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Confirming Everything I Know About Male Swimmers
Teenage boy to his mother: There's a lot of crazy stuff going on in the team area. It got all over my face, but none of it got in my mouth.
Summer League Swim Meet
Ashburn, Virginia
Categories: Body parts | Sexuality | Teens | Virginia | Weirdness | Posted 2011-08-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Which Is Weird, Because I Keep Fucking Complete Douches.
Teen girl #1: Tell him it's a date. I need to get laid.
Teen girl #2: Oh my goodness.
Teen girl #1: My vagina has cobwebs!
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Carly
Tonight's Movie: The Object Of My Infection
Teen girl on phone: The chlamydia is inclusive.
Nashville, Tennessee
Categories: Health & Hygiene | STDs | Teens | Tennessee | Weirdness | Posted 2011-07-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's So 1995.
Teen girl: Dad, stop talking about Hugh Grant's penis!
Concord, Massachusetts
Categories: About celebrities | Family ties | Massachusetts | Penis | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2011-06-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What? I'm an Adult in the Eyes Of the Church!
Newly confirmed 15-year-old: Man, hangovers suck.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Ian
Categories: Drinking & drunks | Feelings | Overheard in Minneapolis | Philosophy | Teens | Posted 2011-06-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You're No Pussy, Dad
Teenage girl to father: I didn't come out of her vagina, okay? I don't have to respect her.
Father: Well, I guess you don't respect me either, cause you didn't come out of my vagina!
Chesapeake, Virginia
Overheard by: made my day
It's a Small Mind After All
Teenage girl to mother in annoyed tone: Everything in here is too Asian.
Japan Pavilion Shop
Epcot, Walt Disney World
Florida
Overheard by: I'm living in a world I do not understand
Puberty Is Fun!
12-year-old boy, enthusiastically: I like my genitalia!
Portland, Oregon
That's What You Keep Saying About Your Pregnancies!
Teenager #1: Why does the train keep stopping?
Teenager #2: Because it has to stop at train stations.
Teenager #1: Ohmigod, train stations are so random!
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Angela
Categories: Australia | Public Transportation | Questions | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2011-03-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They'll Tell Us What to Do
Teen, hearing that IBM computer "Watson" is winning at Jeopardy: That makes me so happy! We have robot overlords!
Ithaca, New York
Categories: Feelings | New York | Technology | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2011-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I'm Allergic to Flannel.
Anime-loving teenager on cell: So it's like I'm a lesbian in a man's body. Except I like boys.
CTrain
Calgary
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Gender issues | On the phone | Sexuality | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2011-02-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kathy Griffin Loves Disneyland
Teen to another: I got so excited, I have wet butt syndrome!
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: Kristen
Categories: Ass | California | Maladies | Sensory experiences | Teens | Posted 2011-02-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Feminator Was a Surprisingly Popular Superhero
14-year-old boy, running down the hall after another: You're feminating me.
Newfoundland
Canadia
Jared Took Silver at the TMI Olympics
Boy, returning from the washroom: I had the mini-barfs!
Sam Woo Restaurant
Mississauga
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Food | Health & Hygiene | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2011-01-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
One Has to Love One's Own Nipples First, I Suppose
Young boy: I just wish this bus would come so I can stop thinking about my nipples.
Bus Stop
England
How Come My School's "Culture Day" Is Never That Exciting?
Teen #1: So he's running around with his dick like slapping his abs and he goes "what time you wanna come over?"
Teen #2: His Puerto Rican dick?
Teen #1: Yeah!
Teen #2, sighing dreamily: Oh yeahhhhh.
Flinder's Street Station
Melbourne
Australia
Who You Callin' Unoriginal?!
Emo #1, trying on black eyeshadow: Does it look alright?
Emo #2: Yeah, it looks great!
Emo #1: Should I buy it?
Emo #2: Yes! Oh my god, there's some on your face!
Emo #1: Where?
Emo #2: There, on your cheek!
(emo #1 starts wiping it off)
Emo #2: Hey, you look like an aboriginal.
Cosmetics Shop
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Somni
Categories: Beauty | New York | Sensory experiences | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2010-12-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When You Built Me That Bird-Feeder from Scratch
Sixteen-year-old blonde goth: I think I want to be a lesbian.
Teenage friend: I thought you were one.
Salem, Oregon
Overheard by: Geneva
Categories: Bringing it back to you | Gender issues | Goths | Oregon | Sexuality | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-12-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Really Big Girls, Though
Ditzy blond: How many girls have you seen down there!
Ditzy guy with ditzy blond: Tons! Like, so many! (pause) Oh, okay! Fine! Six.
Great American Ball Park
Cincinnati, Ohio
16 and NOT Pregnant Is Rather a Snoozefest
High school girl: I've gone to second base with a guy, but have done pretty much everything with a girl. Because penises are scary.
Forest of Fear
Tuxedo, New York
Overheard by: Kaitlen
What If It's All True, Though?
Teenage girl: But you don't actually believe god made the world in seven days.
Teenage boy: No.
Teenage girl: And you believe in evolution and the dinosaurs?
Teenage boy: Yes.
Teenage girl: How come?
Teenage boy: Because a world that never had dinosaurs is a world I want no part of.
Adelaide
Australia
It's the Code Of the West
Teen girl to teen friends in checkout line bumping into each other: Stop it, you guys, this isn't the Dollar Store, we're in Wal-Mart, you gotta act classy!
Wal-Mart
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: Shawna
Isn't That The L Word's Go-To Plot?
High school girl on phone: Wait... How do I rape you?
Denver, Colorado
Guys See Life Itself As a Huge Taco Party
Guy: What are you all doing?
Teen girl #1, waving taco: We're having a taco party.
Teen girl #2: Taco party!
Guy: Awesome! Keep on keeping on!
Dallas, Texas
Overheard by: I want a Taco Party
"Tulsa" Spelled Backwards Is "a Slut"-- Coincidence?
Teen girl to friend: I'm too sexy for my vulva.
Tulsa, Oklahoma
And I'm Washing It Down with Laxatives!
Model scout, handing out card to hot tall teen: I know you're probably modeling already, but take my card anyway.
Shorter teen girl to friend, after scout has left: Fuck you. The only reason he gave you his card instead of me was because I'm eating a cookie. But it's the only thing I've had to eat today!
Starbucks
Studio City, California
Overheard by: Urz
Categories: Bars & Clubs | California | Employees | Food | Friends | Insults | Jobs & Careers | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2010-09-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Do You Date Much?
Mother: Why are you so exhausted?
Chubby teen, out of breath: There... Was... Dog!
Mom: You ran from a dog?
Chubby teen: I ran... From Cerberus, watchdog of Hades.
Pulaski, Virginia
Good to See Kids Become Self-Mocking
Teen girl, holding candy bar: Why does it have to be so big? I can't take all this. (pause) That's what I said!
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania
Kim Jong-il: "Wait, What?"
16-year-old male in office waiting room, to friend: You can't just solve all your problems by causing a nuclear holocaust, man!
Whatcom Community College
Bellingham, Washington
Overheard by: littlegirlmonkey
Categories: Advice | Colleges & Universities | Friends | Teens | Violence | Washington | Posted 2010-09-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Explain, Here's Elmo With the Aphabet Song
Teen girl to another, while browsing CDs: Like, alphabetical order is so confusing.
Music Store
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: Justin
The BP Oil Spill? Really?
Teen girl: But let's face it: if you walk in to a porn shop handcuffed, people are going to assume that you had something to do with it.
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: nyssa
Georgia Lesbians Do Not Play
Teen girl in dept. store: I need to buy her a present, but it can't be jewelry. She doesn't like jewelry. She likes weapons.
Gainesville, Georgia
Or Whatever This Is in My Eye
16-year-old: Mom, if you don't have herpes, why'd I find Valtrex in your purse?
Mother, seriously: I got Valtrex from the eye doctor for my yeast infection, Kim*.
Illinois
Categories: Body parts | Health & Hygiene | Illinois | Moms | Parenting | STDs | Teens | Posted 2010-09-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And They Know
Teen girl, incredulously: But you don't call a fattie "fat"!
Teen guy: I know!
Australia
Overheard by: PCGoneWrong
Categories: Australia | Diet & weight | Names | Teens | Posted 2010-09-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Aww, That's Cold.
Obese teenager to mom: I wish I had an ice cream maker built into my steering wheel.
Mother: Stop.
Mobile, Alabama
Categories: Alabama | Diet & weight | Fat people | Food | Moms | Parenting | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Take That IPad!
Teen girl #1, looking at bookmarks: Oh--I would totally read if I had a cool bookmark!
Teen girl #2: Oh, me too, for sure!
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Best. Birthday Party. Ever.
Teen boy to girl: No! It was an Indian! And it was not vagina soup!
Danby, New York
Stay Away from Drugs, Kids!
Teen ordering at Subway: Yeah, I want mustard.
Teen friend: No way. Mustard?
Teen ordering: I like mustard.
Teen friend: Omigod, I'm telling Paul* and he's never gonna talk to you again.
Teen ordering: What? Omigod! No, don't!
Teen friend, pulling out phone and dialing: Too late.
Teen ordering, almost crying: I like Paul*!
Teen friend, answering phone: Hello? Paulie! Natasha* loves mustard. (pause) Oh. Never mind, Paul* likes mustard.
Cashier: Um, are you two drunk?
Teen ordering, wide-eyed: Do you like mustard?
Subway
Alabama
Overheard by: they were drunk.
None Of Them Are Filtered
Teen gangsta wannabe yelling to small boy on playground: No, I wasn't, I don't smoke! He was just transferring the smoke to my mouth! (pause) Never mind! I'm not gay!
Park
Cincinnati, Ohio
It Enchants All the Men Who See It
Teenage boy: I'm so ripped my back has a six pack! Six-pack back!
Portland, Oregon
Categories: Body parts | Oregon | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2010-08-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Beware Of Canadian Estheticians, Dear Reader
Teenage girl to friend, giggling: So then she said she was going to put diarrhea on my face!
Toronto
Canadia
Also Why Children Love the Berenstein Bears
Teen girl to teen friends: I wish I was mixed race--not really black. I mean, you're brown all year round.
Nottingham
England
Overheard by: Johnny
If Grad School Has Taught Me Anything, It's That You Can.
Teen girl to teen boy: But you can't play spin the bottle with a box of wine!
Giant Eagle
Parma, Ohio
Overheard by: Tmoore
Categories: Drinking & drunks | Ohio | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2010-07-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sesame Street Has, Like, Totally Opened My Eyes!
Clueless teen girl: I didn't know that New Mexico was a state, I thought it was a country!
Ditzy blonde: Ohmygod! No way!
Clueless teen girl: Yeah, I know! And did you know that "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and "The Alphabet Song" are the same?!
Ditzy blonde: No fucking way!
High School
Wisconsin
Overheard by: Genius
How the Economy Works: Explained
Teen girl #1: Omigawd, I just realized. If we borrowed five dollars from like twenty people, we'd have eighty dollars!
Teen girl #2: Haha, yeah! Wait. (long pause) Yeah, like eighty dollars!
St Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: Had hope for a second, there
Being a Termite Must Suck
Grungy teenager to group of grungy friends: And then I ate half of a cardboard box!
Olympia, Washington
Overheard by: Claire
Categories: Diet & weight | Food | Friends | Teens | Washington | Weirdness | Posted 2010-07-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Are Balls.
13-year-old boy in black "Rock On" shirt: I want a pink ball. Pink is manly.
Stephens City, Virginia
Overheard by: Tybois
Categories: Fashion | Gender issues | Teens | Virginia | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Now That We've Invented These Little Wagons for Them.
Older teenager: Go get me my Clif Bar!
Little girl, eating ice cream sandwich: I will, but I don't want my ice cream to melt.
Older teenager, very annoyed: Bring it with you. You know an ice cream sandwich is portable!
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Food | Girls | New York | Offers and requests | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Granted, We Learned About the Teacher's Sex Life...
Teen girl #1: How was econ today?
Teen girl #2, indignantly: We actually learned something, I was so bummed...
Beverly Hills High School
Beverly Hills, California
Overheard by: zen
Categories: California | Education | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2010-06-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks So Much, You Obese Cocksucker! Love Ya!
Teenage girl to friend: You're pretty fucked up too. (pause) No, I mean in a positive way!
Melbourne
Australia
...Mine Just Tells Me to Burn Things.
Mother to teenage daughter: Are you sure you don't want anything?
Skinny teenage daughter: Nah. (shrugs) My uterus isn't happy.
(mother raises a quizzical eyebrow)
Skinny teenage daughter: It's all like: "hello, I'm a uterus, and I'm going to bloat my way through for awhile, and push Ms Stomach organ out through Ms Bellybutton."
Mother: Oh.
Burger King
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: i just work here...
Categories: Body parts | Happiness | Moms | New York | Restaurants | Skinny people | Teens | Uterus | Wishes | Posted 2010-06-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Think Of It Like That Marijuana You Have in Your Desk
Teenage girl in the middle of high school hallway: Hold on to your virginity, Kaylee! Hold on to it, and never let it go!
Edmonton
Canadia
Categories: Advice | Canadia | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teens | Virginity | Posted 2010-06-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And I'm a B-Cup, Easy
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I have a bigger penis than you.
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Penis | Teens | Washington | Posted 2010-06-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Always Give Your Pets Such Unique Names!
Teen girl on cell: Yes, well, there's excitement, plateau, orgasm... and I forget the last one.
99 Bus
Vancouver
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | On the phone | Orgasm | Sensory experiences | Sex | Teens | Posted 2010-05-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's the First Thing I Can Remember
Young teen girl: So he fucked both your mums, and that's how you two are related?
Boy #1: Yeah.
Boy #2: But he didn't start fucking my mum till after she had me.
Bus
Wollongong
Australia
Overheard by: definately not related
Categories: Australia | Bus | Family ties | Questions | Sex | Teens | Time Management | Posted 2010-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Worst. Feel-Good Movie. Ever.
Teenage girl on cell, with happy look on face: And I kept at it until it was the artichoke it was always meant to be!
Del Mar Fairgrounds
San Diego County, California
Categories: California | Food | On the phone | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2010-05-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Keeps Muttering About My Becoming Self-Supporting
Teen girl: My dad bought me an iPhone but he took it away when he found my pot. I'm so pissed.
Emo teen: You live in Portland. Either you're gay, you enjoy molesting children, or you do every drug available for free. Or all of the above. What the hell does he expect of you?
Portland, Oregon
Categories: Cell phones | Drugs | Family ties | Kids | Oregon | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2010-05-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's a Tale As Old As Time...
Father to teen daughter: We've got the rubber suits, but we're out of talcum powder!
Concord, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Emma W.
Categories: Cleanliness | Clothes | Dads | Massachusetts | Teens | Posted 2010-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Make-a-Wish Foundation Failed to Return Her Calls
Teenage girl: You know what I wish I had?
Teenage boy, not paying attention: Uh-huh.
Teenage girl: A penis... I'd just go shoving it into people's butts.
Teenage boy: Wait... What?
Teenage girl, whispering to herself: I wish I had a penis.
Bus
Ottawa
Canadia
Now Let's Go Look at It in One Of Those Funhouse Mirrors, Okay?
30-something lady to teen boy: It's so... small!
Teen boy: No one asked you to measure it.
Carson City, Nevada
Overheard by: Bailey W.
Categories: Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Nevada | Teens | Women | Posted 2010-04-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Zac Efron Movie That Should Be Made
Teenage boy, shrieking: He touched my penis! He touched my penis! And I'm gay! I'm gay!
Charleston, South Carolina
Categories: Penis | Queers | Sexuality | South Carolina | Teens | Posted 2010-04-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now No One Can See My Tears
Emo teen boy #1 on whitewater raft ride: This ride is fucking shit! My shoes are like totally getting soaked.
Emo teen boy #2: It's getting in your hair.
(emo teen boy #1 pulls singlet over hair to protect it from the water)
Emo teen boy #3: Yeah, it's going all fucked.
Emo teen boy #1: No fucking way, it took us so long to straighten our hair this morning! This ride is fucking shit! Why is there so much water?!
Queensland
Australia
Overheard by: Dylan
Hey, You Can Take the California Driver's Test in Vagina
Preppy blonde teen: So I told him I really had to go, and he said my pussy was telling him it wanted to stay.
Brunette friend: What the fuck, I never knew he spoke vagina!
Beverly Hills, California
Categories: California | Sex | Teens | Vagina | Posted 2010-03-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How Come You Never Let Me Use That Excuse?
Teenage kid: Awww! Mum, not those, why did you have to throw them out?
Mother: I don't know. Sometimes my hands just do things...
Sydney
Australia
Have You Learned So Little from The Sweetest Thing?
Teen girl in bathroom #1: I'd hate to be a guy and have to use a urinal.
Teen girl in bathroom #2: Oh yeah, that thing looks unsanitary.
Teen girl in bathroom #1: Not even that, but like if you had to go poop then everyone would know it.
Teen girl in bathroom #3: You can't poop in a urinal?
High School
Coral Springs, Florida
Categories: Compare and contrast | Florida | Gender issues | Pee | Poop | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2010-03-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What? You've Never Heard Of Rounding?
Young teenage girl to friend: $3.25 for a Rockstar? That's like, wait... (pauses for a few seconds) That's like five dollars.
Tacoma Mall
Washington
Overheard by: Not impressed by the math skills of today's youth.
Categories: Money | Shopping | Stupidity | Teens | Washington | Posted 2010-03-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Also Would Have Accepted "Cuban"
Teen girl: What that thing that Frank Sinatra was? It starts with a "k"?
Teen friend: A "crooner"?
Girl: Yeah, that's it. A crooner.
Starbucks
Ontario
Canadia
Categories: About celebrities | Canadia | Restaurants | Stupidity | Teens | Words | Posted 2010-03-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wouldn't That Make Her Into a Lesbian?
Teenage girl to friend: I want a boy. If I get a girl I'm going to shove her back in.
New Jersey
Categories: Birthing | Gender issues | New Jersey | Teens | Violence | Posted 2010-02-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...With the Red Carpet
Teenage girl on cell: I'm not saying that I want to be famous, I know not everyone can be famous, I'm just saying that's the one thing I've always, like, aspired to, just a beautiful connection.
Huddersfield
England
Categories: England | On the phone | Stupidity | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-02-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Who Also Happens to Be My Husband.
Teen mum #1 with baby in pushchair: Ah! Lovely baby boy! Who's the father?
Teen mum #2 with baby in pushchair: That scumbag from the pub a few months back.
Clothes Store
Dartford
England
Right in the Seabiscuit
15-year-old girl to friend: And then she tells me, like three weeks later: "You know how I was angry at you? Well, I punched your horse."
School Cafeteria
New Zealand
Categories: Animals | Feelings | New Zealand | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teens | Violence | Posted 2010-02-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What All Guys Hope and All Girls Fear
Teen to friend: My pants are tight in the crotch, I think I am getting bigger in that region.
Buffalo, New York
Overheard by: el.
...But Before I Start to Spoil
16-year-old girl #1: I wanna wait to have kids, you know? But I don't wanna be old or anything. I think like 19 or somethin.
16-year-old girl #2: Yeah. Oscar wants to knock me up and I'm like "no bitch, I don't even have a license yet." We're thinking after I turn 18.
Los Angeles, California
Categories: Age and ageing | California | Insults | Kids | Pregnancy | Relationships | Sex | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2010-01-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Think I Don't Dream About Them at Night?
Teen girl #1: I have pomegranate green tea at home.
Teen girl #2: Oh my god! Just think of the antioxidants!
Charlottesville, Virginia
Overheard by: local woman
Categories: Food | Health & Hygiene | Teens | Virginia | Posted 2010-01-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Kept Up-to-Date on My Facebook Status, You'd Know
Teenage girl #1 to others in feminine products aisle: When do you douche?
Teenage girl #2: I don't know, when do you douche?
(group of teenage girls giggle hysterically)
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: personally, I prefer Thursdays
Then He Was Like, "This Is a Job Interview, Tanya."
Black teen girl to friend: He was like "you're so high you don't even know what to do!" and I was like "nigga, this ain't the first time I smoked!"
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: Hancock
Ooo, Now Tell Me the Plot Of Unbreakable!
Teenager #1: Wanna rent Untraceable?
Teenager #2: Oh, that's like that movie where they can't trace him.
Vestavia Hills, Alabama
Overheard by: Keith
Let Your Mother, God Bless Her, Wear the Army Boots
Teen girl holding shoe: Can I get this in a...
Ghetto shoe salesman: Dayummm girl, that's an ugly shoe!
Teen girl: Em... Aren't you supposed to be selling this to me?
Ghetto shoe salesman: Yeah, but see, y'alls not a ugly person, I can't let y'all buy an ugly shoe.
Teen girl: Thank you?
Los Angeles, California
And You Thought SpongeBob Was Gay
Teenage girl to friend: Anyway, I think he likes me... He gave me a sponge bath last night.
Victoria
Australia
Overheard by: Ineke
And by "Celebrating Mass" I Mean Exactly What You Think I Mean
18-year-old guy to friend: If I liked kids, I would be celebrating mass at a Catholic church.
Mexico City
Mexico
Overheard by: Kafnut
Categories: Central America | Christianity | Friends | Kids | Teens | Posted 2009-12-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Would've Assumed You Could Read
Train conductor, to teenage girl with feet on chair: Can you read? (points to sign)
Teenage girl: What...? Oh, sorry. (takes her feet down, conductor walks away)
Suit: He would have never done that if you were a guy.
New Jersey Transit
Categories: Conductors | New Jersey | Public Transportation | Questions | Sexuality | Suits | Teens | Posted 2009-12-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which Has a Built-In Polygraph
Teen, trying to convince friends: He wasn't lying! It was on Facebook!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: the usher
Categories: Friends | Internet | Lies | Overheard in Minneapolis | Teens | Posted 2009-12-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Are You Even Here, Mary Anne?
Teen to friend at urinal: How many people do you think have whacked off into this urinal?
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: seriously?
Categories: Friends | Masturbation | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Restroom | Teens | Posted 2009-12-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Spoken Like Someone Who's Never Seen Mr. Wrong
Teen girl on cell: Cuz you're not a lesbian fan, and I like lesbians. They're funny.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: um...
Categories: Compare and contrast | On the phone | Overheard in Minneapolis | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-12-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I Can Always Use an Extra Set Of Eyes
Teen girl #1, drawing faces on napkins with sharpies: Look! I named this one Mr Toastpuff!
Teen girl #2: Wonderful.
Teen girl #1: He's my best friend!
Teen girl #2: You replaced me with a napkin?
Teen girl #1: Well, you replaced me with a potato!
Teen girl #2: True...
Birmingham, Alabama
...That's an Erection, Joey.
Teenage boy to friend: Oh, damn, my skin's turning purple again!
Friend: Your skin's turning purple again?
Teenage boy: Yeah!
Friend: Oh, damn!
Charleston, South Carolina
Categories: Body parts | Friends | Sensory experiences | South Carolina | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-12-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...From the Sketchy Dude Gyrating Next to Me.
Teen princess to another, in changing room: Oh my god, she's so trashy. Who would ask their friends to a a pole-dancing class there? The pole dancing studios I go to in the city are like sexy and hot. But at that one, I got carpet burn.
Changing Rooms
Sydney
Australia
Categories: Australia | Compare and contrast | Dancing | Education | Questions | Sensory experiences | Sex | Teens | Posted 2009-12-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Think I've Heard This Bob Dylan Song
Drunk guy to group of teens: If you're on the moon and you ain't got no shoes, man, you're outta luck.
Rye, New York
Overheard by: Grizzzly
Once Again, She's So Lucky I'm Not a Bitch!
Teenage girl with bad haircut: Ugh, I so just want to punch Lauren* in the face... She's lucky I'm not a bitch.
Overweight teenage boy: I know!
Teenage girl with bad haircut: I mean, seriously, all the time from here it's all "blah blah blah, I got raped." So annoying!
Overweight teenage boy: I know!
Teenage girl with bad haircut: I'd understand if it was once in a while... but dude, she talks about it all the time!
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: Lisa
You Could Just Steal the Boxed Set, Sweetie.
Teenage daughter: Mom, I have a plan for my future.
Mother: And what's that?
Teenage daughter: Save someone's life so they are indebted to me and will buy me the complete Twilight Zone boxed set.
Mother: Between this and your brother who I haven't seen in four days, I don't think I screwed up at all.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Categories: Colorado | Compare and contrast | Family ties | Moms | Parenting | Stupidity | TV shows | Teens | Posted 2009-11-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...As the Queen Said at Her Eulogy.
Teenage boy, about princess Diana: Dude, she was like Mother Teresa, just with better tits!
Palm Harbor
Florida
Overheard by: Jedtheavenger
Categories: About celebrities | Compare and contrast | Florida | Rack | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2009-11-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Let's Hope That's a New Metal Band
11-year-old: Haggis is awesome!
15-year-old: Damn straight! High five!
(they high five)
NSW
Australia
Categories: Australia | Compliments | Teens | Tweens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-11-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Knew This "Ellen" Haircut Was a Mistake
Two-year-old: Mommy!
Tired teen girl: I'm not your mommy.
Two-year-old: Daddy?
Preschool
Denver, Colorado
Categories: Colorado | Family ties | Kids | Kids | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Teens | Posted 2009-11-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So It's Likely He's Very Drunk.
Little girl: He's drunk, I swear!
Teenage sister: He's not drunk, he's a foreigner.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Overheard by: Julia
Categories: Colorado | Drinking & drunks | Kids | Kids | Language barrier | Siblings | Teens | Posted 2009-11-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, the One Where They Talk?
Teen girl #1: Do you think they have those other elephants here? You know, the old hairy ones?
Teen girl #2: Mammoths? No, I don't think they do. Aren't they extinct?
Teen girl #1: No, I'm pretty sure they have them at the Werribee zoo. Well, they were on that cartoon, with all the ice.
Zoo
Australia
Overheard by: Brydee
The Two Major Facets Of Life at the Playboy Mansion
Pissed-off teen: You can't get a bowl of salad but you can wash the dog naked?
Harrison, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Categories: Animals | Cleanliness | Compare and contrast | Food | Michigan | Questions | Teens | Posted 2009-11-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Which Is Why I Had You Guys Do Those Practice Drills Earlier
Volunteer director to group of teenage volunteers: Now, ya gotta be careful or the tractor tires will catch on fire.
Teenage volunteers: (incredulous laughter)
Volunteer director: No, seriously! Last year they caught on fire and I totally had to pee on them!
Sonoma County, California
Overheard by: where was I last year?!
I Am So Not Interested in Your Personal Hygiene
Teenage girl: I want to stop keeping it in my pants.
Effeminate teenage guy: No! Keep the stuff in your pants... in your pants!
Teenage girl: Yeah, it needs washing anyways.
Toronto
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Cleanliness | Clothes | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2009-11-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Want Sex from the Girl's Perspective, Consider Prison
Teenage boy to teenage girl: I wish I could get in the car with lesbians... Wait, no, I don't.
Tinton Falls, New Jersey
Categories: New Jersey | Sexuality | Teens | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2009-11-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Editors Are Also Totally Gay for Fuzzy Unicorn Shirts
Teen girl #1: Are you doing it with her, too?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, I'm totally gay for Meg* and her fuzzy unicorn shirt.
Teen girl #3, laughing and choking: I'm not suppose to die choking! I'm the only one who knows CPR!
Harrison, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Categories: Clothes | Clothing | Death & dying | Health & Hygiene | Michigan | Questions | Sex | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-11-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She's Worried I'll Don Their Gay Apparel
Teenage scene girl: I'm going to American Apparel to apply for a job.
Friend: Do you think you'll get the job?
Teenage scene girl: Yeah, but I don't think my mom will let me.
Friend: Why?
Teenage scene girl: There are lesbians there.
McDonald's
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Friends | Girls | Jobs & Careers | McDonald's | New York | Parenting | Questions | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Type Of Question That Should Be on the SATs
Teenage boy to school friend: Dude, why would you buy a pocket vagina and not use it?
High School
Hartford, Connecticut
Overheard by: Murray
Categories: Connecticut | Friends | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Shopping | Teens | Toys | Vagina | Posted 2009-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Here Comes Another One
Teen girl: This skirt is so short! My legs are freezing!
Teen boy: Mine are fine.
Teen girl: That's because of your intense orgasms.
Teen boy: True.
Starbucks
Burlington, Vermont
Overheard by: Sweenan A. Mornstuy
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Body parts | Clothes | Clothing | Compare and contrast | Orgasm | Teens | Vermont | Posted 2009-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So No One Will Even See Your Hooker Shoes
Mother to sixteen year-old in booty shorts and Uggs: You can be a geisha girl! It goes all the way down to the floor!
Halloween Store
New Jersey
Australian Sex Ed Is a Lot Different from Ours
Teenage girl: Orgies suck when they smell.
School
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: I worry about this girl
Categories: Australia | Gripes | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sensory experiences | Sex | Teens | Posted 2009-10-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As the Title Of My Autobiography Clearly States
14-year-old boy to punk friends: Jesus loves me, and I don't give a damn.
Portland, Oregon
That Would've Been Great Fodder for Our Dr. Phil Appearance
Teen girl: My brother got released from the loony bin today. Same day as he got a new roommate, who kills animals and has an extra Y chromosome. I'm like, "Goddamn!"
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Categories: Animals | Colorado | Health & Hygiene | Mental illnesses | Murder | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-10-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Jail, Yeah
Teenage girl #1: Anyway, I just need to talk to him.
Teenage girl #2: Mmm-hmm.
Teenage girl #1: But I barely ever see him!
Teenage girl #2: Yeah.
Teenage girl #1: I have to meet him in a mutual place, y'know?
Teenage girl #2: ...like a box?
Perth
Australia
Long Island Has Feminists?
Overbearing mother: Let her see you in the bra! She will make sure it fits correctly!
13-year-old girl, buying first bra: Mother, I'm not for sale!
Victoria's Secret
Long Island, New York
Are You...Part Cat?
Teenage girl to friend: I feel like if you eat my hair, we'll be more connected.
Fair Haven, New Jersey
Categories: Feelings | Friends | Hair | New Jersey | Relationships | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-10-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
At Least He Only Wanted My Clothes.
Teen to friends: Yeah, as if getting mugged isn't bad enough, it's even worse when the dude is naked.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: jfa.
Categories: Compare and contrast | Friends | Overheard in Minneapolis | Teens | Violence | Weirdness | Posted 2009-09-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Unless You Could Find Some Cute Coveralls
Blonde teenage girl #1: If I don't get asked to prom I might just drop out of school and become a mechanic.
Blonde teenage girl #2: I know... that would suck.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: high school
Categories: Education | Girls | Insults | Jobs & Careers | Overheard in Minneapolis | Teens | Posted 2009-09-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What-- Too Soon?
Teenage daughter: I had some caffeine pretty late tonight, so I'm gonna take an extra 50 milligrams of Seroquel.
Mother: I'll be sure to call Mary-Kate if anything bad happens.
Highlands Ranch, Colorado
Categories: About celebrities | Colorado | Family | Food | Health & Hygiene | Moms | Parenting | Teens | Posted 2009-09-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Best Part Of Our Lives Happens Between Our Ears
Teenage girl, talking about singer at concert: It was like Star Wars, except we weren't fighting with lightsabers and my hand didn't get cut off. Oh, and he was onstage and couldn't see me.
Rumson, New Jersey
Categories: Compare and contrast | Hands | Movies | Music | New Jersey | Stupidity | Teens | Violence | Posted 2009-09-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Undocumented Immigrant Surrogates Exist
Sloppily-dressed teen girl to another: Do you know how many new outfits I would have to buy to carry a baby around for nine months?
Sam Houston State University
Huntsville, Texas
If God Were Irish
Teenage girl: Potato chips are like flakes of god's skin.
Rumson, New Jersey
Categories: Body parts | Compare and contrast | Food | God | New Jersey | Teens | Posted 2009-09-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why Stupid People Will Always Outnumber Smart People: Explained
Teen girl #1: You know, I wish we had some sort of pregnancy switch that we can turn on and off at will. That way, when we have one night stands, we can just turn 'em off, and, voila! No baby!
Teen girl #2: We do. They're called diagrams.
Teen girl #3: You mean "diaphragms."
Teen girl #2: Whatever.
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Overheard by: Leila
A Damsel in Distress Can Count on a Guy Peeing on Her
Teen girl #1: I wish a jellyfish would sting me so some handsome guy would run along the beach, whip out his dick and pee on me.
Teen girl #2: What?
Teen girl #1: To neutralize the sting, dumbass.
Teen girl #2: I know that. But still: what?
Carleton University
Ottawa
Canadia
Why Child Psychologists Exist
Father, explaining electrical cables to teenage son: Yeah, she's got a transvestite in her wall. But you can convert the tranny back to a female, using the thing in the wall.
Wellington, New Zealand
Overheard by: Jordyn
Categories: Compare and contrast | Dads | Gender issues | New Zealand | Parenting | Science | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-09-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Cherry Poppin' Daddies Are on Tour Again
Teacher, on first day of school: So, did anything particularly exciting happen during your vacation?
Loud teenage girl at back of room: I lost my virginity... three times!
Edmonton
Alberta
Canadia
Earlier Today?
Teenage boy: Hey, James, don't you remember when you stuck Smarties down your shirt and rubbed them on your nipples?
On the Bus
Canadia
Overheard by: Kels
Wait-- Are Periods Supposed to Have Placentas?
Sarcastic teenage girl to mom: Guess who just got their period three days before prom!
Mom, putting hand over heart and exhaling in relief: Oh, thank god!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: Jon
Categories: Education | Health & Hygiene | Moms | Overheard in Minneapolis | Pregnancy | Teens | Posted 2009-09-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Tonight on Keeping Up With the Judashians
Teenybopper #1: So I haven't had my period in like six weeks!
Teenybopper #2: Girl, that means you must be pregnant!
Teenybopper #1: No, cuz then I'd have to be, like, a female Jesus!
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Health & Hygiene | Jesus | Massachusetts | Pregnancy | Teens | Posted 2009-09-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Girls Next Door Workout Video It Is, Then.
Teenage girl: We can't rent anything with class.
Blockbuster
Orlando, Florida
Just Say No to Jesus, Kids
Teen girl #1: He offered it to me in church--I mean, who offers someone marijuana in church?
Teen girl #2: When else could he do it?
Long Island, New York
Overheard by: Colleen
Categories: Christianity | Drugs | New York | Questions | Teens | Posted 2009-09-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You're the Worst Fairy Godfather Ever.
Sweet old man: How are ya, girls?
Teen girls: Better if we had some whiskey.
Gold Coast Big Day Out
Australia
Overheard by: yo bitch
Categories: Australia | Drinking & drunks | Old folks | Questions | Teens | Posted 2009-09-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You've Got Game If You Can Pick Up Girls at the Reading Room
Bearded old hobo: Heyyy, Cinderella.
Teenage girl: Um... hi!
Bearded old hobo: Want me to read the bible to ya?
Teenage girl: No thanks, I'm good.
Bearded old hobo: I know you are. (winks)
Outside Christian Science Reading Room
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Christianity | Hobos | Names | Offers and requests | Old folks | Teens | Weirdness | Wishes | Posted 2009-09-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Where the Naked Twister Game Is Taking Place
Teen boy #1: Haha, you have to be in the back of the bus.
Teen boy #2: Is that a race thing?
Teen boy #1: No, its a sexual thing.
Chestnut Hill, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Sara
Categories: Massachusetts | Public Transportation | Questions | Race | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-09-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And Did the Kangaroo See His Shadow or Not?
Teen boy: What month is it now? Like... spring or something, right?
Teen girl: Nah, I think it's still winter. Cause it's August.
Teen boy: Really? I swear winter ended, like, two weeks ago, ay.
Teen girl: Oh... maybe...
Teen boy: Yeah. So what is it now? Spring? Or autumn? Or winter?
Australia
Is Swamp Ass the Next Evolutionary Step? Discuss.
Teenage boy: Are you saying your asshole gets sweaty when I'm around?
Teenage girl: Exactly.
Northgate
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: NotSoSuperMario
Categories: Ass | Health & Hygiene | Questions | Sensory experiences | Teens | Washington | Posted 2009-09-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why I Could Never Teach Middle School
13-year-old preppy white girl: It be sneakah time, ya'll!
Deptford Mall
Deptford, New Jersey
Categories: Kids | Language barrier | Malls | New Jersey | Preppies | Stupidity | Teens | Whiteys | Posted 2009-08-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Nobody Ever Asked Elvis That
14-year-old boy #1: Dude, try my sunnies on! They're super dark!
(boy #1 hands glasses over to boy #2)
14-year-old boy #2: Cool, they are pretty dark!
14-year-old boy #3: Hey, cool! They totally go with your hair!
14-year-old boy #2: Are you queer?
Perth
Western Australia
Australia
Yeah, and I Had to Put Them Down!
Teen #1: Why didn't you send it to me?
Teen #2: I don't know. I sent you the humping cats.
Harrison, Michigan
Overheard by: Lauren
Is This Any More Stupid Than the Political Interpretation? Discuss.
Teenage girl #1, explaining Shakespeare to friend: So, basically, Romeo is, like, a man whore. As soon as he knows some chick won't have sex with him he gets all pissy and emo and goes after someone else.
Teenage girl #2: So, like, he just wants to make babies? Man, I always thought it was more romantic!
Teenage girl #1: Nope. He just wants to hop into bed with whoever's available.
Birmingham, Alabama
Maybe She's Good at It
Teenage girl #1: I don't understand how she has a boyfriend! She is so ugly!
Teenage girl #2: It's obviously because she puts out.
Teenage girl #1: So do I!
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: I'll be your boyfriend
Salem's Kind Of a Dead Town
Gay hairdresser: Ew, I don't think I could handle seeing dead people all gross and stuff!
Teenage girl getting haircut: You know, it's really not that bad... I kinda like it!
Straight hairdresser: Working downtown scares me sometimes...
Salem, Oregon
Categories: Clients | Compare and contrast | Coworkers | Death & dying | Fears | Oregon | Queers | Teens | Posted 2009-08-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Isn't Canadia Where TV Shows Go After Death?
Fab teenage girl with huge pink sunglasses: I fucking loved Sue Thomas: F.B.Eye! I have no fucking idea why they canceled it!
Teenage boy dressed in all black, munching cookie: Me neither. That was show was kickass.
Fab teenage girl: Probably 'cuz all the old people were like, "this show's really fucking gay." But I think that that one guy was really hot. Stupid fucking old people.
Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
My Generation Wisely Prefers Wii Relationships
Teen girl: They've broken up three times, and it never goes well for me.
Studio City, California
Overheard by: Urz
Categories: Bringing it back to you | California | Relationships | Teens | Posted 2009-08-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Leave Jay Manuel Alone, Already.
Teen boy #1: He's gay.
Teen boy #2: No, he isn't.
Teen girl: He's just orange!
Teen boy #2, laughing: "Orange" isn't a sexual orientation.
Teen boy #1, laughing so hard he's crying: I was just thinking that.
Teen boy #2: Hes like, an Oompa-Loompa. He's always so mean 'cause he's tall, they rejected him because he was different.
McDonald's
New York City, New York
Categories: Books | Compare and contrast | Gossip | McDonald's | New York | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-08-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like They Used to Do with Us!
Teenager, noticing little girl being led around by her mother on a leash: Look! White people be putting their kids on leashes!
The Galleria
St. Louis, Missouri
Ten Bucks Says They're American
Teenage tourist girl to friend: Wanna play connect the dots with my track marks?
Friend: (laughs nervously)
Teenage tourist girl: Also, if you do that stupid thing with your water glass again, I'm gonna strangle you, and throw you in a pit and put a dead dog on top of your grave. Pass me that cheese?
Pizzeria
Rome
Italy
Categories: Animals | Death & dying | Food | Friends | Italy | Offers and requests | Restaurants | Teens | Threats | Tourists | Weirdness | Posted 2009-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With Just a Hint Of Chlamydia
Drunken teenage girl, dancing down the street: I taste like fucking condoms!
Toronto, Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compare and contrast | Condoms | Dancing | Drinking & drunks | Drunks | Girls | Sensory experiences | Teens | Posted 2009-08-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Difference Between Bad Nazis and Good Nazis, Encapsulated
Teen girl: If I saw a really crazy sandcastle, I'd totally kick it down. Anyone would.
Teen sister: I would never, like, mess something up like that if someone was really good at something. Unless they were really good at something I hated. Like... being ugly.
Rumson, New Jersey
No One in Paris Ever Pees on Walls or Sits on Steps
Enraged Frenchman to woman and son who is discreetly peeing on wall: What is wrong with you? Find a bathroom, this is a business! (starts walking away and then comes to a woman and her teenage daughter sitting on steps) And you two, get out! What are you, from the mountains? (to himself, walking away) Oh my god! I don't believe this!
Fira
Santorini
Greece
Homer Simpson: Mmm, Sacrelicious...
Teen girl to friend: You know what I wanna do? Smoke a joint rolled in a page from the bible.
McDonald's
Ohio
Overheard by: Dylan
Categories: Christianity | Drugs | Friends | Girls | McDonald's | Ohio | Questions | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2009-08-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Australian Law Forbids Weekend Mourning
Teen girl #1: I think we need to get her a rebound guy.
Teen girl #2: Don't you think it's a bit soon? Paul died like two weeks ago.
Teen girl #1: Hmm. I guess. (pause) Maybe just for weekends then?
Teen girl #2: Yeah, okay.
Bus Stop
Brisbane
Australia
Overheard by: cara
Categories: Australia | Bus | Death & dying | Feelings | Girls | Questions | Relationships | Stupidity | Teens | Time Management | Posted 2009-08-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Ancient Egyptian Belief to the Contrary
Teenage girl: I'm pretty sure dead people don't have to eat.
Rumson, New Jersey
Categories: Death & dying | Food | New Jersey | Teens | Posted 2009-08-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Maybe a Blowjob or Two
Black teen employee to teen girl employee: Some of these people, they want to get to know you and make a connection, and I'm like, "man, I don't want to be your friend, I just want to give you a towel."
Marino Center
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Black people | Coworkers | Jobs & Careers | Massachusetts | Teens | Wishes | Posted 2009-08-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Beanstalk Giant Always Had Trouble Fitting In.
Teenager, chasing after young boy on bike: I'm gonna eat your children!
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: Li'l Bit
When Scientists Have Pinata Parties
Teen to another: Man, there's DNA all over the streets!
Shout-out: overheardlines.blogspot.com
Overheard by: jessica
Categories: Body parts | Health & Hygiene | Overheard Lines | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-08-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That Early-Morning Orgy Totally Messed with My Schedule
Underage girl, at 6 pm: Man, I knew I should've started drinking at 2!
Glengarry Highland Games
Canadia
Overheard by: is it that boring?
Categories: Canadia | Drinking & drunks | Teens | Time Management | Posted 2009-08-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She Wears Steel-Toed Boots.
Teen #1: I could fuck your sister.
Teen #2: Yeah? Well, I could fuck a horse.
Teen #1: No you couldn't.
Teen #2: Why not?
Teen #1: You can't just sneak up on a horse and fuck it in the ass.
Teen #2: I wouldn't sneak up on it, I'd let it know I was there.
Teen #1: You'll get kicked in the face. And you'll die.
Teen #2, quietly: Whatever, dude... Just don't fuck my sister!
New York City, New York
Categories: Animals | Ass | Death & dying | Family ties | New York | Sex | Teens | Violence | Posted 2009-08-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If We Could Transcribe Chimpanzee Conversations
Angsty teen #1: Why do you hate him?
Angsty teen #2: Because he's always putting shit in my hair.
Angsty teen #1: There are a million better reasons you could hate him for.
Angsty teen #2: Like what?
Angsty teen #1: Being him.
Bus Stop
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Overheard by: She should be a therapist.
Or He Was in This Porn I Once Saw.
Super gangster teen guy, looking at Victorian book: Yo, why there so many pictures from Greece and Rome?
Super gangster teen girl: Greek is in Rome!
Bedford
Nova Scotia
Canadia
Overheard by: Heather
The New Apartheid
Teen girl driving car: I'm turning left because I'm ugly.
New Zealand
Overheard by: passenger
Categories: Beauty | Girls | New Zealand | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-08-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Ruin Someone's Political Career?
15-year-old boy, covered in makeup: Why would you take photos if they aren't for MySpace?
Shout-out: community.livejournal.com
She's Broken a Lot Of Gay Hearts
Asian teenage girl, about sister who just left: She's so cute. She looks like a guy.
Sporting Carnival
Australia
Overheard by: Ouch
Categories: Asians | Australia | Beauty | Compare and contrast | Family ties | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-07-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With Sex, You Either Have a Good Time or a Good Story to Tell
Teenage girl: Yeah, he just couldn't orgasm! I spent like three hours on that shit, and after about an hour I was so thirsty I wanted to say "hold up, I'm gonna go get a big gulp." (friend bursts into laughter)
Birmingham, Alabama
...Or at Least Make Out in It.
Teenage girl being pushed in shopping trolley, singing loudly: Nineteen! You're only nineteen, for god's sake, oh, you don't need a boyfriend!
Teenage boy pushing girl, monotone: Everybody is looking at you. They think you're a lesbian.
Teenage girl: I feel like such a rebel! But we should return this trolley, like dutiful citizens.
Geelong
Victoria
Australia
Categories: Age and ageing | Australia | Compare and contrast | Relationships | Sexuality | Stupidity | Teens | Posted 2009-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In Hindsight, the Bible Could Have Been a Lot Worse
Young teenage girl with pink furry boots, rainbow hair, and seven facial piercings: Hey, if you were god, what would you do?
Young teenage boy with shaggy hair, acne, and a little boy face: I'd kill my foster parents.
Young teenage girl, totally ignoring her friend's response: I would totally make the world flat, so we could travel just by folding it in half. Imagine how much time and money I would save everyone!
Packed Train during Rush Hour
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
...Is It the Weekend Already?
Teen guy: Hey, Louise, do you wanna know why David broke up with you?
Teen girl: Because he was cheating on me...
Teen guy: No. Well, I shouldn't really say this, but David is gay.
Teen girl, surprised: Again?
Bus
Stockholm
Sweden
Categories: Bus | Gossip | Infidelity | Questions | Relationships | Sexuality | Sweden | Teens | Posted 2009-07-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Australian Baseball Is a Bit Different from Ours
Teen boy to group of friends: So okay, all we need to take with us is some glue, feathers, some petrol, and a lighter.
Friend: Cool.
Sydney
Australia
Judging from What I've Seen on YouTube
Teen daughter: Mom, what does an orgasm feel like?
Mom, looking at older daughter: Ask your sister, she'd probably know better than I would.
Portland, Oregon
Ummmm....
Teenage girl: Blowjobs are lesbian sex.
Red Bank, New Jersey
Categories: BJs | New Jersey | Sexuality | Teens | Posted 2009-07-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Embraced Your Principles and Your Boyfriend
Teen girl #1: We're the same person.
Teen girl #2: You have syphilis.
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: nyssa
Add Some Lower-Back Tattoos and She's Hot
Teenage boy, to group of friends: You take an ugly chick, stick her on a bike, and she's okay! (friends nod)
Old Town
Pasadena, California
Overheard by: The Girl, Kat
Categories: Beauty | California | Friends | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
More Like Interesting Fungal Formations
Teen: I don't know. I always have great art on my toes.
Choate Rosemary Hall
Wallingford, Connecticut
Categories: Body parts | Connecticut | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-07-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
See the Iron-On Label?
Mormon-looking hick teen: (holds up shirt and looks at his mother)
Hick mom: Gawd, no! That is Satan's shirt!
Wilmington, North Carolina
Overheard by: Amy
Categories: Clothes | Evil | Moms | North Carolina | Parenting | Religious fanatics | Teens | Posted 2009-07-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Lonely Old People Will Answer to Anything
Boy, to teenage girl: Hi, Lisa.
Old man, entering: Hi.
Cafe
Eugene, Oregon
I Get All My Internet News from the Radio
Teen girl: Hey guys! I heard there's going to be like, a digital Armageddon today!
Teen boy: I think that's a hoax.
Teen girl: No, but I heard it on the radio (pause) They wouldn't have reported it like that if it was fake.
Lancaster, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: H. G. Wells
Categories: Lies | Pennsylvania | Pop culture | Stupidity | Technology | Teens | Posted 2009-07-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hard to Believe, with All the Japanese Tourists.
Teen at Disneyland, loudly to a group of family and friends: Everyone's butt is obvious!
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Categories: Ass | California | Compare and contrast | Family | Friends | Teens | Weirdness | Posted 2009-07-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Let's Ask the Jews to Be on Our Side, Though
Teen girl to friend: We could be like the next Hitler, but cooler!
Friend: Oooh, awesome!
Toronto
Canadia
...If It Were Spelled with a Silent T.
Teenager: Hey, which terminal is baggage claim?
Airport employee: Terminal T.
Teenager: Wait...which one?
Airport employee: Terminal T. "T" as in "Charlie."
JFK Airport
New York City, New York
Overheard by:
Categories: Airports & flights | Employees | Names | New York | Public Transportation | Questions | Stupidity | Teens | Words | Posted 2009-07-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Unless My Cousin's Available.
Nerdy-looking teenage boy: No way, going to the school dance with a partner seriously decreases my chances of getting laid.
Outside School
Washington, DC
Categories: Dancing | Education | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sex | Teens | Washington, DC | Posted 2009-07-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Badly
Teenage boy, pointing at his dad: Kill him!
Mom: I can't do that! He just got his hair cut!
Dagenham
Essex
England
Overheard by: Anthony Mercer