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What Do You Think the Midget with the Butterfly Net Is For?
Loud, obnoxious, pregnant girl in a skirt: I'm not wearing any underwear.
Friend, sarcastically: Aren't you afraid your baby's going to fall out or something?
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: what not to expect when you're expecting
It Doesn't Come Up Much, but a Rule Is a Rule
Student: Yeah... I don't really take advice from a kid wearing a winter hat indoors, drinking white grape juice out of a measuring cup.
SUNY Cortland
Cortland, New York
Categories: Advice | Clothing | Colleges & Universities | Default | Drinking & drunks | New York | Students | Weirdness | Posted 2008-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Daphne, Velma and the Gang Were Really Up to in That Van
Kid with lisp: Let's investigate some underwear!
Fairwood, Washington
Overheard by: that won't be in the children's section...
As Explained in Survival of the Tittiest
Girl #1: This dress makes me look like a pregnant woman with small boobs.
Girl #2: Pregnant women can't have small boobs. That's like impossible. It's, like, natural selection or something.
Boston University
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rebecca
Categories: Clothing | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Massachusetts | Nipples | Pregnancy | Science | Posted 2008-06-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Not a Real Green Dress --That's Cruel
Girl on phone: I'll go on MySpace and look until I die for a picture of you in a ugly green dress!
Orlando Ale House
Orlando, Florida
Categories: Clothing | Florida | Girls | MySpace | On the phone | Restaurants | Threats | Posted 2008-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Is Hard To Come Across Jeans Already Faded
Guy watching Macy's commercial: Ugh! This American obsession with consumerism is just disgusting! Not to mention flawed.
Sarcastic girl: What the hell do you think you are, Mr. Abercrombie jeans? Jamaican?
Western Washington University
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: He was obviously a freshman
Categories: Clothing | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Geography | Guys | Names | Pop culture | Questions | Washington | Words | Posted 2008-05-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which, for Some Reason, Makes Me All Tingly Inside
Woman #1: That's a wonderful coat.
Woman #2: I hope it stays cold long enough for me to enjoy it.
Woman #1: You know, you're really brave. I have a fur at home but I can't stop thinking about those crazy PETA people chasing me down with a van and hurting me.
Sidewalk in front of Grocery Store
Maryland
Oh Honey, a Sorority Girl Doesn't Need a Personality
Sorority girl #1: I should, like, just wear mini skirts all the time.
Sorority girl #2: Why?
Sorority girl #1: I have great legs, they're my best asset. [quiet pause] But I don't like my personality.
Dressing Room at Buffalo Exchange
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Yes! She just redeemed herself
Categories: Beauty | Body parts | Clothing | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Feelings | Friends | Girls | Sorority types | Texas | Posted 2008-05-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
2008: Microsoft Pilots MS Office Assistant, "Buzzy the Dildo"
Guy: You know when you do a "Find File" in Windows? Yeah. I want to kill the little animated dog... It bothers me.
Girl: Hahaha... Yeah. It's better than the paperclip.
Guy: Meh... Only because he doesn't pop up unexpectedly. Clippy was kind of cool if he weren't in the way.
Girl: Thats what he wants you to think! He makes you feel bad for hating him!
Guy: Why this makes me want to have an animated kitten running around my desktop, I don't know. I used to have such a program.
Girl: I had a stripper on my laptop. She danced and stripped whenever music came on.
Guy: You're such a closet nympho.
Girl: Yeah. For my dreams class, we have to write all our dreams down and share them with the class. Last night I dreamt I was trekking through a jungle in gold prada heels to find my doctor to get an HIV test. I'm not sure I want the class psychoanalyzing that one.
Portland, Maine
Then Turn Them into a Headband for Church
Ghetto woman #1: Oooh, I like them shorts.
Ghetto woman #2: I know, girl. My buttcheeks hang all out in them. I'm going to wear them to the club and find me a good man.
Wet Seal
Bradenton, Florida
Overheard by: Rae Crider
Categories: Black people | Bragging | Clothing | Compliments | Default | Florida | Women | Posted 2008-04-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Stand Out from Your Husband's Other Wives
Mother: That dress is cheap -- cheap like the cigarette cartoons in my mother's freezer.
Daughter: It's prom. You're supposed to look cheap.
Salt Lake City, Utah
I Expect to Awaken Tomorrow Nauseated, Infected
Tipsy girl: You know what type of night it is? I'm wearing a leopard-print dress and leggings! It's that type of night!
Shout-out: www.overheardatlc.blogspot.com
One Day He Will Write Lyrics for Christina Aguilera
Dad in locker room, to son: Jake, take your pants off.
Five-year-old son, singing: Take your pants off, do the ducky-ducky.
Dad: Jake!
Five-year-old son: Take your pants off, do the something-something.
Newport Athletic Club
Middletown, Rhode Island
Feared I Might Inadvertently Become a Lesbian
Girl #1: I know for a fact this year is going to be way better than last year.
Girl #2: Why's that?
Girl #1: Because this year I actually have designer clothes. Last year I didn?t have any, and I was so unhappy!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Canadia | Clothing | Compliments | Default | Girls | Idiots | Overheard at McGill | Students | Posted 2008-03-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The True Test of Whether You Should Be Wearing Skinny Jeans
Hipster girl: Ugh, I had, like, the worst day yesterday. I was skipping on the quad, and I ripped my skinny jeans.
Vassar College
Poughkeepsie, New York
I'm Sorry, Miss, but His Holiness Can't Take Your Call
Excited girl on cell: So, I'm sorry to wake you, but do you still wear those crazy socks? Or do you only wear white ones?
K-Mart
North Carolina
Categories: Clothing | North Carolina | On the phone | Questions | Posted 2008-02-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Are You Banging Your Head on That Counter?
Disappointed wife: Hi. I'd like to exchange these really nice-colored dress shirts for these really boring dress shirts. I had my husband try on the lilac, and it looked great. He said he would never wear it because it made him look gay. I said, 'First of all, you'll never be attractive enough to pass for a gay man...!'
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Express Customer
Categories: Clothing | Gripes | Massachusetts | Women | Posted 2008-02-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Reams of Fun
Guy: My idea of fun is wearing a paper skirt!
Cupertino High School
Cupertino, California
Overheard by: shy invisible girl
Categories: California | Clothing | Guys | Happiness | Posted 2008-01-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And They'll Feel Comfortable in Me
20-ish girl: I suppose, but only if I can dress like a whore. That way, I'll feel comfortable in my surroundings.
Disney World
Florida
You Can Wear It with the John Lovitz Flats
Woman modeling outfit from fitting room: What do you think?
Husband: That outfit makes you look like Garry Shandling!
Ann Taylor, Cherry Creek Mall
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: lauren
And I'm Sorry, Okay?
Conductor over loudspeaker: Diana, I have your clothes... Diana, the head conductor has your clothes.
MBTA Commuter Rail
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Clothing | Conductors | Massachusetts | Posted 2007-12-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Even Hallucinations Need Veterinary Care
Hobo holding up stuffed glove: ... And now the mitten is having babies... And the liquid is starting to come out...
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: Karrie
It's Like Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boob!
College girl: My bra -- it's, like, magical! It mysteriously unclips itself throughout the day!
Fairfield University
Fairfield, Connecticut
Overheard by: GladMyBraIsntMagical..
Categories: Bimbettes | Clothing | Connecticut | Magic | Posted 2007-10-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Still Tasting Yesterday's
Crazy bag lady: Can I have that shirt? I'm all dirty and nasty.
Young guy: No, I need this for work.
Crazy bag lady: Oh. Can I shit in your mouth?
Young guy: Um, no.
Washington, DC
Categories: Bag ladies | Clothing | Poop | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-10-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Perfect for Showcasing Your Upper-Arm Bruises
Little girl: What do you think, Mommy?
Overenthusiastic mom: That's a cute little wife beater!
Target
Fayetteville, Arizona
Overheard by: D00M5D4YCH1CK3N
What Did You Expect Your Dentist to Do?
Hoochie: I strategically wore a skirt and he didn't even try anything!
West Campus
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Molly
Also Why the Germans Lost Two Wars
Young suit: I need to get a new BlackBerry. I dropped my old one in a urinal. Well, I was wearing lederhosen, and they don't have pockets.
San Jose Airport
California
Overheard by: Keren
Categories: Airports & flights | California | Clothing | Suits | Posted 2007-09-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When It's Really More of a Truce
Lady: Damn! This dress done makes me look like I gave up on life!
Dressing room
Raleigh, North Carolina
Overheard by: Ursulav
Categories: Clothing | North Carolina | Rednecks | Posted 2007-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh, Good, because That's What I'm Getting Him
Old lady: You know how it's Jake's* birthday in a week or two? And you know how he likes black leather?
20-ish granddaughter, whispering: Grandma! You're making him sound like a homosexual!
Old lady: Well, it's not like I'm going to get him assless chaps.
Eagle Ridge Hospital
Coquitlam, Bristish Columbia
Canadia
And That Had Velcro Closures
Mom: Did you see how that girl was pulling that young man across the street? Maybe he was blind.
Daughter: I saw how she was dressed -- he wasn't blind. If he was blind she wouldn't be dressing so slutty. If I dated a blind guy I would wear clothes that were soft.
Louisville, Kentucky
The Back Half
Man on cell: Hang on, I'm coming with half of my pants!
Metro
Washington, DC
Categories: Clothing | On the phone | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-07-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Pearl Jam
Girl #1: Lumberjacks wear flannel.
Girl #2: And junkies.
I'm Taking You to Counseling Unless You Tell Me They're for Robbing Banks
Mother to toddler son in stall: Honey, I really don't understand your obsession with tights.
Arclight bathroom
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: flashback to my boyfriend's childhood
Categories: California | Clothing | Fashion | Kids | Moms | North America | Parents | USA | Posted 2007-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or at Least Pull Up Your Underwear
Airport PA: Will the man with his pants around his ankles please return to Security and retrieve your belt?
Chicago Midway Airport
Chicago, Illinois
Categories: Airports & flights | Clothing | Employees | Illinois | Posted 2007-06-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Undeserved Sympathy Is Better Than Being Ignored
Girl: I like wearing this hat because it makes me look like a cancer patient.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: wb
Categories: Chicks | Clothing | Overheard at Cornell | Posted 2007-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Work So Hard All Week
Devout chick: Oh my god, I know! I never wear bras on Sundays!
Shout-out: overheardatwestern.blogspot.com
Overheard by: katrina
Categories: Chicks | Clothing | Overheard at Western | Posted 2007-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He's Been in and Out of Fashion Prison My Whole Life
20-ish woman: He wears cut-offs that are cut so high that you can see the pockets and his boxers poking out, and he has plumber's crack.
Teen chick: Oh my god... And your mom actually likes this guy?
20-ish woman: No, no, no -- this is my real dad.
Mountain View-bound Light Rail
Campbell, California
Overheard by: Cracker
Categories: California | Clothing | Friends | Posted 2007-05-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Because That Would Narrow It Down
Drunk boy: I can't find her! I don't know where she is!
Drunk girl: Is she wearing clothes?
Bryn Mawr College
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Clothing | Colleges & Universities | Drunks | Pennsylvania | Posted 2007-04-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Rare Spotting of the Tufted Gay Hobo
Hobo: Hey, man, can you spare a quarter?
Suit: Sure. Here you go.
Hobo: Thanks. [Calling after suit] I like your outfit!
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: rich
Categories: Clothing | Compliments | Hobos | Overheard in PDX | Posted 2007-04-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I May Have Buttered My Ass and Come As a Parker House Roll
Chick: Do I know you from somewhere?
Dude: Uh... maybe?
Chick: Didn't you come to my Halloween party dressed as the Pillsbury Doughboy?
Dude: No.
Shout-out: overheardina2.blogspot.com
Categories: Clothing | Overheard in Ann Arbor | Students | Posted 2007-03-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
