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Where You Will Be Directed to a Photo of Me Flipping the Bird
Pilot: And if you have any comments or questions, go ahead and look me up on Facebook.
Vancouver
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Default | Internet | Offers and requests | Pilots | Posted 2008-07-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Smart Travelers Postpone That Recognition As Long As Possible
Pilot over loudspeaker: It's 40 degrees outside and sunny, and we will be landing shortly. Welcome to... Where are we? Oh. Philadelphia! Welcome to Philadelphia!
Flight over Pennsylvania
Overheard by: And he's flying this plane?
Categories: Default | Names | Pennsylvania | Pilots | Plane | Public Transportation | Questions | US Geography | Weather | Posted 2008-06-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Not Technically a Violation of the Restraining Order If She Boards the Plane
Pilot: Before we start our ascent, an important question: Anyone here from the North Allegheny high school class of '68? [silence] I always ask. I'm hoping at some point I'll find my old girlfriend.
JetBlue flight
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Ladle
Categories: Airports & flights | Education | Feelings | Guys | Pennsylvania | Pilots | Questions | Relationships | Wishes | Posted 2008-05-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Stop Masturbating in the Shower -- You're Clogging the Drain.
Pilot to passengers: Welcome to Hawaii! I'm going to tell you all what my mom told me when I turned 18: get your bags and get out.
Direct flight from Seattle, Washington to Oakland, California
Categories: Airports & flights | California | Default | Geography | Memory lane | Offers and requests | Pilots | Posted 2008-03-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Funny 'til Somebody Loses an Aircraft
Pilot to passengers: If you kids don't calm down right now and stop throwing those damn pillows, I will turn this plane around and I will take you back to Mexico!
1999 flight from Cancun to San Francisco, California
Overheard by: the end of senior trip
Categories: California | Default | Geography | Pilots | Threats | Posted 2008-03-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now Everyone Fasten Their Duct Tape -- We're about to Take Off
Pilot: There is no smoking on this aircraft. The penalty for smoking is two thousand dollars. If you had that kind of money, you'd probably be flying United.
Southwest Airlines flight
Overheard by: broke
Categories: Airports & flights | Pilots | Threats | Posted 2008-01-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Forgive Us If We Find Your Relief Unnerving
Pilot over intercom, as plane touches down: ... And the crowd goes wild! Woo-hoo!
Las Vegas, Nevada
Overheard by: errica
Mommy, Why Is the Plane Rearing Up Like That?
Pilot over loudspeaker, while landing plane: Whoa there, big fella!
Delta Airlines flight
Categories: Airports & flights | Pilots | Words | Posted 2007-11-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wait, Wait -- I'm Taking Notes!
Pilot: Sorry for the delay -- we are waiting for the cleaning team. Someone had a problem in the washrooms.
Flight attendant: I'd like to remind everyone that you should poop in the toilet -- not outside of the hole but in the hole. Thank you for your collaboration.
Flight near takeoff
Miami, Florida
Overheard by: Julien
Categories: Advice | Flight attendants | Florida | Pilots | Poop | Posted 2007-10-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Be Ready to Fly the Plane in a Pinch
Pilot: Sit back and relax! We'll be in Indy in about an hour and 55 minutes. [Mic clicks off, then back on.] Uh... We'll be in Boston. You know where you're going.
US Airways flight
Indianapolis to Boston
Overheard by: Anna Mousey
Which They'll Provide in Both the Front and the Tail
Pilot: We'll be flying with our team of flight attendants today, and of course we'll be looking forward to the great service they provide... [Awkward laugh] The great service they provide to you, of course.
American Airlines flight
Overheard by: not that kind of service
Categories: Airports & flights | Jobs & Careers | Pilots | Posted 2007-06-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Confuse Any Terrorists Who May Be Flying with Us Today
Captain: Welcome to JetBlue! I am your captain, Greg, and sitting next to me is your co-captain... also Greg.
Flight to Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Chelsea
