Get the 10 best quotesby e-mail weekly!
Strangers All Categories > People > Strangers
Recent | Best Of
Americans Mistakenly Believe Silence Can Be Improved Upon
Russian girl: When I read in Russian, nothing can stop me. But when I read in English, I need silence.
American girl: That's what the music is for!
Train
Moscow to Nizhniy Novgorod
Russia
Overheard by: Adam Nathan
If Charles Dickens Had Gone to College in Florida
Girl: It was a land of chocolate and a land of Lego. It was glorious.
Random guy, walking by: Glorious!
University of Central Florida
Even the Preachers in Oregon Are Weirdly Crunchy and Alternative.
Freshman girl, emphatically to strangers: Roller derby saved my life! Roller derby saved all of our lives!
Eugene, Oregon
Overheard by: You've been playing for a month, shut up
There's Never a Truce in the Trench Warfare Between the Sexes
Older lady to complete strangers: So the last guy I dated, all he wanted was sex! We were on the beach and we passed a trench, and he was like "I'll put you in that hole!"
Escondido, California
Categories: California | Old folks | Relationships | Sex | Strangers | Weirdness | Wishes | Women | Posted 2010-09-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh, You're Just Still Pissed That I Stole Your Lucky Charms.
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: Fuck you! Fuck you, you hellspawn of Satan! You diseased monkey fucking dog wanking shitcunt!
Man, passing by: Pardon?
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: You heard me, you twat! You cocksucking pedophile wanker! (turning to passing woman) Excuse me my dear, I'm terribly sorry to bother you, but could you spare a pound?
Woman, passing by: Sorry, no.
Bearded elderly Irish tramp: God bless you! (turns back to passing man) Go fuck yourself, you cunt! I'll vomit on your fucking dog!
Leamington Spa
England
Overheard by: Bleep
Why Superman Gets So Much Girlie Action.
Younger heavy metal guy with older coworkers: I never find the right size of long johns in the winter, so I buy women's tights instead. (older coworkers look at him in shock) What? I was kidding! Morning humor, you know.
Macho guy sitting behind: Yeah, women's tights make your junk look bigger!
Commuter Train
Stockholm
Sweden
Overheard by: strictly boxers.
Twins!
Voice #1: I'm in the wrong bathroom!
Voice #2: I'm in the wrong bathroom, too!
Airport
Minnesota
Another Conflict in Which the Swiss Happily Remain Neutral
Overweight redhead Southern lady #1, looking through Switzerland t-shirts: Y'all, Ginger... I think this size is a li'l too small...
Overweight redhead Southern lady #2: Naw, I think that looks 'bout right.
Random lady: I thought we went on vacation to get away from the Southerners, not go find some more...
Lucerne
Switzerland
Overheard by: marisawin
Categories: Clothes | Clothing | Comebacks | Diet & weight | Europe | Fat people | Strangers | Tourists | Posted 2010-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You're Too Kind, Madame
Little girl, in Arabic, as she sits in the train: Smells like cotton candy!
Mother, in French: Yeah, you're right, it smells like cotton candy. (to grandmother) Don't you think it smells like cotton candy?
Young black woman, sitting in the next row, smiling: It's me. It's my perfume.
Mother: Really?! What is it?
Young black woman: Vanilla and cotton candy.
Mother: Really? My girl told me it smells like the amusement park. At first I thought it was the cleaning product they used to wash the train floor. (pause) It smells really good.
C Train
Paris
France
Overheard by: BBM Tm
Categories: Black people | Candy | Cleanliness | Compare and contrast | Family | France | Kids | Moms | Sensory experiences | Strangers | Train | Posted 2010-08-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
One Of Those Rare Days When the Sun Comes Out
Half-naked girl to clothed passerby: Whassup? It's just one of those days.
Clothed passerby: I hear ya.
Eugene, Oregon
When Stabbing a Stranger Is Okay: An Overheard Everywhere Short Story
Indecisive young woman to stranger: It's just so hard to chose which wallet I want!
Stranger: Er, yeah. I'm shopping for a gift for a friend.
Indecisive young woman, holding up two wallets: What do you think, the red or the black?
Stranger: Ummmmm... The black.
Indecisive young woman: Hmmmm. It's just that red is so classy, you know?
Stranger: Then take the red one.
Indecisive young woman: But red doesn't go with everything... Black goes with everything.
Stranger: Then take the black one.
Indecisive young woman: I don't know. I don't like the way it looks inside. I liked that brown one over there (points) but it's a color that would just get dirty so quickly, you know?
Stranger: Mmmm-hmmm.
indecisive young woman, holding up two other wallets: What do you think, what suits me best?
Stranger: Um, they're both nice. It's hard to say which is best.
Indecisive young woman: Oh, I know... Choosing a wallet is such a personal thing, you know?
Mall
Australia
Overheard by: which is why you ask a complete stranger for their opinion
The Kind Of Guy Who Takes Women's Studies Classes to Meet Chicks
Women speaking to crowd at rally: We're here to take a stand against violence towards girls and women!
Solo guy in middle of the crowd: Woo! Yeah!
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Can you yell innapropriate?
Dan Brown Totally Deserves This
50-something white-haired British guy: I know you!
Stranger: No sir, we haven't met.
50-something white-haired British guy: I remember you from before!
Stranger: I'm sorry sir, I just don't remember you.
50-something white-haired British guy: I was there too! We were both knights of Templar! You were Mary Magdalene's personal guard... How have you been all these years!?
Grand Canyon
Arizona
Overheard by: J
Categories: Arizona | Crazies | History | Memory lane | Strangers | Tourist attractions | Weirdness | Posted 2010-04-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Give Me That Seat, I'll Juggle Them for You.
Old man on subway to perfect stranger: So I give this woman three eggs to put in her pocket. You know, crack. And, can you hold this?
(young woman holds coffee for him)
Old man: So I've got these eggs...
Subway
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
When Enthusiasm Is Contagious
Strangely cheerful 30-something: I'm not shaking hands, or hugging, or anything anymore! I'm infected!
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Isn't infected
Categories: Canadia | Health & Hygiene | Strangers | Weirdness | Posted 2010-03-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Demographic Oprah Couldn't Reach
Delivery guy to guy wearing "Deadheads for Obama" t-shirt: So the Dead are for Obama?
Man: Uh-huh.
Delivery guy: Then so am I.
Burbank, California
Overheard by: Urzzz
Categories: California | Clothes | Compare and contrast | Employees | Music | Politics | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2010-01-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'll Stick to My Placenta Face-Cream, Thank You Very Much
Male wedding-goer to female wedding-goer: Oh, you guys work here? Excellent! My sister's husband, oh, I mean my brother-in-law, sells semen. Bull semen.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: best pick-up line ever
Categories: Animals | Cum | Family ties | Jobs & Careers | Overheard in Minneapolis | Strangers | Weirdness | Posted 2010-01-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But I'll Ask That the Contract Be Written on Recycled Paper
Greenpeace canvasser: Hey! Want to save some trees?
Lady: I don't have time right now. I have to go get rid of a man by divorcing him.
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Deana
Categories: Illinois | Questions | Relationships | Strangers | Time Management | Women | Posted 2010-01-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Minneapolis Does Its Public Service Announcements a Bit Differently
Guy on bike to random guy: Hey, do you know where Saint pedophilia is?
Random guy: Where?
Guy on bike: Saint pedophilia. It's a Catholic church by Saint Thomas where the priests molest little boys and turn them into homosexuals. (bikes away)
Random guy, stunned: What the fuck was that?
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: well, that was odd
Categories: Christianity | Kids | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Sex | Sexuality | Strangers | Weirdness | Posted 2010-01-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kim Jong-il Actually Pulls Off "Hobo" Flawlessly
Hobo, panhandling to passer-bys: Can anyone spare some change so I can buy a little wine, some booze, some cheese, a little pot... Maybe some nuclear weapons...
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: http://psychedelicmess.blogspot.com
Categories: Canadia | Drinking & drunks | Drugs | Food | Hobos | Money | Panhandling | Strangers | Violence | Posted 2009-12-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Not to Mention Tommy Lee's Package
Passerby, to himself: Man, they should totally make Google a wonder of the world. I mean, they already have Hollywood and shit.
Technology Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Rachael Johnson
Categories: Compare and contrast | Internet | Massachusetts | Strangers | Posted 2009-12-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Why Do You Think I'm Gay?
Crying girl: I have always wanted to have kids, you know? Now I can't.
Friend: It's really not that bad.
Crying girl: No, the doctor said I can never get pregnant!
Friend: Look at it this way: you can have tons of sex and never have to worry about it. I think it's a pretty sweet deal!
Random guy: I agree with you, sista.
San Francisco, California
Gotta Love Good Old-Fashioned Southern Courtship
Man in truck to woman in car: Hey there--you want a steak?
Woman: What? No.
Man: Even if it was in a box?
Woman: No, thanks, I'm cool.
Stoplight
Atlanta, Georgia
Because You Ate Them?
Man beside pen with goat: I am not paying that much for that! I am not buying your goat!
Goatkeeper: Nobody's buying the goat.
Man beside pen with goat: That's it, I'm taking the goat!
Goatkeeper: Nobody's taking the goat, we're not selling the goat!
Large passerby: There are no goats in Cameroon.
Toronto
Canadia
She Also Wondered This Throughout The Sound Of Music
Fashionable girl to singing man on bicycle: Excuse me, are you mentally ill or just musically inclined?
Düsseldorf
Germany
Overheard by: Anja Schwalm
Every Hollywood Party, in a Nutshell
Girl at party: These people are so disgusting! One guy actually called dibs on me.
Guy, loudly: Yeah, these people are douchebags.
Girl: Shhhh! They'll hear you!
Guy: So what?
Girl: Then they'll think I'm the one that brought all the weird people to the party.
Guy: You did.
Girl: But I don't want them to know that!
Random party guy: Yeah, dude, stop. You're embarrassing her in front of all the people she hates.
Columbus, Ohio
Get Thee to a Nunnery!
Strange man to lightly-dressed girls sitting on bench: Thank you! Have a good night!
(leaves)
Girl to friend: Oh my god. He licked your hand. Ohmigod! He. Licked. Your. Hand!
Montreal
Quebec
Canadia
Overheard by: And it tasted like humus.
If Porn Sites Sold Word-a-Day Calendars
Guy in courtyard: Areolas! Areolas! Areolas! Aaaareeeeoooolaaaas! Areolas! Areolas!
Voice from window: What the fuck?
Guy: Areolas!
Kent, Ohio
You're the Only One Who Can See Me, Anyway.
Old guy to total stranger celebrating birthday: When you're young you can make love to six women at a time, but when you're old you can only make love to three women at a time.
Birthday man: Three women is plenty for me.
Old guy: Don't tell anyone I said that to you.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: coco
Categories: Age and ageing | Compare and contrast | Old folks | Overheard in Minneapolis | Sex | Strangers | Posted 2009-09-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
According to Their Publicists
Passerby to two women getting off elevator with a double stroller with white and black babies: Uh-oh!
Women: Oh, it's okay. They're just friends.
Elevator, Westchester Mall
White Plains, New York
Fabio's Kids Are Quite the Handful
Mother to daughter: I think it's time to cut your hair again.
Daughter: No! I don't want it cut! You only cut it a few weeks ago! It's not fair! Why can't I have long hair? (pointing at passenger) She has long hair! (pointing at girl) She has long hair. Everyone has long hair except for me!
Son, smugly: Except for boys. (pause) But daddy has long hair...
Daughter: Even daddy has long hair! She has long hair, she has long hair--everyone has long hair except for me!
Perth
Australia
Overheard by: Emily B.
Categories: Australia | Compare and contrast | Family | Family ties | Hair | Moms | Parenting | Siblings | Strangers | Posted 2009-09-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Enemy Of My Imaginary Enemy Is My Imaginary Friend
Hip-hop thug on train bursts out, to no one in particular: Fuck you, man!
(spits on floor) You don't like it, do somethin' 'bout it. (pause) You want my dick? You want to be on my dick?
(silence).
Chica sitting opposite: Who are you talking to?
(hip-hop thug mumbles)
Chica: I don't think anyone wants to be on your dick.
Boston, Massachusetts
No One in Paris Ever Pees on Walls or Sits on Steps
Enraged Frenchman to woman and son who is discreetly peeing on wall: What is wrong with you? Find a bathroom, this is a business! (starts walking away and then comes to a woman and her teenage daughter sitting on steps) And you two, get out! What are you, from the mountains? (to himself, walking away) Oh my god! I don't believe this!
Fira
Santorini
Greece
Hey, It's Ms. Pac-Man-- I'm Not Gay.
Guy to stranger: Is it just me, or is that guy jerking off to Pac-Man?
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Fucking Buy Some, Drama Queen
Hysterical girl to people around her: Have you got crayons? Have you got crayons? Have you got crayons? Have you got any crayons? Do you have crayons?! Have you got crayons?!?! Argh! No one has crayons!
England
Categories: England | Girls | Offers and requests | Strangers | Stupidity | Posted 2009-08-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When Aunt Jemima Eats Burritos, Everyone Knows It.
Churchgoer to another: Did you fart? Something smells like buttermilk.
Methodist Church
Knoxville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Nick
Categories: Burping & farting | Compare and contrast | Food | Sensory experiences | Strangers | Tennessee | Posted 2009-08-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In Between and During Periods Of Incarceration
Woman to mother being slapped in the rear by little boy: Oooh, your son is bad!
Mother: Yeah, I think he's gonna be an ass man when he grows up!
Jersey City
New Jersey
Categories: Age and ageing | Ass | Kids | Kids | Moms | New Jersey | Parenting | Strangers | Violence | Women | Posted 2009-07-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If You Don't Accept My Low, Low Introductory Offer Right Now
Mother to kid: Stop that right now, or I'm going to give you to a stranger!
Stranger: Good luck finding one who'll take her.
The Baltimore Aquarium
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Cols
Categories: Family ties | Kids | Maryland | Moms | Parenting | Should have used a condom | Strangers | Threats | Weirdness | Posted 2009-07-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In Canadia, Even the Pedophiles Are Kinda Quaint
Lounging suburban man to passers-by: Your kids look like they want to do the chicken limbo.
Toronto
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: The cool aunt
The Camera Loves You, by the Way
Reporter to bodyguard for racist, fascist political party holding a press conference: Can you tell us why we're not being allowed to enter?
Bodyguard: You've printed repeated and insidious lies about our party.
Reporter, after long pause: We're a tv station.
Manchester
England
Yet You Know When Jennifer Aniston Changes Her Hair Color?
Mexican drag queen hosting a show: It's St. Patrick's day tomorrow...
Crowd: It's today!
Mexican drag queen: Is it tonight? I never know these things, I don't watch the news!
Gay Bar
Toronto
Canadia
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Canadia | Latinos | Queers | Strangers | Stupidity | TV shows | Time Management | Posted 2009-06-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Remember the Days When I Was the Only One?
Old woman to young stranger: Is that your mother?
Young woman: No, bitch. That's my bitch.
Old woman to friend: Kids have way too many bitches these days.
Union Station
Washington, DC
Categories: Default | Family ties | Kids | Old folks | Public transportation | Questions | Strangers | Washington, DC | Women | Posted 2009-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...I Put Down My Whip and Hugged Her
Attractive passerby: And then she was all like, "my parents would never press charges against you." And I was so touched...
Houston, Texas
Categories: Crimes | Default | Family ties | Feelings | Relationships | Strangers | Texas | Posted 2008-11-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Practically the Only Thing in Ottawa You Haven't Done
Slutty teen in very short skirt (yelling): Yo,what time is it?
Drunk passerby : (shows watch on wrist)
Slutty teen (indignantly): Like, I don't do analogue, bitch!
Ottawa
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Default | Drunks | Insults | Questions | Strangers | Technology | Teens | Time Management | Posted 2008-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Another Bird-Borne Illness Hits California
Moviegoer: I thought Carla didn't have a boyfriend because she got frumpy.
Landmark Theater
Los Angeles, California
Categories: California | Default | Names | Relationships | Strangers | Posted 2008-09-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Relax-- That Just Means It Likes You
(strange loud sound comes from the plane)
Calm but confused flight attendant: That's weird, I've never heard that before.
Freaked out passenger: Um, excuse me? What?!
Flight to Cancun, Mexico
Categories: Airports & flights | Default | Flight attendants | North America | Public Transportation | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Likes to Go to Parties and Get Fried
Bus driver: So who else is gonna be there?
Passenger: Chicken boy will be there.
Bus driver: "Chicken boy"?
Passenger: Yeah, you know Dave*. That fool always smells like chicken! I always thought it was just me but at a party last week Elizabeth* and her friends all called him "chicken boy" too!
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Dawn
Categories: Bus drivers | Default | Names | Questions | San Francisco | Sensory experiences | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Bambi Theme Party Was a Better Idea in Theory Than in Practice
Party host to guest: Watch out for the skunk in the bathroom.
Guest: What?
Party host: Seriously.
Columbus, Indiana
Overheard by: Projection1234
Drive-by Guiltings Are Far Too Common in Marin County
Mother to daughter: Come on!
(daughter rolls eyes and follows)
Random man to young girl: Is that your mother? You should be thrilled! Mine's dead!
Marin County, California
Categories: California | Death & dying | Default | Family ties | Moms | Offers and requests | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...As This Photo Album Clearly Illustrates
Girl #1: Oh my god, black guys have the biggest penises in the world.
Girl #2: No way!
Girl #1: Really, it was as big as my thigh.
Random lady sitting next to them: Oh my god, they are!
Los Angeles, California
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Penis | Race | Strangers | Posted 2008-08-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'll Bet You Say That to All the Girls
(outside of a coffee shop downtown late at night)
Hipster chick: So then I went to the store and found out the shoes were discontinued but...
Creepy guy (with unzipped and unbuttoned pants): What are you guys talking about? Can I talk or are you going to kick me out?
Hipster chick: Uh... (looks around for a quick exit) No man, you can stay. We're talking about shoes.
Creepy guy: You're so hot. No, really. I would kiss you like you'd never think about shoes again.
Akron, Ohio
Overheard by: Julia M
Categories: Clothes | Compliments | Creepsters | Default | Etiquette | Hipsters | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Kink | Ohio | Strangers | Weirdness | Posted 2008-07-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How I Met Your Mother
Drunk man to woman passing by: Fornication is evil! Thou shalt be kind to your neighbours!
Woman: Yeah, well, god built the Nevada desert and the Colorado River and then we came and built the Hoover Dam, leaving people without water or resources. So just by being here we're fucking over our neigbours.
Drunk man: Can I kiss you?
Outside The Flamingo
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Steph
Categories: Default | Drinking & drunks | Drunks | Evil | Gripes | Nevada | Strangers | US Geography | Women | Posted 2008-07-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Better Have to Swim Through Her Blood When We Disembark
Metro announcement: The Red Line is experiencing delays due to a sick customer at Farragut North... Trains will share tracks at Gallery Place and Metro Center.
Man on metro: How sick was this customer?
Woman on metro: She better be dead, I'll tell you that.
Washington, DC
Overheard by: jposkin
Categories: Death & dying | Default | Guys | Maladies | Public Transportation | Strangers | Washington, DC | Women | Posted 2008-07-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And He Let Me Touch His Mallard?
Girl: Hey, what about that time we went duck hunting naked and...
Random passerby: That sounds like fun!
Georgetown
Washington, DC
Categories: Animals | Body parts | Default | Girls | Memory lane | Sex | Strangers | Washington, DC | Posted 2008-07-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It'd Be a Match Made in Heaven If She'd Only Stop Stealing My Watch
Girl: Who are you dating now?
Guy: I don't know if you'd call it dating, but I met a stripper that comes over around midnight, gets me high, sucks my dick, we fuck, I fall asleep and when I wake up, she's gone.
Random eavesdropper: Dude, marry that bitch!
Open Bar
San Diego, California
Categories: BJs | California | Default | Drugs | Girls | Guys | Questions | Relationships | Sex | Strangers | Posted 2008-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
See My Rattail?
Man at bar: What do you girls do for a living?
Attractive women: We're in sales, you?
Man: You're in sales? I think you need a career change.
Women: I'm sorry, what do you do?
Man: I'm with the carnival.
Country Bar
Fort Worth, Texas
You're Just in Time to See the Internet Made Illegible
Soldier: What is that thing?
Passenger #1: An iPhone.
Passenger #2: Man, where the hell have you been?
Soldier: Iraq.
Flight from Minneapolis to Pittsburgh
Categories: Airports & flights | Cell phones | Default | Geography | Military | Questions | Strangers | USA | Posted 2008-06-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Trust Me --That's My Schtick
Overly optimistic girl: He's kinda sketchy, but in a nice way.
Passing stranger: Not possible!
Concordia University
Montreal
Canadia
Categories: Advice | Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Girls | Strangers | Words | Posted 2008-04-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sometimes I Add Light Slapping.
Man: Hey, asshole, get off the cellphone.
Dude: Excuse me...?
Man: The street car is a public space. Get off the cellphone or get off the street car!
Dude: No.
Man: Yes! I don't want to have to hear you yapping away--
Dude: --Why don't you get off, then, buddy?
Man: This is a public space! Stop polluting the space with your hot air!
Dude: No.
Man: Yes.
Dude: No! [Into cell] Oh, nothing, Bruce. Just some loser on the street car...
Man: Hey!
Dude: Yeah?
Man: You're fat and ugly, you know that?
Dude, leaving: Screw you!
Man, to entire street car: I do this every Sunday...
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: damn hiatus
Categories: Assholes | Canadia | Cell phones | Gripes | Strangers | Posted 2008-02-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Nor Breed Outside of Our Immediate Gene Pools
Cheerful guard examining passport photo: What, no smile?
Dour Canadian: No. In Canada we do not have to smile.
O'Hare International Airport
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Rose Fox
Translation: My Kids Are Greedy Little Assholes
Little girl with mother: My birthday's coming up soon, so I don't want to get anything for me.
Woman in opposite aisle: There is no way that child is human.
CVS
Houston, Texas
Categories: Etiquette | Glad the condom broke | Gossip | Strangers | Texas | Posted 2008-01-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Uncontrollable Urge to Enter Other People's Conversations, for Instance
Guy to girl: Hey, remember when my grandfather went through that phase where he wanted us to be Jewish?
Passerby: It's overrated.
Guy: ... What?
Passerby: Being Jewish -- it's overrated. There's a lot of baggage.
Public Gardens
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Massachusetts | Religion | Strangers | Posted 2008-01-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Geez, I'm Trying
Crew member: Sir, you can't stand here.
Old man, blocking walkway: [Ignores him.]
Crew member: Sir! This is a walkway.
Old man: This is foolishness!
Passerby: Why don't you just die, already?
Disneyland
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: uncomfortably waiting for the damn fireworks
Categories: California | Gripes | Old folks | Strangers | Posted 2008-01-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Gay Passerby: Wait, Now I'm Offended.
Native American woman to lady dressed as Indian: I find your costume very offensive.
Lady dressed as Indian: No... But I'm part of the Village People [points to girls dressed as cop and construction worker].
Native American woman, after long pause: Oh, well, that's okay, then.
Calgary Stampede
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Um, Which Other Parts Would It Be Okay to Comment On?
Guy to girl dancing on street corner: Shake that ass, girl!
Girl: Thank you!
Guy: Sorry, I'm being an asshole.
Girl: It's okay -- I got the goods!
Chicago, Illinois
Categories: Ass | Compliments | Illinois | Strangers | Posted 2007-11-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
By the Bondage Fairies, in Particular
Man browsing anime collection: [Sneezes.]
Bystander: God bless you.
Man browsing anime collection: Yes, yes, I am blessed.
Newbury Comics, Harvard Square
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Overheard by: sinner
Categories: Etiquette | Massachusetts | Strangers | Posted 2007-11-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Excecuting" -- God, I Kill Me!
Express care doctor: Really, I think Kevorkian had the right idea. He just went about executing it the wrong way.
Marquette General Hospital
Michigan
Who Looks a Little Like Danny DeVito
50-ish guy: ... And now I inherited his twin sister!
Woodstock, New York
Categories: Family ties | New York | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Your Coquetry Piques My Curiosity
Dude: I want to fucking make out with you.
Chick: Yeah?
Dude: Yeah, maybe I will later.
Chick: Maybe.
Troy, New York
Overheard by: Andrew
Categories: K-I-S-S-I-N-G | New York | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Simply Take His Hand Out of My Pants?
Guy forcing way through crowded dance floor: Excuse me, you fucking beautiful bitch.
Girl, stepping aside, then suddenly turning to friend: Should I be offended?
Privilege
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: elise
Categories: California | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Oh, This One's for Throwing
Girl: May I have a Long Island Iced Tea?
Bartender: Sure.
80-year-old lady sitting at bar: Giiirl, I hope you took yo' birf control today!
Klondike Kate's
Newark, Delaware
Overheard by: Cols
Categories: Advice | Delaware | Drinking & drunks | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Disagree on What "City of Brotherly Love" Really Means
Scene guy: Come back! I want a hug!
Guy quickly leaving on bicycle: Eat my shit!
Scene guy: I want my hug!
Guy quickly leaving on bicycle: Eat my shit!
22nd and Chestnut Street
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: catty
Categories: Insults | Pennsylvania | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Liberals Can't Believe That Some Plagues Cure Themselves
Liberal #1: Cut off her head!
Liberal #2: No! Then she wouldn't feel any of the pain!
Liberal #1: Yeah, you're right... I suppose you could cut her head off half-way...
Passerby: Um, I don't mean to interrupt, but, um, what are you talking about?
Liberal #1: How to kill Ann Coulter.
Liberal #2: Is that bad?
Passerby: Oh, no, continue! By all means, please!
After concert at Hollywood Bowl
Hollywood, California
Overheard by: Argonath
Categories: California | Murder | Strangers | Posted 2007-10-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Don't Harsh My Mellow
Woman to herself: I love the smell of the subway!
Passerby: You know it's primarily piss, right?
Consolação subway
São Paulo
Brazil
And As Ghetto As Anyone Gets in Toronto
Man: ... With my wife.
Woman: Oh, you're married?
Man: Yeah, and I have a four-month-old baby girl.
Woman: What's her name?
Man: Widget.
Woman: Oh, that's cute.
Subway
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: Nick B
I Myself Am an Intel-American
Chick: What's your background?
Girl with laptop: ... Uh, I'm part Korean...
Chick: No, I meant on your computer.
Idyllwild, California
Categories: California | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2007-09-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Didn't Drop the Other One on the Floor
Dude, approaching table of people: Excuse me? Hi, I noticed you put your salad in the microwave, and I was just wondering... Why?
Asian guy: Why not?
Dude: Well, it's just... you had two... And you didn't put the other one in... I have to know!
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: a'da
Categories: Overheard at Cornell | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2007-08-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Me, Too!
Girl on street: I like your hat!
Man on bike: Thank you!
Girl on street: I was just kidding!
Shout-out: www.overheardquote.com
Categories: Insults | Overheard Quote | Strangers | Posted 2007-08-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Your Country
Charity guy: Hello there. I'm Australian, and I'm giving out free hugs.
Girl: Okay then [hugs him].
Charity guy: What about your friends here?
Girl: Oh, they're German. They don't want hugs.
Redhill
Surrey
England
Some Day That Line's Going to Work
Man: What's your name?
Woman: Juna.
Man: That reminds of me of a tree... A beautiful tree.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: leslie
Categories: Names | Overheard in PDX | Strangers | Posted 2007-08-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
David Is a Fully-Functional Dildo As Well
Carpool driver, noticing woman at bus stop: She has art between her legs.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: b!X
Categories: Gossip | Overheard in PDX | Strangers | Posted 2007-07-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You're Not Still Pregnant?
Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you must be having a boy!
Very preggers: Uh, no... It's actually a girl.
Enthusiastic lady: Really? Because your face has changed!
Very preggers: What do you mean?
Enthusiastic lady: Oh, you know, it just looks bad. I was ugly, too, when I was pregnant with my son.
Clinic waiting room
San Francisco, California
Categories: Insults | Preggers | San Francisco | Strangers | Posted 2007-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wait, No, She's Just Really Tan! Oh My God!
Passerby: Oh my god! Look at that woman's outfi-- Oh, never mind. She's ethnic, it's okay.
Tucson, Arizona
Overheard by: Rasputin
Of Course!
Teen #1: Dude, gross!
Teen #2: Come on, man! Don't act like that, you've wondered if it was worth it having your asshole licked during sex, too!
Teen #1: Yeah, but not by a fat Asian chick!
Stranger: Was it worth it?
Modern Skate and Surf
Royal Oak, Michigan
Wasn't That a Super Smash Brothers Character?
20-ish girl #1: Yeah, I was called 'Sweet Pea' all the time when I was little.
20-ish girl #2: To this day my dad calls me 'Peanut.'
Fat lady nearby, to no one: Yeah, I got a nickname, too. They call me 'Jiggly Puff.'
TGIFridays
Palm Beach Gardens, Florida
Overheard by: I can't imagine why.
I Assume Martha Stewart Makes One
Loud outburst from quiet conversation: What kind of pan do you have that you can cook a head in it?!
8000 Foothills Boulevard
Roseville, California
Overheard by: Drew
Categories: California | Questions | Strangers | Posted 2007-07-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Necessity Is the Mother of Water-Bottle Bongs
Leader of group of nervous teens: Hey, do you sell rolling papers here... for tobacco?
Convenience store clerk: Sorry, man. We've only got ones for pot.
Noland Road
Independence, Missouri
Overheard by: snickering customer behind them
If You'd Read Any Whorf, You'd Know What I Mean
Pretty lady: You say a lot of bad words. Some people say that happens when you don't have the intelligence to express your self otherwise.
College kid: That ain't the case with me. I got a fuckin' vocabulary, man. I just use words everyone understands, like 'shit' and 'fuck' and what-not, so I don't obfuscate my meaning.
Panama City, Panama
Mi Gasa Es Su Gasa
Man #1: Are these seats taken?
Man #2: No, they are not, but I have to warn you -- we both had Chinese food for dinner, so we are going to have some major gas in a little bit.
Man #1: That's fine, we had Thai.
Man #2: Oh, then we're even. Have a seat.
Consolidated Theaters
Silver Spring, Maryland
Overheard by: feeling a little gassy myself
Categories: Burping & farting | Maryland | Strangers | Posted 2007-06-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Impossible Not To
Princess at front of bus: ... And I went through seven laptops in high school.
Passenger: Oh, yeah? I went through ten laptops in high school!
Princess, offended: It's rude to eavesdrop, you know!
5 bus
San Francisco, California
Categories: Gossip | San Francisco | Strangers | Posted 2007-06-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Who Has Access to All The Sex Manuals Ever Printed
Middle-aged woman to 20-something: I never knew there was that much variety in shape, size, color and girth. I'm talking about butt plugs. Oh, I'm sorry. You look shocked. I forgot -- you're just a librarian.
Wedding reception, Caesar's Palace, 3570 Las Vegas Boulevard South
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: Sarah
Categories: Jobs & Careers | Nevada | Strangers | Toys | Posted 2007-06-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Take That Back or I'll Give You an Atomic Wedgie Right Here
Late 20s drone in front of train operator's door: Excuse me, can you move forward? The operator said I'm blocking the window.
Late 40s suit: No, you move forward. This is my spot.
Late 20s drone: We're both blocking the window, and I can't move unless you do.
Late 40s suit: I'm not moving.
Late 20s drone, groaning: You're an ass.
Late 40s suit: No, you're an ass.
Late 20s drone, pushing past: Oh, fuck you.
Late 40s suit, mocking: Oh, fuck you.
Late 20s drone: Good luck in third grade.
BART train, Bay Point - Daly City line
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: baby boomers must die
Categories: Insults | Jerks | San Francisco | Strangers | Train | Posted 2007-05-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
