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Your Editors Are Not Proud Of Having Seen This
Confused-sounding girl on cell: I could fit an orange in my vagina?
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
...Which Is Weird, Because I Keep Fucking Complete Douches.
Teen girl #1: Tell him it's a date. I need to get laid.
Teen girl #2: Oh my goodness.
Teen girl #1: My vagina has cobwebs!
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Carly
Cunt Remember a Thing
Pretty black girlfriend with super long hair: I have no vaginal memory.
Cornell University
Ithaca, New York
Categories: Black people | Girls | Memory lane | New York | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2011-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The One Advantage to Growing Up Next to a Nuclear Power Plant
Drunk man: I just really want a fucking vagina!
Drunk woman: Like sparkly pink neon!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: I'm sure you do
Categories: Drunks | Overheard in Minneapolis | Vagina | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2011-06-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's So Hard to Find Cheap Storage in the City
Guy reading iPhone: IT sez here some gal in Fort Meyers was arrested and later found to have a knife hidden in her vagina.
Friend: I could go with that...
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Café con leche
But, in the Future, Please Confine Your Questions to Topics in English Literature
Professor: And so in REM sleep you'll get penile erection and vaginal lubrication. You know, the fun stuff. (class laughs) Well, your eyes aren't the only things that are moving!
York University
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: studious student
You're No Pussy, Dad
Teenage girl to father: I didn't come out of her vagina, okay? I don't have to respect her.
Father: Well, I guess you don't respect me either, cause you didn't come out of my vagina!
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: made my day
We're Gonna Get Along Swimmingly, Mate.
Drunk #1: I'm telling you man, these fucking guys raped a fish.
Drunk #2: What fucking guys?
Drunk #1: In Africa. They raped a fish. That's why the fish have to wear condoms, so they don't have fish babies with bulging human eyes.
Drunk #3: How the fuck did we get from talking about his (gestures towards drunk #2) sister's hairy vulva to fish rape?
Drunk #4: How the fuck would you even rape a fish anyway?
Drunk #1: Gut it and wank with its corpse?
Drunk #2, knowingly: Or freeze it and push it up your arse.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
The Ultra-boring Game Show Prickle Factor Was Canceled After Just One Episode.
Guy#1: I just don't like shaved vaginas. They creep me out. I got down there and I was like "Oh"!
Guy#2: Yeah, you have the prickle factor.
Guy#1: There was no prickle factor...
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Josh
I Told You the Whole Rugby Team Wouldn't Fit.
Youngish girl to pair of friends: My vagina is ruined after last night.
Melbourne
Australia
When Yonkers Girls Make a Sexual Availability Statement
Roller girl: Whoa! That's a vagina you could accidentally fist.
Yonkers, New York
Categories: Girls | Masturbation | New York | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2011-03-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She Always Comes Through in the Clench
Roommate #1: But if she has a denty-face?
Roommate #2: Well, that has no bearing on her sphincter.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: roommate #3
Categories: Ass | Friends | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2011-01-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now Would You Mind Shutting Up and Blowing Me?
Guy: I don't have a favorite person. (pause, then begrudgingly) Well, I guess my favorite person is her... (points at girlfriend)
Girlfriend, unenthusiastically: Well, gee.
Park Tavern
Jersey City, New Jersey
Categories: Compliments | Couples | New Jersey | Relationships | Vagina | Posted 2011-01-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Shall I Demonstrate on This Turkey?
EMS instructor, about female reproductive system: Backing away from this now... We don't want to get too deep into it.
Bergen County SMS Academy
New Jersey
Overheard by: Emt student
Categories: New Jersey | Sensory experiences | Sexuality | Teachers | Uterus | Vagina | Posted 2010-12-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Before My Sister Was Like, "Get Out Of My Room!"
Bearded college guy: I almost saw a high school girl's vagina today!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: a. lil
Categories: Bragging | Overheard in Minneapolis | Sensory experiences | Students | Vagina | Posted 2010-12-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sir, You Have My Attention
Guy, walking on the sidewalk under row of windows: So, on the subject of vaginas...
Portland, Oregon
Categories: Creepsters | Oregon | Sexuality | Vagina | Words | Posted 2010-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Took Pictures and Visited the Gift Shop!
Girl: You fucked my vagina twice this weekend!
Guy, exasperated: You don't have to tell me! I was there!
Jersey City, New Jersey
Categories: Comebacks | Couples | New Jersey | Sex | Vagina | Posted 2010-11-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Is This, Degrassi?
Female student: Uh... I think we left off on the hymen.
Sex ed teacher: Oh, we're going there.
Janesville, Wisconsin
To Errol Is Human. My Dick: Divine.
Greek girlfriend: She misses you baby.
English boyfriend: Hm?
Greek girlfriend: She misses you.
English boyfriend: Who misses me?
Greek girlfriend: Helena.
English boyfriend: Who's Helena?
Greek girlfriend: My vagina, baby.
Indian guy at table: You named your snatch Helena?! Really? You named your vagina?
Greek girlfriend: Sure, don't you have a name for your dick?
Indian guy and English boyfriend, at same time: No.
Greek girlfriend: I've always thought of your dick as being called Errol, baby.
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Voters Are Evenly Split on My Ovaries
Girl to friend: But yeah, my uterus sucks. I wish I just had a vagina and it ended there. But I do love my pancreas!
University of Arizona
Ad: Kathleen Turner Is... Bendy Vadge, P.I.!
Loud, stoned, drunk guy on train: Dude, I totally saw Melissa pee standing up before.
Loud, stoned, drunk girl: That is impossible! Seriously, that doesn't even make any sense! You'd get piss all over your leg!
Loud, stoned, drunk guy: No way, I saw her just take one leg out of her pants and prop it up against a tree, and it just shot down! She didn't get any anywhere!
Loud, stoned, drunk girl: Do you even understand female anatomy?! It doesn't work the same way as you! We can't do that! Melissa didn't do that!
Loud, stoned, drunk guy: Dude, if you can't pee standing up, then you've just got a bendy vag.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Wizzbiff
Categories: Body parts | Drinking & drunks | Drunks | Girls | Guys | Illinois | Pee | Stoners | Train | Vagina | Posted 2010-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Tulsa" Spelled Backwards Is "a Slut"-- Coincidence?
Teen girl to friend: I'm too sexy for my vulva.
Tulsa, Oklahoma
Do You Have to Say That About Everything?
Girlfriend: Those sculptures over there look nice.
Boyfriend: Baby, I think they're vaginas.
Norman, Oklahoma
Categories: Compliments | Couples | Oklahoma | Vagina | Posted 2010-09-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...In 3...2...1...
Girl: There will be a beautiful rainbow of racial harmony coming out of my vagina.
Aurora, Colorado
...Let Us Pray
20-something nasty-looking girl in pub, scratching furiously down trousers: Jesus, my clunge itches!
Leamington Spa
England
Best. Birthday Party. Ever.
Teen boy to girl: No! It was an Indian! And it was not vagina soup!
Danby, New York
Steve Miller: "Same Here."
Girl: How do you choose a good peach?
Guy: I go with whichever would make the prettiest vagina. Seems to work pretty well.
Produce Market
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Dr. Banana Grabber
Kinda Like Disney World?
20-something guy: I had a threesome once with two lesbians. They were eating each other's pussies out. It was fun.
20-something girl: You liked it?
20-something guy: I didn't say I liked it. I said it was fun.
Norman, Oklahoma
Don't You Mean "Fabulous"?
Five-year-old boy to mom: Does it feel weird to have a vagina?
Mom: Well, I've had one my whole life, so it feels normal to me.
Five-year-old boy: I wish I knew what it felt like to have one!
Mom: I'm pretty sure you'll be a member of the LGBT community anyway, so maybe you'll find out.
Five-year-old boy: What's LGBT?
Mom: You'll find out soon enough, honey.
Five-year-old boy: That sounds really cool!
Roseville, California
Overheard by: Nature vs Nurture
Why I Stopped Hanging Out with Meatheads.
Straight guy: Why do gay men love boobs but hate vaginas?
Gay guy: Because boobs are pretty and vaginas look like a roast beef sandwich.
Drunk guy: I could so go for Arby's right now.
Huaraz
Peru
Overheard by: Nick
Categories: Beauty | Compare and contrast | Drunks | Food | Gender issues | Guys | Queers | Rack | South America | Vagina | Posted 2010-07-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...In the Immortal Words Of Jack Kerouac
Old lady: I have a roof over me and clothes on my back, but I can't wash my box...
Lowell, Massachusetts
Overheard by: glad I wasn't sitting next to her
Categories: Cleanliness | Clothes | Massachusetts | Old folks | Vagina | Posted 2010-07-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Agree, at Least in Principle
20-something on cell: So I said to her, "I don't care if you are my stepsister: if you shaved it, I want to see it!"
San Francisco, California
Categories: Family ties | Health & Hygiene | On the phone | San Francisco | Shaving | Vagina | Posted 2010-07-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Can Only Hope That Means Something Different in England
Mother: So where are we going now?
Young son: Poon! Wooo!
Newcastle
England
Overheard by: Cate
Tonight's Movie: Good Will Cunting
Girl to friend doing geometry worksheet: If the answer's 27.5, my vagina is a genius.
Tampa, Florida
It's on My Google Calendar!
Girl #1: Ew! Are you gonna ask her tonight? You gonna ask her?
Girl #2: What?
Girl #1: Why she has a huge fucking bush!
Girl #2: Oh, for sure!
McGill University
Montreal
Canadia
So Gay Men Aren't the Target Demograpic for That?
Straight girl: So then we were making out, and it was really good...
Gay guy #1: Wait, isn't this story supposed to be about how good he was at going down on you?
Straight girl: Oh, I'm getting there.
Gay guy #2: Yeah, okay, but this is really taking too long. Get to the point.
Gay guy #1: Seriously. I mean, we don't really like hearing about straight hookups anyway. It's gross. We're just humoring you.
Guy guy #3: This is like the longest pussy-eating story I've heard all day.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: TMI
Categories: Fag hags | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Licking | Queers | San Francisco | Sex | Sexuality | Vagina | Posted 2010-06-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...So We Had to Tend to It.
Guy: You abandoned me last night! Both of you, you and James*!
Girl: I'm sorry, I was feeling sick. And I told James* to go back to the bar afterwards, but then, you know, I have a vagina...
Saint Peter's College
New Jersey
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Feelings | Girls | Guys | New Jersey | Sex | Vagina | Posted 2010-06-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
British Cooking: Further Explained
30-something woman on phone: So I pulled it out of my vagina, and that was that. Shame.
Hull
England
Categories: On the phone | UK | Vagina | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2010-05-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Not Ready for 3D TV
Blonde, on childbirth: Well, there's blood, and there are vaginas, and both make people uncomfortable.
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Categories: Girls | Health & Hygiene | Vagina | Wisconsin | Posted 2010-05-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Next: a Game Of "Just the Tip"
Not-very-smooth guy to attractive woman at bar: I just want to see it! I promise I won't touch your vagina.
Tallahassee, Florida
When Camel Toe Becomes Hammer Toe
Teacher: Pants so tight it could snap your vagina off!
Sex-Ed Class
Tampa, Florida
No Wonder Everybody Has Herpes
Freshman guy: In health today, we were looking at pictures of vaginas with herpes, and it made me want pizza...
High School
Steilacoom, Washington
Overheard by: Meredith
Categories: Compare and contrast | Food | STDs | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Students | Vagina | Washington | Weirdness | Posted 2010-04-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or, If I Were a Lot Taller, a Golf Bag.
Guy: If I had a vagina I'd have all kinds of stuff up there. (pause) I'd use it as a shower caddy.
Hoboken, New Jersey
Overheard by: Laura
Categories: Guys | New Jersey | Vagina | Wishes | Posted 2010-04-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
For the Last Time, It Was a Freak Welding Accident!
Guy on cell: Yeah, I get scared when you turn out the lights. (pause) That's not gay. (pause) It's not gay when "turning out the lights" means putting your hands over my eyes while we're test-driving a car that's worth more than your sister's gold plated vahjay!
George Mason University
Virginia
Overheard by: Your sister won
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Fears | Guys | Money | On the phone | Vagina | Virginia | Posted 2010-03-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hey, You Can Take the California Driver's Test in Vagina
Preppy blonde teen: So I told him I really had to go, and he said my pussy was telling him it wanted to stay.
Brunette friend: What the fuck, I never knew he spoke vagina!
Beverly Hills, California
Categories: California | Sex | Teens | Vagina | Posted 2010-03-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just the Whites-- She's on a Diet
Bar patron to another: And then we cracked eggs into her vagina.
Blue Moon Tavern
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Baristas | Bars & Clubs | Food | Vagina | Washington | Weirdness | Posted 2010-03-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Really Doesn't Age Well
Guy to another: Don't shake my hand, dude, it's still got pussy on it!
Men's Bathroom
Bar, Alabama
Overheard by: So glad I don't live here anymore
The Best Possible Kind
Girl: A vagina is a delicate flower!
Guy: It's a fucking hole!
Bayonne, New Jersey
Categories: Compare and contrast | Girls | Guys | New Jersey | Sex | Vagina | Posted 2010-02-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Monkey's Paw Is Especially Disturbing
Girl #1: It's just such a gross look, y'know? And she totally didn't have the body for it either. Total crotch octopus.
Girl #2: Crotch octopus?
Girl #1: Yeah, you know. When the fabric clings... and shows all your goodies?
Girl #2: Do you mean camel toe?
Girl #1: Yes! Right! Camel toe! I knew it had something to do with animals and appendages!
Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania
Categories: Animals | Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Girls | Pennsylvania | Stupidity | Vagina | Posted 2010-02-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What All Guys Hope and All Girls Fear
Teen to friend: My pants are tight in the crotch, I think I am getting bigger in that region.
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: el.
What's a Clitoris?
Woman #1: Have you ever looked at your hymen?
Woman #2: No, and neither have you, because you're no longer a virgin.
Woman #1: Yes, I have! It's that little flap of skin at the top.
Woman #2: That's your clitoris, and you're an idiot.
Calgary
Alberta
Canadia
Oh, Tina Turner, We Know.
Hungover girl: Oh my god! Look at my hair, it's a mess! I look like a horse's vagina!
Flight above London
England
...Tha'ts My New Profile Photo!
Girl to friend: Stop! Theirs a picture of his finger in my vagina.
Uninc Loudoun County, Virginia
Ricky Has Yet to Encounter Tentacle Porn
Girl to boy: Yeah, well, I watched Hentai once. I think Japanese people have mammal fetishes because all the girls had four ears, and there seemed to be furry rodents latched onto their vulvae.
Hammondsport, New York
That's What My Gymnastics Coach Used to Say!
Biology teacher: Today we are going to learn to make a wet mount.
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: the one chortling in the back
Stick Something Weird in Your Penis, Then
20-something girl: If I had a penis I wouldn't know what to do with it. Awkward.
20-something guy: If I had a vagina I'd stick all kinds of weird stuff in it all the time!
Salt Lake City, Utah
Overheard by: akvinsc
Ever Feel Like You Lost Your Virginity to the Wrong Guy?
Dirty hippie guy to dirty hippie girl: If your vagina's that sore, then just go home!
Dunegrass Music Fest
Empire, Michigan
Overheard by: So Confused
We Always Thought They Went to Smith
Girl, entering the library with a large phallic diorama: People! Where do the vaginas go?
Public Library
Eugene, Oregon
Gotta Love Good Old-Fashioned Southern Courtship
Man in truck to woman in car: Hey there--you want a steak?
Woman: What? No.
Man: Even if it was in a box?
Woman: No, thanks, I'm cool.
Stoplight
Atlanta, Georgia
I Hope I Get a Piece with Hair!
Chick #1: Do you want some peanut M&Ms?
Chick #2: No, thanks.
Chick #1: They touched my crotch.
Chick #2: In that case, sure!
High School Bus
Englewood, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Hey, My Vulva Gets Excellent Mileage!
Girl: What are you?
White pants: Jay Gatsby, old sport.
Girl: You know you're not supposed to wear white after Labor Day.
White pants: I can make out the bulk of your vulva at the moment, I believe it would be behoove me to consult someone else with regards to taste.
Halloween Party
Tampa, Florida
Overheard by: Dr Doctor
That's the Last Time I'll Give Her Something for Safekeeping
Bro to friend: Well, that's in your sister's vagina, so I don't know how you feel about that.
High School
Illinois
Overheard by: Chloe
Categories: Family ties | Feelings | Friends | Illinois | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Vagina | Posted 2009-11-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Show and Tell Is Discouraged After Elementary School
Short girl: I studied the wrong vagina!
Curlie: Me too, but I studied the right penis.
Chem teacher: Uh...
Onteora, New York
Why Is That Always Your Question?
College girl: I really want to go as Superman!
Friend: You aren't going to stuff your crotch, are you?
Melbourne University
Australia
Categories: Australia | Colleges & Universities | Friends | Pop culture | Sorority types | Vagina | Wishes | Posted 2009-11-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Type Of Question That Should Be on the SATs
Teenage boy to school friend: Dude, why would you buy a pocket vagina and not use it?
High School
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Murray
Categories: Connecticut | Friends | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Shopping | Teens | Toys | Vagina | Posted 2009-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Adam and Eve Were Initially Quite Confused About Sex
Girl to friend: Yes, but he can't pick it off an apple tree that comes out of my vag.
Dorm
Washington, DC
I Blame the Dora the Explorer Movies
Guy on cell: I would be walking, and suddenly the word "vaginas" with a massive smiley face beside would pop into my head, as if my brain was trying to tell me it's fun... like a children's book.
Winnipeg
Canadia
Overheard by: Chad
Categories: Books | Canadia | Compare and contrast | Guys | On the phone | Vagina | Words | Posted 2009-10-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Not Quite a Haiku, Eric.
Guy: My favorite thing about Halle Berry is her vagina.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Shlange
Categories: About celebrities | Compare and contrast | Guys | Illinois | Vagina | Posted 2009-10-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And It Fulfills Your Science Requirement?
College freshman girl: Wait... wait... Dinosaurs and vaginas!? (pause) Oh, now I get it!
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: prefers dinosaurs
Categories: Animals | Questions | Students | Vagina | Washington | Posted 2009-10-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks, Lifetime Movie Marathon!
Girl: Did you just get a vagina?
Boy: I think it's bleeding.
Vancouver
Canadia
Naturally, She's Going on to Smith
Senior girl #1: Ugh! I feel like I've seen Katie's vagina way to many times.
Senior girl #2: Everyone has seen Katie's vagina. I don't know if you can graduate if you haven't.
Colorado
Overheard by: will be graduating...
Categories: Colorado | Education | Sensory experiences | Students | Vagina | Posted 2009-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Do You Go to Church?
Girl to friend: It's like someone touches your cunt and you get all happy.
Easton, Maryland
Evidence That Sex and the City Would've Been a *Lot* More Interesting If It Had Involved Plus-Sized Sistahs
Plus-size sistah: And that damn condom came off!
Friend: Oh, shit, girl! What happened?
Plus-size sistah: I dunno. It's still up in there.
Friend: What? How long?
Plus-size sistah: It's been three days. I can't reach that bitch!
Friend: Girl! That's nasty! And if you askin' what I think you askin', you can forget it!
Restaurant, Chinatown
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Joe
Categories: Biotechs | Condoms | Fat people | Friends | Questions | Restaurants | Vagina | Washington, DC | Weirdness | Posted 2009-09-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Should Put a Camera in There, Like at Spash Mountain
Girl #1: Walking is the most natural form of transportation.
Girl #2: Or the birth canal. It's like America's water slide.
Friendswood, Texas
Categories: Compare and contrast | Girls | Pregnancy | Texas | Vagina | Posted 2009-09-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She's Self-conscious Enough About Her Stigmata
Girl: Stop talking about my sister's holes!
Denmark
Categories: Europe | Family ties | Girls | Vagina | Posted 2009-09-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Mating Season Can Be Brutal in Canadia
Girl: This entire city smells like vagina.
Toronto
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compare and contrast | Girls | Sensory experiences | Vagina | Posted 2009-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How Do They Procreate?
Girl: The squid's like an octopus, don't you think?
Older woman: There's no pussy about it.
Birmingham
England
Overheard by: Helz
I'm Surprised That You Left the House
Girl #1: I smell vagina. Do you smell vagina?
Girl #2: No.
Girl #1: Is it my vagina? Maybe it's your breath. (girl #2 blows in her face) Yeah, it's your breath. It smells like vagina.
Charleston, South Carolina
Categories: Girls | Questions | Sensory experiences | South Carolina | Vagina | Posted 2009-09-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Well Why'd You Enroll in an Art History Class?
Dumb Girl #1: I feel like I'm suffocating!
Dumb girl #2: Why? What's wrong?
Dumb girl #1: It's just too much! There's vagina everywhere!
High School
Genoa, Ohio
Overheard by: Tricia Rae
Categories: Girls | Health & Hygiene | Idiots | Ohio | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Vagina | Posted 2009-09-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or When You Pull the Tampons Out Of Your Butt?
Gay boy to girl posse, seeing commercial for panty liners with extra sticking power: So, like, doesn't it hurt when they stick to your vag?
Fargo, North Dakota
Categories: Girls | Health & Hygiene | Queers | Questions | Sensory experiences | USA | Vagina | Posted 2009-08-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's What You Said About Uncle Walter!
Little girl: Mommy, can I have a bubble bath?
Mother: No, it makes your vagina hurt.
Plantation, Florida
Overheard by: i guess that's a valid reason.
You Think They're Gay?
Girl drinking outside: It's just, like, I pay rent to live here, I don't want his semen and her little vagina juices everywhere!
Guy drinking outside: I don't think those guys walking by wanted to hear that.
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Overheard by: Guy walking by
Shall We Try "P" for "Polanski"?
Guy #1: What aisle are we looking for?
Guy #2: We should be looking under teen girls' rugs.
Guy #1: Yikes!
Furniture Store
New York City, New York
...Just Like the Magician Did Yesterday
Three-year-old girl, emerging from woods near campsite: Mommy, there are sticks in my pee hole.
Mommy: That's okay honey, just pull them out.
Kalalau Valley
Kauai, Hawaii
It Needs Watering, If You Follow Me
Woman on phone: As long as she can wear it without showing her lady garden, then that's fine by me.
Christchurch
New Zealand
Categories: Clothes | Clothing | New Zealand | On the phone | Vagina | Women | Posted 2009-07-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Was the Best Of News, It Was the Worst Of News
Young girl in stall with mother: Mommy, what's that?
Mother to young girl: It's called pubic hair, sweetie...all women have it. When you get older, someday you will get some.
Young girl, mortified: Nooooooooooo!
Mall Restroom
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Monica
Categories: Age and ageing | Hair | Kids | Malls | Moms | Parenting | Questions | Restroom | Should have used a condom | Vagina | Washington, DC | Posted 2009-07-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ooo, or Hand Puppets!
Gay man, pensively: I bet vaginas make excellent hand-warmers.
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
...It's Deep
Women studies professor, waving arms: We all have the same vaginas!
Student: I love this class.
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Tri
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Education | Students | Teachers | Vagina | Washington | Posted 2009-07-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I've Forbidden It from Watching Terms Of Endearment
Queer, after being rushed to play Scrabble: You don't understand what it's like having all vowels!
Drunk girl: You don't understand what it's like having a vagina, so who wins?
Queer: I do! I have an emotional vagina.
Long Beach, California
Overheard by: pucewoman
At Least Five Times a Day.
Girl inside stall: I love my vagina!
Bathroom in Bar
New Haven, Connecticut
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bringing it back to you | Connecticut | Feelings | Girls | Vagina | Posted 2009-06-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Not Sure I've Heard This Version Of "Goldilocks and the Three Bears"
Teenage boy: She said his bazooka was too big for her funhole.
High School
North Carolina
Overheard by: aWkWaRd
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | North Carolina | Penis | Sex | Teens | Vagina | Posted 2009-06-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Did You Shave Your Upper Lip With Occam's Razor?
Freshman, walking down hallway with friend: Dude, this hallway smells like the pussy I ate last night.
High School
West Bloomfield, Michigan
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Friends | Licking | Michigan | Sensory experiences | Students | Vagina | Posted 2009-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
John Lennon's "Imagine" Went Through Several Preliminary Drafts
Blonde girl: Haha, imagine if my flange was a romantic love chasm... It's more of a cheeky fuckhole.
Loughborough
England
Overheard by: Gibson
...When I Sat on His Face. What?
Girl #1: My 21st birthday was fun.
Girl #2: So was mine, minus the fact that my friends bought stuffed animal beavers at the winery and proceeded to yell about how soft and hairy their beavers were... While my dad was driving.
Girl #2's grandma: What's a beaver?
Girl #2's mom: It's...what some people call the female genitalia.
Girl #2's grandma: Ohhh...your grandfather used to just call it a cunt.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Age and ageing | Animals | Compare and contrast | Default | Family ties | Girls | Hair | Moms | Old folks | Questions | San Francisco | Vagina | Words | Posted 2009-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That Bitch Is Sweet!
New Jersey guy #1: Dude, I bet Mother Teresa's pussy was like throwing a hot dog down a hallway.
New Jersey guy #2: Is that the bitch from the maple syrup bottle?
New Jersey
Overheard by: Cougar Bear
Categories: Christianity | Default | Food | Guys | New Jersey | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2009-06-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And Now She's My Bank Teller!
Angry girl in bank drive-through, on phone: Hey, bitch! That girl you had me with last night? Her cunt tasted like fish!
Bank teller: (speechless)
Coralville, Iowa
Overheard by: KC
I'm Like, "Everybody Dies-- Walk It Off!"
Guy with mullet on cell: He's in that "oh, my wife just died" mood. (long pause) Yeah, I know. Boo-hoo, ya fuckin' pussy!
Plantation, Florida
Overheard by: Just wants to buy some Spaghetti-O's
Categories: Death & dying | Default | Feelings | Florida | Guys | Relationships | Vagina | Posted 2009-05-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Hate When They Do It While You're Driving, and You Can't See the Road
Frustrated gamer playing The Legend of Zelda: Did you see that? She's such a slut! Her vagina was just totally up in link's face. And he's like, twelve. Why are women like that all the time?
University of Massachusetts
Overheard by: the girl in the corner cramming for finals
Categories: Age and ageing | Body parts | Colleges & Universities | Default | Guys | Insults | Massachusetts | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2009-05-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Stacy, Those Are Onion Rings
Girl to friend: They have vaginas in here!
Applebee's
Boise, Idaho
Overheard by: Sarah
...Does Hallmark Make a Card Saying That?
Girl to friend: Sorry about your vagina, but I'm sure the dog is okay.
Bar
Colorado
I Think I Took a Different San Francisco Tour
Girl to group of friends: And then he lifted up his skirt to reveal a fake vagina!
Comic Con
San Diego, California
Judge Me When You've Walked a Mile in My G-String, Okay?
Stripper, yelling at boyfriend: You don't have to shave your vagina everyday to get tips from bald, fifty-year-old men!
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: late night studier
Categories: Age and ageing | Default | Employees | Girls | Jobs & Careers | Money | Nebraska | Vagina | Posted 2009-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I Still Love The View
Petite, hip girl: Honestly, it's not that controversial.
Drama club kid: Yeah, it's just a woman saying "vagina."
Connecticut
Overheard by: ernaynay
Categories: Compare and contrast | Connecticut | Default | Girls | Hipsters | Kids | Vagina | Words | Posted 2009-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Isn't That, Like, Forbidden by the Bible?
Dude on cell: You are a liar. We talked about this before. (5 minutes later) Did you wash the red comforter? (pause) So you think I'm just going to sleep in the bed where she got her pussy juice?
Koreatown
Los Angeles, California
Nobody Can Do Sexual Harassment Like the Insane
Crazy bag lady, loudly: I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy! I don't suck dick for pussy!
(sits down next to another passenger on the subway)
Crazy bag lady, now in passenger's face: I don't suck dick for pussy!
(female passenger gets up and moves)
Crazy bag lady: Why you jumping? Why you jumping, bitch!? You weren't jumpin' last night when that guy put his long ass dick in you last night!
Female passenger: Excuse me, ma'am, don't say that to me! You don't know me!
(subway train stops)
Conductor: City Hall station!
Female passenger: Excuse me, sir, there's a crazy lady on the subway harassing the other passengers.
Conductor: Oh, could you point her out to me?
(female passenger points to crazy woman yelling)
Conductor: Ma'am, are you bothering people?
Crazy bag lady: Why you tryin' to fuck me standing up!? Why don't you fuck me lying down like a gentleman!
Conductor: Ma'am, I'm calling the police.
Broad Street Line Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Ass | BJs | Compare and contrast | Crazies | Default | Employees | Insults | Offers and requests | Penis | Pennsylvania | Public Transportation | Public transportation | Questions | Sex | Vagina | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2009-05-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Couldn't Be Any Prouder Of Myself If My Nipples Were Fountains Of Blood!
Blonde teenage girl: I already burnt my vagina today. Now my butt is bruised, too!
Brantford
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Jayme
Categories: Ass | Canadia | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teens | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2009-05-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Weirdest Game Of Tag Ever
(tiny girl sneaks behind a big, tall guy for a hug)
Big guy, startled: Whoa! Why did you hug me from behind?
Tiny girl: You told me you don't like hugging me from the front because my vagina touches you!
UC Irvine, California
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Girls | Guys | Questions | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2009-05-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Seen in Two Girls, One Cut
Male suit: Did you know that the most common cosmetic surgery these days is vaginal rejuvenation?
Female suit: "Vaginal rejuvenation," that's a mouthful.
Starbucks
New York
Overheard by: Caged Monkey
Nobody Ever Wins the Which-Sex's-Sex-Is-Best Argument
Straight girl: Butt sex, butt sex, butt sex!
Gay guy: You really love saying that, don't you?
Straight girl: Yes!
Gay professor: Do you prefer anal to vaginal!
Straight girl: Ewww, fuck no! I don't want anything in my asshole! See, I have a vagina. I have options, unlike gay men.
Gay professor: Ah, you'll never know the pleasures of prostate stimulation.
Westchester, New York
Choking to Death on Carbon Emissions Is a Masculine Rite Of Passage
Guy #1: Are you going to get a Prius?
Guy #2: Nah, I want a car with balls, not an environmentally friendly vagina.
Sunnyvale, California
Overheard by: GameCat
Categories: Balls | California | Default | Guys | Offers and requests | Questions | Technology | Vagina | Posted 2009-04-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And Scuttling Away, Like a Hermit Crab.
Female shopper, surveying bathing suits: The crotch in this looks a little, uh...narrow. Tiny, actually. I feel like it doesn't provide full coverage.
Sales girl: I know. It's sort of the style now, though.
Female shopper: What do you mean, "style"? My labia showing?
Other shopper, walking up: Yeah, I agree. I don't want my vagina suddenly falling out at the beach.
American Apparel, Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Celessa
Some Of Aesop's Morals Are More Helpful Than Others
Fat girl to thin girl pushing pram: Skinny men have skinny cocks.
England
Overheard by: Betsy
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | England | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Time My Penis Had a Break
Very drunk girl: I'm going to go pee with my vagina.
Venice, Florida
Doesn't Roto-Rooter Make Those?
Girl to friends: I'm normal when I'm single, but it's like my vagina is a dick-powered crazy machine!
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Herdy
Categories: Arizona | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Penis | Relationships | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Some Gay Guys Have No Idea How to Woo Each Other
Upset gay boy: This is awful. I just wanted you to see the giant vagina made of sand.
Virginia Tech
Whatever Queen Elizabeth Said Went
Teacher: Next, we're reading Much Ado about Nothing.
(class groans)
Teacher: Back then, "nothing" was slang for "vagina."
Class: Ooooh.
Enloe High
Raleigh, North Carolina
Categories: Books | Compare and contrast | Default | North Carolina | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teachers | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She's Old-Fashioned That Way
Male hipster to another: So, I was jerking off into this vagina...
Gastown
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: DagnyTaggart
Categories: Canadia | Default | Guys | Hipsters | Masturbation | Memory lane | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2009-03-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If Only There Were a Word for That...
Teenage girl: I can't figure out if he's gay or straight. Maybe he's, like, an equal-opportunity kind of guy?
20-something girl: Oh yeah, like, "Bring me your penises! Bring me your vaginas! None shall be turned away!"
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
At Least He Didn't Say "a Brown Shower"
Guy #1, walking down sidewalk: I really have to poo.
Guy #2, walking down sidewalk: Speaking of poo, I could use some poontang.
Random girl walking the other way: Oh my goodness!
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: Alexa
I Now Regret Having Deforested It
Girl to friend: My pussy's like a rain forest--dark, moist and full of mystery.
The Earl
Atlanta, Georgia
I Happen to Have an Eyedropper and PH Strip in My Pocket
Tipsy girl to friend on phone: Who are you talking to?
Friend, suspiciously: No one!
Tipsy girl: Do I need to monitor your drinking?
Friend: No!
Tipsy girl: Do I need to monitor your vagina?
Friend: No!
Tipsy girl: Good, cause I don't know how I would do that.
Drunken guy from end of the bar: I can do it!
Bar
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: three_eyed_fish
Categories: Bars & Clubs | California | Default | Drinking & drunks | Friends | Girls | Guys | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Always Muted the TV When President Bush Came on
Girl to guy: Do you really not know what a vagina sounds like?
Temple University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Sean Mc
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | Girls | Pennsylvania | Questions | Vagina | Posted 2009-03-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Jesus Rocks!
Guy: Dude, he gets so much pussy and he doesn't even want it.
Skytrain
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Arthur
Its Barq's Is Worse Than Its Bite
Girl in bathroom: Fuck! My pussy smells like root beer!
BJ's
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: nyssa
Categories: Default | Drinking & drunks | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Oregon | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2009-02-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When the Elderly Are Exposed to Adam Corolla
Old lady to grown daughter: Well you know what your brother's problem is? He's pussy-whipped!
San Jose, California
Categories: California | Default | Family ties | Old folks | Questions | Vagina | Women | Posted 2009-02-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Concise Recap of The Bootyguard
20-something #1: She's got fuckin' guns pointed at her vagina.
20-something #2: What?
20-something #1: No, dude. Seriously.
Palms, California
I'm Just a Trust, but Verify Kind Of Gal
College girl: Yeah, but I don't fuck my kids.
Friend: Well, you don't have any yet.
College girl, looking down: I can't believe I just checked my vagina before I answered that.
College Campus
SoCal, California
Categories: California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Friends | Girls | Kids | Sex | Students | Vagina | Posted 2009-01-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Happy Outcome Of the War on Pubic Hair
Guy exiting art class to female friend: I sleep through that whole class. It's all I can do.
Girl: What about when she asks attendance questions?
Guy: Well, I wake up for that part. It's just... God, I hate her! She's always talking about vaginas! And I'm just like, "Hello! I know what a vagina looks like!"
Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama
Ummm... No
Chubby goth girl (gasping): Oh, shit! (spills her coffee)
Skinny punk chick: Did you burn yourself?
Chubby goth girl: No, but I bet my snatch smells like chocolate now.
Skinny punk chick: That's sexy.
Starbucks
Lakeport, California
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Drinking & drunks | Girls | Goths | Punks | Sexuality | Vagina | Posted 2009-01-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So in This Case, It's Acceptable
Female passerby: Unless you can see an arm dangling out of her vagina, you should never ask a woman if she's pregnant!
Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Overheard by: Renizzle
Tonight's Movie: Bend It Like Bitchy
Girl wearing cleats: What would you do if I cleated you in the vagina?
Friend: Why would you do that?
Girl wearing cleats: No, really, like what if I cleated you right in the labia?
Baltimore, Maryland
That Paperclip Chain Won't Build Itself, You Know
Woman on cell: You know, Corey, when I get a call at work saying my son has been stabbed, I expect it to be more than just a puncture wound. Don't waste my time with that shit.
Florence, Kentucky
Overheard by: Jesus Freak
...Searching for the Mitten He'd Lost
Mom to teenage daughter: Yeah, they swell up big, you shoulda seen it, looked like I had a pussy on my hand.
Courtroom
Houston, Texas
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Hands | Health & Hygiene | Moms | Teens | Texas | Vagina | Posted 2008-12-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sounds Great. Really. My People Will Call Your People
Drunk girl: You cough up a ring, and I'll cough up my vagina.
Sacramento, California
Categories: California | Default | Drunks | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-12-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Summer's Eve Box: Have It Your Vajayway
Girl #1: So I saw you had some summer's eve in your bathroom earlier... Do you have a douche?
Girl #2: I saw that when I was in there too! It's not a douche. I looked at the box. It's just wipes.
Girl #1: Why would you need wipes?
Girl #3: You know when you eat a hamburger and have ketchup on your face, so you use a napkin to wipe it off? Well it's just like that, but it's for your vagina!
Appleton, Wisconsin
The Keebler Elves Say They Need the Yeast
Drunk girl to drunk friend: Unless you live in my vagina, you wouldn't know!
Springfield, Illinois
Overheard by: Random Bar Guy
74
Maternity nurse to nursing students: I mean, how many fingers do I want in my vagina in twelve hours?
Clinton Township, Michigan
Just Lucky, I Guess
Girl: She has vagina legs.
Guy friend: How does she have vagina legs?
Texas Christian University
Fort Worth, Texas
Categories: Body parts | Colleges & Universities | Default | Girls | Guys | Questions | Texas | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-11-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like Canadian Jumping Beans
Guest lecturer: My pants are animate, socks are inanimate.
Linguistics professor: Did you just say your pants are animate?
Guest lecturer: Yes, if it's near your genitals it's animate.
Winnipeg
Manitoba
Canadia
Overheard by: Breanne
Categories: Balls | Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Questions | Teachers | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-11-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Can't a Girl Do an Underwearless Can-Can Without Public Scrutiny?
Ghetto lady to two young boys: Stop lookin at my pussy!
20 Bus
Denver, Colorado
Overheard by: nightfallcub
Some Birthday Wishes Are More Complex Than Others
Girl on cell: I hope that I am never in the position where I need to ask your mother about your sister's vagina, my dear.
Wisconsin
Overheard by: Sara
Categories: Default | Family ties | Feelings | Girls | On the phone | Vagina | Weirdness | Wisconsin | Posted 2008-10-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Tonight on Fox: Rapunzel--the True Story
College chick to friend: With my luck I'll be the girl with the twenty-foot clitoris.
Boulder, Colorado
Overheard by: ORLY
Perhaps the Little Beret Was a Poor Idea?
Girl #1: Yeah, so, my vagina keeps talking to me.
Girl #2: Really? What does it say?
Girl #1: I don't know--it keeps speaking French.
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by: just trying to get a muffin
Categories: Default | Friends | Gender issues | Girls | Language barrier | Overheard at McGill | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Tonight on Origami Mami
Redhead: That's why I couldn't be a lesbian. Too many folds of flesh... It's like a mystery box of angry.
Federal Hill
Providence, Rhode Island
Overheard by: Katie M agrees
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Rhode Island | Sexuality | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-10-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You'll Look for Any Excuse to Reference That Song
Girl #1 (talking about her relationship): Yup, I'm pussy whipped. Or...what's the male equivalent for "pussy whipped"?
Girl #2: Well, there's that Ian Dury song that goes "hit me with your rhythm stick", so maybe something along those lines.
Sabiá Bar
Sao Paulo
Brazil
I Preferred the Chef Boyardee Phase
Girl: My cooter smells like Zoodles...
North Bay
Ontario
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Default | Food | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Sensory experiences | Vagina | Posted 2008-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
God: La La La La La--Can't Hear You!
(guy grabs girl's hand and licks cotton candy off her finger and licks finger)
Girl: Be careful, you don't where these fingers have been.
Guy: Well, I know last night they were in your vagina.
Girl: Shhh! People can hear you!
Guy: No one's even listening to us!
San Diego, California
Categories: Advice | California | Default | Etiquette | Girls | Guys | Masturbation | Sexuality | Vagina | Posted 2008-09-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And We Could Finally Use Pick-up Lines About "Magic Carpet Rides"
Guy #1: Yo, it would be tight to work in a rug store.
Guy #2: Yeah, man. All those different kinds of rugs...
Oakland, California
Overheard by: archidork
Categories: California | Default | Guys | Hair | Jobs & Careers | Vagina | Wishes | Words | Posted 2008-08-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Know What I Mean
Girl to friend: I gave my ostrich a fur coat.
Rich Catholic Girls School
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Sarah
Categories: Default | Euphemisms | Girls | Hair | Missouri | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Vagina | Posted 2008-08-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Last Time I Tried That, the Other Girl and I Both Ended Up with Concussions
(women's restroom, a man in a Santa suit enters)
Drunk woman: Hey, you're not a boy!
Restroom attendant: You mean he's not a girl.
Drunk woman: Yeah, you're not a girl!
Drunk Santa: Ho ho ho, ladies! I just wanted to see what you wanted for Christmas!
Drunk woman: Huh?
Restroom attendant: I want money, haha!
Drunk Santa: Then cross your labia, ladies, and merry Christmas!
(he leaves)
Drunk woman: Wait, what?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Elizabeth
They're Instant YouTube Celebrities
Little boy (chanting loudly): My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt! My penis and my butt, butt, butt, butt, butt!
Little girl: But I don't have a penis.
Both: My vagina and my butt! My vagina and my butt...
Ashland, Oregon
Overheard by: Kelly
Seems to Keep Dad at Bay
Two-year-old girl: Mommy! You have hair on your vagina!
Restroom
Washington, DC
Even When It's Minty-Fresh
Guy to girlfriend: Okay! I promise I won't talk about the smell of your vagina ever again.
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Assholes | Default | Guys | Massachusetts | Vagina | Posted 2008-07-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Billy Mays Has No Personal Life
Man to woman: When was the last time you waxed your saddle?
Caltrain, San Francisco to Palo Alto
Overheard by: Sarks
Categories: Default | Euphemisms | Guys | Questions | San Francisco | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Experiment Sounds Faulty, but Fun
Loud girl #1: I totally don't sweat at all.
Loud girl #2: Really? I don't believe you. Let me feel your vagina.
BART
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: MW
Categories: California | Default | Girls | Sensory experiences | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2008-07-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Assuming We Can Find It
Student during modern world history class: Well I think the clit would be a good place to go now.
USMMA
Kings Point, New York
That's the Last Time I'll Call the Psychic Friends Network
Ghetto girl on cell: I don't care what the fuck they said... They don't know shit 'bout my coochie!
McArthur Center
Norfolk, Virginia
Overheard by: wes
Categories: Black people | Default | Girls | Gripes | On the phone | Vagina | Virginia | Women | Posted 2008-07-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which Just Means It's Ripe
Girl on cell: She said that she used her vibrator so much last week, she thought her vagina was going to swell up and fall off.
Walmart
Atlanta, Georgia
Our Prediction: Advertising Will Eventually Convince You That You Do
Girl #1 to friend (indicating a cream to get rid of razor burn bumps on the bikini area): Does this stuff work okay?
Girl #2: Yeah, it works, it just smells kinda funny.
Girl #1: I don't care how it smells, it's goin' next to my vagina. I don't need no strawberries.
Target
Winchester, Virginia
Overheard by: Kendra
There Were Also Doubloons in There
Female shoplifting defendant: I'm just saying I didn't have a vagina full of jewelry in 2005.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: woof
Categories: Default | Overheard in PDX | Vagina | Women | Posted 2008-07-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Next Cosmo Cover Story
Loud girl on cell: You better start showing me some respect before you start licking my friends' clits!
Perkin's
St Cloud, Minnesota
Overheard by: Jesi
Which Is Why Men Wear Pink Shirts
Professor: Ever wonder why pink is considered a girl color?
Student: Because vaginas are pink.
UC
Santa Cruz, California
Overheard by: Kelly
Categories: California | Class | Default | Education | Gender issues | Questions | Students | Teachers | Vagina | Posted 2008-06-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Maybe Just Take It to a George Clooney Movie
Girl on cell: We're going to vibe her vagina. Well, not vibe it.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: K
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | On the phone | San Francisco | Toys | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Next Time Put the Message in a Bottle
Girl in stall: I have paper stuck in my vagina.
Friend: You might not want to say that, there's people here.
Girl in stall: Why is vagina a bad word?
Ladies Room, Foreplay Bar
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: How did it get there?
The Question Every Rock Of Love Contestant Must Eventually Face
College-aged girl on cell: How am I supposed to date him if I'm afraid he's going to kill me and keep my vagina in a jar?
Grocery Store, Kentucky
With the Possible Exception of the Dominant Chord
Professor: So, how was survey of western music?
Girl: It was terrible: someone would always find a way to bring up gender issues. I mean, I hate to break it to you, but eighteenth century tonal music doesn't give a shit about your vagina.
Sarah Lawrence College
Bronxville, New York
And Don't Even Get Me Started on This Banana Lamp
[Two 18-year-old girls are browsing a table full of random items for sale at a Christian thrift store at a local church.]
Girl #1: This candle holder would probably feel great inside my pussy.
Girl #2, barely startled: Haha. Yeah.
Girl #1: Ooh, this shirt is nice!
Gothenburg
Sweden
Overheard by: Donny Boots
Categories: Clothes | Etiquette | Girls | Masturbation | Sensory experiences | Stores | Sweden | Toys | Vagina | Posted 2008-05-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Have the Cutest Little Subway
[Girl hugging a guy.]
Girl: Eew, you smell like vagina.
Guy: Oh no, that's just Philadelphia.
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Overheard by: EavesdropDC
Categories: Compare and contrast | Eavesdrop DC | Geography | Girls | Guys | Sensory experiences | Vagina | Posted 2008-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Really Shouldn't Discriminate Against People Who Try to Kill You
Jewish man: I am not sexist!
Jewish man's friend: You are so sexist Archie Bunker is embarrassed.
Jewish man: I'm not sexist. I'll stab a chick in her junk!
Israeli Martial Arts Class
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: Ari
Categories: Class | Compare and contrast | Friends | Gender issues | Jews | Missouri | TV shows | Vagina | Violence | Weirdness | Posted 2008-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In Some Cultures, That's the Highest Compliment
Drunk girl yelling to bald guy from car window: You left your toupee in my vagina!
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: Paige & Liz