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Now I'm Working on a Novel About Them
Suit on the Taipei subway: After I went home that day, I kept thinking about hemorrhoids.
Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Yugan
Lucy and Ethel Have a Serious Falling-out
Well dressed woman on cell: No, no, no. That's the problem, I can't just shoot her because she is on my property. She has to be like breaking into the house or something... We'll have to find another way.
Maket East Train Station
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Crimes | Default | On the phone | Pennsylvania | Suits | Train | Violence | Women | Posted 2008-06-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Michael Jackson: At Least I'm Consistent!
Woman talking on phone to friend: I have a real thing for little boys. I never used to...
Train Leaving Brighton
England
Overheard by: Wishing she hadn't tuned in at that point
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | England | Feelings | Kids | On the phone | Sexuality | Train | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2008-06-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Who You Callin' a Dias?
Old man with mullet to brown child in stroller: Buenos dias, niñito.
Woman pushing stroller: We're black. He knows English.
Gallivan Center Trax Station
Salt Lake City, Utah
Their Lips Say "Shut Up" But Their Eyes Say "Play On!"
Young woman, after graphic conversation about sex and drugs: Do you ever think, while we're talking: "Wow, the people on the train are so lucky to get to listen to us on their morning commute!"?
Older woman: Oh my god, all the time.
Train
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: catherine
Categories: Australia | Compliments | Default | Old folks | Pride | Public Transportation | Questions | Train | Women | Posted 2008-06-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But, More Importantly, Why Is Your Subway Outside?
Guy with luggage: What's the temperature tonight?
Guy without luggage: Two.
Guy with luggage: Two? Two! Why the fuck do people live here!?
Brown Line
Chicago, Illinois
The Water-Walking, Fig-Tree-Blasting Badass from Nazareth
Freshman theater student: So we were in acting class and we did this exercise where we had to portray mythological creatures, and afterwards when we were telling the class what we were, this one kid said: "I was Jesus!"
MBTA
Boston, Massachusetts
Everyone's a Beautiful Woman After 12 Tequila Shots
Drunk guy on cell: Dad, I can't talk right now, I'm surrounded by FBI agents, but I've got your $100, your beer, and your marijuana. Oh, and your toilet paper. [Pause.] No, dad, FBI agents. [Pause.] I don't know, they're all beautiful women.
B Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Beauty | Crimes | Default | Drugs | Drunks | Family ties | Guys | Massachusetts | Money | Offers and requests | On the phone | Sexuality | Train | Posted 2008-06-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Jesus Was to Vex Mary His Entire Life
Mother, exiting trolley, to her son: Okay, come on, there's people behind us.
Son: I want to say goodbye!
Mother: Oh, god.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Education | Etiquette | Kids | Kids | Moms | Offers and requests | Pennsylvania | Public Transportation | Train | Wishes | Words | Posted 2008-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Only That One Time, When We Were Stuck in Traffic
Small boy: It's fire!
His mother: That is your umbrella. It is not a sword or weapon of any kind.
Small boy: It's underpants!
Trolley
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
And in a Jar in the Office Fridge
Large black dude on cell: What?!... Okay... His sperm is alive and well and kicking.
BART
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Nate
Categories: Black people | Cum | Guys | On the phone | Train | Words | Posted 2008-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Can You Picture Martha Stewart on a Public Bus?
Thug #1: Why the hell are you going all the way to back of the train car? Why don't we sit in the front like that Martha Stewart woman?
Thug #2: What the fuck are you talking about Martha Stewart?
Thug #1: You know, she stood up for herself on the bus? Wait, who was that? Not Martha Stewart?
Orange Line at Downtown Crossing
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: drunkbigirls
And I'd Lose the Best Piano Teacher I've Ever Had
Guy #1: I woke up in her bed without any pants.
Guy #2: What happened?
Guy #1: I think we had sex.
Guy #2: You don't know?
Guy #1: I cant exactly remember. Luckily neither can she. She'd kill me if she knew.
Train
Sydney, Australia
I'm Not Sure Hocking Your VCR Quite Counts
Thuggish teen to friends: Yeah, I'm going antiquing this weekend. For at least an hour.
Orange Line Train
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
It's Difficult Not to Violate One's Parole in Pennsylvania
Guy on train: It's a stone edifice! You can't wear a t-shirt in a stone edifice!
Train
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Spazzy
Categories: Clothes | Etiquette | Offers and requests | Pennsylvania | Train | Posted 2008-05-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Looked Like He Might Be Manorexic
Teen girl on cell: I saw this guy with a man tramp stamp... A mamp stamp.
Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: sadie
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | On the phone | Tattoos | Teens | Train | Words | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The First Time in History a Bang from Behind Has Resulted in Pregnancy
Middle-aged guy: Yeah, I've been in a couple of accidents before. One time this lady rear-ended me out of nowhere.
Middle-aged woman: Did you sue her?
Middle-aged guy: Of course I did. How do you think we paid for in-vitro?
Newark Airtrain, New Jersey
At the Sexual Deviants' Auction
Ballet girl: Do you know how much our feet are worth?!
West Leederville Train Station
Perth
Western Australia
Overheard by: Rose
Either That or a Hysterical Woman Tied to the Train Tracks
Old nag, as train breaks down: Why'd we stop? What's wrong?
Fellow commuter: We hit a buffalo.
Old nag: Really?!
Fellow commuter: Yes.
Worcester/Framingham Line to Boston, Massachusetts
I'm So Sneaking into the Men's Locker Room!
Girl on train: I usually do my arms, but then I look at Jane and her hairy arms and think, Man, if she can do it, I can, too!
Shout-out: overheardinsydney.blogspot.com
Categories: Australia | Beauty | Body parts | Overheard in Sydney | Public transportation | Train | Posted 2007-06-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Take That Back or I'll Give You an Atomic Wedgie Right Here
Late 20s drone in front of train operator's door: Excuse me, can you move forward? The operator said I'm blocking the window.
Late 40s suit: No, you move forward. This is my spot.
Late 20s drone: We're both blocking the window, and I can't move unless you do.
Late 40s suit: I'm not moving.
Late 20s drone, groaning: You're an ass.
Late 40s suit: No, you're an ass.
Late 20s drone, pushing past: Oh, fuck you.
Late 40s suit, mocking: Oh, fuck you.
Late 20s drone: Good luck in third grade.
BART train, Bay Point - Daly City line
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: baby boomers must die
Categories: Insults | Jerks | San Francisco | Strangers | Train | Posted 2007-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Everyone There Has Given Up on Life Anyway
Father: Honey, you can't cry on the train. The conductor will kick us off.
Young daughter, crying: Can I cry on the bus?
Father, after thoughtful pause: Sure, you can cry on the bus.
MBTA Green Line
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Joe
Categories: Dads | Lies | Massachusetts | Parenting | Train | Posted 2007-05-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
