Recent | Best Of
Nerdy frat boy #1: You know what we should do? Just go buy a video game, sit down, and fucking beat it.
Nerdy frat boy #2: Yeah!
Sorority girl, guffawing: Why would you buy a video game to jack off?!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Charlie G.
Nerdy girl to Asian friend: I mean, it was pathetic. I could've had my top off and had a sign around my neck that said "free blowjobs" and they wouldn't have noticed. They were all crowded around Mike watching him play Pokemon.
Chicago, Illinois
20-something guy in the middle of a group: Guys, guys. I've got big news.
(group quiets down)
20-something guy: I just got a text from Ross. It says "Let's put it this way: they've stopped the ride, are cleaning up my vomit, and I'm leaving in a wheelchair. Spaceship Earth."
(group cheers)
Disney World
Orlando, Florida
Skinny Asian kid buying 24-pack of Keystone Light, to friend: I dunno man. I've never played beer pong against a black dude before.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Ian
Girl: So I think he's taken our relationship a step further.
Gay friend: Oh! What, did he ask you out?
Girl: No.
Gay friend: Did he finally tell you he likes you?
Girl: No! Nothing like that.
Gay friend: Then what?
Girl: He started talking to me exclusively in D&D jargon!
Gay friend: See, this is why we have different tastes in men.
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Doesn't play D&D
Religion professor: Contrary to popular belief, bingo is not a sacrament!
North Central Michigan College
Asian girl in bright coat: Oh my fucking god, I think I just lost my virginity.
Blonde girl: Wait, how does that even work?
Asian girl in bright coat: The end of the teeter-totter seat is like totally up my ass, and it's like penetrating.
Blonde girl: Oh.
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Shawn
Old Midwestern lady #1: All these kids bringing their videos games everywhere!
Old Midwestern lady #2: It's depressing! My son-in-law brings his laptop everywhere. Always on the internet.
Old Midwestern lady #1: Is he using one of those blueberries? Or blackpods?
Old Midwestern lady #2: I don't know, I'm just glad I'm old.
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: thankfully on a different flight
Friend #1: I just want a Dance Dance Revolution mat that won't skid around on the floor while I dance on it. I am thinking about covering my old one in an unskiddable material.
Friend #2: Well, you could try human skin.
Friend #1: Does it skid?
Friend #2: Only when wet.
Gamestop
Omaha, Nebraska.
Professor: It's hard to have an orgy without orgasms. What? It's true! What're you gonna do, play video games?
University of San Francisco
San Francisco, California
12-year-old boy: You see?! Dungeons & Dragons applies to real life!
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: cubicle slave
Drunk gamer #1, about Warhawk: Those Japanese were amazing!
Drunk gamer #2: But you know, in Japan there's so many people, and so much time.
Boulder, Colorado
Girl #1, playing Tetris: Stop moving your feet, it's distracting me.
Girl #2: I wasn't trying to distract you! I needed to crack my ankles.
Girl #1: I bet Hitler just needed to crack his ankles too, he didn't mean to kill all those Jews.
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Estelle
Guy to stranger: Is it just me, or is that guy jerking off to Pac-Man?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Older man: You kids gonna come out and play?
Kid: Play what?
Older man: Cornhole.
Indiana
Young Asian cop easing old Asian man out of police car: My first day on the beat and already I'm finding out about and busting illegal Mahjong parlors! I didn't know they existed!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McF
Lounging suburban man to passers-by: Your kids look like they want to do the chicken limbo.
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: The cool aunt
Queer, after being rushed to play Scrabble: You don't understand what it's like having all vowels!
Drunk girl: You don't understand what it's like having a vagina, so who wins?
Queer: I do! I have an emotional vagina.
Long Beach, California
Overheard by: pucewoman
Male golfer to 20-something son and his girlfriend: See, that's the problem golfing with a female. If there are no women here, the world is your toilet!
The Magnolia Golf Course, DisneyWorld
Orlando, Florida
Asian woman: You know, I'm not normally a lesbian. I was just scoping out the competition last night!
Christchurch
New Zealand
Beefy tattooed inmate: Hey, does anyone know how to play twister?
(rest of unit groans)
Vancouver Island Maximum Security Prison
Canadia
Little boy being pushed in cart: You smell!
Dad: No, you smell!
Little boy: No, you smell!
Dad: You smell!
(a little later)
Little boy: That was awful!
Dad: Only because you think it is.
Little boy: You're a sock!
Dad: Oh, I'm a sock now?
Little boy: A soooock!
Dad: No, you're a sock!
Whole Foods
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Kafrin
Bus preacher: Prime time bingo is the key to hell.
Kingston
Jamaica
Father to son in stroller: Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall; Humpty Dumpty had a great fall; Humpty Dumpty hired a great lawyer; Humpty Dumpty sued the pants of the wall maker.
K Street
Washington, DC
Eight-year-old boy playing Nintendo: Die! Die! Diediediediediediedie!
Older brother: Isn't that a little violent?
Eight-year-old: I'm goddam Kirby! I can do anything I want!
Houston, Texas
Girl who always rides skateboard: And so we were playing ping pong, and he took his shirt off!
Friend: Right.
Girl who always rides skateboard: And then he let me hit stuff against him!
Rangi Ruru Girls' School
New Zealand
Sunday school teacher: We're going to play a fun game next! Does anybody want to guess what it is?
Five-year-old student: Take of our shirts and pants?
Sunday school teacher: No!
Sunday School Classroom
Fredericton
Canadia
Overheard by: Andrew
Man to daughter entering race: So, do you have to quack while you run, or...how does that work?
4th of July Parade
Brighton, Michigan
Overheard by: Tonya
Counselor: What do you need Legos for?
Nine-year-old boy: To make weaponry!
Center for Autism and Emotional Support
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Guy: I'm not going to stop and ask someone, "excuse me, where are your ray guns?"
CVS
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: ZB
Student: Have you ever heard of the penis game?
Female professor: Which one? I've played many penis games.
Greek Myth Class
Illinois Wesleyan University
Overheard by: problem
Friend #1, driving: Yeah, she'll be okay with it, she'll just be like...oh, motherfucker, I'll stab you in the face!!
Friend #2: What?
Friend #1: She'll be okay with it, though, she'll just be like...pedidle!
Friend #2: (silence)
Friend #1: What?! Did you see that car? She'll be okay with it, she'll just be like, oh...okay.
Bentleyville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: concerned friend
Single 30-something woman to friend, as random guy rides by on bike: I would so ride off with him and do anything he wants...unless he's totally into dungeons and shit.
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: Steve
Lacrosse player: Bro, dude, all I did today was play Halo and grow my hair.
overheardatyale.com
Overheard by: overheardatyale
TA on cell: No, I do not want to play "guess who's pregnant?" again.
University of Florida
Overheard by: nick
Girl on cell: I think the relationship really started going downhill when he took Western Australia from me.
Seattle, Washington
Tall adolescent: Peach sucks. Daisy's okay, but peach sucks.
Short adolescent: See, I've always been more of a toad fan. Even if he does look kind of like a circumcised wang.
Tall adolescent: Oh, you.
Missoula, Montana
Black guy: You keep hearing about how racist Britain's getting, it's pretty scary.
White girlfriend: Oh, totally. I think that before anyone in that country over 40 is allowed to make a public statement they should take a test that's like "is this quaint, or just racist?" and if they fail they shouldn't be allowed to say anything.
Black guy: That would be an awesome game show.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Girl #1: So, how do orgies work? I don't really get it.
Girl #2: I dunno. I think if you see a hole, you just fill it with whatever you've got.
Girl #3: It's like Tetris!
Gold Coast
Australia
Random girl on date: Sometimes I wonder what life was like before playing cards?
Stuttgart
Germany
Dart player #1: You're kicking ass because you can aim with your lazy eye.
Dart player #2: No, I'm not using my lazy eye.
Dart player #1: Well, it's still not fair.
Riprock's
Denton, Texas
Overheard by: still glad i don't have a lazy eye
Girl to friends: I thought I was playing hard to get, but it turns out I was playing "I hate you".
Elon University
Elon, North Carolina
Professor to suits: Did you watch the news last night? Apparently Dumbledore's gay now!
UC Davis
Davis, California
Overheard by: Passing Biker
Girl to boyfriend: My ass is not a magic 8-ball.
Cornmarket Street
Oxford
England
Girl with fake sword to group of fifty kids with fake swords (prepping them before their war in the park): Today is not about living, today is about dying. You will die at least 100 times today. And you will love it!
Clark Park
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: afraid of kids
Random board gamer: Settlers of Catan was created in the bowels of hell to make otherwise intelligent people say: "I have wood for sheep."
Epoch Coffee
Austin, Texas
Hippie using his pocket PC: It's very primitive -I use it for solitaire while pooping.
Bean & Leaf Coffee Shop
New London, Connecticut
Overheard by: Overand
Girl on phone: Hey girl! I just got done lubricating my Rubik's cube!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: momo
Excited student: I got a B+ on my Nietzsche paper!
Friend: The one based on a Dungeons & Dragons joke?
Auraria Campus
Denver, Colorado
(around a D&D table)
Boom: Boom the Barbarian is going to swing his sword.
Walk-in kid: Dude, your character sheet says he's a fighter.
Boom: Yeah. But his name is Boom the Barbarian.
Walk-in kid: That's gay.
Boom: It won't be gay when I boom all over your face.
Openly gay DM: Actually, it would.
Gaming Center
Grand Rapids, Michigan
60-year-old journalism professor: Oh, the choking game? Heh... I play that all the time.
Emerson College
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sarah
Tipsy girlfriend, playing "Never Have I Ever": Never have I ever done 69 with anyone.
Boyfriend: Ping.
Girlfriend: What?! Who did you 69?!
Boyfriend: You, fool!
Girlfriend: Oh.
Ohio University
Athens, Ohio
Overheard by: outfirst
Girl: "Pokemon Stadium," is just stupid. If the other Pokemon does some confusion attack, you just end up slapping yourself or some shit. No one gets so confused they hurt themselves!
Boy: Tell that to Danny Bonaduce.
Worcester, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Katie
Nine-year-old girl, planning game: So he'll be the priest, and you can be the wet nurse.
Mount Vernon, New York
Gamer dude: ... and the game comes with like, real guns.
Wannabe goth chick: They're actual guns?
Gamer dude: Well like, real models. And it comes with this mirror that lets you see yourself and like, shows what you look like if you get shot in the face.
Wannabe goth chick: That's nice. That's not something you would normally get to see if you got shot in the face.
UAB
Birmingham, Alabama
Overheard by: Kitty-Jack
MIT frat boy #1: I'm just saying, everybody has a strip poker tournament during rush week. We need something different.
MIT frat boy #2: You mean, like, strip risk or battleship?
MIT frat boy #1: Um... Sure.
Chinese Restaurant
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Brian
Girl, looking at video games: If I had a sword that pimp, I would just kill people all day and run around.
Boy following her: Girl, if you had a sword that pimp I would stop being gay and make you stop to make love to me.
Girl, looking appalled: I'd be busy killing people, though.
Boy, matter-of-factly: Well... I'd make you stop every thirteen kills.
Random Walmart
Boise, Idaho
Overheard by: Bunnee
Student: Somebody drew a triforce in the bathroom.
Teacher: There's a penis in the hall and now a triforce in the bathroom?
English Class
Arcadia, California
Overheard by: Sam
10-year-old boy to Scrabble players: You guys are playing Scrabble? That's totally pimpin'!
Comic book store
Towson, Maryland
Super nerd #1: You look tired.
Super nerd #2: Yea...
Super nerd #1: I bet you were up till three AM playing World of Warcraft.
Super nerd #2: Yeah...
Super nerd #1: Yeah, I just got the new patch. It's downloading right now. Its an 80-gig patch... I mean, 80-meg patch.
Super nerd #2: Phew! [Panting] Don't do that to me!
Virginia Tech
Blacksburg, Virginia
Girl #1: We were having fun!
Girl #2: You're sodomizing that poor boy!
Girl #1: That's how we played! He loved that game!
Starbucks
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: hannah
Nerd: Just think of how much money I saved over winter break by playing World of Warcraft -- it was 10 dollars a month instead of paying for all the stuff I would have done had I gone out.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: doug
Mother: Derek, come back here!
Five-year-old: No! You can't tell me what to do! I'm going to go gamble some more! [Runs off.]
CAT ferry from Nova Scotia to Portland, Maine
Overheard by: Misaki
Man to friend: Let's play the handicapped game -- paralyzed, or just lazy?
Epcot Park, Disney World
Orlando, Florida
40-year-old virgin #1: Did I tell you I beat Mortal Kombat?
40-year-old virgin #2: Uh-uh.
40-year-old virgin #1: Well, I did, and now my life has no meaning.
Birmingham, Alabama
Dork #1: Yeah, but Super Mario had the princess...
Dork #2: I'd rather fuck the squirrel [in Sonic] than that square-ass bitch!
Shout-out: overheardinumcp.blogspot.com
Overheard by: thomas
High school boy #1: Know what I'm gonna do?
High school boy #2: You're gonna jizz in my mouth.
High school boy #1: I'm gonna go to a third world country, buy four people, put them in an arena, and make them play Super Smash Brothers in real life. For Pikachu I'm gonna put thousand-volt batteries in his cheeks.
Ride-On bus
Washington, DC
Overheard by: bus rider
Geek #1: I would totally do Chun-Li.
Geek #2: Dude, she's a fictional video game character...
Geek #1: I don't care, she's smoking hot.
Geek #2: Whatever, she's only 16-bit.
Shout-out: overheardina2.blogspot.com
Overheard by: eric
Beholder: You are not a beholder, buddy.
Non-beholder: Nah, dude. I'm pretty sure I behold.
Duffield
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: benji