-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks, European Colonialism!
Ditzy 13-year-old brunette: That's so cool! She's French and (whispers) black. I didn't know you could get those!
Woldingham Sacred Heart School
England
Overheard by: on the floor laughing
Categories: England | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Tweens | Posted 2010-04-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Need To-- Ever Seen a White Baby?
Asian kid: We don't do a lot of jumping around.
Black kid: Except in the wars, when Chuck Norris has lots of babies.
Asian kid: And white people are marrying everyone.
Babson College
Wellesley, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Bruce
Categories: About celebrities | Asians | Black people | Colleges & Universities | Massachusetts | Race | Weirdness | Posted 2010-04-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Suppose He'll Object to Playing with a White Ball?
Skinny Asian kid buying 24-pack of Keystone Light, to friend: I dunno man. I've never played beer pong against a black dude before.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Ian
Categories: Asians | Drinking & drunks | Games | Overheard in Minneapolis | Race | Violence | Posted 2010-04-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Remember When Ted Danson Tried That at Whoopi's Roast?
Guy #1: Dude, you really need to end your obsession with black face, it's offensive.
Guy #2: Hell no, I'm bringing it back!
Fullerton, California
Categories: California | Guys | Race | Stupidity | Posted 2010-04-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We're So Vanilla We've Given Each Other Diabetes
Tall, pale, blonde girl: And Joe and I realized that we are both ridiculously tall, blonde and blue-eyed. So Aryan. We're basically Hitler's wet dream.
Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Celessa
It's a Conclusion I've Come to After Many Years Of Self-Reflection
Guy to girl: I hate Asian people named Christine.
Drew University
New Jersey
Overheard by: Greg Everitt
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Guys | Names | New Jersey | Race | Weirdness | Posted 2010-03-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With the Paper Bag on His Head?
Girl to friend: What if I am pregnant? How will I know who the father is? Well, if it comes out half Asian it's Jason's. If it comes out a midget it's Thomas's, and if it comes out blurry, it's the unnamed guy.
Escondido, California
Overheard by: Brit-ta-nee
Weirdest Episode Of Sesame Street *Ever*
30-something black man on cell: I don't know if I'll finish in time, but I think I can still make it work.
20-something black guy walking past: It's "ain't". As in "I ain't gonna get this shit done, so fuck all y'all!" Damn! You talkin' like a fool, brotha. (shakes head)
Savannah, Georgia
Categories: Black people | Education | Georgia | On the phone | Race | Words | Posted 2010-03-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Good to See Michigan Living Up to Its Reputation
Dorm guy: I said "thanks for the help," but I should have said, "thanks for the help, asshole, I hope they send you back to China."
Michigan State University
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Guys | Insults | Michigan | Race | Posted 2010-03-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which, Ironically, Would Be a Good Title for a Country Song
Black girl to white friends: Black people want to be country, but we don't want to listen to the music.
Harvard Yard
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: meems
Categories: Black people | Colleges & Universities | Massachusetts | Music | Race | Posted 2010-03-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If Only There Were a Website That Printed Such Gems...
Guy: I think it's just every guy's fantasy to live with a giant black man and engage in tomfoolery.
Santa Clara University
California
Overheard by: Erin
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Guys | Race | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2010-02-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Always Thought a Zeppoli Was That Big Machine on Ice Rinks
Guy: Yeah, this woman over at the Sun-Times building used to make this focaccia bread for us, it was great. But she was Italian-American though, she didn't know, she didn't even know what a cannoli was!
Friend: What!?
Guy: Yeah! And, like, zeppoli, she didn't know what a zeppoli was either! And those are like the two big things, y'know?
Friend: Oh, man!
Guy: That's what happens! That's what happens when you mix up the blood!
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: SOB: Stale Off the Boat
Um, It's Not Messy-- It's Calligraphy.
Preppy white boy: You're both women, and you're Asian! How can you have messy handwriting??
Professor: Wait, did I really just hear that?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: The non-asian woman
Categories: Asians | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Indiana | Preppies | Questions | Race | Stupidity | Teachers | Whiteys | Posted 2010-01-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
B.D. Wong Discusses His Performance on Law & Order: SVU
Student to friend: I was going for Asian and it came out pedophile.
Otago University
New Zealand
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Friends | New Zealand | Race | Sex | Students | Weirdness | Posted 2009-12-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Sure Those Pointed Hoods Are Just for Style
Man handing out pamphlets to white women: You two don't look like you're racist!
Kenmore Square
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: anonymous
Clustered Around the Mayonnaise and Wonder Bread
Aunt: Jared*, put the toy back. We are going to go over to K-Mart, because they have a better selection.
Four-year-old: I don't want to go to K-Mart, auntie! There's too many white people over there!
Ocean City, Maryland
Overheard by: His (embarassed) Mother
...As the Terms Of the Game Go for the Black Guys Require.
Girl to friend, heading to bar: I'm going straight for the black guys!
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: StellaEllaOla
Categories: Canadia | Friends | Girls | Race | Relationships | Posted 2009-12-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which Is Sort Of Like Reparations...
Black woman, chuckling gleefully at bad financial news on tv: Oh, some white folks gon' kill themselves now!
Medical Office Waiting Room
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: Ashleigh
Categories: Black people | Death & dying | Doctor's office | Race | TV shows | Virginia | Women | Posted 2009-11-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's What You Said About the Guy Who Was Blowing You Yesterday
Policewoman: I seen you beggin'. You don't know that guy, but he gave you money.
Hobo: Sweetness, sweetness, listen. That's my brother.
Policewoman: You have a white brother?
Hobo: My brother in Christ.
Urbana, Illinois
Categories: Cops | Family ties | Hobos | Illinois | Jesus | Money | Panhandling | Questions | Race | Posted 2009-11-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sadly Wayne Brady Would Never Attain His Mother's Dream
White mother to white toddler son: You're going to be black by the time we leave!
Grand Sierra Resort Pool
Reno, Nevada
Which, Coincidentally, Is Also K-Mart's Primary Demographic
Woman loading mini van outside K-Mart: I hate mini vans, the only people that need mini vans are old people, white people, crackheads, and people who need 'em.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Rebecca
In the Sense That It's Propping Up My Coffee Table
DJ: And we'll be giving away a free DVD of diary of a mad black woman!
Drunk shirtless redneck, sincerely: Wooooooo! That's my movie! That's my movie!
Screen on the Green, Centennial Park
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Becca
Whiter? Is That Possible?
Girl: It's like Everybody Loves Raymond, but with white people.
Columbia, Maryland
Overheard by: Liz
Categories: Compare and contrast | Girls | Maryland | Race | TV shows | Posted 2009-11-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Who's Black and White and Back from the Dead All Over?
Black girl, holding up picture she drew of black Jesus: My hero is Jesus Christ.
White kid: Jesus isn't black.
Black girl: Yes, he is!
White kid: No, he's white!
Uncomfortable teacher: Now, now, let's just say Jesus is all colors!
Art Class, Middle School
Maryland
Categories: Black people | Education | Jesus | Maryland | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Students | Teachers | Whiteys | Posted 2009-11-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Also Sad, but for Different Reasons
Girl #1: It so sad that racism is still a problem in Canada.
Girl #2: I know what you mean, the other day my mother-in-law went to a variety store, and she, like, couldn't get served in English.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Sad York Student
Categories: Canadia | Family ties | Girls | Language barrier | Race | Shopping | Stupidity | Posted 2009-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like, I Notice You're Wearing a Nike Shirt...
50-something female to Native American presenter in elementary school: Is it true that the arrival of whites changed your way of life?
Denver, Colorado
Especially When You're Black.
Manager: Pants off is the new black.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: fool
Categories: Bosses | Clothes | Clothing | Overheard in PDX | Race | Posted 2009-10-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Happens When You Tell Them There Are No Stupid Questions
Girl to teacher, about Underground Railroad: Wait... didn't the white people hear the train go by?
High School
Clark, New Jersey
Overheard by: Sweeney
Categories: Education | New Jersey | Public Transportation | Questions | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Students | Teachers | Posted 2009-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Men Are Easily Distracted
Man: You know the black guy from Transformers? You know who I'm talking about?
Woman: Megan Fox?
Man: Yeah.
Holland, Michigan
Stop Being Black at the Store!
Mom to child yelling and running around: Quit it! You embarrassin' me in front of the white folk!
Memphis, Tennessee
Overheard by: A white folk
According to Their Publicists
Passerby to two women getting off elevator with a double stroller with white and black babies: Uh-oh!
Women: Oh, it's okay. They're just friends.
Elevator, Westchester Mall
White Plains, New York
Thanks, President Obama!
White hipster to others: I've noticed the black kids in Harlem are starting to wear skinny jeans and skateboard. It's great... 'cause it's, like, cool to be smart again.
Massachussetts
Reader Poll: Is This Racist?
Girl: Promise me you won't fall in love with a Mexican while you're gone and leave me forever.
Boy: You're so racist sometimes.
Girl: I can't help it!
International Airport
Portland, Oregon
That's Where the Naked Twister Game Is Taking Place
Teen boy #1: Haha, you have to be in the back of the bus.
Teen boy #2: Is that a race thing?
Teen boy #1: No, its a sexual thing.
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sara
Categories: Massachusetts | Public Transportation | Questions | Race | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-09-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Really Need Better Facebook Pictures
Girl: Can you poke the Mars Bars?
Guy: They don't feel white.
Girl: Do they feel brown?
Guy: Yep, they feel brown.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Like on That Episode Of Sliders
Woman on cell: Everyone's a Jew, except for the Jews!
Livonia, Michigan
Categories: Michigan | On the phone | Race | Stupidity | Women | Posted 2009-08-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like They Used to Do with Us!
Teenager, noticing little girl being led around by her mother on a leash: Look! White people be putting their kids on leashes!
The Galleria
St. Louis, Missouri
Ever Watch Any Of Bush's Speeches?
Four-year-old: Mommy, that girl speaks English!
Mother: Yes, she does.
Four-year-old: But nobody here speaks English. Does she really speak English?
Mother: Of course she speaks English! She's white!
Shout-out: overheardlines.blogspot.com
Overheard by: katie
Categories: Kids | Language barrier | Moms | Overheard Lines | Parenting | Race | Should have used a condom | Posted 2009-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Doesn't He Just Get That Swastika-Shaped Mole Removed?
Woman: Everyone's been asking me why I didn't bring my boyfriend!
Man: Why didn't you bring him? Too many Jews?
Woodstock, New York
Overheard by: Becca
Didn't They Try That Defense in a Law & Order Episode?
College guy #1: I think racism is just really bad OCD!
College guy #2: Haha, yeah!
University of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Mental illnesses | Pennsylvania | Race | Students | Posted 2009-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Your Shadow, Britney.
Translucently pale white girl staring at cop car, to equally pale friend: My god, we've turned into black people!
Aurora, Colorado
Overheard by: Lee
But Do They Need Math Tutoring?
Suit on cell: And then we'll use the leftover money for the Asians!
Bellevue, Washington
Overheard by: Curious
Categories: Money | On the phone | Race | Suits | Washington | Posted 2009-07-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Welcome to San Francisco
Dude to friend: And then I look over, and there's this giant white cock! (holds hands two feet apart)
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Missed the good part
Categories: Friends | Penis | Race | San Francisco | Posted 2009-07-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Camera Loves You, by the Way
Reporter to bodyguard for racist, fascist political party holding a press conference: Can you tell us why we're not being allowed to enter?
Bodyguard: You've printed repeated and insidious lies about our party.
Reporter, after long pause: We're a tv station.
Manchester
England
...So No Standards Apply to You
Black professor to black student: So I hold you to a different standard than the white students. (to white student) Except for you. Because you're from Michigan.
www.overheardatyale.com
Overheard by: Overheard at Yale
Categories: Black people | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Education | Overheard at Yale | Race | Students | Teachers | Weirdness | Whiteys | Posted 2009-07-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just a Bit Self-Conscious About His Baby-Carrot Penis
Blonde: So this guy was hitting on me and he was like, "so, do you have a boyfriend?" and I was like, "ummm, yeah." It was really creepy. I was like, "oh my god, I can not tell my boyfriend about this!" I mean, normally he wouldn't really care, but (looks around and lowers voice) this guy was black, so I think my boyfriend might flip. I mean, not that he's racist or anything.
Penn Tech
Williamsport, Pennsylvania
Categories: Bimbettes | Pennsylvania | Race | Relationships | Weirdness | Whiteys | Posted 2009-06-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Says This Every Monday.
Tram driver to very black coworker: Have you been on vacation again? You've got a great tan going on!
Gothenburg
Sweden
Overheard by: Dan Sebastian
That Hamster Was Extremely Sooty
Gay dude: No, they're just too greasy for me.
Fag hag: Says the Mexican...
Gay dude: Excuse me? I'm black by insertion.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: i don't like water
Every Now and Then, My Inner Cracker Pops Up and Says Stupid Shit
Black girl in car: God, I wish I was black so I could say things like that.
White girl in car: But wait...you are black.
Black girl in car: I can't believe I just said that!
Detroit, Michigan
If You're Gonna Fantasize, Go Big or Stay Home
Hot black chick: I don't know why you're so surprised... It's the same way I'd nail Lucy Liu and alt-world Neil Patrick Harris.
Nerdy friend: Alt-world Neil Patrick Harris?
Hot black chick: You know, where he's straight and really into black chicks.
Nerdy friend: Baffling.
New Haven, Connecticut
Categories: About celebrities | Black people | Connecticut | Default | Dorks, Geeks & Nerds | Feelings | Friends | Girls | Questions | Race | Sexuality | Posted 2009-05-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yeah, They're Always Sitting in the Front Of the Bus
Dude: It's not racial profiling, because every black person breaks the law.
High School Classroom
Englewood, Colorado
Categories: Colorado | Compare and contrast | Default | Guys | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Posted 2009-05-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
At Midnight It Turns Into a Pumpkin
Thug wannabe: Damn, you see that white girl? She got a magic booty.
Mall
Buford, Georgia
Overheard by: girl with the magical booty
Have You Considered Sarah Lawrence?
Girl #1: Let me suggest to you...
Girl #2 (interrupting): Why can't I take like drugs or sex? Something that interests me? Not like race... Not that it isn't that interesting... Not that I'm racist. I'm not a racist. (nervous laugh)
Long Island University, New York
Overheard by: Reena
A Venti Boy, If You Catch My Drift.
Barista #1: Katie, can you make one more tall Americano?
Barista #2: Katie, can you make one black straight boy love me?
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Rook
Categories: Baristas | Default | Feelings | Offers and requests | Questions | Race | Washington | Posted 2009-05-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Her IPhone Cover Looks an Awful Lot Like a Klan Hood
Teen girl: What a bitch! Like seriously, why can't I buy an iPhone cover for my BlackBerry?
Friend: I bet she was being racist.
Toronto
Canadia
...Like It Says in Our Biology Textbook?
Teen girl, looking confused: Wait, guys. (pause) Do black people see in different colors?
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Bus | Default | Girls | Offers and requests | Questions | Race | Stupidity | Teens | Washington | Posted 2009-04-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Can See They Have Separate but Equal Cages
Zookeeper: We have three types of penguins: Humboldt, Emperor, and Macaroni.
Small child watching zookeeper: Are there African American penguins?
Zookeeper, clearly flustered: Er...well...there are penguins from many countries and continents...
Milwaukee County Zoo
Wisconsin
Overheard by: Not a penguin racist
The Back Of the Shelves?
Black student: Where's the ethnic section?
White librarian: The what?
Black student: The ethnic section...you know, where all the books by black people are.
White librarian: We don't have an ethnic section, dear. You'll have to browse the shelves.
Longview College, Missouri
Overheard by: Sarah
Categories: Black people | Books | Colleges & Universities | Default | Missouri | Offers and requests | Questions | Race | Students | Posted 2009-04-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm a Bit Worried About Our "White Power" T-Shirts
Girl #1, looking at group of guys hanging out on the corner: They look like skinheads!
Girl #2: They're black.
Claremont, California
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Race | Words | Posted 2009-03-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Barack Hussein Obama?" Please.
Woman to thug in fur coat: Now, I don't even know your real name or your birth certificate name.
Thug in fur coat, puzzled: Most black people don't know each other's real names!
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: EmGusk
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Names | New Jersey | Race | Thugs | Women | Posted 2009-03-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Dog: Oh, No She Didn't!
Girl at bakery: Awwww...look at the puppy! Well, I don't know, it could just be a multiracial dog.
Dupont Circle
Washington, DC
Categories: Animals | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Race | Stores | Washington, DC | Posted 2009-03-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It All Started When I Tried to Separate the Laundry...
Preppy teenage girl #1, before Sex and the City movie: Oh! I heard that Jennifer Hewitt is in this movie!
Preppy teenage girl #2: No, it's Jennifer Hudson.
Preppy teenage girl #1: Whats the difference?
Preppy teenage girl #2: Jennifer Hewitt is the white actress who made a CD and can't sing and was in the Garfield movie. Jennifer Hudson is the black girl from American Idol who won an Oscar for that movie with Beyonce.
Preppy teenage girl #1: Are either one of them singing in this movie?
Preppy teenage girl #2: I don't know.
(long pause)
Preppy teenage girl #3: Speaking of black people, I got in trouble for being racist at work today.
Plano, Texas
Categories: About celebrities | Default | Girls | Jobs & Careers | Movies | Race | Students | Teens | Texas | Posted 2009-02-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hence the Babies
Hispanic teenager with baby, yelling out of bus doors: You're an icy bitch!
Chinese woman, muttering loudly: Fucking immigrants.
Bus Station
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: another immigrant
Categories: Bus | Compare and contrast | Default | Foreigners | Girls | Illinois | Insults | Race | Women | Posted 2009-02-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Dolly Parton Doesn't Get Out Much These Days
Blonde: Oh my god! Are you wearing makeup?
Black man in drag: Yes I am, sugar.
Blonde: Where did you get it?
Black man in drag: Um, the store.
Blonde: Do they make makeup for black people?
Pigeon Forge, Tennessee
Overheard by: Natalie
Race Relations in Boston Take Another Hit
Girl #1: So I was driving down the street blaring my rap music and then these people started hollering.
Girl #2: Wait, were they black people or were they normal people?
Northeastern Campus
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: really?
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Girls | Massachusetts | Music | Questions | Race | Posted 2009-01-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...No, Seriously, Check Out This Rash.
Four-year-old boy holding 20-something girl's hand: I've got jungle fever! I've got jungle fever!
Jungle Cruise Line
Walt Disney World, Florida
Obama Is Tony, America Is Maria, And McCain Is Bernardo
Professor: Let's move on...let's talk about Puerto Ricans in New York. And crack. And race. Well, let's start with Obama.
Mount Holyoke College
South Hadley, Massachusetts
Overheard by: lovecollege
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Drugs | Geography | Massachusetts | Names | Politics | Race | Teachers | Posted 2009-01-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Rosa Parks Was Definitely Chinese Though, Right?
7th-grade-boy to another: I didn't know Martin Luther King Jr. was black!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: scared for the future of education.
Categories: Default | Family ties | Guys | Kids | Names | Overheard in Minneapolis | Race | Posted 2009-01-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh For The Bland Culture of Yesteryear!
Political science TA: Gays and Mexicans are ruining America. Gays have no culture, and Mexicans are making everything...spicy.
Herter Hall, UMass
Amherst, Massachusetts
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Food | Massachusetts | Race | Sexuality | Students | Posted 2009-01-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Martin Luther King: *Facepalm*
Boy: Why didn't black people just move back to Africa after slavery ended?
Girl: They didn't have the money to.
Boy: They could have gotten the money if they really wanted.
Girl: They didn't want to move back to Africa! They wanted to stay here, they just wanted equal rights. What's wrong with that?
Boy: I'm just saying that they could have moved back if they wanted rights and stuff.
Girl: That's the most retarded thing I've ever heard. Seriously, just stop talking.
(some time later)
Girl: This is why I hate white people, no offense you guys. I don't hate you personally, just as a race in general. They piss me off.
Boy: That's racist. Wow, this tastes good.
Panera at Fashion Square Mall
Orlando, Florida
White People: "We're Not Touching This One."
Fat black woman to son running away: Don't make me go African American on your ass, now get back here!
Shafer Dining
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Lacy
Categories: Black people | Default | Fat people | Moms | Offers and requests | Parenting | Race | Restaurants | Virginia | Women | Words | Posted 2008-12-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Might Even Trump the Popularity of Pregnant or Fat?
Black guy: You keep hearing about how racist Britain's getting, it's pretty scary.
White girlfriend: Oh, totally. I think that before anyone in that country over 40 is allowed to make a public statement they should take a test that's like "is this quaint, or just racist?" and if they fail they shouldn't be allowed to say anything.
Black guy: That would be an awesome game show.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
I Warned Him That Jumping While Dark Was a Felony in These Parts
Yuppie: So then this guy jumped out wearing a ski mask and at first I laughed, but then I realized he was black!
Goshen, Indiana
Overheard by: Dej
As Well As a Yumminess Thing
Black girl on one side: We look like an Oreo!
White girl in middle (jokingly): Oh, is that a race thing?
Black girl on the other side: Yes.
Outside Harvard Medical School
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Categories: Black people | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Food | Girls | Massachusetts | Questions | Race | Students | Whiteys | Posted 2008-11-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Any Questions?
English professor: Outer space is occupied by evil orientals.
Marymount University
Arlington, Virginia
Overheard by: Sarah Yvonne
Senator Obama's Primary Obstacle
Blonde #1: Woaaaaah!
Blonde #2: What?
Blonde #1: Look! A black guy!
Blonde #2: Woaaah!
Valencia Mall, California
Overheard by: Tim
And It's His Last Term
Midwestern American: Well, we never did find out if he was a racist or not, but there's not a whole lot left of him to find out now.
London
England
Overheard by: doe
Categories: Death & dying | Default | England | Race | Tourists | Posted 2008-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Not As Fun As Quiet Contemplation Of Our Lord's Bounty, But Close
Middle-aged African American bus driver: So what if she is? I wear heels and I'm 5′8". I wear them to church.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger: Oh, but at least at church you're sitting down.
Middle-aged African American bus driver: Oh no, honey. I'm up singing and dancing. I go to a black church. We get our praise on.
Prim-looking Caucasian female passenger (after uncomfortable pause): That sounds fun.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: yes it does
Categories: Black people | Compare and contrast | Conductors | Default | Overheard in Minneapolis | Race | Religion | Shoes | Whiteys | Women | Posted 2008-10-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'd See You're Full Of Shit Is What I'd See
Professor: I mean, if you saw Eminem on the street you'd say, "He's white," but if you see him kickin' ass in 8 Mile, then you'd see he's black.
Haines Hall
UCLA, California
Overheard by: downtown
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Movies | Music | Race | Teachers | Posted 2008-10-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Warren Beatty Should Stop Having Work Done
Tall, skinny kid: He's...like...suspiciously Asian.
Tall skinny friend: That's what I thought too!
Arby's
Tempe, Arizona
Beats a Cat in a Hat and a Big Red Dog
Chick: I should write children's books based on those stories: the volleyball girl with bad luck, and the girl with the feet of a black man.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Overheard by: Lee
Yeah, Um, About That Jerri-Curl
Camp counselor: Do you have shampoo with you?
Seven-year-old camper: I don't wash my hair. I'm black! Duh.
Rec Center Pool
New York, New York
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Hair | Health & Hygiene | Kids | New York | Questions | Race | Teachers | Posted 2008-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And How You Spent Your Summer Vacation
Black girl on cell: So, uh? So then, you explain what a cracker is to you...
Tacoma Mall, Washington
Overheard by: Troy
Categories: Black people | Default | Girls | Malls | On the phone | Race | Washington | Words | Posted 2008-09-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Got My Own Personal Trail Of Tears Over Here
Crazy old white lady trying on wedding veil: So I always wondered why I didn't look good in these things...until 2004.
Disinterested customer: Oh?
Crazy old white lady: Yeah, then I found out I was part Native American. At least 5%.
Disinterested customer (confused): Oh...?
Crazy, old white lady: Yeah. That's why I don't look good in veils. Cause we Native Americans don't wear them.
Disinterested customer: I got married in a courthouse.
Crazy old white lady: I hate to say it since I am part white, but damn those white people!
Goodwill
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Categories: Clothes | Crazies | Customers | Default | Family ties | History | Insults | Mental illnesses | Old folks | Pennsylvania | Race | Stores | Whiteys | Women | Posted 2008-09-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Some Guys Prefer to Be Firmly Held
Little kid (skipping and yelling): Tighty whitey man! Tighty whitey man!
Mount Vernon Farmers' Market
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: livin'
A Woman Never Knows When Her Uterus Will Get Gentrified
Black woman to child: You just mama's little white boy, aren't you? Yes you are!
Passing Hispanic woman: Is he really white?
Wal-Mart Parking Lot
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Walk By Faster
Categories: Black people | Compare and contrast | Default | Latinos | Malls | Questions | Race | Texas | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2008-09-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How Heidi Met Seal
Female suit: Do you know how scary it is to have a black man fall on you in the middle of the night?!
Mesa, Arizona
Fifth Grade's Usually When Kids Develop Flayva
White girl to Hispanic chick: I swear, in 5th grade you were, like, white.
Hispanic chick: White, like, acted white? Or white like white skin?
White girl: Like, white. Weren't you ever white?
Panera Bread
Fairlawn, New Jersey
Overheard by: Siberia
Categories: Age and ageing | Bars & Clubs | Chicks | Default | Foreigners | Memory lane | New Jersey | Questions | Race | Posted 2008-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Preschool Storytime Is Very Different in Canadia
Teacher: There was this black guy streaking at night. I mean, it's not like you could see anything!
Canadia
We're on to You, Kathy Griffin
Exceedingly pale college guy: You can't trust redheads. They don't blink their eyes at the same time.
Exceedingly pale high school guy: (nods in understanding)
Arby's
Tempe, Arizona
Kiss Me, KKKate Runs Into Trouble in Rehearsals
Girl #1: Jane*, I've gotten worse...
Girl #2: At what?
Girl #1: At hating Jews.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Laughing hysterically
...Go to Med School?
20-something girl on cell: I'm sunburnt, drunk, and Asian, so why not? Why not?
The Wildcat Lounge
Santa Barbara, California
Categories: Bars & Clubs | California | Default | Drinking & drunks | Girls | Gripes | Questions | Race | Posted 2008-08-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Massah, I Sho Is Happy You Dink I's Ah Nice Negro
Redneck: I'm not racist or anything, I mean, this guy was a pretty nice nigger. He didn't even try to steal my money.
Adrian, Michigan
...As This Photo Album Clearly Illustrates
Girl #1: Oh my god, black guys have the biggest penises in the world.
Girl #2: No way!
Girl #1: Really, it was as big as my thigh.
Random lady sitting next to them: Oh my god, they are!
Los Angeles, California
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Penis | Race | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why They Stopped Serving Champagne at UN Events
Dude leaving party: Just remember we have one goal. We have one shared dream, people. It starts with "I" and ends with "no more motherfucking apartheid."
Kalamazoo, Michigan
A Real Sex God
Literature teacher: So what the Europeans did was take the description of Jesus from the texts and made their images of him Caucasian so as to be more relatable to those they were teaching to.
Girl of questionable literacy: European Jesus was hot.
Delta Secondary School
Ladner, British Columbia
Canadia
A Black Friend Wearing Fubu Might Even Get Me Free Drinks
White girl: I wish I had an Obama t-shirt to wear tonight. (pause) Although I'm sure if I brought a black friend it'd be just the same.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: lb
Would It Help If I Glued This Viola to My Hand?
Non-Asian student to Asian student: Dude, I keep forgetting you're Asian.
Asian student: I know! Me too!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: m. Jo.
And Who You Callin' a Dias?
Old man with mullet to brown child in stroller: Buenos dias, niñito.
Woman pushing stroller: We're black. He knows English.
Gallivan Center Trax Station
Salt Lake City, Utah
Plus We'd Have to Be Open and Honest About Our Feelings
White mother to teen daughters after black family walks by: I'm so glad you two aren't black! Then I'd have to put all those little beads in your hair and--well I'm just really glad.
Versailles, Kentucky
...Is the Thesis of My American Lit Dissertation
Saxophone-playing dude: [About Huck Finn] You really think some ten-year-old white boy is gonna be running around with a crazy black man like "Woo hoo! Everything's cool!"? No way, man, they woulda ate him!
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Categories: Books | Compare and contrast | Connecticut | Default | Guys | Kids | Race | Violence | Posted 2008-06-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If Chris Rock Had a Nickel for Every Time He's Heard That...
Teen boy to other teen boy: You'd be racist if you weren't so funny.
Leeds, England
Overheard by: Ashleigh
Categories: Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Guys | Race | Teens | UK | Posted 2008-05-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now In Stores, Ghetto Booty Barbie
Girl: Everyone knows Barbie is disproportional. Look! She has no butt! And her waist is tiny.
[Pause.]
Professor: I bet black Barbie has a big butt.
Los Angeles, California
Categories: Body parts | California | Compare and contrast | Girls | Insults | Race | Teachers | Posted 2008-05-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We're More Of a Honky Hut Family
Black student to white teacher: So we're going to Sarasota to visit a college up there. Do you know the easiest way to get there?
White teacher: Sure! You can take I-75 straight up, and if you want to stop for something to eat, there's Cracker Barrel all over the place.
Black student: Cracker Barrel? Umm, no, I don't think so...
Design and Architecture High School
Miami, Florida
Categories: Advice | Black people | Fears | Florida | Food | Names | Offers and requests | Questions | Race | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Students | Teachers | US Geography | Posted 2008-05-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yeah, Technically 'Martians' and 'Venusians'
Guy in sociology class: So male and female... Are those races?
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: doug
Categories: Class | Education | Gender issues | Guys | Overheard at Cornell | Questions | Race | Students | Stupidity | Posted 2008-05-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Not the Demographic to Fear in Colorado
Girl #1: Why does Denzel Washington with a gun freak me out?
Girl #2: Because he's black.
Movie Theater
Colorado
Can You Picture Martha Stewart on a Public Bus?
Thug #1: Why the hell are you going all the way to back of the train car? Why don't we sit in the front like that Martha Stewart woman?
Thug #2: What the fuck are you talking about Martha Stewart?
Thug #1: You know, she stood up for herself on the bus? Wait, who was that? Not Martha Stewart?
Orange Line at Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: drunkbigirls
Stop Being White in Popeye's!
Black girl #1: Okay, I know what I'm getting. Do you know what you're getting?
White girl: I've never been here before. Let me look for a while. [Pauses, then yells.] Wait a minute! Popeye's a sailor; Why does he sell chicken?
Black girl #2: Oh my god, shut up now or no more vodka for you for the rest of the night!
White girl: Okay. [Giggles.] I'm sorry.
[Black girls start talking to each other.]
White girl, yelling: Why are there no white people in here?!
Black girl #1: Aww fuck, take her outside to the car. This is her first and last time ever coming here!
Popeye's
Trenton, New Jersey
Categories: Advice | Black people | Compare and contrast | Drinking & drunks | Drunks | Food | Friends | Girls | New Jersey | Questions | Race | Restaurants | Threats | Wishes | Posted 2008-05-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
All I Asked Was, "Does That Come with Fries?"
Light-skinned black woman: I'm just saying, I'd have been in the home and not in the fields.
Taco Mac
Atlanta, Georgia
Categories: Black people | Georgia | History | Jobs & Careers | Race | Restaurants | Women | Posted 2008-05-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Isn't That the Title of an Inspirational Children's Book?
Little boy to his mother: Why is everybody white and I'm brown?
Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Categories: Black people | Compare and contrast | Kids | Kids | Massachusetts | Questions | Race | Posted 2008-04-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm... Black?
Traffic cop: She said, "Do you like it?" and I was like, "Yeah, it looks really nice." And then she said, "Is it subtle?" and I was like "Jenny*, you're a black woman with orange and yellow hair!"
Plymouth, Michigan
Overheard by: Morgz
Whatever You Say, Latonya
Woman in line to another: Yeah, my brother's birthday is tomorrow. He's Aryan.
Wal-Mart
Tracy, California
Overheard by: Jeff
Categories: Age and ageing | California | Default | Family ties | On the phone | Pride | Race | Stores | Stupidity | Whiteys | Women | Posted 2008-04-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Mean, I Am, but That's Neither Here Nor There
Black lady on cell: I said, 'Yeah, I'm black, but dat don' mean I be makin' counterfeit money!'
Food Lion
Sanford, North Carolina
Overheard by: Elizabeth
Categories: Black people | Crimes | Default | North Carolina | On the phone | Race | Women | Posted 2008-04-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
None of the Races Are Much of a Bargain
Asian girl: I hate being Asian!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by:
Does That Ever Work on Black People?
Leathery hobo to passing students: One of you white-ass, livin'-inside motherfuckers owes me a dollar!
Austin, Texas
Twenty-Year-Old White Guys: That Hurts. Let's Have Sex!
30-something black woman #1: The eye is superficial.
30-something black woman #2: Yeah, like 20-year-old white guys.
Community College
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Madison
Categories: Black people | Body parts | Compare and contrast | Default | Ohio | Race | Women | Posted 2008-03-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Did He Know That?
Clerk: Hitler was a black man. Did you know that?
Long's Drugs
Oakland, California
Categories: Blue collar | California | Default | History | Race | Stores | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Careful Not to Spend Too Much Time with Women
Asian guy: I hate going there. There's too many Asian people. I hate being around so many Asian people. It feels too foreign.
Asian friend, holding two Japanese language books: Yeah.
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Kunoichi
To Fight Convention?
Tall goth girl to rotund, geeky friend: She's a fat black goth! Kinda like if you, me, and Bill Cosby joined forces.
Denver, Colorado
Categories: About celebrities | Colorado | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Goths | Gripes | Race | Stupidity | Posted 2008-02-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Black on Black Crime's Hidden Nuances
Fat black woman on cell: Black women are better than white women, because you can beat the shit out of them and the bruises won't be visible!
BART train
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Gilatron
Categories: Black people | California | Compare and contrast | Default | Fat people | Race | Violence | Women | Posted 2008-02-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Does a Shih Tzu Really Count?
Chick, breaking long silence: Look! An Asian!
Everyone on bus, in unison: Yay!
High school bus
Englewood, Colorado
Plus, You Get to Have Boobs
Asian girl: Well, I don't know what it's like being white.
White girl: You feel guilty all the time.
White guy: Yeah, for things you never did.
Asian girl: Awesome!
Centennial College
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Meech
China: Give Us Time.
Korean girl: You know, I can't tell us apart, either.
Chinese girl: Yeah, I just think everyone's Chinese.
High school bathroom
Newmarket, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: slightly relieved
Sweetie, All Men Are Transparent
Hobo: Damn, shorty, you lookin' good!
Black girl, groping white boy passerby: I don't like the dark chocolate -- I need a boy I can see my reflection in!
Washington, DC
Overheard by: D.B.
Categories: Black people | Hobos | Race | Washington, DC | Posted 2008-01-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Even after He Put on a Polo Shirt
Guy: I knew a Japanese bloke once. He changed his name to Smith... Mind you, he still looked Japanese.
Shout-out: overheardlines.blogspot.com
Overheard by: O.B.
Categories: Guys | Names | Overheard Lines | Race | Posted 2008-01-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Your Explanation for Everything!
Daughter #1: Mom, do you remember when we were little and we met that little boy whose name was Chelsea?
Daughter #2: Who the hell would name their boy 'Chelsea'?!
Mom: Well, they might have been oriental, you guys.
Columbus, Ohio
Can't Imagine How That Made 'em the Dominant Culture
Little Hispanic boy: I want more food.
Dad, calmly: Okay. We just have to get another plate.
Little Hispanic boy: But I want more food!
Dad: Okay! We just need to go get you another plate.
Little Hispanic boy: But I want more food!
Dad, yelling: I said 'okay'! I just have to get you a new plate!
Little Hispanic boy, shocked: You yelled at me...
Dad: Well, I tried speaking to you like a white man, but you wouldn't listen.
Chinese buffet
Reading, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Hole
Categories: Dads | Gripes | Pennsylvania | Race | Should have used a condom | Posted 2008-01-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Do White People Even Have "People"?
Group of white guys: We're visiting here from South Africa.
Loud drunk girl: Do you miss your people?
Arlington, Virginia
Except in the Movie We'd Know Kung Fu Instead of Getting Brutally Mugged
Asian guy to friends, with black stranger behind them: It's like a movie -- every time I look back, the black guy gets closer.
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Asians | Overheard at McGill | Race | Posted 2008-01-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He's My Favorite Black Friend
Drunk guy: America is the greatest! If you don't like it, get out! Out with the riff-raff!
Friend: Stanley the Racist would be so proud of you.
Drunk guy: Man, it was great seeing Stanley the Racist again. Next time I see him, I'm going to give him a big man-hug.
E line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: elena
Categories: Drunks | Gripes | Massachusetts | Names | Race | Posted 2007-12-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Last Time We Rented a Movie, I Almost Went Blind
Young black woman #1: What's We Own the Night about?
Young black woman #2: One guy's a cop, and his brother is a gangster or something.
Young black woman #1: Does it have black people in it or white people?
Young black woman #2: White people.
Young black woman #1: Let's see something else.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Jason Bourne
Categories: Black people | Ohio | Race | Posted 2007-12-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Losing Control --Too... Many... Stereotypes...
Guy: Nah, Ed, you can't ever be creepy -- you're Asian.
Ed, indignantly: Dude!
Guy: I mean, unless you're a ninja--
Passerby: --With a sword!
Algonquin Conference Center
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
There Are Black People in Wisconsin?
Black party hostess: So, are there any black people in Nevada?
Drunk white hippie girl from Nevada: No! But we might as well be black, because we're so uneducated and everything, you know? [Room, full of black professionals, explodes with laughter.]
Black suit: I need a very dry martini right now.
Gregory Street
Madison, Wisconsin
Categories: Black people | Race | Whiteys | Wisconsin | Posted 2007-11-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
God, Asians Are Racists, Too?
Asian #1, watching Asian driver: Asian drivers suck!
Asian #2: Dude, you are one!
Asian #1: Oh, yeah.
Queen Street
Auckland
New Zealand
Categories: Asians | New Zealand | Race | Posted 2007-10-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh, Wait, That's Whoopi Goldberg
British lady: My, look at that -- they've cast a black man as Othello...
Othello performance, Stratford Festival Theatre
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Foreigners | Race | Posted 2007-10-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Never Twice
Black chick #1: God, I love your eyes! They are so chinky!
Black chick #2: People say that.
Binghamton University
Binghamton, New York
Overheard by: Hadas
Categories: Chicks | Compliments | New York | Race | Posted 2007-10-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But We Have Legal Marijuana
Canadian tourist #1: Guys, you know what the States have that most of Canada doesn't?
Three others: What?
Canadian tourist #1: Black people...
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: Bored At Work
Yeah, It's Pretty Much Only Crunchy White Folks These Days
Professor: Are there any Buddhists in this class? Anyone in here a Buddhist? Huh? All these Asians and no Buddhists?!
Johns Hopkins University
Baltimore, Maryland
Like That Time You Dragged Me to Popeye's
Tourist at Folklife Festival: You're just looking for an excuse to take a picture of a black person.
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com