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I'd Suggest a Rollerblades Tour
Fat American female tourist to new best friend: If ya didn't like the Vatican, you're gonna hate the Louvre!
6th Floor, Hilton Arc de Triumph
Paris
France
Overheard by: Pope Andrew I
If He Inquires, Just Say "It's Because You're So Big"
American backpacker girl, about her new hostel boyfriend: So, as of this afternoon, he's one step closer to not being a virgin.
Dutch girl, shocked: What about your period?!
American friend, walking up: Don't worry. Just do it. He won't even know what's going on anyways.
Loki Hostel
La Paz
Bolivia
Categories: Default | Foreigners | Friends | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Sexuality | South America | Tourists | Virginity | Posted 2008-06-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But, More Importantly, Why Is Your Subway Outside?
Guy with luggage: What's the temperature tonight?
Guy without luggage: Two.
Guy with luggage: Two? Two! Why the fuck do people live here!?
Brown Line
Chicago, Illinois
Then Why Are My Hands Silver After Touching It?
Tourist: Is it solid silver?
Salesman: Let me show you. First, do you know how to tell the difference between solid silver and silver plate?
Tourist: No.
Salesman: This is solid silver.
Dodgy Souvenir Shop
Egypt
Categories: Africa | Compare and contrast | Customers | Default | Guys | Offers and requests | Questions | Shopping | Stores | Tourists | Posted 2008-05-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But We Call Them "American Voters"
American chick #1: Ohmigod! Look at those white cows! I've never seen cows like that before!
American chick #2: Maybe they're albino... Or it could be a special British type of cow.
Guy sitting behind them: ... Those are sheep.
Bus, Southern England
Overheard by: pretends to be Canadian
And This Money Isn't Even Green!
Middle-aged American tourist woman: The rooms here have strange plugs, I simply cannot use my curling iron! This is outrageous... I want to see the manager immediately!
Hotel Restaurant
Munich
Germany
Overheard by: Dru
Categories: Clients | Compare and contrast | Germany | Gripes | Idiots | Restaurants | Technology | Tourists | Wishes | Women | Posted 2008-04-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just When Race Relations Were Improving in Boston
White tourist: I'm really sorry -- I don't have any change. If I did, I'd give you some, but I don't, so... sorry. Good luck with everything...
Black dude: Cracka, I'm ain't homeless!
Hynes Convention Center subway stop
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Black people | Comebacks | Default | Feelings | Massachusetts | Public transportation | Tourists | Whiteys | Posted 2008-03-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But No One Who Speaks German Could Be a Mean Guy!
American guy: Could you stamp my passport, please? It's a hobby of mine.
Passport checker to coworker, in German: These damn Americans always want something. Look, they've all got booze and bags and t-shirts. Now they want stamps.
American girl: Sir, I'd like mine stamped, too.
Passport checker, in German: I bet that girl was here to fuck guys. American girls become sluts in Europe.
American girl: Sir, that's not very nice!
Passport checker, still in German: I hate it when they know German. Then we can't talk about them!
Airport
Cologne
Germany
Categories: Assholes | Germany | Insults | Language barrier | Tourists | Posted 2008-02-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Won't Dignify That with a Witty Retort
Lost woman: Excuse me, can you tell me what state I'm in?
Mall of America
Bloomington, Minnesota
Overheard by: ugh...tourists
Where the Delinquent Moose Live?
Tourist to waitress: How do we get to the bad part of town?
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: kyle
Categories: Overheard in Vancouver | Questions | Tourists | Posted 2007-12-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Either That or They Swallowed Some
Dutch tourist as four very fat tourists waddle by: I bet they're American.
Hong Kong, China
Overheard by: i was thinking the same thing
Ever Feel Like We Deserve the Rest of the World's Contempt?
American tourist #1, approaching Piazza de Michelangelo: Oooh, is that the David? Like, the real David?
American tourist #2: No, that's not the real one. The real one doesn't have arms.
Florence
Italy
Overheard by: Lex
But We Have Legal Marijuana
Canadian tourist #1: Guys, you know what the States have that most of Canada doesn't?
Three others: What?
Canadian tourist #1: Black people...
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: Bored At Work
Not All of Them Involve Blood When Lost, Though
Tourist #1: No, there is more than one kind of virginity.
Tourist #2: What?
Tourist #1: You know, like anal-ginity, Argentina-ginity, Ameri-ginity. All kinds of '-ginities.'
Tourist #2: Wow, that's sick, man.
Buenos Aires
Argentina
Ever Wondered How It's Possible to Have Fun in Tennessee?
Midwestern tourist: Excuse me, are there any malls around here?
Local teen, in exaggerated accent: We don't have malls in these here parts. Malls tempt the young ones to siiin. [Tourist leaves, scared. Teen then grumbles without accent] Fucking tourist.
Broadway and 4th Avenue
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: pedestrian
Like That Time You Dragged Me to Popeye's
Tourist at Folklife Festival: You're just looking for an excuse to take a picture of a black person.
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Categories: Eavesdrop DC | Race | Tourists | Posted 2007-08-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And That's How I Got AIDS
American tourist: It all started when I said, 'Hey, Dave, are you up for a sword fight?'
Temple Bar
Dublin
Ireland
The Man Hopes; the Woman Knows
Old man: Are you going somewhere exciting?
Girl with suitcase: Not really. But when I get there, I'm getting laid.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: aaron
Categories: Gossip | Old folks | Overheard in PDX | Tourists | Posted 2007-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Maybe You Should Think about Having That Removed
Passenger to Muslim agent lady: People must get freaked out when they see you.
Ticket counter, Newark airport
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: OOC
Categories: New Jersey | Race | Tourists | Posted 2007-06-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Look, There's Seven of Them, Alright?
Tourist: What's a gable?
Tour guide: A peak in a roof.
Tourist: So, a gable is a roof?
Tour guide: Uh... Yes.
House of Seven Gables
Salem, Massachusetts
Categories: Massachusetts | Stupidity | Tourists | Posted 2007-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Now I Found a White House with a Really Big Lawn
Tourist girl on cell: I found the house I want to live in when I move to DC, but then I found out it was the Smithsonian...
Washington, DC
Categories: Gossip | Stupidity | Tourists | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-05-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
