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He Fucks an American for Breakfast, an American for Lunch, and Has a Sensible Dinner?
Very drunk 20-something in kebab shop: I'll have... a large chips... with ketchup... and mayonnaise. (pause) A quarter pounder cheese and bacon burger with extra cheese and bacon. Two pieces of fried chicken... with chili sauce... and a ten-inch pepperoni pizza.
Sober friend #1: Fucking hell, mate, that's a lot of food...
Sober friend #2: Aren't you supposed to be on a diet?
Kebab shop guy, in heavy Cypriot accent: Yeah! He's on a fucking American diet!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Where Canadian Bacon Comes From?
60-something man, watching obese woman board bus, loudly: So fat!
30-something woman, quietly: Yeah, sometimes it might be genetics or something. Not just cured by exercise, you know?
60-something man, loudly: I try to avoid getting too close to people who are that fat. I'm scared they'll just explode and innards will get all over me!
30-something woman: (disgusted look)
London
Canadia
Overheard by: On the bus
The Difference Between the U.S. and the Rest Of the World
Large American girl: So I asked him, "what's your problem?"
British girl: What did he say?
Large American girl: He said I was too fat.
British girl: Oh...
Large American girl: Motherfucker doesn't realize that big is beautiful.
Drunk British guy behind them: That's a whole lotta big! Chub, chub, chub!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Categories: Beauty | Diet & weight | England | Girls | Questions | Posted 2011-07-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Their Baby Was Born in a Booth at Popeye's
Guy #1: Hey bro, your woman fat?
Guy #2: No. Fuck, man! What you talkin'? She my baby momma, that the baby in her bump!
Guy #3: You sure? She sure look fat to me.
Coralridge Mall
Iowa City, Iowa
Plus, Skinny Girls Won't Sit Still
Male student during history class: Why are the women in these nude paintings so plump?
Professor: Because the artists had good taste.
Female student: That's right!
University of Missouri
Overheard by: Kathryn Bjornstad
Why I Stoped Watching Kirstie Alley's Reality Show
Woman on phone: Girl, I just ate a fat-ass quesadilla, and now I feel fat as fuck.
San Francisco, California
Categories: California | Diet & weight | Feelings | Food | On the phone | Women | Posted 2011-05-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Thinking About Food Nonstop
Obese guy to another: That's what I like most about dieting...
Ferndale, Washington
Categories: Character | Diet & weight | Fat people | Feelings | Washington | Posted 2011-03-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now What Makes It Cold?
Teen girl to friend: It's called "iced tea." It tastes like tea, but it's cold.
Green Line Subway
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rob
Categories: Diet & weight | Girls | Massachusetts | Sensory experiences | Words | Posted 2010-12-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Twinkie Defense Never Works.
College burnout: It has a soft and creamy center!
Friend, looking at computer: I still don't like him.
Thibodaux, Louisiana
Overheard by: Batpam
Categories: Diet & weight | Druggies | Food | Friends | Stupidity | Posted 2010-11-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Raise Your Hand If You Don't See the Problem
Agriculture student #1: So she starts screaming and I just knew, so I said, "did you search for "hot dog" without using the safety search?"
Agriculture student #2: Oh, no, hot dog without a fig leaf?
Agriculture student #1: Yeah! And you know how she is, so she starts screaming and freaking out. But it wasn't even a human, it was a dog...
University of Florida
Gainesville, Florida
And They Know
Teen girl, incredulously: But you don't call a fattie "fat"!
Teen guy: I know!
Australia
Overheard by: PCGoneWrong
Categories: Australia | Diet & weight | Names | Teens | Posted 2010-09-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now People Will Know We're Together
Obese little girl, singing: Where'd you get your body from? I got it from my mama! I got it from my mama!
Really obese mother: Shhh!
Charlestown
NSW
Australia
Categories: Australia | Diet & weight | Fat people | Kids | Kids | Moms | Parenting | Posted 2010-09-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Another Conflict in Which the Swiss Happily Remain Neutral
Overweight redhead Southern lady #1, looking through Switzerland t-shirts: Y'all, Ginger... I think this size is a li'l too small...
Overweight redhead Southern lady #2: Naw, I think that looks 'bout right.
Random lady: I thought we went on vacation to get away from the Southerners, not go find some more...
Lucerne
Switzerland
Overheard by: marisawin
Categories: Clothes | Clothing | Comebacks | Diet & weight | Europe | Fat people | Strangers | Tourists | Posted 2010-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Aww, That's Cold.
Obese teenager to mom: I wish I had an ice cream maker built into my steering wheel.
Mother: Stop.
Mobile, Alabama
Categories: Alabama | Diet & weight | Fat people | Food | Moms | Parenting | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Bad Things Happen When Housemates Mate
Guy to crowd of housemates: See, this is the kind of toilet we want--it's rated to be able to flush one kilo of material at a time.
Girl: How many kilos does a newborn weigh?
Home Depot
Oakland, California
Overheard by: Alchemist George
I Said You're Fine!
Woman to boy: Put a sweater on!
Boy's mother: No, he's fine.
Boy: I know I'm fat but I still get cold.
Sarajevo
Bosnia
Categories: Clothing | Diet & weight | Europe | Fat people | Kids | Moms | Weather | Women | Posted 2010-07-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
America: Encapsulated.
Slightly obese lady on cell: Of course I'm at the gym, honey! I promised to go to the gym today, so I'm at the gym! (hangs up, talks to friend) What an idiot. I want some ice cream.
Ice Cream Shop
Missouri
Overheard by: jeeves
Categories: Diet & weight | Fat people | Food | Friends | Insults | Lies | Missouri | On the phone | Stores | Wishes | Posted 2010-07-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Being a Termite Must Suck
Grungy teenager to group of grungy friends: And then I ate half of a cardboard box!
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
Categories: Diet & weight | Food | Friends | Teens | Washington | Weirdness | Posted 2010-07-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
New Yorkers: We Thought It Was Clean
Girl #1: I wonder if vegans get on the metro and, like, can't sit down because the seats are leather.
Guy: No, this is pleather.
Girl #2: If it were leather it would smell like it.
Guy: No, that's only clean leather.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Vegan sitting on the Metro
Categories: Diet & weight | Girls | Guys | Public Transportation | Sensory experiences | Washington, DC | Posted 2010-06-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Anywhere, Really
Middle aged woman to waitress: How do you stay so thin?
Waitress, serving woman dessert: I don't eat here.
Restaurant
Saskatchewan
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Diet & weight | Employees | Food | Questions | Restaurants | Women | Posted 2010-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Seen in Little People, Big Bummer
Very tall boy on Taipei subway: You don't need to diet, you need to grow taller.
Very short girl: I would if I could.
Very tall boy: Do you want to go to the concert?
Very short girl: I don't go to concerts.
Very tall boy: Why not?
Very short girl: I can never see anything.
Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Yugan Dali
Categories: Advice | Diet & weight | Girls | Guys | Other sites | Taiwan | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Although You're Kind Of Taking the Choice Out Of My Hands Right Now.
40-something pant suit lady #1: I've been trying to cut back on my calories.
40-something pant suit lady #2: Well, you should try...
40-something pant suit lady #3, interrupting: You should try eating a lot of fruit.
40-something pant suit lady #1: Yeah, that sounds like a great idea, my friend told me about...
40-something pant suit lady #2, interrupting: No one ever listens to me! You're always ignoring what I'm saying, and I have a lot of good things to say. (turns to 20-something male at next table) You would listen to me wouldn't you?
20-something male, looking annoyed: No.
Panera
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: Sweedie
Or Use Birth Control
Woman to friend: So I killed three of them already. I guess that means I should lose some weight.
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: corey
Now If Only I Could Marry Louis Vuitton
Really skinny sorority girl: I paid my rent and then I spent the rest, $700, on this new Louis Vuitton (squeals and hugs the purse). But now I have 30 bucks to last a whole month. Looks like I'll be dating for dinner or eating crackers.
Sorority friend: You spent twice as much on your bag as you did your rent! At least you paid your rent on time! Don't worry, you'll find dates. That purse is totally worth it!
Really skinny sorority girl: I know, right, I should just live in my purse. I think that is why married women get fat: they can finally afford to eat. You know my ass is getting fat when I get married.
IHOP
Dallas, Texas
Categories: Ass | Diet & weight | Fashion | Food | Friends | Money | Relationships | Shopping | Skinny people | Sorority types | Texas | Posted 2010-05-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So at the Very Least, She Hates Freedom.
Woman #1: No, I don't know for sure if she's a vegetarian or not.
Woman #2: Well, she wouldn't drink coffee this morning.
Woman #3, nodding head: True, true.
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: anabanana
Categories: Colorado | Diet & weight | Food | Stupidity | Women | Posted 2010-01-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's What You Said at the Pyramids Of Giza
Tourist: It's like Times Square with less fat people!
Piccadilly Circus
London
England
Overheard by: Stuart
Categories: Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | England | Tourists | Posted 2009-11-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Because I Buy You Drinks?
Girl: Dude, she digs you, why don't you ask her out?
Guy: She's fat.
Girl: You are so fucking pretentious and shallow.
Guy: I'm okay with that. It means I only fuck hotties.
Girl: We fucked, does that mean you think I'm a hottie?
Guy: No, that just means I was drunk and you were willing.
Girl: Why am I friends with you?
Guy: I have no idea.
Denver, Colorado
Categories: Beauty | Colorado | Comebacks | Diet & weight | Drinking & drunks | Girls | Guys | Insults | Sex | Posted 2009-11-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Guess Everything Really Is Bigger in Texas
New Yorker, trying to get through a crowd of people blocking aisle: Excuse me. Excuse me! Excuse me!
Confused little boy: I already moved.
New Yorker: Oh, I know you have, dear. I was talking to your fat-ass mother.
Grocery Store
Austin, Texas
Categories: Ass | Assholes | Diet & weight | Family ties | Insults | Kids | Kids | Moms | Stores | Texas | Posted 2009-11-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Whatever Your Name Is.
Very pregnant woman: I don't want to have this baby. I don't want to have to work all of this weight off.
Man: I think I should keep you pregnant. This is the least worst you've ever looked.
Hasting's
Wichita Falls, Texas
Overheard by: mikeface
Categories: Beauty | Birthing | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Guys | Preggers | Texas | Wishes | Posted 2009-11-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Friends Say It All the Time.
Little girl, singing: You got a fat butt, you got a fat butt!
Mother: Now sweetie, that's not nice to say about mommy.
Little boy: But its true!
Dressing Room
Union, New Jersey
Overheard by: Sarah
Categories: Ass | Assholes | Comebacks | Diet & weight | Kids | Moms | New Jersey | Parenting | Should have used a condom | Posted 2009-11-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...I Was Born to Be a Reality-Show Contestant
Skinny girl: My sister is on a diet now, I don't like it. First she's taller than me, but that's okay, I got over it. I just don't want her to be skinnier than me.
Guy friend: You should be happy for her.
Skinny girl: No way! I'm below that.
Vancouver
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Family ties | Friends | Girls | Guys | Happiness | Skinny people | Stupidity | Posted 2009-10-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I've Been Eating My Words a Lot Lately
Professor, discussing types of fat: Babies aren't fat like... (points at a fat girl) No, I don't want to say that... like my tummy.
University of Georgia
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Georgia | Stomach | Teachers | Posted 2009-10-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Ben and Jerry Are Such Studs
Girl to friend: And he tried to order frozen yogurt, so I didn't sleep with him. If you want to bang me, you have to eat full-fat ice cream!
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Categories: Diet & weight | Food | Friends | Girls | Pennsylvania | Sex | Wishes | Posted 2009-09-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The First Season Of The Simple Life Was Rich with Conflict
Abnormally skinny girl: I feel fat.
Normal girl: Shut up before I smother you with my muffin top.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: seward
Categories: Anorexics | Diet & weight | Feelings | Food | Girls | Overheard in Minneapolis | Threats | Posted 2009-09-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And They Love Drinking Out Of Coke Bottles
Mother to young son: The sign says that polar bears are carnivores. That means they eat mostly plants, but will eat meat when they can find it.
Henry Vilas Zoo
Madison, Wisconsin
Overheard by: weeping for the future
...Plus, I Prefer Anal. Anal!!
Chronically oversharing blonde woman: If I didn't know better, I'd swear there was a baby up in there, but there are three reasons I know that's impossible. For one thing, I'm on birth control, which is why I've gained twenty-five pounds. Twenty-five pounds! Also, I haven't had sex since (whispers) October, (resumes normal voice) so I'd be overdue. And I got my period today.
Chilango's Mexican Restaurant
Rochester, New York
Overheard by: TARDIS Dyke
Categories: Diet & weight | Health & Hygiene | New York | Pregnancy | Restaurants | Sex | Women | Posted 2009-08-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ten Bucks Says He's a Collective Hallucination
Hot burner chick: Our bar was busy until the fat naked guy showed up and scared everyone off!
Fat naked guy: I'm wearing Uggs!
Burning Man
Nevada
Overheard by: Eavesdropper
Categories: Chicks | Clothes | Creepsters | Diet & weight | Fat people | Fears | Guys | Nevada | Shoes | Weirdness | Posted 2009-08-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
No Wonder I Keep Passing Out!
Girl in bathroom stall #1: I have really exciting news!
Girl in bathroom stall #2: You just saved a bunch of money on your car insurance?
Girl in bathroom stall #1: No. When I bought these pants they fit, and now they are too big! I've been trying to lose some weight.
Girl in bathroom stall #2: That's great! What size are they?
Girl in bathroom stall #1: Ummm... 25s.
Girl in bathroom stall #2: That's like a size zero. Why are you trying to lose weight?
Girl in bathroom stall #1: Oh, is that too small or something?
Restaurant Bathroom
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Anorexics | Clothes | Clothing | Diet & weight | Girls | Massachusetts | Money | Questions | Restroom | Posted 2009-08-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Trendy Nightclubs Are Like, in Bizarro World
Crazy blonde lady on park bench: Because they're all about gluttony. Plus, it's harder for them to get in if you're thin, because they're usually fat, you know? (two heavy ladies next to her nod)
Judiciary Square
Washington, DC
Categories: Compare and contrast | Crazies | Diet & weight | Washington, DC | Women | Posted 2009-08-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Is This the Best I'm Ever Gonna Look?
Sad-looking girl on cell: I'm trying my hardest to be pretty... I'm at the gym, like, every day!
Washington, DC
Categories: Beauty | Diet & weight | Girls | On the phone | Washington, DC | Posted 2009-08-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Love Was Free, Drugs Were Plentiful...
Ecstatic woman: Take me back to the 60s--when I was skinny!
Herman's Hermits Concert
Alexandria, Virginia
Overheard by: serpent queen
Categories: Diet & weight | Virginia | Wishes | Women | Posted 2009-07-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Probably Need to Get Out Of Culinary Arts
College girl in workout gear: No, I don't really like to eat. I mean, I don't really like food. I just have to eat it, you know?
College friend: Yeah, I know what you mean. Sometimes I think, you know I could just live off of Gatorade or orange juice or something. You get the same nutrients and stuff from that anyway.
College girl in workout gear: Yeeeeah. Exactly.
Bus
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Anorexics | Bus | Diet & weight | Food | Friends | Students | Stupidity | Washington | Posted 2009-07-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Like the Miracle Of Hanukah!
Ultra-skinny hipster chick: I've been eating the same quiche for weeks.
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: Koch
Categories: Chicks | Diet & weight | Food | Hipsters | Maine | Skinny people | Posted 2009-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Also Spiritually, Metaphysically, and Anally.
Teen girl: Am I fat?
Teen boy: Emotionally? Yes.
La Jolla, California
Overheard by: Acire
Categories: California | Diet & weight | Feelings | Questions | Teens | Posted 2009-06-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So I Sleep with the Staff at Crunch in Exchange for Membership
Girl #1: You're a fat whore. Well...minus the fat part.
Girl #2: Whatever. I'd rather be a whore than fat.
Girl #3: I like your morals!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by: Ian
Categories: Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Diet & weight | Girls | Insults | Overheard at McGill | Posted 2008-11-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Case in Point
Student: Well, sometimes you ask questions that have answers that might not be the answer you are looking for!
Professor: Are you calling me fat?
Michigan State University, Michigan
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Diet & weight | Michigan | Questions | Students | Teachers | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Well He Did Have Unlimited Access to Food
Teen boy: Look! There's that pink car with the fat lady again!
Teen girl: She's everywhere! She must be Jesus!
Athens, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Mateo
Categories: Default | Diet & weight | Girls | Guys | Jesus | Pennsylvania | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Believe It's Pronounced "Ho"
Tiny girl to friend: You're not fat, you're Santa Claus-esque. Get it right, whore.
Coronado Middle School
Coronado, California
Overheard by: they won the game
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Diet & weight | Friends | Girls | Insults | Kids | Santa Claus | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Words | Posted 2008-10-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Peril Of Having Access to Unlimited Loaves and Fishes
Irate woman, commenting on depiction of Jesus at the Sidewalk Art Festival: He was so fat I couldn't even focus on the fact he was supposed to be Jesus.
Savannah, Georgia
Categories: Default | Diet & weight | Georgia | Jesus | Women | Posted 2008-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Obviously It's Not Bitchy After All
Girl on cell: I overheard some chick at a bus stop talking shit about how some other girl shouldn't have been wearing some outfit because she didn't have the body for it. At first, I thought "what a bitch!" then I realized we have that exact same conversation all the time.
Venice, California
Categories: California | Clothes | Compare and contrast | Default | Diet & weight | Girls | Insults | On the phone | Posted 2008-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
America, Encapsulated
Fat guy: (moans)
Woman: You alright?
Fat guy: I just feel...
Woman: Yeah?
Fat guy: I feel fat this morning.
Woman: Well, you shoulda eaten something. You should eat more!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: orly.
Categories: Advice | Default | Diet & weight | Fat people | Feelings | Guys | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Women | Posted 2008-09-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If Renaissance Painters Ran the Beauty Industry
Skinny woman: So what do you do?
Fat woman: I'm a dietitian.
Skinny woman: You should give me some advice!
Menands, New York
Categories: Advice | Default | Diet & weight | Fat people | New York | Offers and requests | Questions | Skinny people | Women | Posted 2008-09-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Otherwise the Terrorists Win
Teenage girl #1 (suddenly): I wonder if there are strip clubs with just fat women.
Teenage girl #2: God, I hope so.
San Jose, California
Categories: California | Default | Diet & weight | Girls | Sexuality | Teens | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2008-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Plus, They're Expendable
Skinny female lifeguard to friend: Sometimes I don't yell at the fat kids for running at the pool, 'cause I figure it's good exercise for them.
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Alyssa
What's This Baby Poking Out of Me?
Girl on cell: I can't tell if I'm losing weight from softball or gaining weight from being hungry all the time.
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Claire
Categories: Connecticut | Default | Diet & weight | Girls | On the phone | Stupidity | Posted 2008-08-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Lipstick Kind, at Least?
Size 4 girl #1: I love H&M but it makes me feel so fat. I have to wear a size 6 or 8 when I shop here.
Size 4 girl #2: Yeah, and that vest makes you look like a lesbian.
H&M
Chicago, Illinois
It's the Greatest Thing Since... You Know
Girlfriend: I think my butt has gotten bigger.
Boyfriend: If that's true, hallelujah. I love big booties.
Girlfriend: David*, this is serious! I think I have been doing so many squats that my butt has lifted and risen... like bread.
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: MoMo
Competing on Any Reality Show, in a Nutshell
Guy: It's like playing hopscotch with your shirt off and the little kids are like: "Mommy, look at his boobies!" and I'm like: "Yeah. Look at my boobies."
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: well that's neat
Categories: Default | Diet & weight | Fat people | Gender issues | Guys | Kids | Nipples | Overheard in Minneapolis | Posted 2008-06-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Somewhere There's a Live, Cheerful Half of a Rat, and No One Knows How Heavy He Is
Girl #1: And I was like: "How many depressed lab rats do you have to weigh and kill to figure that out?"
Girl #2: What?
Girl #3: 37.5, apparently.
Macalester College
St. Paul, Minnesota
Categories: Animals | Colleges & Universities | Default | Diet & weight | Friends | Minnesota | Questions | Science | Sorority types | Posted 2008-06-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She'll Be All, "Help Me, Dr. Phil"!
Guy #1: I love getting Lisa* Taco Bell.
Guy #2: Why's that?
Guy #1: It's gonna get her fat! I'm going to get extra sour cream and she's going to be all like: "Damn, this is delicious!" Meanwhile, she'll be getting fat.
Kangaroo
Gainesville, Florida
Categories: Default | Diet & weight | Florida | Food | Friends | Guys | Offers and requests | Questions | Relationships | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2008-06-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Specifically, a Fatty Boombalatty
Guy: I learned something... What did I learn? I learned that my son is a fatty.
Chick-fil-A
Marietta, Georgia
Categories: Dads | Diet & weight | Family ties | Georgia | Offspring | Questions | Restaurants | Words | Posted 2008-05-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Just a Toxic Spill Waiting to Happen
Goth girl, to friend looking at military jackets: You can get those a lot cheaper at goodwill, dude.
Overweight friend: Not in my size! When fat people die, they leak, and then their clothes can't be given to goodwill!
Starfest Sci-Fi Convention
Denver, Colorado
Categories: Advice | Clothes | Colorado | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Fat people | Friends | Girls | Goths | Gripes | Money | Offers and requests | Posted 2008-05-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Do I Have to Rationalize for Everyone in This Family?
Fat kid: Mom, I wanna go on a diet.
Fat mom: You don't need to go on a diet, you're too young!
Fat kid: You aren't too young.
Fat mom: Shush.
Meat Section at Publix
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Trevor Allen
Categories: Advice | Age and ageing | Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Fat people | Florida | Moms | Should have used a condom | Stores | Wishes | Posted 2008-05-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Figure Since He Died for Me, I May As Well Give Him Something Nice to Look At
Man: I'm giving up bread for lent.
Woman: Is that because Jesus Christ died for your sins, or because you're concerned with your figure?
Starbucks
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Maggie
Categories: Beauty | Christianity | Comebacks | Diet & weight | Food | Guys | Holidays | Jesus | Restaurants | Women | Posted 2008-04-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
This Is a Photo Of a Manatee, Sir
Townie to his friend: Yeah well, just because you don't like your fat wife doesn't mean I don't!
Plaza Restaurant
Gettysburg, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alyssa
Categories: Beauty | Compare and contrast | Diet & weight | Feelings | Friends | Guys | Pennsylvania | Relationships | Restaurants | Posted 2008-04-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Mmm, Faminelicious.
Chick: Brazilians are the bomb.
Dude: Eastern European chicks are always sooo hot because they can't afford food.
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com" rel="external">www.overheardatmcgill.com
Categories: Beauty | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Diet & weight | Food | Gender issues | Geography | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Overheard at McGill | Posted 2008-04-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Whatever. Starving Children in Nigeria Don't Even Have Earlobes.
Bartender: Geez, Hank, you're looking great these days. Been working out?
Chubby Jewish guy: Yeah. I tell ya, I've been trying to lose the spare tire, but I lost it all in my earlobes instead. It's a cruel world.
Suami's India Garden Resturant
Cincinnati, Ohio
Overheard by: Jeebus McGee
Categories: Bartenders | Body parts | Default | Diet & weight | Fat people | Gripes | Jews | Ohio | Restaurants | Posted 2008-03-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Anyone Who's Seen Se7en?
Student: Who doesn't want to blow up a fat man before they die?
Ethics class, Oregon State University
Corvallis, Oregon
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Death & dying | Default | Diet & weight | Oregon | Questions | Students | Violence | Posted 2008-03-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Look at Her Walking Around Like She Has a Right to Exist
Biotech: Wow. That girl wears clothes like she's not fat, and that's funny.
California
Overheard by: dev
Categories: Biotechs | California | Diet & weight | Gripes | Posted 2008-02-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Don't Worry, Sweetie, You'll Love the Gym Membership
Wife eating cheeseburger: I know what my New Year's resolution is going to be...
Distracted husband: To lose weight?
Wife: What? No! Why would you say that?! Do you think I'm getting fat?
Husband: Oh! No, no, no -- you're not fat. You're perfect! I love you so much just the way you are.
Wife: Whatever. I better be getting a good fucking Christmas present, and you definitely won't be seeing me naked for a very long time.
Wendy's
New Hartford, New York
Categories: Couples | Diet & weight | Insults | New York | Posted 2008-01-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Moveable Feast?
Fat lady #1: You can not wear that.
Fat lady #2: Shut up. I'm gonna suck it in!
Old Navy, Palisades Center Mall
Nyack, New York
Overheard by: Please Don't
Categories: Diet & weight | Friends | New York | Posted 2008-01-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Felt Good to Be Different from the English
Artsy girl #1: Hey, remember that time in London when we both thought we had scabies, but we didn't?
Artsy girl #2, sighing: That was one of the best days of my life!
Arcadia University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Hiding my laughter in the photo lab
Categories: Chicks | Diet & weight | Memory lane | Pennsylvania | Posted 2008-01-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And My Kidneys Start Back Up
Princess #1: Oh my god, I have that top in, like, three colors.
Princess #2: Yeah, me, too.
Princess #1: You wanna get some lunch or something?
Princess #2: I can't. When I eat I get bloated.
Broadway Shopping Centre
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Ms Dash
Categories: Australia | Bimbettes | Diet & weight | Posted 2007-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I Look Delicious
Mom, looking at pot belly hog: Look, this pig is so fat and lazy that it just lays there all day.
Chubby tween son: Yeah, just like me.
Mom, laughing nervously and glancing around: Come on, honey, don't say that. You're nothing like it.
Chubby tween son: Yes, I am, Mom. I'm serious. Don't you see? It's like looking in the mirror.
Donaldson Park Petting Zoo
Highland Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: beginning to see the resemblance
Categories: Diet & weight | Insults | Kids | New Jersey | Posted 2007-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Don't Overflow with Each Other Anymore
Old lady with husband talking to head usher: We are in Row C, Seats 22 and 23. Ummm... Do you think we could move our seats? It's just that the lady next to us is rather large, and she is overflowing onto my husband, who is overflowing on to me...
Thousand Islands Play House
Gananoque, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Shmemily
Categories: Canadia | Diet & weight | Old folks | Posted 2007-11-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Have Liposuction on the Delivery Table
Bimbette on cell: Oh, okay, so she can't gain any more weight. That should be easy -- she's only at the beginning of the pregnancy. She just has to stop eating.
Princeton University
Princeton, New Jersey
Categories: Bimbettes | Diet & weight | New Jersey | Posted 2007-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Happens to the Best of Us
Man #1: There is literally a whale driving that car. Through some form of magic, a whale was turned into a woman and is now driving a car!
Man #2: I think the whale looks pretty surprised. I would be, too, if I suddenly got turned into a woman and put in a car!
Shout-out: www.overheardquote.com
Overheard by: wyse
Categories: Diet & weight | Jerks | Overheard Quote | Posted 2007-10-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Ice Cream Is Medicinal
Girl #1: Really? How did that make you feel?
Girl #2: Fat and guilty.
Student Center, Colorado State University
Fort Collins, Colorado
Categories: Chicks | Colorado | Diet & weight | Posted 2007-10-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Big Pukers, Not So Much
Blonde: I heard guys like big girls now.
Brunette: Excuse me while I vomit.
School bathroom
Newark, New Jersey
Categories: Biotechs | Diet & weight | New Jersey | Posted 2007-10-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Pretty Much Assume the Shape of Whatever They Sit or Lie on
Loud woman to friend: So, I'm seeing all these people with waistband numbers in the triple digits, and I wonder how they stay in such a shape, y'know?
Norwood, Massachusetts
Categories: Diet & weight | Ladies who lunch | Massachusetts | Posted 2007-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Go Fuck Yourself?
Wife of fat guy: Y'know, honey, I heard on Oprah that every 35 pounds you lose, you gain an inch in penis length.
Fat guy: I know I could stand to lose 70 pounds, but what am I gonna do with a 22-inch dick?
Shout-out: community.livejournal.com
Categories: Couples | Diet & weight | Overheard in California's Journal | Penis | Posted 2007-10-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And, Even Then, Mostly Cock and Ecstasy
Drunk girl #1: God, I hate you. How do you stay so skinny?
Drunk girl #2: I only eat when I'm drunk.
United Kingdom
Overheard by: Nighttime Smoker
Categories: Diet & weight | Drunks | UK | Posted 2007-09-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Wish You Were Fat, Too
Bimbette #1: I wish I was fat.
Bimbette #2: I totally know what you mean.
Dallas, Texas
Categories: Bimbettes | Diet & weight | Texas | Posted 2007-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Fuck Your Way to a Positive Body Image
Teen: I used to think I was fat, but then I realized I wouldn't have had sex with five guys if I was fat. No one wants to have sex with a fat girl.
Wendy's
New Jersey
Overheard by: BTON
Categories: Diet & weight | New Jersey | Sex | Teens | Posted 2007-08-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
My Miracle Diet? A Coat Hanger.
Tween #1: I can't believe she called you fat!
Tween #2: Well, I am, but it's because we're freshman -- we haven't lost our baby fat yet.
Tween #1: Well, that's true for you. I'm just fat because I'm pregnant.
Tween #2: Yeah, that too.
Arlington High School
LaGrangeville, New York
Overheard by: draz
Categories: Diet & weight | New York | Pregnancy | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teens | Posted 2007-08-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But They Don't Know You Like I Do
Anorexic chick: I'm fat, aren't I? Everyone knows it, too.
Friend: You're not as fat as everyone says.
Irvine Spectrum
Orange County, California
Categories: Anorexics | California | Diet & weight | Posted 2007-05-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
