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Do I Need to Draw Those Diagrams for You Again?
Preppy cutie, about steroided-up jock: Oh my god! He just winked at me!
Sarcastic friend: You sure it's not a twitch?
Preppie cutie: Your mom has a twitch! That's how she had you!
(friends stare)
Friend: What?!
El Paso, Texas
Overheard by:
NewsFlash: Tim Burton Slated to Direct Next Bring It On! Movie
Teen girl #1: I don't get why they put "eat it" by the cheerleaders.
Teen girl #2: Me neither. You can't, like, eat cheers.
Teen girl #1: Yeah... But you can eat cheerleaders.
High School
Kansas
Best. Preschool Teacher. Ever.
Preppy girl on cell: You know, why don't you talk more? Why don't you participate? I just wish you would say something not stupid.
Somerville, Massachusetts
Overheard by: timmmm
Categories: Massachusetts | On the phone | Preppies | Stupidity | Wishes | Posted 2010-10-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Straight Guys Totally Understand Why Girls Like Girls
Short skinny emo girl: I'm half gay.
Preppy dude walking by: There is so much to say there, so much to say.
Natick, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Un-gay friend.
Categories: Gender issues | Girls | Massachusetts | Preppies | Sexuality | Skinny people | Posted 2010-08-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...For Knowing What Guys Like
Preppy girl #1: So, Emily's a total slut.
Preppy girl #2: I know, right?
Preppy guy: Wait, what's she like?
Preppy girl #1: Umm, like, a d.
Preppy girl #2: No, no, no: double d.
Preppy guy: I was talking about her personality, but thanks...
Starbucks
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Gossip | Insults | New York | Preppies | Posted 2010-06-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...Now That I Can Suck My Own Nipples.
Preppy tween girl #1: So you're grounded?
Preppy tween girl #2: Worse. My mom threw away my pacifiers.
Madison, Wisconsin
...Would You Like to Go Out With Us This Friday?
Freshman boy trying to flirt with girl: I'm from Boston and he's from Boston and he's Chinese and he likes Bruce Lee, naked, naked, naked. (pokes Chinese friend)
University Library
Binghamton, New York
Overheard by: Brianna
Categories: About celebrities | Colleges & Universities | New York | Preppies | Sexuality | Posted 2010-03-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Just Saying Never Aim Your Junk at a Cat
High school dude #1: It's like bestiality, only you have to make sure you point it the right way.
High school dude #2: Yeah, that shit's important.
Santa Ana, California
Categories: Animals | California | Preppies | Sex | Weirdness | Posted 2010-02-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wanna See My Needlpoint Thong?
High school freshman, examining friend's boot in hallway: These are like hooker boots, except crochet.
High School
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: One fine piece of needlework
Categories: Compare and contrast | Pennsylvania | Preppies | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Shoes | Posted 2010-02-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Your Answer to Everything!
Preppy girl #1: You know you can't have sex for like, six moths after you have an abortion?
Preppy girl #2: That's stupid! Why wouldn't you just fall down some stairs?
Classroom
Ontario
Canadia
The "Hugs, Not Drugs" Campaign Has Had Mixed Results
Huge gangsta boy: Maaaan, gimme a hug!
Preppy white friend: What?! No!
Huge gansta boy: What the fuck, man, just gimme a goddam hug!
High School
Nashville, Tennessee
Categories: Feelings | Friends | Insults | Offers and requests | Preppies | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Tennessee | Thugs | Whiteys | Posted 2010-01-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, It's Not Messy-- It's Calligraphy.
Preppy white boy: You're both women, and you're Asian! How can you have messy handwriting??
Professor: Wait, did I really just hear that?
Indianapolis, Indiana
Overheard by: The non-asian woman
Categories: Asians | Compare and contrast | Gender issues | Indiana | Preppies | Questions | Race | Stupidity | Teachers | Whiteys | Posted 2010-01-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Well, It Was Just Rain.
Preppy girl #1: So I had it all over me, it was on my hands and my face...
Preppy girl #2: Oh my god! Did you throw up?
San Luis Obispo, California
Categories: Body parts | California | Cum | Hands | Health & Hygiene | Preppies | Questions | Sensory experiences | Weirdness | Posted 2009-09-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hey, Even Hoboes Have Bad Days
Preppy guy on cell: Really? He didn't spit on me when I fed him the other day.
Cal Poly Pomona
Pomona, California
Overheard by: sorry, my llama is unpredictable
Categories: California | Food | Health & Hygiene | On the phone | Preppies | Posted 2009-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Why I Could Never Teach Middle School
13-year-old preppy white girl: It be sneakah time, ya'll!
Deptford Mall
Deptford, New Jersey
Categories: Kids | Language barrier | Malls | New Jersey | Preppies | Stupidity | Teens | Whiteys | Posted 2009-08-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So We Didn't Do the Hanksta-Panksta
Preppy Hispanic girl: He thinks he's so gangsta-gangsta, but he's not. He's a wangsta-wangsta.
Nashville, Tennessee
Categories: Compare and contrast | Latinas | Preppies | Stupidity | Tennessee | Posted 2009-06-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
No Wonder King Cole Isn't a Merry Old Soul Anymore
Preppy college girl to friend: She was the girl who would go down on him while lighting his bowl. She was the perfect girl for him. It's too bad she went crazy, they would have been so happy together!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: burrhead.
Categories: BJs | Compare and contrast | Default | Friends | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Overheard in Minneapolis | Preppies | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2008-12-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But at Least I'm Passing His Biology Class This Time
Preppy girl on cell: Yeah. He just got out of jail and he's hitting on me again.
Salem Community High School
Salem, Illinois
Overheard by: LiLlistna
Categories: Crimes | Girls | Illinois | On the phone | Preppies | Relationships | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Threats | Posted 2008-11-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...In Unrelated News
Preppy guy #1: "Pangaea," like the continent?
Preppy guy #2: Yeah, my sister just had a face lift.
Wal-Mart
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: Rev Loon
But I Can't Afford the Membership Fee
Preppy chick: I didn't see you in class today. Where were you?
Guy: I was having sex in the bathroom.
Preppy chick: Oh, I want to try that.
Florida
Ashley Olsen Dating Lance Armstrong Was the Final Nail in the Coffin
Preppy girl #1: So the Apocalypse is totally going to happen... It's scary.
Preppy girl #2: Yeah, I know, right?
High School Hall
Ontario
Canadia
The EMTs Can Just Pull Him Out From Under It
Preppy Asian chick on cell: I don't care if he's dying. I'm not going to move my car from a parking spot.
University of Tennessee
Overheard by: Jessica
Categories: Asians | Colleges & Universities | Death & dying | Default | Girls | Offers and requests | On the phone | Preppies | Weirdness | Posted 2008-09-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
His Hair Desperately Needed Product
Really preppy girl to preppy friends: Like, Jesus had problems too!
Ithaca, New York
Overheard by: Ananda
She Just Goes There to Have Sex in the Steam Room.
Preppy girl: I woke up this morning and my legs were so sore! And then I couldn't remember why they were hurting! I was so worried, especially since I went out last night and Wednesday nights are usually when I stay in. And I couldn't remember anything that happened. But then I thought, "Oh, wait, I went to the gym yesterday. That must be it."
Lawrence Hall, Colgate University
Hamilton, New York
Categories: Body parts | Colleges & Universities | Default | Girls | Maladies | New York | Preppies | Time Management | Posted 2008-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And We're Almost Out of Birdseed
Preppy chick to friend: ...and I was thinking of Puppy Chow for dessert tonight because, you know, it's easy to make.
Ohio State University
Overheard by: GameBoy Kid
Which Is Why My Boyfriend's Here at the Doctor's
Guy: Do you spit or swallow?
Preppy girl: I don't know. I just chew.
Florida
And Lacoste Was So 1998
Homeless woman to preppy kid in pink shirt: Don't mix your reds and your whites!
Boulder, Colorado
It Is Important to Air Things Out
Preppy girl: I love not wearing pants.
[Friends start to laugh.]
Preppy girl: No! I mean have you ever gone to the beach and --you just take off your bottoms and --no! I mean you like take off your swimsuit bottoms--.
[Friends erupt in laughter.]
Preppy girl: I just mean --I just like not wearing pants...
High School
San Diego, California
Categories: California | Clothes | Feelings | Friends | Girls | Preppies | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Words | Posted 2008-06-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Terry McAuliffe: Shhhhhh!
Preppy brunette on cell: So did you hear? Hillary won the primaries yesterday! [Pause.] Wait, you mean there's more than one?
JMU Bookstore
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: baffled
The National Association of Farmers Convention Can Get Rowdy
Preppie guy: ... And I said, "That's why I trade corn futures!" [Entire table erupts in raucous laughter.]
Ethiopian restaurant, 12th & U
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Bragging | Guys | Jobs & Careers | Preppies | Restaurants | Washington, DC | Posted 2008-05-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kendra Wilkinson's Major Life Accomplishment
Preppy girl on cell: the longest amount of time I've had pubic hair is three days.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: kt
Categories: Default | Etiquette | Gender issues | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Massachusetts | On the phone | Preppies | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Shaving | Teens | Vagina | Posted 2008-04-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Doesn't Seem Like Much of a Stretch for Either of Us
Preppy guy: You're such a bitch, Alexandra.
Alexandra: Thanks?
Preppy guy: No, in a good way.
Alexandra: How can you be a bitch in a good way?
Preppy guy: You're the kind of bitch that makes me wish I was gay so we could sit at an outside cafe and make fun of people's outfits when they walk by.
Starbucks, Newbury Street
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: i want to, too!
You're Both Right!
Preppy girl #1: Wow, now we all have the same necklace! We should all wear them the next time we go out!
Preppy girl #2: Yeah! We'd be like the Power Rangers or something!
Preppy girl #3: Or we'd be like douchebags.
Eastern Market
Washington, DC
Overheard by: office peon does d.c.
Categories: Comebacks | Default | Fashion | Girls | Insults | Offers and requests | Preppies | Stores | Washington, DC | Posted 2008-03-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hypothetically. If I Had Done It. Which I Didn't.
Private school girl: Did I tell you what Jane* asked me?
Best friend: No.
Private school girl: She was all like, 'Did you hook up with a homeless guy?' and I was all like, 'No, of course not! Never say that again!'
Best friend, laughing hard: I can't believe you did that!
Private school girl: What, hooked up with a homeless guy? It's not a big deal.
Haight Street
San Francisco, California
Categories: California | Chicks | Friends | Preppies | Questions | Relationships | Posted 2008-02-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
... In Utah
Preppy girl: Oh my god, I have, like, two wives. I think I have a husband... I used to have a boyfriend and two wives.
Guy: That seems to happen to a lot of people...
Amherst, Massachusetts
Overheard by: shiny
Categories: Massachusetts | Preppies | Relationships | Posted 2008-01-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That, and the Shrapnel
Preppy girl #1: Yeah, so he's going to be in Iraq until early December, and then he gets to be here until early January, and then he starts his second tour.
Preppy girl #2: That's awesome.
Preppy girl #1: Yeah, except that he's dating my best friend.
Judiciary Square Metro Station
Washington, DC
Overheard by: V
Categories: Gossip | Preppies | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-12-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's a Subtle Wine/Beer Distinction
Preppy girl: Wait, Irish people are from Ireland? I always thought they were from Italy!
Memorial High School
Manchester, New Hampshire
Overheard by: Lily F.
Categories: New Hampshire | Preppies | Stupidity | Posted 2007-10-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Pink Bow Might Be Pretty
Preppy teen girl #1: Well, do you like her?
Preppy teen girl #2: I mean, yeah, I like her... But she has got to do something about her mustache!
Newport News, Virginia
Overheard by: Sam
Same Thing
Preppy guy on cell: So, you're pissed. I guess 'cause I lied. Or, yeah, I understand -- 'cause I had sex with someone else last night. What was I supposed to do, wake up and say, 'Oh, hey, I have a girlfriend' to her? ... Look, babe, I love you, but I'm 19 and I'm human.
Drunk guy from dorm window: And an asshole!
Boston College
Newton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Drew
Categories: Drunks | Infidelity | Massachusetts | Preppies | Posted 2007-09-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hobo: Directions? That'll Be One Blow Job
Preppy girl: Can we have our cell phones on for the field trip?
Teacher: No.
Preppy girl: But what if we get separated from the group? How will we find our way back?
Female peer: Ask a friendly hobo.
Hume-Fogg High School
Nashville, Tennessee
Since It Squirted Me
Preppy girl: I want a t-shirt! I mean, I stuck my head in a vagina -- I totally deserve one!
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: what would you do for a tee shirt?
Categories: Overheard at Cornell | Preppies | Vagina | Posted 2007-08-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Says She's Saving All That for Marriage
Preppy chick: I've never seen her pee in a bush or even fart or anything. It's like I only know her on one level, you know?
Harvard Station
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Massachusetts | Philosophy | Preppies | Posted 2007-07-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
... And That's How I Landed My First Bellhop
Loud preppy undergrad: So I said to him, 'Either you sleep with me or you clean the sheets.'
Alexander's Restaurant
Saskatoon, Saskatchewan
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Health & Hygiene | Preppies | Restaurants | Posted 2007-04-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Genetic Engineering Has a Long Way to Go
Preppy freshman chick leaving dining hall: So, life decision for today: I want to become a Gummi Bear!
University of Mary Washington
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Anna Deaton
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Philosophy | Preppies | Students | Virginia | Posted 2007-03-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
