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Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Montana But Were Afraid to Ask
Woman to kids, after explaining the basic importance of voting: And remember... We always vote Republican because the Democrats are godless.
Voting Line
Bozeman, Montana
Overheard by: Justin
You're So Deep, Monica.
Coffee shop girl: A pig is, like, a monkey's best friend.
Missoula, Montana
Overheard by: Evan
Categories: Animals | Compare and contrast | Girls | Montana | Relationships | Posted 2010-09-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If Your Editors Had a ShamWow, We Would Use It Every Day
Frat boy #1: Oh, dude, a ShamWow! (to friend at counter) Hey, should we get a ShamWow?
Frat boy #2, without looking at him: No.
Frat boy #1: But it's a ShamWow!
Frat boy #2: You're an idiot. (long pause) Fine, get the fucking ShamWow.
Frat boy #1: (excitedly runs ShamWow over to counter)
Frat boy #2: Fuck.
Pet's Mart, Montana
Overheard by: Sadie
How Catholicism Works: Explained
Stoner: If I had a brother--and he and your sister got married-- I would go over to their house all the time, and eat their food.
Great Falls, Montana
Categories: Default | Family ties | Food | Montana | Relationships | Stoners | Posted 2009-04-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yahoo Fetish Groups: "Ahem-- "Nobody"?"
Passenger #1: I broke up with my woman because she spends all her money on crack...she crazy.
Passenger #2: Ah, that's no good.
Passenger #1: I know...and pretty soon she gonna run out of money.
Passenger #2: Really?
Passenger #1: Yeah, I told her too many times ain't nobody gonna want a senior citizen as a prostitute.
Passenger #2: Damn.
Greyhound Bus
Montana
Categories: Bus | Compare and contrast | Default | Drugs | Guys | Money | Montana | Relationships | Posted 2009-03-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Unless "Dinner"'s the Name Of That Call Girl
Young boy: Where's daddy?
Mother: He's at home. Hypothetically he's starting dinner right now.
Slightly older boy: That's unlikely.
Bus
Bozeman, Montana
Meet the Hippest Kids in Montana
Tall adolescent: Peach sucks. Daisy's okay, but peach sucks.
Short adolescent: See, I've always been more of a toad fan. Even if he does look kind of like a circumcised wang.
Tall adolescent: Oh, you.
Missoula, Montana
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Games | Insults | Montana | Penis | Pop culture | Teens | Posted 2008-12-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Because at the Moment I'm a Good Dad
Voice across patio: So, I'm trying to be good mom, so I took the gonorrhea test. I'm all about the penis.
Billings, Montana
From What Your Dad Tells Me
Overenthusiastic principal: So, where'd ya guys go for lunch? Huh?
Jaded student (indicating Subway cup): I ate fresh.
Principal: Did you go the 6 inch route? Or the 12 inch?
Student: I, uhhh... 6.
Principal, grinning: Don't worry, Shane* -I think you're man enough to take a 12-inch.
Livingston, Montana
Or at Least Oprah
Mother: I'm going to sell you to the zoo.
Child: No, sell me to Jesus!
Billings, Montana
Overheard by: Amber
It's All in How You Color the States
Passenger #1 looking at map on screen: Oh, look -- we're over Montana right now.
Passenger #2: Montana's in Canada! Cool!
Over Montana, British Airways flight
Overheard by: Confused Flyer
Categories: Airports & flights | Idiots | Montana | Stupidity | Posted 2007-12-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Use the Other End
Drunk hetero: You're gay, he's gay, so what's the problem?
Drunk queer: He just threw up all over himself.
Drunk hetero: You take what you can get.
The White Front Bar
Philipsburg, Montana
Categories: Cleanliness | Drunks | Montana | Posted 2007-08-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sunday School Daycare?
20-ish girl: Where do you think is the best place to get molested?
Friend: Daycare?
Montana
If He's the Real Deal, He'll Forgive Me
Dude #1: Dude, did you just call Jesus a fag?
Dude #2: I did.
Billings, Montana
Overheard by: he really did
Doctor: Works Every Time
Cheerleader: So, I had this problem with peeing and I visited a doctor.
Friend: What did he say?
Cheerleader: You can't imagine... He wanted to see the effect, so I had to pee in front of him while he's watching me doing it!
Friend: Wow. I would freak out if that happened to me.
Classroom, Montana State University
Bozeman, Montana
Overheard by: Awesome Naveed
