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Mom Put the "C" in "ROTC"
Geek #1: So, was your mom a very loose woman when she was in college?
Geek #2: Well, not really, but back when she was in the military, she was.
Morgantown, West Virginia
Overheard by: Mint
Categories: Dorks, Geeks & Nerds | Family ties | Questions | Sexuality | Weirdness | West Virginia | Posted 2011-03-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Lesbian Girl Scouts Are Always Prepared
Woman, trying to hush crying baby: Shhhhh... It's okay.
College girl: Ma'am, I am prepared to set fire to your child.
Parkersburg, West Virginia
The Two Types Of People: Encapsulated.
Mom: Oh, no... A dead chipmunk.
Small child: Yay! A dead chipmunk!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Categories: Animals | Death & dying | Family | Feelings | Happiness | Kids | West Virginia | Posted 2010-12-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Be Fair, at Least She Won't Be a Cop.
Fat female student: I'm thirty-eight years old with a criminal justice degree, and I still can't find nothin' to do in this valley. Nobody's hirin', nothin'.
Skinny female student: Couldn't you just be a cop?
Fat female student: I can't be a cop. They give me a badge an' a gun, I'd be shootin' at fags and wetbacks. I mean, in this day in age... Not to be rude or anything...
Bookstore
West Virginia University
Categories: Age and ageing | Colleges & Universities | Education | Fat people | Jobs & Careers | Skinny people | Students | Violence | West Virginia | Posted 2010-09-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Look, an Erection!
Small-chested hiking girl: Damn! Hey, you'd wipe the sweat off my boobs, right?
Busty hiking girl: Only if you wipe mine.
Small-chested hiking girl: Somehow I think I'm going to have to do a lot more work.
Hiking boy: Uhhh...
Fort Boreman Park Hiking Trails
Parkersburg, West Virginia
Categories: Compare and contrast | Girls | Guys | Offers and requests | Rack | Sensory experiences | West Virginia | Posted 2010-08-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Don't Know-- Are You Thinking Of Asking Me to Prom?
Sane-looking girl: Okay, so let's say that your boyfriend died a while back, right? Then he comes back as a zombie, like a real walking corpse. But he doesn't want to eat your brains or anything, he just wants to graduate high school and be your boyfriend again so he can go to prom with you. So, do you take him back?
Boy: Um... Has this actually happened to you?
High School Cafeteria
West Virginia
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Death & dying | Education | Girls | Guys | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Weirdness | West Virginia | Wishes | Zombies | Posted 2010-05-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Fair Enough
Guy: I was a dragon in my past life.
Girl: Did you have sex with other dragons?
Guy: Of course.
High School Gym
West Virginia
Overheard by: Kimber
Categories: Animals | Default | Girls | Guys | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sex | Weirdness | West Virginia | Posted 2009-01-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
No One Respects the President Anymore
Guy on headset: I'll talk to you later. I hope your speech impediment improves.
Vienna, West Virginia
Categories: Default | Education | Guys | Language barrier | West Virginia | Wishes | Posted 2009-01-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like a Good-Karma Chameleon?
College guy #1: I can't believe I wasn't invited to the wedding.
College guy #2: Maybe if you'd eat another lizard.
Clancy's Irish Pub
Keyser, West Virginia
Overheard by: Millicent Bystander
Categories: Advice | Bars & Clubs | Default | Feelings | Food | Frat boy types | Guys | West Virginia | Posted 2008-11-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Can Always Play Canasta Again Later
Guy to friend returning from bathroom: (distraught) But I wanted to be the one to do it with you! I wanted to be the one to do it with you!
Gables Night Club
Inwood West Virginia
Overheard by: joanna
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Default | Feelings | Friends | Guys | Sexuality | West Virginia | Wishes | Posted 2008-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Happened to the Other.... Actually, I Don't Wanna Know
New homeowner: Did you ever find out what was causing that smell?
Worker: Yep.
New homeowner: What was it?
Worker: I'm not gonna tell ya.
New homeowner: Come on, what was it?
Worker, with a serious face and tone: You've got about four and a half to five opossums underneath your house.
Huntington, West Virginia
Overheard by: Jess
Categories: Animals | Clients | Construction workers | Death & dying | Health & Hygiene | Questions | Sensory experiences | West Virginia | Posted 2008-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Directly Correlated with Whiteness, Except in New Jersey
College chick: You cannot do a scientific study to see which city is the least gangster!
Rally's
Charleston, West Virginia
Overheard by: gudo
Categories: Chicks | Gripes | West Virginia | Posted 2007-12-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You'll Love the Electric Highchair, Buddy
Happy dad to little kid: Capital punishment is fun!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Categories: Dads | Happiness | Lies | West Virginia | Posted 2007-12-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Gummed My Sausage
Old lady to old man, as breakfast is served: Today has been an interesting day. Somebody ate half my pancake!
Morgantown, West Virginia
Categories: Food | Old folks | West Virginia | Posted 2007-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Enough to Keep Me in Sneakers for Chasing Ambulances
Lawyer to another: So, how much do you charge for a malicious wounding?
Party
Charleston, West Virginia
Categories: Coworkers | Questions | West Virginia | Posted 2007-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And If You Do, Don't Follow Its Instructions
Five-year-old girl in stall: Mommy, there's lots of writing in here...
Mother in adjacent stall: Uh-huh... Don't read it...
Truck stop
Charleston, West Virginia
Categories: Advice | Kids | Moms | West Virginia | Posted 2007-10-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Characterized by Its Covalent Bonds and Little Pitchfork
Professor: Today we're going to be synthesizing a 6,6 nylon molecule. Who can tell me where the sixes come from?
Student: The devil!
Professor: Very good. Note the dreaded mark of the polymer beast.
Chemistry lab, Concord University
Athens, West Virginia
Overheard by: I'm also failing chemistry
Categories: Education | Teachers | West Virginia | Posted 2007-09-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
