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Doesn't That Make Me More Of a Lady?
Sewing machine shop customer #1: How often should I get my machine serviced?
Sewing machine shop customer #2: Gosh, I've never had my machine serviced!
Sewing machine shop owner: You are not a lady!
Shout-out: www.violaraptor.co.uk
Overheard by: Raptor
Categories: Customers | Euphemisms | Gender issues | Other sites | Questions | Posted 2011-07-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I'm Allergic to Flannel.
Anime-loving teenager on cell: So it's like I'm a lesbian in a man's body. Except I like boys.
CTrain
Calgary
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Gender issues | On the phone | Sexuality | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2011-02-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
From My Big Book Of Things to Say Before Bursting Into Tears
Girl on phone: But I don't have a mustache...
Colorado State University
Categories: Beauty | Body parts | Character | Colorado | Gender issues | On the phone | Posted 2011-01-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...According to This Barbie Doll.
Fashionable, ditzy young woman at cheese counter: A lot of girls cheat on their taxes because they just don't know how to do them.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: dismayed feminist
Categories: Gender issues | Minnesota | Stupidity | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2010-12-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When You Built Me That Bird-Feeder from Scratch
Sixteen-year-old blonde goth: I think I want to be a lesbian.
Teenage friend: I thought you were one.
Salem, Oregon
Overheard by: Geneva
Categories: Bringing it back to you | Gender issues | Goths | Oregon | Sexuality | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-12-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Pepper Spray Exists.
Man to bundled up girl who sat down ten minutes before: Whoa, whoa, whoa! You're a lady? I mean, when you sat down, I totally thought you were a man. I can see you're a lady now, but I could've sworn...
Girl: Uhmmm... Yeah, thanks.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Ian
Categories: Clothes | Gender issues | Guys | Overheard in Minneapolis | Weirdness | Posted 2010-12-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Bitch Stole My Louis Vuitton Luggage and Skipped Town
Flamboyant gay dude: I'm trying to get in touch with my inner prostitute.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: not buying
Categories: Feelings | Gays | Gender issues | Texas | Weirdness | Posted 2010-12-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When a Marriage Unravels, Both Spouses Know
Girl: I had a dream you died, and I woke up crying.
Guy: I woke up screaming, but that's because I dreamed I was being chased by aliens.
Bellingham, Washington
Categories: Couples | Gender issues | Relationships | Threats | Washington | Posted 2010-11-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Would Like to Thank Her for "Balls Deep in Rainbow Town"
20-something girl #1, laughing: Your son is totally gay!
20-something girl #2: He so is! He reminds me of Jack from Dawson's Creek. He's athletic and can play it pretty hetero, but deep down he's balls-deep in rainbow town. Very impressive for a five-year-old.
Roseville, California
Overheard by: MeganMama
Categories: California | Gender issues | Kids | Moms | Sexuality | Posted 2010-11-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Because I Won't Make That Mistake Again.
Student, during class: Are we talking about real prostitutes or a guy who duct tapes everything back and puts a skirt on?
Stockton College
New Jersey
Overheard by: Charlie
Categories: Body parts | Clothing | Gender issues | Jobs & Careers | New Jersey | Students | Posted 2010-10-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Good Thing You Issued That Disclaimer, Bob
Middle aged shop owner, as female vocalist sings pop song on the radio: I ain't no queer or nothing, but the first time I heard this song, I thought it was pretty as hell.
Waco, Texas
Categories: Bosses | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Music | Texas | Posted 2010-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Superman Gets So Much Girlie Action.
Younger heavy metal guy with older coworkers: I never find the right size of long johns in the winter, so I buy women's tights instead. (older coworkers look at him in shock) What? I was kidding! Morning humor, you know.
Macho guy sitting behind: Yeah, women's tights make your junk look bigger!
Commuter Train
Stockholm
Sweden
Overheard by: strictly boxers.
Then She Turned Him Gay With Her Womanliness
Female professor: She was a lesbian...
Male student: Yeah, she was.
Female professor: But he turned her straight with his manliness...
Male student: Yeah, he did.
Appalachian State University
Boone, North Carolina
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Gender issues | North Carolina | Sexuality | Students | Teachers | Weirdness | Posted 2010-09-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Always Making Generalizations About Particular Groups
College chick: Oh my god! Girls are, like, so racist.
University of Washington
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Jackie
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Gender issues | Race | Sorority types | Washington | Posted 2010-09-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And My Analyst Will Hold You While I Do So
Man on cell: I've never shown hostility towards women, but if you ever call that transvestite my mother, I will beat you senseless.
Savannah, Georgia
Categories: Family ties | Gender issues | Georgia | Guys | On the phone | Parenting | Threats | Violence | Posted 2010-08-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yeah. I Guess.
Guy: Men are bastards. I'm a man.
Girl: Then what does that make you?
Guy: Huh?
Girl: You said men are bastards. So then what does that make you?
Guy, not paying attention: Wanna dance?
Norman, Oklahoma
Categories: Dancing | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Insults | Offers and requests | Oklahoma | Posted 2010-08-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Straight Guys Totally Understand Why Girls Like Girls
Short skinny emo girl: I'm half gay.
Preppy dude walking by: There is so much to say there, so much to say.
Natick, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Un-gay friend.
Categories: Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | Preppies | Sexuality | Skinny people | Posted 2010-08-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Have Mom and Dad Been Telling You, Anyway?
Girl, watching painting: That's a girl, she's got those things. (points to nipples)
Boy: It's a boy! Grown-up boys have those, too. I've seen them.
Girl: It's a girl!
Boy: No, boys have them too; they just don't do as much. The girls' milk, the boys' don't.
Art Gallery
Portland, Oregon
You Must Be Gay, Then
Boy: So, do you have a boyfriend?
Cute, chubby girl, with suspicion: No...
Boy: Can I get your number?
Girl: No.
Boy: Why?
Girl: I'm gay.
Boy: Oh... Really?
Girl: No. Sorry. Creeper reflex.
Boy: So you wanna go out?
Girl: No.
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bonding | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Lies | New York | Offers and requests | Questions | Sexuality | Posted 2010-08-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Don't You Mean "Fabulous"?
Five-year-old boy to mom: Does it feel weird to have a vagina?
Mom: Well, I've had one my whole life, so it feels normal to me.
Five-year-old boy: I wish I knew what it felt like to have one!
Mom: I'm pretty sure you'll be a member of the LGBT community anyway, so maybe you'll find out.
Five-year-old boy: What's LGBT?
Mom: You'll find out soon enough, honey.
Five-year-old boy: That sounds really cool!
Roseville, California
Overheard by: Nature vs Nurture
Competition for Upper Class Twit Of the Year Heats Up
Skinny ginger guy: Oh, don't over-egg the omelet!
Gorgeous girl: Uh... Omelets are mainly made of egg...?
Skinny ginger guy: Just because you wear glasses and go to university you think you're so smart. Well you're not. Because you're a girl! Nerrrrrrrrr!
Nottingham
England
Overheard by: Concerned_citizen
Categories: Comebacks | Education | England | Food | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Skinny people | Posted 2010-08-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
At Least We Have the Alt-world Version
Girl #1: I was so disappointed when I found out Neil Patrick Harris is gay!
Girl #2: I know, right?
Girl #1: It's such a loss for womankind!
Girl #2: Men don't deserve him!
Women's Dressing Room
Western Michigan University
Categories: About celebrities | Colleges & Universities | Gender issues | Girls | Gripes | Michigan | Sexuality | Posted 2010-08-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Homophobos, One Of Mars' Moons, Duh
Girl #1: I'm a carrier for hemophilia.
Girl #2: You're homophobic? That's fucked up!
Girl #1: What the fuck are you talking about?
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: Spencer and Kevin
Categories: Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Insults | Oregon | Posted 2010-07-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why I Stopped Hanging Out with Meatheads.
Straight guy: Why do gay men love boobs but hate vaginas?
Gay guy: Because boobs are pretty and vaginas look like a roast beef sandwich.
Drunk guy: I could so go for Arby's right now.
Huaraz
Peru
Overheard by: Nick
Categories: Beauty | Compare and contrast | Drunks | Food | Gender issues | Guys | Queers | Rack | South America | Vagina | Posted 2010-07-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Also Like All the Men in Troy
Girl #1: I used to shave my armpits before I even had hair, just to feel like a woman. You know?
Girl #2: (nods)
Guelph
Canadia
Categories: Body parts | Canadia | Gender issues | Girls | Hair | Shaving | Posted 2010-07-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
K-Fed: Explained.
Scruffy guy: Shit, I'd suck dick for money. I've always kind of wished I was a girl so I could be a stripper... or a whore.
Gainesville, Florida
You Can't Shame Me Into the Army
College guy: I'm scared!
College girl: Just do it!
College guy: No, I'm scared!
College girl: Be a man!
College guy: I don't wanna!
Salisbury, Maryland
And Landscaping
Attractive girl: Lesbians aren't there for your entertainment.
Young guy: Well, gays aren't there to be your shopping assistants, yet somehow you seem to have pulled that off. I figure we can do the same thing, except instead of shopping, it's sex.
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: veryinterestedin this plan
As Are Balls.
13-year-old boy in black "Rock On" shirt: I want a pink ball. Pink is manly.
Stephens City, Virginia
Overheard by: Tybois
Categories: Fashion | Gender issues | Teens | Virginia | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
From the Brokeback Mountain Outtakes
Guy: Stop accessorizing the tent! You're such a girl!
Old Cedar Campgrounds
Monroeville, New Jersey
Categories: Fashion | Gender issues | Guys | New Jersey | Posted 2010-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I'm a B-Cup, Easy
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I have a bigger penis than you.
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Penis | Teens | Washington | Posted 2010-06-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's More About the Attitude Than the Plumbing
Gay guy to female friend: Just because I have testicles doesn't mean I'm any less of a woman.
Saskatchewan
Canadia
Categories: Balls | Canadia | Compare and contrast | Friends | Gender issues | Queers | Posted 2010-06-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Kind Of Guy Who Takes Women's Studies Classes to Meet Chicks
Women speaking to crowd at rally: We're here to take a stand against violence towards girls and women!
Solo guy in middle of the crowd: Woo! Yeah!
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Can you yell innapropriate?
On the Plus Side, When I Get There, I Can Make Pie!
20-something girl: I am so bad with directions. I can't find my way around anywhere.
20-something guy: That's because you're a woman.
20-something girl: Way to be sexist! (long pause) But yeah, you're probably right.
Cardinal Stritch University
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Sexuality | Wisconsin | Posted 2010-05-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Gosh, You're Such a Luke.
Guy: And then I'll go home and watch Gilmore Girls. (awkward silence) I mean something manly.
London
England
Overheard by: ohdear
Categories: Gender issues | Guys | Sexuality | TV shows | UK | Posted 2010-05-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With Each Revelation, the Female Mystery Only Deepens
Blind old lady to old lady friend: Oh my, you started peeing so fast.
Old lady friend: Yes, it's because I stand up.
Blind old lady: Ohhhh...
Old lady friend: Yes, not a lot of women know how to stand up, you know.
Blind old lady: Yes, that's true. My mother used to stand.
CSULA Women's Bathroom
California
Overheard by: itshahaholly
Categories: California | Disabled | Friends | Gender issues | Old folks | Parenting | Pee | Restroom | Posted 2010-05-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Make-a-Wish Foundation Failed to Return Her Calls
Teenage girl: You know what I wish I had?
Teenage boy, not paying attention: Uh-huh.
Teenage girl: A penis... I'd just go shoving it into people's butts.
Teenage boy: Wait... What?
Teenage girl, whispering to herself: I wish I had a penis.
Bus
Ottawa
Canadia
So I Borrow Them
20-something girl on cell: But yeah, I'm a girl so I don't get a boner.
Kansas
Categories: Gender issues | Girls | Kansas | Sex | Posted 2010-04-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Have You Learned So Little from The Sweetest Thing?
Teen girl in bathroom #1: I'd hate to be a guy and have to use a urinal.
Teen girl in bathroom #2: Oh yeah, that thing looks unsanitary.
Teen girl in bathroom #1: Not even that, but like if you had to go poop then everyone would know it.
Teen girl in bathroom #3: You can't poop in a urinal?
High School
Coral Springs, Florida
Categories: Compare and contrast | Florida | Gender issues | Pee | Poop | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2010-03-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Thinking About Adding a Wallet but I Fear That Might Be Too Frivolous
Lady #1: I usually keep the essentials in my purse.
Lady #2: Well... I keep a toothbrush, vibrator, and pepper spray in mine.
Pennsylvania
Categories: Gender issues | Pennsylvania | Toys | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2010-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When Deejays Moonlight
Big black woman acting as bathroom attendant: Welcome, beautiful ladies, to the best urination station in the nation! A big pee at the Big E! Stall 5 is open! Okay, we've got a full house, so I wanna hear some flushin'! Ma'am, go to numba 2, let it flow through! Pee as comfortably as you can, cause we all know this place was built by a man! The stalls are too small, haha!
Bathroom, Big E Fairgrounds
Springfield, Massachusetts
Categories: Black people | Gender issues | Massachusetts | Pee | Restroom | Posted 2010-03-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wouldn't That Make Her Into a Lesbian?
Teenage girl to friend: I want a boy. If I get a girl I'm going to shove her back in.
New Jersey
Categories: Birthing | Gender issues | New Jersey | Teens | Violence | Posted 2010-02-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's for Church
Four-year-old boy to group of mothers: Guess what!
Group: What?
Four-year-old boy, excited: I just peed standing up!
Boy's father: That's not something we tell people!
Children's Room, Katonah Library
Katonah, New York
Overheard by: amused librarian
Women Have Biological Clocks; Men Have Pop-up Timers
Woman #1: In all seriousness, given the choice, I don't know whether I'd prefer to be male or female.
Woman #2: It'd be really nice not to have cramps.
Woman #1: Yeah, and bleeding in public can be embarrassing, but perhaps less embarrassing than having things "pop up" unexpectedly.
Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Angelica Burns
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Maladies | Penis | Women | Posted 2010-02-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Welcome to the Twilight Zone
30-something guy to seven-year-old kid: So even when you get older you will be spending a lot of time in stores waiting for women to shop... It's boring for us, but looking around and not buying anything is somehow fun for them.
Seven-year-old kid: Oh. You aren't American. Where you from?
30-something guy: I'm from Ireland.
Seven-year-old kid: Ireland? What do they speak there?
30-something guy: English.
Seven-year-old kid: You speak English?
30-something guy: Well, we're speaking English now.
Seven-year-old kid, incredulously: We are?
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Jack
Categories: Foreigners | Gender issues | Kids | Kids | New York | Questions | Shopping | Posted 2010-01-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Few Black Eyes, and They're All, "Wah Wah Wah!"
Female customs and border patrol officer: So I wasn't surprised when he left his wife for his girlfriend, but I was surprised by the domestic battery charge. But... you know how women can be.
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Jan
Categories: Cops | Crimes | Eavesdrop DC | Gender issues | Relationships | Violence | Posted 2010-01-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, It's Not Messy-- It's Calligraphy.
Preppy white boy: You're both women, and you're Asian! How can you have messy handwriting??
Professor: Wait, did I really just hear that?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: The non-asian woman
Categories: Asians | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Indiana | Preppies | Questions | Race | Stupidity | Teachers | Whiteys | Posted 2010-01-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Skinny Jeans Don't Count, Roger.
Guy: Well, it all started during the week that I was cross-dressing...
Leeds
England
Overheard by: Paul
We're Hoping for a Muppet Baby
Middle aged female client: You aren't going to find out the sex? How are you going to know what color to paint the nursery or what kind of baby clothes to get?
Pregnant 30-something hair stylist: Oh, please, like it matters what colors I choose. People aren't going to be wondering if it's a girl or a boy, anyway; they're going to wonder if it's an animal or a baby.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: jenc17
Plus, I Learned to Use a Urinal
Barely legal drunk blonde: Oh my god, I just walked into the guys' washroom. There were guys at the urinals!
Barely legal drunk brunette: It's okay, you were just breaking down gender dichotomies.
Karaoke Bar
Canadia
Overheard by: Tiffany
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bimbettes | Canadia | Drunks | Gender issues | Pee | Sexuality | Posted 2009-12-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Gay Guys Just Criticize Your Outfit
Prof: Ladies, I'm just gonna give it to you straight: I guarantee you that almost every straight guy you see today is going to picture you naked.
Techie guy, fixing projector: Fuckin' A!
University of Calgary
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Education | Gender issues | Sexuality | Students | Teachers | Weirdness | Posted 2009-11-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Googled "Lesbian Triplets" and Got Distracted by Porn
College girl #1: So it turned out that he was one of the lesbian triplets!
College girl #2: No way!
College girl #1: Yeah, the tranny!
College girl #2: Owen? I love Owen! I knew him when he still identified as a girl!
College girl #1: Yeah, and it turned out the midget was trans too.
Hampshire College
Amherst, Massachusetts
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Feelings | Gender issues | Massachusetts | Sexuality | Sorority types | Weirdness | Posted 2009-11-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If They Nag, You Can Shoot 'em
Clerk: I love women. The only thing prettier than a woman is a deer.
Post Office
South Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy
Categories: Animals | Beauty | Compare and contrast | Employees | Gender issues | Post offices | Vermont | Posted 2009-11-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'll Just Slip Into Something More Comfortable
Evolution professor: So why can't humans have more then just two sexes? Man, that'd be a lot of fun, wouldn't it?
Class: (uncontrollable laughter)
Evolution professor: Oh, I can see. (pause) I shouldn't have said anything, let's continue...
UC
Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: I'm glad he said it
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Education | Gender issues | Questions | Sexuality | Students | Teachers | Posted 2009-11-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So You and the Doctors Keep Saying...
Small child entering restroom: Mom, why can't we go to the boys' room? Because I've got a girl with me?
Mom: You are a girl!
Sushi Restaurant
Kansas City, Kansas
Overheard by: zombie z
Categories: Gender issues | Kansas | Kids | Kids | Moms | Parenting | Questions | Restaurants | Restroom | Sexuality | Posted 2009-10-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Only on Thursday Nights.
Old man on phone: I am a beautiful woman.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Categories: Beauty | Canadia | Gender issues | Old folks | On the phone | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2009-10-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You'll Need to Be More Specific.
Woman: Oh, man, I wish I had nuts.
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: Amused Friend
Categories: Balls | Gender issues | Washington | Weirdness | Wishes | Women | Posted 2009-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I Draw the Line at Moving to Seattle
White cube farmer to another: Chicks don't like dudes with umbrellas. They like wild and crazy guys who aren't afraid of getting their hair wet.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: alexis
Categories: Advice | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Hair | Overheard in Minneapolis | Stupidity | Whiteys | Posted 2009-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Dicktatorship?
Professor: So Russia had this really phallus-oriented system of government...
University
Newfoundland
Canadia
Overheard by: Mel
Categories: Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Education | Gender issues | History | Penis | Stupidity | Teachers | Posted 2009-10-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I Just Feel So Comfy in Flannel
Chick: I think that I'm the gayest straight girl in the world.
Bakersfield, California
Categories: California | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Sexuality | Stupidity | Posted 2009-09-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He's the Reason "the Bro" Was Invented
Girl #1: So apparently the hormones are kicking in. He's got boobs now.
Girl #2: Oh, come on! Let's be honest, he's always had boobs.
Carrboro, North Carolina
Categories: Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | North Carolina | Rack | Weirdness | Posted 2009-09-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Child Psychologists Exist
Father, explaining electrical cables to teenage son: Yeah, she's got a transvestite in her wall. But you can convert the tranny back to a female, using the thing in the wall.
Wellington, New Zealand
Overheard by: Jordyn
Categories: Compare and contrast | Dads | Gender issues | New Zealand | Parenting | Science | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-09-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Hate This Country and Its Degenerate Cinema!
Frustrated man with heavy Arabic accent to wife: I got the most chicky-flick movies I could find!
Supermarket
Connecticut
Categories: Compare and contrast | Connecticut | Couples | Gender issues | Movies | Stores | Posted 2009-09-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks to Oregon's No-Fault Dumpster Law
Girl #1: My tampon just fell out when I ran across the street. Great...how's it gonna be when I have a baby?
Girl #2: What? Tampons and babies go in the same place?
Girl #3: Yeah, the garbage disposal.
Girls #1 and #2: What?
Girl #3: I meant the dumpster.
Portland, Oregon
While Girls Are Busy Inserting Tampons
Girl to friends: Of course guys are better at math and science than girls are, they have more time to work on it!
Dining Hall, Harvard University
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: what?
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Education | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | Posted 2009-05-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Could You Leave Me Alone with This for a Few Minutes?
Drunk man to man holding rolled-up newspaper: There's a kind of phallic-ness about it, a sort of masculine quality...
The Ship Inn, Southbank
Brisbane
Australia
Categories: Australia | Compare and contrast | Default | Drunks | Gender issues | Guys | Penis | Posted 2009-05-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Priests Aren't Interested in Me
Sexy blonde: So I was on cross-dresser's wife yesterday.
Okay-looking blonde: What? Where?
Sexy blonde: Cross-dressers wife. Anyway, I was looking for hot cross-dressers to...you know,to...
Okay-looking blonde: I'm not sure I wanna hear the rest, but now I'm morbidly curious. And?
Sexy blonde: I couldn't find any cross-dressers! It was, like, nothing but girls talking about cross-dressing and cross-dressers!
Okay-looking blonde: So? What's wrong with that?
Sexy blonde: A girl's got needs. I can't just get started without cross-dressers. I should sue.
Kansas City, Kansas
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Girls | Kansas | Offers and requests | Questions | Weirdness | Posted 2009-05-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Warning: The Michael Jackson Story May Be Unsuitable for Children
Old man to group of kids: And then it turned into a he-she! (kids gasp)
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: paulyy
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Old folks | Pennsylvania | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2009-05-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...On the Eve Of Our Wedding.
Woman to friend: I don't know what her gender or sexuality is. I just can't believe she'd do that to me.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Freda
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Gripes | San Francisco | Sexuality | Women | Posted 2009-05-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Today on All My Cookies
Teen to friend: I don't care how many time you watch Sesame Street, it is not a soap opera.
Wicklow
Ireland
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Ireland | TV shows | Teens | Posted 2009-05-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Sure I Could Learn to Vacuum in Pearls
20-something girl, to friend: So I was reading in my magazine the other day that only 60% of American women work outside the home. I mean, that is really sad. Why can't I be part of the other 40%?
Appleton, Wisconsin
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Questions | Weirdness | Wisconsin | Posted 2009-03-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How Is a Dorm Room Like a Crime Scene, Alex?
Drunk girl: Oh! So you're not going to go home with your girlfriend when she is asking you and her roommate isn't even home! Oh! Oh! (boyfriend whispers something to her) I don't care if I'm on my period or not!
University of Dayton
Dayton, Ohio
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Drunks | Gender issues | Girls | Ohio | Questions | Relationships | Posted 2009-03-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
History's an Unbroken Chain Of Pushing, Wrestling and Girl-Chasing
Four-year-old girl, showing off scrape on arm: I got that on the playground today when Joey pushed me and I fell!
Mom: Joey should keep his hands to himself. Does your teacher tell him that?
Four-year-old girl, like mom is stupid: Moooooom, he's a boy and that's what boys do! They like to push and wrestle and chase girls!
Mom: Um, that may be true, but it still doesn't make it right.
In Line at Starbucks
Bethesda, Maryland
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Girls | Hands | Kids | Kids | Maryland | Moms | Restaurants | Posted 2009-03-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Before Then, It Was Only Divided Into People Who Make Erroneous Blanket Statements and People Who Do Not
Film studies professor: Until the 1970s, no one realized that the world was divided into men and women.
Birmingham University
England
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Education | England | Gender issues | History | Memory lane | Teachers | Posted 2009-03-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Says the Girl Who Can Shop for 8 Hours Straight in 5-Inch Heels?
Girl trying out for soccer: I don't know what he's thinking making us do all these push-ups. I'm a girl. I am not strong.
UC Santa Barbara
Santa Barbara, California
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Posted 2009-03-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks, Make-a-Wish Foundation!
Drunk girl in bar during Rose Bowl: It's official--I'm going to be ovulating on my wedding day.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Double V
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Default | Drunks | Gender issues | Girls | Illinois | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2009-03-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Always Muted the TV When President Bush Came on
Girl to guy: Do you really not know what a vagina sounds like?
Temple University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Sean Mc
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Pennsylvania | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Years Later, Hillary Clinton Would Regret Not Clicking "Okay"
Girl, looking perplexed at computer screen: Change...gender...?
Phonetics Lab, UC Berkeley
California
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Questions | Weirdness | Posted 2009-03-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
One More Lifetime Movie Marathon Should Do It, Though
Dining hall boy #1: I haven't gotten my period yet.
Dining hall boy #2: Me neither!
University at Buffalo
Buffalo, New York
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Guys | New York | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2009-02-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In Their Jewelry Boxes
Guy: All girls from Minnesota have the same thumbs.
Jerusalem
Israel
Categories: Asia | Body parts | Default | Gender issues | Geography | Guys | Posted 2009-02-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Like Four Different MTV Specials in One!
(two hipsters stare quizzically at short Chinese-American male)
Chinese-American male: No, what's confusing is I'm becoming Mormon and having a sex change.
UC Berkeley
Berkeley, California
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Religion | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2009-02-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Fun Trying, Though
Confused looking girl: It's too bad about that, though.
Disappointed looking girl: Yeah. We can't make Owen pregnant.
University of Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Trying to not to laugh sitting beside them
Categories: Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Names | Weirdness | Posted 2009-02-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Like the Queen Of England Has.
20-something #1: Let's get into publishing.
20-something #2: Only if it's porn.
20-something #1: Well, of course.
20-something #2: For women. Graphic pornography for women.
20-something #1: I think they already have that.
20-something #2: Giant diamond encrusted wangs, artfully displayed on wedgewood.
Denver, Colorado
Categories: Colorado | Coworkers | Default | Fashion | Gender issues | Guys | Jobs & Careers | Porn | Posted 2009-02-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's What You Said About Hannah Montana!
Man coming out of feminist art retrospective: So, what did you think of the show?
Woman: Not enough menstrual blood.
Vancouver Art Gallery
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: I would have to agree
The Two Types of Feminists, Encapsulated
Female student #1: I think Picasso painted them as nudes to liberate women; to show that they're human beings.
Female student #2: I think he just liked tits.
French Class
UMass, Amherst
Categories: Class | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | Nipples | Philosophy | Students | Posted 2008-12-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And They're Great Shade on a Sunny Day
Skinny guy: I like the big girls because they're cleaner, and they buy you drinks.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: joe joe.
Categories: Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Drinking & drunks | Gender issues | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Overheard in PDX | Skinny people | Posted 2008-12-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Would You Say It While Brandishing a Riding Crop?
35-year-old man: Do you know what I did for you? I left my home, my wife. I cheated because I was cheated on, I know what that's like. You're turning 30, you need a man, what's a woman at 30? You're alone!
28-year-old woman: You're having a midlife crisis. Women don't get those. I'm there for you, like, "you should stop at three drinks because you're a terrible drunk."
35-year-old man: You'd do that for me?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Matt
Categories: Age and ageing | Default | Drinking & drunks | Feelings | Gender issues | Guys | Illinois | Infidelity | Offers and requests | Questions | Relationships | Women | Posted 2008-12-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wait 'Til She Realizes Drag Queens Have Better Legs Than She Does
20-something girl #1: Did you hear Dan and Jack are getting married?
20-something girl #2: But they're guys.
20-something girl #1: Yeah... guys who fell in love in college, have been together eight years, have never broken up once, and Dan proposed while they were in Paris.
20-something girl #2: Bitches! They stole my dream! See, this is why feminism sucks.
Silver Spring, Maryland
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Girls | Gripes | Maryland | Philosophy | Questions | Relationships | Sexuality | Posted 2008-12-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When the Legal Limit Is More Like 75
Woman exiting ladies' bathroom: It smells like a hundred men showered in there!
Humboldt
Saskatchewan
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Restroom | Sensory experiences | Women | Posted 2008-12-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
No
Happy hour drinker: My menstruation looks like meat. Is that normal?
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: no, good heavens no!
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Drunks | Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Questions | Weirdness | Posted 2008-12-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ah, the Great American Pastime
Young man: Female curling is awesome to watch with your eyes closed.
Hoover, Alabama
Overheard by: tony jones
Categories: Alabama | Default | Feelings | Gender issues | Guys | Sensory experiences | Posted 2008-12-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Next Altoona Will Give Women the Right to Vote
(in a philosophy class, the subject of "lovemaking vs. fucking" is being discussed)
Angry feminist student: Guys have it so easy! You can go out and fuck any girl you want and no one thinks any worse of you, but if a girl sleeps around she's a slut! Hell, if you somehow don't manage to nail the girl, you can just go home and masturbate. Girl's can't do that!
Female student who hadn't spoken a word all class: Pff, yes we can!
Penn State
Altoona, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: A guy in the same class
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Masturbation | Pennsylvania | Sexuality | Students | Posted 2008-12-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She Was Just Fucking with Him--She's Actually a Figure Skater
Girl, giving tour: Here is my favorite, one of our the weight training rooms.
Guy on tour with Australian accent: Do you train here as well?
Girl: Yes, this is my event.
Guy: What? Weightlifting?
Girl: Yeah. I'm training for the snatch.
Guy: What?
Girl: It goes like this. (demonstrates weight lifting move)
Guy (not suppressing grin): And how much is your snatch?
Girl: I start with 83 pounds.
Guy (snickering): Reeeally...
Girl: Yep. Also the clean and jerk.
Guy: (leaves tour group, unable to suppress laughter)
US Olympic Training Center
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: TK
Categories: Colorado | Default | Foreigners | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Questions | Weirdness | Posted 2008-12-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In My Day, We Made Do with Electric Toothbrushes and Washing Machines
Woman #1: So, all these women are going skydiving now, because you can have an orgasm against the updraft.
Woman #2 (enthusiastically): Oh, that's great!
Olympic Sculpture Garden
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Default | Feelings | Gender issues | Orgasm | Washington | Women | Posted 2008-12-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And You Said I Could Have Whatever I Wanted for My Bar Mitzvah
Teenage boy to father: I've been talking to a Thai lady on the internet and, I'll bring her to New Zealand for only $50,000!
Father: Is she genuine?
Teenage boy: Genuine Thai lady-boy!
Auckland
New Zealand
Overheard by: Tessa
Categories: Dads | Default | Gender issues | Geography | Guys | Internet | Money | New Zealand | Offers and requests | Questions | Sexuality | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2008-11-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A New Direction in Québec's Quest for Independence
Man: And there were women dressed as men who looked like little Japanese girls playing video games!
Boston Pizza, Toronto
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Clothes | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Restaurants | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2008-11-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Listen Up, Ladies
Male British literature prof: Today, Alexander Pope and I are going to tell you what it's like to be a woman.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Overheard by: reb
Hey, You Try to Negotiate the Aisles While Applying Eyeliner
Female flight attendant (managing to bump beverage cart into a seat): Whoops, sorry! Woman driver!
Flight over Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Gaby Young
Categories: Default | Etiquette | Flight attendants | Gender issues | Hawaii | Women | Posted 2008-11-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Same Issue Carmen Electra Has Every Saturday Night
Professor about poem A Wife's Lament: The real issue we are dealing with with this woman is how many guys are involved and in what kinds of positions.
Univsersity of Colorado, Denver
His Parents Banked on the Inadequacies of American Sex Ed
Overweight mom with toddler: Then he found out he was a hermaphrodite, a boy cursed with the body of a woman. He grew up never knowing...never knowing a thing.
Overweight friend: Wouldn't ya know?
Seattle's Best Coffee
Phoenix, Arizona
Overheard by: All You Can Eat
Categories: Arizona | Default | Fat people | Friends | Gender issues | Moms | Questions | Restaurants | Sexuality | Posted 2008-11-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Well, Not No Reason--I've Met Your Kids
Man #1: So I got it, and then a month later my wife found out she's in menopause. So I got it for no reason.
Man #2: Damn.
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Washington | Posted 2008-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hard to Imagine You Two Have Time to Read
(40-something man was hitting on young clerk when his wife comes up)
Man: I honestly think man wasn't meant to be faithful. We're all so sexual.
Wife: Did you forget I was here?
Man: I'll be in the car in a second.
(she leaves store)
Man, after looking back at clerk: Please. She loves getting pimped out to my friends.
Bookstore
Ocala, Florida
Categories: Books | Compare and contrast | Couples | Default | Feelings | Florida | Gender issues | Guys | Infidelity | Questions | Sexuality | Stores | Women | Posted 2008-11-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Do I Question the Priest in Church?
Husband: How can women spend so much money on purses?
Wife: Shhh!
Coach Store
Pennsylvania
Categories: Couples | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Money | Pennsylvania | Questions | Stores | Women | Posted 2008-10-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Girls Beat the Shit Out of Him After Class
AP English teacher: Can anyone tell me what feminine rhyme is?
Guy in class: Um, rhyme that's not very good?
Winona Senior High School
Winona, Minnesota
Overheard by: Stephanie Miene
Categories: Default | Education | Gender issues | Guys | Minnesota | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Students | Teachers | Posted 2008-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Have Further Interest, You Can Sign Up for My Pubic History Class This Spring
Professor, discussing an 18th century painting: Now, it is important to remember that at this time women did not wear panties. This is a beaver shot par excellence!
San José State University
California
Categories: California | Class | Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | History | Teachers | Posted 2008-10-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Except Target Shooters in Vegas
Woman: Well, I still think I should be allowed to join the army if I want to.
Man: Oh yeah, you totally should. I'm just saying, I don't think women should go to *war*. I mean, no one wants to see, like, boobs getting shot at.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Megan
Categories: Body parts | Canadia | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Violence | Women | Posted 2008-10-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Gotta Love Those Progressive Europeans
Teacher: So, women are in fact always...what?
Student: Wrong?
Classroom
Denmark
Overheard by: Allan Loff Jakobsen
Perhaps the Little Beret Was a Poor Idea?
Girl #1: Yeah, so, my vagina keeps talking to me.
Girl #2: Really? What does it say?
Girl #1: I don't know--it keeps speaking French.
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by: just trying to get a muffin
Categories: Default | Friends | Gender issues | Girls | Language barrier | Overheard at McGill | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Now the Cheese Stands Alone
Girl on cell: 'cause I kinda cut off my balls...
Boston Common
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: she didn't look trannyish
Categories: Body parts | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | On the phone | Posted 2008-10-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Give Honey, I Shrunk Liberace! Two Thumbs Up
Middle schooler: There's a gay singer in my bra! There's a gay singer in my bra!
Muirlands Middle
La Jolla, California
Categories: California | Clothes | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Music | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Students | Tweens | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Dunno What All the Fuss Is About
Random old guy: I've been pregnant for 12 months.
Paramus, New Jersey
Overheard by: Russ
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Guys | New Jersey | Old folks | Pregnancy | Time Management | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Ovulating or Desperate?"--The New Party Game That's Sweeping the Nation!
Young professional girl: He's cute. But then again, lately I think every guy is cute.
Friend: Are you ovulating?
Young professional girl: No. I think I'm just desperate.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Sigh. Me too.
Categories: Beauty | Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Feelings | Friends | Gender issues | Girls | Overheard in Minneapolis | Sexuality | Posted 2008-10-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...at Scrabble?
Girl #1: So, if your boyfriend kisses another guy, is that counted as cheating?
Girl #2: Uhhh... What?
New Zealand
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Girls | Infidelity | New Zealand | Questions | Relationships | Sexuality | Posted 2008-10-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Do You Not Have the Balls?
Teenage boy surrounded by girls: So, do you guys play the penis game?
(awkward silence)
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: no, I don't
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Guys | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Sexuality | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2008-09-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Remember How I Won That Pie-Eating Contest?
Chick: If I were a lesbian, I'd be really good at it.
Campsite, Southern Utah
Overheard by: Lauren
Categories: Compliments | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Sexuality | Utah | Posted 2008-09-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Nobody Knew Pig-Pen Was a Girl 'til She Grew Up
Middle-aged man to 20-something bookseller: You've got that sort of hair that men love to mess up...
Lexington, Kentucky
Overheard by: envious
When You Abducted That Thong It Was Like You Ripped Out My Very Soul
20-something crying girl: You. Don't. Get. It. I bleed Victoria's Secret.
Duff's Wings
Buffalo, New York
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Girls | New York | Restaurants | Undies | Posted 2008-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I'm Half Gay So It's Acceptable, Right?
Extremely effeminate boy (taking deep breath): So...I think I am bi. (flips hair)
Blonde girl (flipping page in magazine, sounding bored): Hmmm. Are you?
Extremely effeminate boy: Yes! (flips hair) I am bi!
Blonde girl: Well, duh. You never stop checking out other guys!
Extremely effeminate boy: I'm not gay, though. My mom thought I was gay.
Blonde girl: I know you're not gay. (pause) For one thing, you are looking at my boobs right now.
Extremely effeminate boy: Oh. Right.
Blonde girl: You feel like stopping?
Extremely effeminate boy: ...not particularly.
Washington Square Park
New York City, New York
Categories: Bi-curious | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | New York | Nipples | Questions | Sexuality | Posted 2008-09-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Think We Could Get That Classified As a Learning Disorder?
Guy #1: Sometimes it's hard being a guy.
Guy #2: Why is that?
Guy #1: Well, I try to stay focused and get shit done, but every time a female walks by I feel obligated to turn around and check out her tits and ass. I just want to get through a project without being distracted by tits and ass.
Guy #2: Yeah, but don't you worry you might miss the world's greatest tits and ass?
Guy #1: Exactly!
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: sean
Categories: Beauty | Body parts | Colorado | Default | Fears | Gender issues | Gripes | Guys | Questions | Posted 2008-09-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Hire a Tampon-Charmer to Make It Dance
Guy #1: I always wanted to open the door wearing nothing but a t-shirt and socks.
Girl #1 (pondering): I think that would be truly amazing. I don't know what would be more shocking, the penis or the socks. Probably the socks.
Girl #2: I guess I could do that next time you guys come over... Just (gesticulates around body) shirt and socks.
Guy #2: Naah. It wouldn't be that great, you not having a penis and all.
Girl #2: Oh, I guess I could wear a tampon! (puts finger in front of crotch and makes a "snakey" motion)
House Party
Pinheiros, Sao Paulo
Brazil
Made HimThink Twice About Becoming a Woman
Woman #1: My boss shaves his legs.
Woman #2: Really?
Woman #1: His legs, his back, his chest, everything. All guys do it now.
Woman #2: That's so weird. My son asked me to wax his chest because he said girls don't like hairy chests.
Woman #1: How much hair could a 14-year-old have?
Woman #2: Actually, a lot.
Woman #1: He's going to be really hairy when he's older.
Woman #2: Fortunately not on his back yet. So anyway--don't tell anybody I told you this. You're sworn to secrecy--I told him I wouldn't wax him, but I went out and bought some Nair and put it on him, and it worked. But the next morning, he was in such pain--his chest was all inflamed. He said he would never do it again.
Women's Gym
Studio City, California
Overheard by: I always eavesdrop on these two
Categories: Age and ageing | California | Default | Gender issues | Hair | Sensory experiences | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2008-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Girls But Were Afraid to Ask
Teen girl #1: Ugh, I get so gassy when I'm on my rag.
Teen girl #2: I'm just gassy all the time!
Teen girl #1: Ugh, I know.
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Gripes | Sensory experiences | Teens | Posted 2008-08-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Fuck Imitation, Rape Is the Sincerest Form of Flattery
Brother: How come mom drives all the way to the mall to get you but I have to take the bus home?
Sister: I don't know, I guess she thinks it isn't safe.
Brother: Oh yeah, I forgot girls are helpless.
Sister: Uh, probably because I'm more likely to get raped and beaten!
Brother: Ooooh, look at miss popular.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Gender issues | Gripes | Parenting | Pennsylvania | Siblings | Posted 2008-08-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Take Your Side Ponytail With You
Drunk (just thrown out): I bet if had really big boobs you'd let me back in.
Cop working security for the club: No, actually we wouldn't.
Drunk: What, you don't like big boobs?
Cop: Not on dudes.
Drunk: Huh? No, I mean if I was a chick.
Cop: You'd make a really ugly chick.
Drunk: Huh?
Cop: Get the fuck out of here.
Nightclub
Scottsdale, Arizona
Categories: Arizona | Bars & Clubs | Beauty | Cops | Default | Drunks | Gender issues | Rack | Posted 2008-08-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Game, Set, Match
Flat-chested girl (grabbing box of energy bars): Here, get some of these for tomorrow.
Guy: I don't know. Um... it says here that they're for girls.
Flat-chested girl: Yeah, let's get them.
Guy: But... Huh, well, haha, they're not going to make me grow tits, are they?
Flat-chested girl, staring: Hasn't worked for me.
Guy (putting box in carriage): Hm-mmm.
Safeway
Colorado Springs, Colorado
They're Instant YouTube Celebrities
Little boy (chanting loudly): My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt, butt, butt, butt, butt!
Little girl: But I don't have a penis.
Both: My vagina and my butt! My vagina and my butt...
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: Kelly
That Photo of the Kitten in the Shoe Was Oddly Arousing, Though
Drunk girl #1: That's the first men's bathroom I've ever been in that didn't have porn mags!
Drunk girl #2: Not ones that you could see!
Lincoln, Nebraska
Abstinence Hip Hop Fails to Find Its Audience
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I don't need one.
Slutty chick: STDs!
Sluttier chick: I'm on my period, yo!
University of Connecticut
Overheard by: Unwilling Audience
Categories: Chicks | Colleges & Universities | Connecticut | Default | Gender issues | Health & Hygiene | STDs | Stupidity | Posted 2008-07-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Seems Like It's Every Freaking Month
Girl: Oh, and guess what else happened?
Boyfriend: What?
Girl: I got my period again! What the hell?!
Eaton Centre, Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Compounded by My Inability to Tell Hot from Cold, It's a Logistical Nightmare
Guy: Leggings are fucking up everything. I used to know when it was winter because girls would stop wearing skirts, but now thanks to leggings they can wear them all year. It's bullshit.
Connecticut College
Categories: Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Connecticut | Default | Gender issues | Gripes | Guys | Posted 2008-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ooh, Stool Softener--Perfect!
Middle-aged matronly looking woman: Well, while we're here I can get some of this stocking stuffer shit.
Walgreens
Chicago, Illinois
Then It's All: "Nyuk Nyuk Nyuk--Got Yer Boobie!"
College girl #1: You laugh a lot during sex, then?
College girl #2: I think you have to laugh during sex. Otherwise it's too solemn. I mean, sex is like: "Oh yeah, oh yeah, queef."
Chinese Restaurant
Columbus, Mississippi
Overheard by: Megan S.
Categories: Default | Feelings | Gender issues | Girls | Mississippi | Restaurants | Sex | Yeahhh, college! | Posted 2008-07-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Comfortable Strapless Bras Are in a Storage Locker Somewhere in New Mexico, with the Water-Powered Car
Prudish-looking woman #1: It's a bra conspiracy.
Prudish-looking woman #2: I agree.
Coles Supermarket
Melbourne
Australia
Categories: Australia | Clothes | Default | Gender issues | Women | Posted 2008-07-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Female Equivalent Of, "Do You Have Any Balls?"
Ghetto chick screaming at other: Do you deserve your ovaries? I parked your car for you, bitch!
Porter Square
Somerville, Massachusetts
Overheard by: well, do you?
Categories: Chicks | Default | Gender issues | Insults | Massachusetts | Uterus | Posted 2008-07-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Orgasm-Faking Deceivers, the Lot of You!
Professor, during a discussion about Lear's daughters in King Lear: well, don't you guys ever lie?
(class stays silent)
Professor: You all lie, especially the girls.
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Class | Colleges & Universities | Default | Education | Gender issues | Lies | Questions | Teachers | Posted 2008-07-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That, and World Peace
Guy (joyous): I want to stay in college forever!
Girl (ecstatic): I want to put in a new tampon!
www.overheardatyale.com
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Education | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Overheard at Yale | Stupidity | Wishes | Posted 2008-07-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What About "Sunday, Bloody Sunday"?
College girl, while listening to Hang Me Out To Dry: Dude, I just pictured my tampon singing this song!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: a. Lil
Categories: Default | Gender issues | Overheard in Minneapolis | Singing | Sorority types | Weirdness | Posted 2008-06-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Especially with This Little Pink Bow
Three-year-old boy to grandfather: Do you have a penis?
Grandfather: Yes, I do.
Boy: I have a penis, too. My penis is small. My penis is cute.
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Vejewsbian
If It Could Happen to Lance Armstrong, It Could Happen to Anybody!
Girl #1: I'm all freaked out now! I bet you she's pregnant! My sister's pregnant!
Girl #2: I'm sure she's not pregnant, you're assuming the worst.
Girl #1: Oh my god! What if she has testicle cancer?!
Adelaide
Australia
Overheard by: monkey
Competing on Any Reality Show, in a Nutshell
Guy: It's like playing hopscotch with your shirt off and the little kids are like: "Mommy, look at his boobies!" and I'm like: "Yeah. Look at my boobies."
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: well that's neat
Categories: Default | Diet & weight | Fat people | Gender issues | Guys | Kids | Nipples | Overheard in Minneapolis | Posted 2008-06-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Usually Have Pretty Cool Stereo Equipment
Customer: My therapist wants me to start thinking of men as friends. Seriously though, if you can't fuck'em, what's the point?
Espresso Drive Thru
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: The Barista Who Loves Her Job
Categories: Advice | Creepsters | Customers | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Mental illnesses | Questions | Restaurants | Sexuality | Washington | Posted 2008-06-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Except for Women's Professional Basketball
Professor: How does female humor differ from that of males?
Student: Women don't have the luxury to be funny.
Stanford, California
Overheard by: fliushkin
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Questions | Teachers | Posted 2008-06-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which Is Why Men Wear Pink Shirts
Professor: Ever wonder why pink is considered a girl color?
Student: Because vaginas are pink.
UC
Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Kelly
Categories: California | Class | Default | Education | Gender issues | Questions | Students | Teachers | Vagina | Posted 2008-06-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Hard to Be Sure, but I Think I Won
College girl: And then she got all high and mighty about it. She was like: "Remember when you passed out in my bathroom? I do!" And I was like: "Remember when you were born and looked like a man? I do!"
Marist College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Overheard by: Russ
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Insults | Kids | New York | Sorority types | Posted 2008-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With the Possible Exception of the Dominant Chord
Professor: So, how was survey of western music?
Girl: It was terrible: someone would always find a way to bring up gender issues. I mean, I hate to break it to you, but eighteenth century tonal music doesn't give a shit about your vagina.
Sarah Lawrence College
Bronxville, New York
Why Gay Best Friends Were Invented
[Two 20-something guys are staring at Colleen Moore's ornate fairy castle dollhouse.]
Guy #1: Oh, man.
Guy #2: No man on earth could have ever kept this woman happy.
Museum of Science and Industry
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Joan
Categories: About celebrities | Default | Friends | Gender issues | Guys | Happiness | Illinois | Toys | Posted 2008-06-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Just Because You Seem Unable to Get Dishes Really Clean
Girl to friend, walking from their car: Jesus, Amber, nobody thinks you have a penis.
Nashville, Tennessee
Usually by Their Owners
Woman on street: Dicks are overrated!
Brunswick Street
Fitzroy
Australia
You Never Did That When We Were Together, Either
Young guy on cell: You got a bikini wax?... Really?... How come you never did that when we were together?... Oh, so you're a woman now?
7-Eleven
Edmonton, Alberta
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Default | Gender issues | Guys | Hair | On the phone | Questions | Relationships | Sexuality | Stores | Weirdness | Posted 2008-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Blame the Lasciviousness of Contemporary Mores
Middle school student: It's not my fault he got hit with the G-string...
Toms River
New Jersey
Overheard by: the sub
Categories: Balls | Clothes | Gender issues | New Jersey | Students | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2008-05-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Feel the Magma Flowing Beneath Their Placid Surface
Mother to daughter, regarding t-shirts: We need to get you a big one 'cause your boobs are growing way too fast.
Flat-chested daughter: Yeah, I know.
Hollywood Tower of Terror Shop
Disneyland, California
Categories: Body parts | California | Clothes | Compare and contrast | Compliments | Gender issues | Girls | Moms | Teens | Tourist attractions | Posted 2008-05-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yeah, Technically 'Martians' and 'Venusians'
Guy in sociology class: So male and female... Are those races?
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: doug
Categories: Class | Education | Gender issues | Guys | Overheard at Cornell | Questions | Race | Students | Stupidity | Posted 2008-05-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Really Shouldn't Discriminate Against People Who Try to Kill You
Jewish man: I am not sexist!
Jewish man's friend: You are so sexist Archie Bunker is embarrassed.
Jewish man: I'm not sexist. I'll stab a chick in her junk!
Israeli Martial Arts Class
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Ari
Categories: Class | Compare and contrast | Friends | Gender issues | Jews | Missouri | TV shows | Vagina | Violence | Weirdness | Posted 2008-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I Need Lipstick for Medicinal Purposes
College girl, handing heavy basket to boyfriend: I'm all for feminism, but I don't like carrying heavy things.
Target
Towson, Maryland
Overheard by: Kay-ren
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Girls | Maryland | Offers and requests | Philosophy | Sorority types | Stores | Posted 2008-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Material Boy Though I Am
Male professor: I'm sorry, I just can't sing "Some boys kiss me". I know that's desperately heteronormative, but I can't help it!
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Categories: Connecticut | Feelings | Gender issues | Guys | Music | Sexuality | Singing | Teachers | Posted 2008-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Girls Suffer Most from the British Class System
Girl #1: All they talked about was fannies... And tits... And... Fuckin'... Something else.
Girl #2: Rugby.
Girl #1: Yeah. Rugby.
Warwick
England
She Produced Sitcom Pilots in the 80s
Blonde: I wish I was a dad. It would be so funny!
Wellington
New Zealand
Overheard by: Sars
Categories: Compare and contrast | Family ties | Gender issues | Girls | New Zealand | Wishes | Posted 2008-05-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Don't Worry --It Was Completely Consensual
Adult woman to girlfriend's six-year-old daughter: Oh honey! You got your knees all skinned up with boo boos! What happened?
Six-year-old girl, shrugging: Oh, you know... Boys.
South 4th St
Louisville , Kentucky
Categories: Body parts | Euphemisms | Gender issues | Girls | Kentucky | Kids | Kids | Questions | Violence | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2008-05-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ha Ha, Dude Watches Oprah!
Girl: My history teacher says women are more evolved than men.
Biology teacher: And what evidence does she base this on?
Guy: Oprah?
La Follette High
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Tangent
Categories: About celebrities | Compare and contrast | Education | Gender issues | Girls | Guys | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Science | Students | Teachers | Wisconsin | Posted 2008-05-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sternum, Scrotum: Scranton
Girl #1: Owww, my sternum hurts. Wait...I have one of those, right?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Don't only boys have sternums?
[pause]
Girl #3: I think you're thinking of scrotum...
University of Scranton
Scranton, Pennsylvania
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Gender issues | Girls | Maladies | Pennsylvania | Questions | Stupidity | Words | Posted 2008-05-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Thought Only Americans Knew This Little About Sex Ed.
[Line for ladies' room]
Girl #1: Hi, do you mind if I cut in front of you? It's urgent.
Girl #2: Sure.
Girl #1: Thanks, I have to change my tampon.
Girl #2: [Blank stare.]
Girl #1: I have to make sure I change it often. Not too often, because once I changed it too much and got chlamydia.
Girl #2: Oh...[Suppresses laugh.]
Western Australia
Australia
Categories: Australia | Cleanliness | Compare and contrast | Crazies | Etiquette | Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Restroom | STDs | Threats | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-04-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Instead I Politely Smell Your Crotch
Middle school chick: Sir, are you married?
Substitute teacher: That's a very personal question. That's like if I asked you, "Has it started yet?"
Terman Middle School
Palo Alto, California
Overheard by: heerothewizard
Categories: California | Chicks | Comebacks | Education | Etiquette | Gender issues | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Questions | Relationships | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teachers | Tweens | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Looked Like He Might Be Manorexic
Teen girl on cell: I saw this guy with a man tramp stamp... A mamp stamp.
Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: sadie
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | On the phone | Tattoos | Teens | Train | Words | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Really the Only Way to Be Safe in a Manhole
Construction worker yelling into manhole: As a matter of fact, I'm wearing a condom right now! Really! I put one on this morning.
10th and Pine
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Didn't want to know
Categories: Condoms | Construction workers | Gender issues | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Pennsylvania | Threats | Weirdness | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
2008: Microsoft Pilots MS Office Assistant, "Buzzy the Dildo"
Guy: You know when you do a "Find File" in Windows? Yeah. I want to kill the little animated dog... It bothers me.
Girl: Hahaha... Yeah. It's better than the paperclip.
Guy: Meh... Only because he doesn't pop up unexpectedly. Clippy was kind of cool if he weren't in the way.
Girl: Thats what he wants you to think! He makes you feel bad for hating him!
Guy: Why this makes me want to have an animated kitten running around my desktop, I don't know. I used to have such a program.
Girl: I had a stripper on my laptop. She danced and stripped whenever music came on.
Guy: You're such a closet nympho.
Girl: Yeah. For my dreams class, we have to write all our dreams down and share them with the class. Last night I dreamt I was trekking through a jungle in gold prada heels to find my doctor to get an HIV test. I'm not sure I want the class psychoanalyzing that one.
Portland, Maine
Categories: Bimbettes | Clothing | Friends | Gender issues |