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As Seen in Little People, Big Bummer

Very tall boy on Taipei subway: You don't need to diet, you need to grow taller.
Very short girl: I would if I could.
Very tall boy: Do you want to go to the concert?
Very short girl: I don't go to concerts.
Very tall boy: Why not?
Very short girl: I can never see anything.

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan Dali


Categories: Advice | Diet & weight | Girls | Guys | Other sites | Taiwan | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-06 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

That Still Doesn't Explain Yao Ming

Guy to friend: If one person is about 1.5 meters tall, two people would be three hundred meters.

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan Dali


Categories: Friends | Guys | Other sites | Science | Stupidity | Posted 2010-01-01 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Besides, Greed Stains.

Woman #1 in central Taipei: When she went to the us, she took along several boxes of detergent, because she doesn't like the smell of American detergent.
Woman #2: Yeah, I wouldn't want to smell like an American either.

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan

I Still Got All Muddy, But I Was Paid for It.

Office worker: Well, I almost went to Woodstock, but then an opportunity to make money came up.

Shout-out: evadne-noel.livejournal.com


Categories: Compare and contrast | Coworkers | Money | Music | Other sites | Posted 2009-06-21 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

At Least She Correctly Identified Them As Birds.

High school girl, looking at seagulls feeding: That ain't crows, them are ducks!

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan


Categories: Birds | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Language barrier | Other sites | Students | Posted 2009-06-10 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Fuck It, You Know What? I Did

Guy on cell: Did they sell their house? (pause) Ohhh, they couldn't sell the house! (pause) Yeah...that makes sense! Ain't nobody can't get credit now, ho! (pause) Wait, I didn't mean to call you a ho, grandma.

Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com


Categories: Default | Family ties | Guys | Insults | Other sites | Questions | Posted 2009-01-18 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

And Did You Bring Enough for Everyone?

Professor at anatomy lecture to student touching her own throat: Ivanova, what are you gonna be touching when I'm lecturing on the sex organs?

Shout-out: anekdot.mail.ru


Categories: Body parts | Default | Education | Other sites | Questions | Sex | Teachers | Posted 2009-01-15 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Pussyfooting

Girl to friend: Is that why you were screaming? I knew it was more than just fingering!

Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Eavesdrop DC


Categories: Default | Feelings | Girls | Other sites | Sensory experiences | Sex | Weirdness | Posted 2009-01-13 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

In T9 for Two

Girl to friends in line for bathroom: That's going to be the next chapter of the book: Boys Who Text But Won't Have Sex!

Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Eavesdrop DC


Categories: Books | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Names | Other sites | Sex | Posted 2009-01-12 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

If You Figure This One Out, Let Us Know

Tayal tribesman bus driver: Sir, do you want to get off at this stop?
Old man: Yes, I want off at this stop, I am going to the dentist's.
Bus driver: What's wrong?
Old man: I have to have a tooth pulled. Can you believe that? I'm 82 but I still have to have a tooth pulled.
Bus driver: If you're going to have one pulled, you may as well have a bunch taken out.
Old man: That won't do, false teeth are expensive.
Bus driver: Then have boar tusks put in.
Old man: Boar tusks?
Bus driver (very earnestly): Yes, you can have two tusks put in on the lower jaw, and when they grow, they'll look great! (uses his fingers to demonstrate how the tusks would look growing out of his mouth)
Old man (laughing): It would take a long time for them to grow.
Bus driver: Not long! You're an old boar, but I'm just a young boar, so yours would grow much faster than mine!
(old man gets off bus laughing cheerfully)

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan Dali

In This Month's Cosmo: "How to Get Guys to Watch Chick Flicks"

Girl: Yeah, but he has a really nice penis. I like to play with it while we watch movies.

overheardattcnj.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Overheard at TCNJ


Categories: Beauty | Compliments | Default | Girls | Movies | Other sites | Penis | Time Management | Posted 2008-11-24 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Not the Worst Thing He Could Mean by "The Whacker"

Sunday school teacher (showing picture of Good Shepherd): Who can tell me who this is?
Kid: That's Jesus with the whacker!
Teacher (puzzled): You mean he takes the sheep out for a walk?
Kid (pointing to the shepherd's crook): No, when one of the sheep tries to get away from Jesus, he whacks them with it so they won't go!

Shout-out: overheardintheward.blogspot.com


Categories: Default | Jesus | Kids | Other sites | Questions | Religion | Students | Teachers | Violence | Words | Posted 2008-10-05 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Now I'm Working on a Novel About Them

Suit on the Taipei subway: After I went home that day, I kept thinking about hemorrhoids.

Shout-out: talovich.blogspot.com

Overheard by: Yugan


Categories: Ass | Fears | Maladies | Other sites | Suits | Taiwan | Train | Posted 2008-06-28 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook

Watch Her Do What, Exactly?

Man on cell: One needs to do two things: Read Tolstoy and watch Paris Hilton.

Shout-out: lefulelve.freeblog.hu

Who Remembers Who Started It? The Important Thing Is We're Going to Finish It

Five-year-old boy walking past deli: Awww... Why do they have to kill chickens?
Seven-year-old sister: Because the chicken is the natural enemy of man.

Maryland

Overheard by: Gary Lewis


Categories: Animals | Other sites | Philosophy | Should have used a condom | Posted 2007-03-27 EmailQuoteLinkDel.icio.us Facebook