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So Many Questions, So Little Time.
Boy #1: I shot my friend in the foot once.
Boy #2: What! How?
Boy #1: Well, we were really high in the woods, and my friend was wearing bunny slippers. He stuck his foot out of a bush and I thought it was a real rabbit... so I shot it!
Boy #2: What the fuck?!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McKenzie
Categories: Guys | Memory lane | San Francisco | Stupidity | Violence | Posted 2011-06-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Didn't You Read the Welcome Sign at the Airport?
Tourist: Wait, so you can't smoke cigarettes, but you can smoke pot?
Local guy: Welcome to California!
Golden Gate Park
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Arielle
Wait, Did You Just Say "Cock Clock"?
Guy #1: I hate Dylan*, he's such a cock clock, you should hear what he did.
Guy #2, first loudly then quietly: No, I've got a story for you! (mumbles story really quietly then gets loud again) So, I mean, it wasn't rape, she totally wanted it, she just happened to fall asleep in the middle.
Guy #1: I don't think this conversation is really appropriate at Burger King, there's kids around.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Brit-ta-nee
There Was an Unfortunate Incident With Jeffrey at Toys Я Us
Girl #1: I mean, there are those people who pretend to be so moral, and then you find out they're, like, fucking a giraffe.
Girl #2, laughing: Ew! That's disgusting.
Girl #3: Seriously, though, hypocrites suck.
Girl #2: But what would that feel like?
Girl #1: What, being a hypocrite?
Girl #2: No... You know... The giraffe.
Girl #3: Ew... Uhm, horrible?
Girl #2: Yeah, you're right.
(five minutes later, in the middle of another topic)
Girl #2: But really, I think it would depend on how old it was.
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: The giraffe.
Girl #1: Are you still thinking about fucking a giraffe?!?
Girl #3: We need to make sure she doesn't go to the zoo. That can only end badly.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: that sounds wholly unpleasant
Categories: Age and ageing | Animals | Compare and contrast | Feelings | Girls | Insults | San Francisco | Sex | Posted 2010-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If They Don't Perform, You Can Eat Them
Middle-aged guy to 20-something girl: You could hire chickens, they're not union!
BART
San Francisco, California
Categories: Birds | Girls | Guys | Jobs & Careers | San Francisco | Posted 2010-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Also How He Chooses a House Of Worship.
20-something guy, entering taqueria with friends: There better be a midget in a sombrero offering me salsa as soon as I get in the door, or I'm gonna be pissed.
San Francisco, Calfornia
Overheard by: Alex
Categories: Food | Friends | Guys | Restaurants | San Francisco | Stupidity | Threats | Weirdness | Posted 2010-08-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Was the Best Birthday Present Ever!
Man to wife: There were monkeys all over the pile of stuff in the guest room!
Street Fair
San Francisco, California
Categories: Animals | Couples | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2010-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's What You Said Outside That Jonas Brothers Concert!
Girl to friend, after unsuccessfully trying to open locked front doors: Maybe they'll let us in if we bang hard enough.
High School
San Francisco, California
Categories: Advice | Friends | Girls | San Francisco | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Weirdness | Posted 2010-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Agree, at Least in Principle
20-something on cell: So I said to her, "I don't care if you are my stepsister: if you shaved it, I want to see it!"
San Francisco, California
Categories: Family ties | Health & Hygiene | On the phone | San Francisco | Shaving | Vagina | Posted 2010-07-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Two Types Of Party Girl, in a Nutshell
Brunette at party: We need more vodka!
Blonde: I have Ativan.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Drinking & drunks | Girls | Health & Hygiene | San Francisco | Posted 2010-06-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Gay Men Aren't the Target Demograpic for That?
Straight girl: So then we were making out, and it was really good...
Gay guy #1: Wait, isn't this story supposed to be about how good he was at going down on you?
Straight girl: Oh, I'm getting there.
Gay guy #2: Yeah, okay, but this is really taking too long. Get to the point.
Gay guy #1: Seriously. I mean, we don't really like hearing about straight hookups anyway. It's gross. We're just humoring you.
Guy guy #3: This is like the longest pussy-eating story I've heard all day.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: TMI
Categories: Fag hags | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Licking | Queers | San Francisco | Sex | Sexuality | Vagina | Posted 2010-06-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...So I Take Drugs
Guy: You've got to listen to your body.
Gal: But my body's such a whiny bitch.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Stephan Zielinski
Categories: Advice | Body parts | Girls | Guys | Insults | San Francisco | Posted 2010-05-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
San Francisco's Full Of Philosophical Idealists
Woman sitting in front of bank: Ya know, I don't believe in earthquakes...
Market Street
San Francisco, California
Categories: Philosophy | San Francisco | Weirdness | Women | Posted 2010-02-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Try Turning the Paper Right Side Up.
Student, raising hand: I can't read...
Professor: I'm sorry.
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: The Only One Laughing?
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Education | San Francisco | Students | Stupidity | Teachers | Posted 2010-01-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
These New Refrigeration Bras Are Fabulous
Middle-age woman to friend: We're smuggling beer! We're smuggling beer!
Fisherman's Wharf
San Francisco, California
Categories: Crimes | Drinking & drunks | Friends | San Francisco | Women | Posted 2010-01-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh, and I Finally Finished That Jigsaw Puzzle!
Woman on cell: Did I tell you the baby died? No?! When did we last talk?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Wil
Categories: Death & dying | Kids | On the phone | Questions | San Francisco | Women | Posted 2010-01-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which One Of These Makes More Sense to You Says a Lot About You As a Person
Young man: You were in the same gay motorboat?
Girl: No! We were in the same getting-better boat.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: sydblair
Categories: Girls | Guys | Questions | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2009-12-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Loved the Dirges.
Guy in leather to another: I remember when I was a slave...
Dore Alley
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Out taking photos
Categories: Guys | Kink | Memory lane | San Francisco | Sexuality | Weirdness | Posted 2009-12-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Why Do You Think I'm Gay?
Crying girl: I have always wanted to have kids, you know? Now I can't.
Friend: It's really not that bad.
Crying girl: No, the doctor said I can never get pregnant!
Friend: Look at it this way: you can have tons of sex and never have to worry about it. I think it's a pretty sweet deal!
Random guy: I agree with you, sista.
San Francisco, California
Moral: Never Ask Someone "Why Are You Walking Like That?"
Girl to friend: It's like karma in the butt, you know?
Friend: (pained expression on face, agreeing)
San Francisco, California
You Really Get a Little Something Extra When You Go Away to School in San Francisco
Professor: It's hard to have an orgy without orgasms. What? It's true! What're you gonna do, play video games?
University of San Francisco
San Francisco, California
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Games | Orgasm | Questions | San Francisco | Sex | Teachers | Posted 2009-11-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oooh, Imagine How Sweaty Her Hand Got!
Weird guy: Did you guys have fun last night?
Weirder guy: Oh, yeah. She jerked me off. But I'm allergic to latex, so she used neoprene gloves from the lab where she works.
Weird guy: Niiiice.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: That sounds so unpleasant.
Categories: Crazies | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Maladies | Masturbation | Questions | San Francisco | Technology | Posted 2009-11-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How International Incidents Begin
Gate attendant over PA: This is the final boarding call for Singapore Airlines flight 123.
(announcement is repeated several times over there)
Different voice, over pa: Singapore airlines, could you please not make so many announcements?
Airport
San Francisco, California
Categories: Airports & flights | Employees | Offers and requests | Public Transportation | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2009-11-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Plastic Knives Tend to Hurt
Girl, crying or laughing: I just can't believe you love me; I have shown up on your doorstep so fucking wasted.
Guy: Baby, you found a plastic fork in your panties! It's okay! Anyway, it was not one of your better nights.
Girl: Actually, it was one of my better nights.
Mission District
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Judylicious
Categories: Clothes | Compare and contrast | Feelings | Girls | Guys | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2009-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Before She Finds Out You're a Mute!
Man walking down street: Dude... your woman just said "we need to talk." You need to get the fuck out of there right now!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Advice | Guys | Relationships | San Francisco | Posted 2009-10-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Are on Irony Overload
Wangsta on cell: Dude, how the hell am I supposed to carry a 14-inch Mickey Mouse piñata?
(short pause) Well, I guess I could just stuff it in my messenger bag.
University
San Francisco, California
Categories: Colleges & Universities | On the phone | Questions | San Francisco | Stupidity | Thugs | Toys | Posted 2009-09-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kid Surprises Are Fun, but Illegal
Woman #1, approaching register counter: Ooh! Kinder eggs! I love those things!
Woman #2: What are they?
Woman #1: They're chocolate! With something inside!
Cashier: They're hollow chocolate eggs.
Woman #1: With a surprise inside!
Woman #2: Ew!
Cashier: It's a toy.
Woman #2: Oh. A toy.
Cashier: Whoa, okay, just imagine you were a kid again, and what a surprise meant when you were a kid.
Woman #2: I know... I know. It's just, adult surprises are never fun.
Woman #1, walking out of store: What were you thinking it was going to be? A penis that would squirt all over you?
Woman #2: You never know! Adult surprises are always bad!
San Francisco, California
What If It's an Acquired Taste?
Woman #1: Hey, check this out.
Woman #2: What? Gross! Is that bacon? Is there really bacon in there?
Woman #1: Looks like it.
Cashier: I haven't personally tried it, but everyone who has says it's really good.
Woman #1: I bet it is!
Woman #2: No way. I mean... that's just too weird. Bacon? In chocolate? That's almost like bisexuality: I want to try it, but, I don't.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Compare and contrast | Employees | Food | San Francisco | Sexuality | Weirdness | Wishes | Women | Posted 2009-08-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Martha Stewart: "It's a Good Thing."
Dominatrix: The best s&m tool of all time is the Williams Sonoma Spoontula.
Good Vibrations
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Compare and contrast | Kink | San Francisco | Shopping | Women | Posted 2009-08-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Next Step: Getting Rid Of This Mullet
Woman #1, watching hobo in a dress: You know, I finally feel like I'm a metropolitan woman.
Woman #2: Why? Gotten used to the traffic, crowds, pollution and public transportation?
Woman #1: Well, yeah, but that's not why. See that guy in that dress over there? When I first came to the city, I would have been amused or shocked to see something like that. Now, my first reaction is: "Those shoes and socks don't go with that dress--and Macy's isn't that far away. Dude, go get some pumps!" I mean, how often do you think I would have thought to say "dude, go get some pumps" when I was still living in Ohio? I'm living the dream!
Financial District
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: And the jacket didn't match either
Meet the Science Channel's Number One Fan
Geeky kid: A glass cutter? Oh. My. God. This is a glass cutter! It cuts glass!
(mom tries to shush him)
Geeky kid, whispering: A glass cutter!
Hardware Store
San Francisco, California
Categories: Kids | Moms | Parenting | San Francisco | Stores | Stupidity | Technology | Posted 2009-07-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Let the Nitpicking Begin!
Guy to girlfriend: You know, I got the crabs.
Girlfriend: Emm... okay.
Guy: Guess what?
Girlfriend: What?
Guy: You got 'em too, stupid!
San Francisco, California
Why Law & Order Doesn't Take Place in San Francisco
Young Asian cop easing old Asian man out of police car: My first day on the beat and already I'm finding out about and busting illegal Mahjong parlors! I didn't know they existed!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McF
Categories: Asians | Cops | Crimes | Games | Jobs & Careers | Old folks | San Francisco | Posted 2009-07-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Welcome to San Francisco
Dude to friend: And then I look over, and there's this giant white cock! (holds hands two feet apart)
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Missed the good part
Categories: Friends | Penis | Race | San Francisco | Posted 2009-07-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Not Even Sofia Bush?
Trolley driver, approaching Bush Street: Anyone for Bush? Then get off! Anyone? Anyone? (no one moves) Thank god!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Conductors | God | Politics | Questions | San Francisco | Posted 2009-06-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Somebody's Husband Wasn't Properly Fed and Watered
Hipster girl to friend: I heard the most offensive thing in Crate & Barrel!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Hipsters | Names | San Francisco | Sensory experiences | Posted 2009-06-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...When I Sat on His Face. What?
Girl #1: My 21st birthday was fun.
Girl #2: So was mine, minus the fact that my friends bought stuffed animal beavers at the winery and proceeded to yell about how soft and hairy their beavers were... While my dad was driving.
Girl #2's grandma: What's a beaver?
Girl #2's mom: It's...what some people call the female genitalia.
Girl #2's grandma: Ohhh...your grandfather used to just call it a cunt.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Age and ageing | Animals | Compare and contrast | Default | Family ties | Girls | Hair | Moms | Old folks | Questions | San Francisco | Vagina | Words | Posted 2009-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That Hamster Was Extremely Sooty
Gay dude: No, they're just too greasy for me.
Fag hag: Says the Mexican...
Gay dude: Excuse me? I'm black by insertion.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: i don't like water
Why They Were Kicked Out Of the National History Museum
Gay guy, gesturing at transvestite performing onstage: I don't want to see any more boobs. Show me the dicks!
Gay friends, approving: We want dicks!
DNA Lounge
San Francisco, California
Categories: Default | Friends | Guys | Offers and requests | Penis | Queers | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2009-06-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'd Say White Is Fairly Accurate
Son, yelling from back of bus: Mom, what color is Jewish?
Mother: (sinks lower into her seat, pretends not to hear)
Son, yelling again: Well...is it white? Is it tan?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Freda
Categories: Default | Family ties | Guys | Kids | Kids | Questions | Religion | San Francisco | Posted 2009-05-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...On the Eve Of Our Wedding.
Woman to friend: I don't know what her gender or sexuality is. I just can't believe she'd do that to me.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Freda
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Gender issues | Gripes | San Francisco | Sexuality | Women | Posted 2009-05-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
AIDS Is Too Political
Guy on cell: So I'm just sticking with gonorrhea...that way, no one will ask any questions.
Haight Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Adriana
Plastic Shoes with Holes in the Tops Make Much More Sense.
Girl #1, sifting through shirts on table: Oh my god, these v-necks are so freaking cute.
Girl #2: Yeah...if this one didn't have sharks on it. If there's one thing I hate is sharks. Who puts sharks on shirts nowadays, anyway?
Urban Outfitters
San Francisco, California
Guys' Moments Like That Generally Involve Porn
Curly-haired brunette: Do you ever have moments when you see someone on the street and think, "hmmm, that looks like someone I've seen in Facebook pictures!"?
Straight-haired brunette: Yeah. I also have moments when I see someone on the street and think, "haven't I slept with you?"
Curly-haired brunette: Heh. That's a classic.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Poogins
Might Have to Move to Seattle
Girl, shading eyes from sun: I did not consent to this brightness.
San Francisco, California
Fine, Japanese Concept Car. Whatever.
Woman on cell: Okay, I might be about to lose you because I'm in an elevator. (pause) I'm in an elevator--how could I be driving?
City College
San Francisco, California
Categories: Cell phones | Colleges & Universities | Default | Questions | San Francisco | Stupidity | Women | Posted 2009-02-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Meet the Last Old-School Guy in San Francisco
Girl on phone: So she had the baby, and now she's getting married.
Random guy walking by: Strike that, reverse it.
SFSU
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Veruca Salt
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Family ties | Girls | Guys | Relationships | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2009-02-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Except in Situations Involving Family Members, Minors, or Brett Michaels
Curly-haired woman on cell: My advice is to have sex in 90% of all situations.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Poogtastic
Tonight on E!: Shari Lewis and Lamb Chop, the Ugly Truth
Chick on cell: Let us shower together, damned sheep!
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Wait 'Til You Hear His Answer to "Are You Ready to Rock?"
Band, coming back onstage: How's everybody feeling?
(crowd whistles and applauds)
Lone male: Awkward!
Rickshaw Stop
San Francisco, California
At Least I've Stopped Singing the Score to The Mikado
Asian tranny, bowing to group of exiting patrons: Thank you, puh-rease come again!
Very femme male waiter, exasperated: Oh, shut up!
Restaurant
San Francisco, California
Categories: Asians | Compare and contrast | Default | Employees | Guys | Language barrier | Restaurants | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2009-02-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Don't Care If It Is Cardboard
50-something man to 50-something woman: You are not homeless. Homeless people don't own dinnerware!
BART Train
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Morpheus
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Food | Guys | San Francisco | Train | Words | Posted 2009-02-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ended Up with Something Old, Something New, Something Borrowed, and Something Black and Blue
Girl to friend: I scissored at my bachelorette party.
Financial District
San Francisco, California
Categories: Default | Drinking & drunks | Girls | Relationships | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2009-02-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Only Count the Ones Who Give Me Orgasms
Curly-haired brunette: So how many sex partners did you say you'd had?
Straight-haired brunette: I think I said ten.
Curly-haired brunette: That's cool.
Straight-haired brunette: Ten in the past year, I mean. Obviously.
Curly-haired brunette, laughing: Obviously! I've seen you having sex with more people than that.
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Poogs McNasty
While a Choir Sings, My Liquified Remains Will Be Flushed Down a Golden Drain
College freshman: I keep making plans for my funeral, and they keep getting better!
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Anne
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Death & dying | Default | Happiness | San Francisco | Students | Posted 2009-01-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Secret To Salma Hayek's Success
Hipster girl: I don't know, she just smells amazing. Her entire face smells like corn tortilla!
American Apparel
San Francisco, California
Categories: Body parts | Compliments | Default | Food | Girls | Hipsters | San Francisco | Stores | Posted 2009-01-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And a Paper Cup Full Of Tap Water!
Female gallery worker: There is some concern about how much food you've eaten.
Homeless bum: One cupcake!?
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Jon
On Water?
Girl #1: You don't even like Jesus.
Girl #2: I don't like Jesus, but I like the way he walks.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Girls | Jesus | Names | San Francisco | Posted 2009-01-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Takes a Man Years to Forgive Himself for Saying Such Things
Too hip 20-something: But you have to also create an environment where epic things can transpire...
Walzwerk Restaurant
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: glamour-geek
Categories: Compliments | Default | Hipsters | Restaurants | San Francisco | Weirdness | Words | Posted 2009-01-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Know How Iraq Veterans Are Just Happy to Be Home?
Girl: I was having a bad day, so he put me in some predicament bondage to try to cheer me up.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: fetishgirl
Chad and Jeremy Break Up
Gay guy #1, walking down the street: Oh, this place is cute. Your parents should stay here when they visit.
Gay guy #2: That's a funeral home.
Market Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ray
Categories: Compliments | Death & dying | Default | Family ties | Guys | Queers | Relationships | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2009-01-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Because It's Tuesday
Woman in red tutu: I am in pain. And hungover. And starting to drink again. In a red tutu, of course.
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Poogins
Categories: Clothes | Default | Drinking & drunks | Fashion | Feelings | San Francisco | Women | Posted 2008-12-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Still Laugh About It
Guy to friend: So I said to him, "you wanna be a clown and you don't even know who fucking Bozo is?!"
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: phuqmonkey
Categories: Default | Guys | Jobs & Careers | Pop culture | Questions | San Francisco | Wishes | Posted 2008-12-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Only Metaphysically.
Student: Isn't all truth metaphysical by this standard?
Law professor: Are you stoned?
UC Hastings
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Loving this
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Drugs | Philosophy | Questions | San Francisco | Students | Teachers | Posted 2008-12-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Mister Rogers Episode PBS Never Wanted You to See
Neighbor: The first guy that ever fingered me wore Drakkar Noir.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: sassy san franciscan
Categories: Clothes | Default | Foreplay | Girls | Memory lane | San Francisco | Posted 2008-12-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Lot of Those Babies Are Really Wrinkly
Guy: Dude, it's not like you can get Botox while you're breastfeeding.
Girl: Why not?
Zeitgeist Bar
San Francisco, California
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Default | Girls | Guys | Kids | Parenting | Questions | San Francisco | Stupidity | Posted 2008-12-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That, or the Patriot Act
Dirty hobo (screaming): Does anyone have any popcorn on this fucking train? (glares because no one answers) That's what's fucked up with his country, no one will give you any fucking popcorn!
BART Train
San Francisco, California
Categories: Crazies | Default | Food | Hobos | Mental illnesses | Offers and requests | Politics | Questions | San Francisco | Train | Posted 2008-11-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Giuliani As a Kid
Girl: My mom is never going to let me go on a field trip again.
Boy #1: Why?
Girl: I left my jacket at the museum.
Boy #2: Wanna know what I left at the museum? My dignity. My dignity and my pride.
BART
San Francisco, California
Straight Men in San Francisco May Become Spoiled
Guy: Later. (he affectionately shakes girl by shoulders)
Girl: Wait, did you just shake me like a Golden Retriever after we had a nooner?
Guy: Yeah, that was kind of bad. (hugs her)
Financial District
San Francisco, California
The Passengers Could Have Used a Bit More Oxygen
Suit on cell: I just landed in Maine. I mean San Diego. What am I thinking?
Airport
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: weary traveler
Categories: Airports & flights | Default | On the phone | San Francisco | Suits | US Geography | Weirdness | Posted 2008-11-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When "Come Here Often?" Just Isn't Special Enough
Awkward girl: Are you an organ donor?
Uninterested guy: No.
Awkward girl: You should donate your skin. It's nice. Non-cancerous.
Uninterested guy: I'm good.
Awkward girl: Oh. So what's up with guys always having to spread their seed?
BART Train
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Grace
Categories: Advice | Default | Girls | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Questions | San Francisco | Train | Weirdness | Posted 2008-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I've Been Roaming the Earth for Years Waiting for Someone to Give Me That Answer
Man to random cute chick: When's your birthday?
Cute chick: Um, September 27th.
Man: That's Ani DiFranco's birthday!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Categories: About celebrities | California | Default | Girls | Guys | Questions | San Francisco | Posted 2008-09-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Not Even Fake Hipster Poor!
20-something guy: It's a good thing it didn't work out. She was poor.
Rock Climbing Gym
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: tangotravellers
Categories: Default | Guys | Money | Relationships | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2008-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Asian Gangs Confound All Our Expectations
Girl: I hate violinists!
Boy: What?
Girl: Violinists.
Boy: Oh. I thought you said "gang-bangers."
BART Airport Train
San Francisco, California
Categories: Airports & flights | Compare and contrast | Default | Feelings | Girls | Guys | Music | San Francisco | Sexuality | Words | Posted 2008-09-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Same Reason So Many People Apply to Haverford.
Hipster girl #1: I got into Northeastern for grad school. I dunno what to do.
Hipster girl #2: Wow, that's really good! What a great school. Northwestern is like, famous.
Hipster girl #1: No, Northeastern.
Hipster girl #2: Oh. Is that a good school?
Hipster girl #1: Not really. But I figured if I put it small on my resume or say it fast, people will get confused. It clearly works!
30 Bus
San Francisco, California
Categories: Bus | Default | Education | Girls | Hipsters | Memory lane | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2008-08-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now I Have a Little More Captain in Me Than Most People
30-something white lady: I just shove it down my pants. But it's not beer, it's Captain Morgan!
BART Escalator
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Hott Bi Luv
Categories: Clothes | Default | Drinking & drunks | Euphemisms | San Francisco | Train | Whiteys | Women | Posted 2008-08-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Judging from the Testes Hanging Out of It
Hobo to tranny prostitute: You rockin' that dress girl! You the man!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: claire
Categories: Clothes | Compliments | Default | Hobos | San Francisco | Posted 2008-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Eddie Murphy Is a Thrilling Public Speaker
50-something gentleman: Honey, the last time I ran was from a drag queen prostitute, and that was ten years ago. I don't run.
Valencia Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McN
Categories: Default | Memory lane | Old folks | San Francisco | Sexuality | Violence | Posted 2008-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Just Got Tubes Tied"?
Girl, holding up white lacey underwear with text across the ass: "Just married"? Shit, they should make a version that says "just divorced."
Victoria's Secret
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McFreaky
Categories: Default | Girls | Relationships | San Francisco | Stores | Undies | Posted 2008-08-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Likes to Go to Parties and Get Fried
Bus driver: So who else is gonna be there?
Passenger: Chicken boy will be there.
Bus driver: "Chicken boy"?
Passenger: Yeah, you know Dave*. That fool always smells like chicken! I always thought it was just me but at a party last week Elizabeth* and her friends all called him "chicken boy" too!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Dawn
Categories: Bus drivers | Default | Names | Questions | San Francisco | Sensory experiences | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Webcam Viewers Thank You, Too.
(two girls exit bathroom stall together)
Girl #1: It was such a pleasure watching you. It was bliss.
Elbo Room Bar
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: crafty biotech
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Body parts | Default | Feelings | Girls | Happiness | Restroom | San Francisco | Sex | Undies | Posted 2008-07-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Billy Mays Has No Personal Life
Man to woman: When was the last time you waxed your saddle?
Caltrain, San Francisco to Palo Alto
Overheard by: Sarks
Categories: Default | Euphemisms | Guys | Questions | San Francisco | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now I'm Bummed I Didn't Get His Name
Guy #1: Is he good at sex?
Girl: Yeah.
Guy #2: Wow. I'm surprised.
Girl: Honestly, I was too.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Compare and contrast | Compliments | Default | Feelings | Girls | Guys | Questions | San Francisco | Sex | Posted 2008-06-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If I Don't, May God Have Mercy on Your Souls
(the road is closed for Chinese New Year parade)
Bus driver: Folks, we'll be alright. We're going to take a right on Sansome, a left on Broadway, and a left on Stockton. We'll rejoin the original route at Stockton and Sacramento. Don't worry. Everything will be alright. As long as I still get paid, it's okay.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Bus | Default | Feelings | Jobs & Careers | Money | Public Transportation | San Francisco | Threats | Posted 2008-06-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I'm Running Dangerously Low on Reese's Pieces
Seemingly not-crazy lady on elevator: Have you seen any aliens today?
Man: Not yet, but it's still pretty early.
Seemingly not-crazy lady: I hope I don't see any; I don't have any spit.
Fox Plaza
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Uses spit for lube
So If Anyone Requires a Strip-o-Gram...
Law professor: I don't get paid very well at this job. And I need beer money.
SFSU
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: RL
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Default | Drinking & drunks | Gripes | Jobs & Careers | Money | San Francisco | Teachers | Wishes | Posted 2008-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We've Lived a Lifetime in This One Elevator Ride
Professionally dressed Asian girl (in a low voice): I can't believe you showed that girl your pubes, man!
Short, pudgy Asian guy (in a low indignant voice): Well *I* can't believe you showed her your innie nipple!
Elevator, Montgomery Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Categories: Asians | Body parts | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Guys | Nipples | San Francisco | Posted 2008-06-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Jenny Made the Same Observations About Every Church Fundraiser
Respectable-looking chick on cell: Not *nearly* enough trannies.
Vallejo and Powell
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Wild Dog Boy
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Gripes | On the phone | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2008-06-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Maybe Just Take It to a George Clooney Movie
Girl on cell: We're going to vibe her vagina. Well, not vibe it.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: K
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | On the phone | San Francisco | Toys | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In an Abstruse Theological Way That Requires Nothing of Us
Mid-30s casual man to woman: Obama is our modern-day political Jesus Christ. He will save us.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: babybug
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Guys | Jesus | Politics | San Francisco | Weirdness | Posted 2008-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Are Public Rammings Unusual in San Francisco?
Cop on radio: We've gotten a report from race security that there is a large Viking ship being rammed repeatedly into some garbage cans in the park.
Golden Gate Park
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: geek whisperer
She'll Get Forgiveness, but Not Permission
Asian girl #1: They're doing it.
Asian girl #2: They're doing it a lot, it's like twice a week!
Asian girl #1: Man, and she wants it, too!
Asian girl #2: She's Catholic.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Asians | Christianity | Friends | Girls | Relationships | San Francisco | Sex | Posted 2008-06-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Jenna Jameson: "Story of My Life, Honey"
20-something girl: My ass hurts and my throat is sore. I also feel very underwhelmed.
San Francisco, California
Categories: Ass | Default | Feelings | Girls | Gripes | Health & Hygiene | San Francisco | Posted 2008-05-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When I Think about You, I Smell Myself
Dirty hippy skater dude: Oh man! I can smell myself.
Dirty hippy skater girl: I love it when I can smell myself!
Golden Gate Park
San Francisco, California
Categories: Cleanliness | Etiquette | Girls | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Hippies | Pride | San Francisco | Sensory experiences | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Gay Men Can't Drink Coffee? That's Crazy.
Crazy homeless lady to well-dressed businessman: Look at you with the coffee, you faggot, you just love dick in your ass!
Starbucks
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: trying to avoid her wrath
Categories: Ass | Backdoor | Bag ladies | Bars & Clubs | Character | Crazies | Default | Etiquette | Insults | Penis | San Francisco | Posted 2008-04-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As My Plaques and Trophies Will Attest
Dude carrying Subway sandwich: My ass? No, I wouldn't expect a girl to be looking at my ass.
Chick carrying Subway sandwich: Oh yeah. Women will look at your ass. But they can't check out the other thing.
Dude: Well, under certain circumstances . . .
Chick: No, there's nothing equivalent. There's no cleavage shot.
Dude: A girl slapped my ass at the gym the other day.
Chick: Oh yeah. That's right. I have slapped lots of asses.
Howard and New Montgomery
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Cleavage Shots All Around!
Categories: Ass | Bimbettes | Chicks | Default | Euphemisms | Friends | Gender issues | Guys | Penis | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In That She's an American in a Brit's Body
Guy #1, after British tourists leave elevator: Stupid British bitches.
Guy #2: Wow, you hate Brits?
Guy #1: You know it.
Guy #2: But Maggie is British, and you like her.
Guy #1: Yeah, well, that's because Maggie is a tranny.
Hotel Whitcomb
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Adam
And Cute Buttplug!
Woman drying her hands, nonchalantly, to woman ball-gagged and tied to a toilet: "Oh, you changed your hair. It looks pretty."
Women's Bathroom, Bondage-a-GoGo
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Beauty | Compliments | Default | Hair | San Francisco | Women | Posted 2008-04-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Try Not to Taste or Touch Them, Okay?
Automated train station announcement: Castro street station.
Excited little girl: Yay! Castro!
Bystander: The dictator or the district?
Excited little girl thinks for a second: The rainbows!
Castro Street Station
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Dawn
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Kids | Names | Politics | Public Transportation | San Francisco | Weirdness | Words | Posted 2008-04-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And He Was Like, "I Made My Choice"
Midget girl: So, I'm trying to talk to him, but he wouldn't stop checking out my body, and I'm like, 'Hello! My eyes are down here.'
San Francisco State University
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ottsel
Categories: Body parts | California | Chicks | Gossip | San Francisco | Posted 2008-01-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Often His Holiness Feels the Best Response Is Silence
Asian chick: You feel used? I sent him a picture of my boobs and got nothing!
Nordstrom's cafe, Market Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Asians | California | Gripes | Rack | San Francisco | Posted 2008-01-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Tall, Dark, and Bloodshot
Marathon runner #1: Yeah, I really like him, but he's been in rehab since he was fourteen.
Marathon runner #2: All the best ones are.
Nike Women's Marathon
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: shyinvisiblegirl was running with them just to hear this conversation
Categories: California | Chicks | Gripes | San Francisco | Posted 2007-12-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Fine, but Could You Take Your Penis Out of That Bible?
Guy to girlfriend: It doesn't matter what we do! It's pervert weekend!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Categories: California | Guys | Happiness | San Francisco | Posted 2007-12-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When Martha Stewart Has Nightmares
Naked guy with cock ring and whip: So, what are we doing later this evening?
Boyfriend with nipple rings, dog collar, padlock, and leash: We're going to my parents' for dinner, remember?
Naked guy: Oh, right. Your dad asked me to help him with the aquarium.
Boyfriend, looking at huge dildos: And I want to help my mom finish the quilt she's working on. And we should mulch the rose garden while we're there, too.
Folsom Street Fair
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: cultural tourist
Categories: California | Couples | Family ties | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Cell Reception Is Atrocious
Frustrated mom: For the love of God, stop crying! If you don't stop, I'm going to shove you back in my uterus, close my legs, and never let you out!
Crying little boy: No! I don't like it in there!
San Francisco, California
Categories: California | Kids | Moms | San Francisco | Threats | Posted 2007-11-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Can I Be You?
Booth babe: So, you spent your day answering questions about free software, and you're going to spend your night answering questions about -- what -- genital warts?
LinuxWorld Expo
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Just don't confuse the two
Categories: Chicks | Questions | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Although I Do Like the Nightlife
Queer, when Bible-thumping lady splashes him with holy water: I'm a faggot, not a vampire. There's a difference.
San Luis Obispo Gay Pride Festival
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Rish
Categories: California | Gossip | Queers | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Could You Be More Specific?
Girl: Is there anything on my ass? You're a girl. You look and see and tell me. Oh my god, is there anything on my ass?!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Ass | Chicks | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Difference between Men and Women
Hippie chick on cell: ... So then I realized that's just how she is and I need to honor that.
Guy passerby: Just get it over with and call her a bitch already!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Categories: Advice | Hippies | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Unfriendly Bug Spirits Are the Worst
Tween boy: Can you imagine what it would be like to spend the night here? All the unfriendly spirits...
Teen girl, horrified: And, bugs!
Alcatraz Island
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Casper the Friendly Roach
Categories: Insects | San Francisco | Teens | Posted 2007-11-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now, Sweetie, You Know I'm Against Condiment-Distribution to Children
Mom with sunscreen in hand: Give me your arm so I can put this on you.
Little boy: Ewww! What is that?
Mom: Sunscreen. What did you think it was?
Little boy: Mayonnaise!
Giants Game, AT&T Park
San Francisco, California
Categories: Food | Kids | Moms | San Francisco | Posted 2007-11-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Since She's Only Eleven
Old grump #1: Well, you know how women boast.
Old grump #2: I know that. But I still cannot take her word for it that she is the best lay in the city.
Bloomingdale's
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: the real deal
Categories: Gossip | Old folks | San Francisco | Posted 2007-10-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Did Start Bathing with the Entire Football Team
Teen girl to friend: Did you really think it was a coincidence that the week after you started bathing regularly you lost your virginity?
The Urban School
San Francisco, California
Categories: Bathing | Questions | San Francisco | Teens | Posted 2007-10-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Frosted Tips Are Just Wrong
Bar patron: I might talk about it if I had a few drinks in me... But I'd never let someone do it!
Hawaii Bar
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: McNasty
Categories: Customers | Gossip | San Francisco | Posted 2007-10-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We'll Get Ours When We Turn on Bill O'Reilly
Father to squirmy two-year-old looking out bus window: No, honey, that's a church. We can't go there -- they'll give you a lobotomy.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Rebekah
Categories: Dads | Lies | San Francisco | Posted 2007-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Man, What Isn't?
Drunk hobo: Got any spare change so I can buy me some pussy? [Sees man holding sign, "Jesus loves you."] ... It's in the Bible!
Powell and Market Streets
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Peggy
Categories: Hobos | Panhandling | San Francisco | Posted 2007-09-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
There's a San Francisco Men's Room without Lotion?
Suit #1: The ladies here really have it better than the guys.
Suit #2: Like how?
Suit #1: Like the women's restroom -- they've got nice stuff in there. They've got flowers and hand lotion and, like, free tampons! Why don't the guys get that?!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Gender issues | San Francisco | Suits | Posted 2007-09-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Not Politics?
Student: I decided to be a speech communication major because I like to talk a lot, and I wanted to find a way where I could get a job that makes me a lot of money for using my mouth.
San Francisco State University
California
Categories: Jobs & Careers | San Francisco | Students | Posted 2007-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or at Least on the Photos We'll Be Passing Out
Hot chick to another: You look so good! Guys will be jerking off on you tonight!
Vallejo Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Compliments | Friends | San Francisco | Posted 2007-08-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
His Screenname Is BiggStudd4U
Late-20s blonde yuppie: I love him, and I think he loves me.
Late-20s brunette yuppie: That's cool.
Late-20s blonde yuppie: Yeah, I think his name's Paul or John or something.
North Beach
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: i love love
Categories: Gossip | Names | San Francisco | Yuppies | Posted 2007-08-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Remember Our Talk about Leda and the Swan?
Mother, reading newspaper: Dear God, another rapist is loose...
Six-year-old daughter: Mom, what's rape?
Mother, uncomfortably: Um, that's when a man forces a woman to have sex with him.
Six-year-old daughter: What's sex?
Mother: Look! A bird!
Market Street
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Queen Of Spades
Categories: Kids | Moms | Questions | San Francisco | Posted 2007-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You're Not Still Pregnant?
Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you must be having a boy!
Very preggers: Uh, no... It's actually a girl.
Enthusiastic lady: Really? Because your face has changed!
Very preggers: What do you mean?
Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you know, it just looks bad. I was ugly, too, when I was pregnant with my son.
Clinic waiting room
San Francisco, California
Categories: Insults | Preggers | San Francisco | Strangers | Posted 2007-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Yeah, I've Had to Tell Tommy Hilfiger's People No
Hobo #1, holding gallon of water: I've been trying to drink a lot of water. You need to clear that toxic shit out. You collect lots of, uh, what they called? Endorsements. Your body just builds up these endorsements, and they poison you! I think that's what they're called... You know what I mean?
Hobo #2: [Nods knowingly.]
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Rich
Categories: Advice | Hobos | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2007-07-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Impossible Not To
Princess at front of bus: ... And I went through seven laptops in high school.
Passenger: Oh, yeah? I went through ten laptops in high school!
Princess, offended: It's rude to eavesdrop, you know!
5 bus
San Francisco, California
Categories: Gossip | San Francisco | Strangers | Posted 2007-06-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Take That Back or I'll Give You an Atomic Wedgie Right Here
Late 20s drone in front of train operator's door: Excuse me, can you move forward? The operator said I'm blocking the window.
Late 40s suit: No, you move forward. This is my spot.
Late 20s drone: We're both blocking the window, and I can't move unless you do.
Late 40s suit: I'm not moving.
Late 20s drone, groaning: You're an ass.
Late 40s suit: No, you're an ass.
Late 20s drone, pushing past: Oh, fuck you.
Late 40s suit, mocking: Oh, fuck you.
Late 20s drone: Good luck in third grade.
BART train, Bay Point - Daly City line
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: baby boomers must die
Categories: Insults | Jerks | San Francisco | Strangers | Train | Posted 2007-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And If That Means We Can't Be Married within Our Faith, So Be It
Chick: No, you will not show my grandma your penis! I don't want my grandma telling me that you're too small or too big for her granddaughter!
Puerto Allegra restaurant
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Amber
Categories: Chicks | Penis | San Francisco | Posted 2007-05-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Slick Salty Shame
Dude: So, you know what makes a great lube? Tears.
Chick: Yeah, they do. Especially in the shower.
864 Club
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Cdogg Davis
Categories: Friends | Gossip | San Francisco | Posted 2007-05-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Guess She Was Kind of Model-Ugly
20-ish girl: I mean, I thought he was rich, but his sister's kind of ugly, so I dunno...
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Idle
Categories: Beauty | Chicks | Money | San Francisco | Posted 2007-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Also, Same Question for "Penis"
Skater punk: Wait -- uterus like the planet, or in your body?
San Francisco, California
Categories: Punks | San Francisco | Stupidity | Words | Posted 2007-05-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Her Gentle Way of Saying, "You Give Shitty Head"
Large man: You need a back rub?
Girl rubbing shoulder in pain: I'm fine, thanks.
Large man: I give great massages. My mama says it's better than a orgasm.
MUNI bus
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: melissa
Categories: Creepsters | Family ties | Gossip | San Francisco | Posted 2007-04-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Mission: Impossible III Is Quite a Disappointment
Man: That was the most secure Mexican bathroom I've ever seen.
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: didn't bother to find out
Categories: Cleanliness | Guys | San Francisco | Posted 2007-04-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Father! How Nice to See You Again
Guy on phone at leather bar: Yeah, I'm at a church social... doing the Lord's work. I'll be on my knees later.
San Francisco, California
Shout-out: overheardinsanfrancisco.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Kiko
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Liars | Lies | On the phone | Overheard in San Francisco | San Francisco | Posted 2007-03-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
