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Translation: "No Big Bang Tonight."
Frumpy Hermionesque girl: Why don't we try to use the formula for finding the location of two galaxies next to one another?
Hipster boy in ironic winter hat: Why would we do that? We're trying to find the age of the universe. You're the worst partner ever.
Frumpy Hermionesque girl: Fuck you, I'm going to find the age of the universe on my own!
Undergraduate Library
University of Michigan
Overheard by: Todd
Admit It-- You're Strangely Aroused.
Pretty hipster in lab: It's cold in here and it's also not hot outside.
Pretty nerd in lab: Shouldn't the thrill of science keep you warm?
Pretty hipster in lab: That's such a stupid thing to say...
Cornell University
Ithaca, New York
Overheard by: Warm for Science
Categories: Dorks, Geeks & Nerds | Hipsters | New York | Questions | Science | Sensory experiences | Stupidity | Posted 2010-12-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Zoinks
Heavily tattooed man: She got this new haircut; it's short, but it's kind of... awkward.
Heavily tattooed woman: Like a bowl cut?
Heavily tattooed man: No, kind of like... What's-his-name, from Scooby Doo.
Heavily tattooed woman: Velma?
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: jira monkey
Categories: Beauty | Hair | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | TV shows | Posted 2010-11-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...They Turned Him Into a Wind Instrument!
Hipster guy to two girls with horrified looks on their faces: So it had been like a zit or a boil when he was seventeen, but because it never got treated... There was, like, a tunnel, and then... (passes out of earshot)
The Danforth
Toronto
Canadia
Overheard by: wondering what the hell came after the tunnel
Categories: Age and ageing | Canadia | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Weirdness | Posted 2010-09-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Could at Least Aquire Some Cheetah Girls.
Fat hipster girl: Do you know we didn't even get to see half the animals?
Skinny hipster guy: Dude, they don't have any sexy animals here.
Smithsonian National Zoo
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Lola Carmichael
Categories: Animals | Fat people | Hipsters | Questions | Sex | Skinny people | Washington, DC | Posted 2010-09-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Plot Of Every Romantic Comedy, in a Nutshell.
Loud hipster on cell, in quiet restaurant: If you went into the jungle, I wouldn't follow you because I don't trust you! (pause) Awesome! Let's hang out.
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: Mrs. Rollins
Categories: Canadia | Hipsters | Offers and requests | On the phone | Relationships | Restaurants | Posted 2010-09-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...In the Soft Porn Industry
Pretty hipster to hipster friend with iPhone: Danny! Stop taking pictures of random girls!
Hipster friend with iPhone: I can't help it, I need them for my work...
Elkhart, Indiana
Categories: Cell phones | Friends | Hipsters | Indiana | Jobs & Careers | Posted 2010-06-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Gives the Same Answer to "Is the Bathroom Clean?"
Customer: Is this a cheese danish?
Hipster barista: It's lemon creme...kind of cheesy, I guess.
Customer: Is it good?
Hipster barista: Kind of... It's subjective.
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Categories: Baristas | Customers | Food | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Sensory experiences | Posted 2010-06-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Don't Know Degradation 'til You Go Into Retail
Scruffy hipster dude on cell: I'm tired of selling sex. I just want to sell jeans... Or something along those lines.
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Clothes | Hipsters | On the phone | Sex | Washington | Wishes | Posted 2010-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Although There's Nothing Worse Than a Goat with the Munchies.
Hipster girl #1: Those are nice (points at earrings), where did you get them?
Hipster girl #2: Oh, I stole these. I only steal earrings, for some reason. So did your parents ever get those goats for their farm?
Hipster girl #1: Not yet, but my mom said they're going to start growing pot.
Hipster girl #2: That's cool.
Cafe
Durham, North Carolina
Overheard by: Vincent Ignatius
Categories: Animals | Bars & Clubs | Compliments | Crimes | Drugs | Family ties | Fashion | Hipsters | North Carolina | Weirdness | Posted 2010-05-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Felt Like I Was in an Episode Of Sliders
Hip girl to friend: So I went to this Vietnamese restaurant and apparently it's run by Chinese people. Can they even do that?
Sydney
Australia
The Jigsaw Killer from Saw Sings "Blue Suede Shoes"
20-something hipster guy: There was the big drill for the alcoholic... Then they busted out the small drill and it was like... woah!
Coffee Shop
Colorado Springs, Colorado
Overheard by: Vanessa
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Colorado | Drinking & drunks | Hipsters | Weirdness | Posted 2010-02-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Until Dinner, Though.
Wannabe hipster girl: I'm anorexic!
Wannabe hipster friend: No way!
Wannabe hipster girl: No, seriously! I'm anorexic since lunch.
Wannabe hipster friend: Okay.
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: the actual hipsters were way more polite
Categories: Food | Friends | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Overheard in Minneapolis | Stupidity | Posted 2010-01-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kindly Accept This Sperm As a Token Of My Sincerity
Art school hipster girl, in the middle of different conversation: Oh my god! I got my goddamned hair cut yesterday!
Art school hipster guy: I was gonna say in the car!
(art school hipster girl smiles with crazy eyes and mouth agape)
Art school hipster guy: No, seriously... It is so fresh.
Savannah, Georgia
Categories: Compliments | Georgia | Hair | Hipsters | Students | Posted 2009-12-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
She's Canadian.
Hipster girl: Oh, look, there's a movie theata here too!
Hipster guy: Movie "theata"? Wow, you do have an accent... but your sister, she's really got an accent!
Hipster girl: Actually, she has a speech impediment.
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Compare and contrast | Family ties | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Language barrier | Massachusetts | Words | Posted 2009-11-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just Start Blowing Things and See What Comes Out
Hipster guy: I can't tell if I'm horny or it's just my sinus infection again...
UBC
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Colleges & Universities | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Maladies | Sex | Posted 2009-10-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, That's What You Said About Anal.
Worldly hipster: Do you drink?
Very naive girl: No, tried it once, didn't like the taste.
Worldly hipster: Do you like tea?
Very naive girl: Yes.
Worldly hipster: Good, then you'll like beer.
Columbus, Ohio
Overheard by: The RJP
Categories: Compare and contrast | Drinking & drunks | Food | Girls | Hipsters | Ohio | Questions | Sensory experiences | Posted 2009-10-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like His Penis, Once.
Creepy, vacant-eyed hipster, apropos of nothing: Jesus loves you. He made you. He shows me things.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Jen
Categories: Creepsters | Hipsters | Jesus | Overheard in PDX | Religious fanatics | Weirdness | Posted 2009-10-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Only Have Room in My Heart for Bacon
Hipster in "Vatican Chainsaw Massacre" t-shirt: And the thing is, dude, I just... (sighs) ...I just don't really care about waffles, you know?
Queen Street West
Toronto
Canadia
Oh, Ally McBeal, How We've Missed You!
Hipster girl to another: I consider myself single, except for the part where I have a boyfriend... so I can't cheat on him.
St. Louis, Missouri
Categories: Hipsters | Missouri | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2009-09-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Some DEA Plants Don't Even Try.
Hipster to another, after cigarette drag: So what do you think about heroin?
Gainesville, Florida
Overheard by: PJ
I Can Finally See Things Clearly.
Hipster guy: Are you going to bed?
Hipster girl: No. I just don't know man. I feel like my head is full of Saran wrap.
Virginia Tech
Blacksburg, Virginia
Categories: Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Questions | Sensory experiences | Virginia | Posted 2009-09-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thanks, President Obama!
White hipster to others: I've noticed the black kids in Harlem are starting to wear skinny jeans and skateboard. It's great... 'cause it's, like, cool to be smart again.
Massachussetts
But Not Nearly As Cocky
Hipster, looking at Dr J mural: Man, he must have a three-foot dick. I bet his dick is as big as Allen Iverson.
Shout-out: overheardinphilly.blogspot.com
Overheard by: anonymous
Categories: About celebrities | Compare and contrast | Hipsters | Overheard in Philly | Penis | Posted 2009-08-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Sad About Getting Caught
20-something hipster chick: I cried throughout the whole movie. Seriously, I was bawling! Richard Nixon was such a sad man.
Tick Tock Diner
Passiac, New Jersey
Overheard by: JoBell
Categories: Chicks | Feelings | Hipsters | Movies | New Jersey | Politics | Restaurants | Posted 2009-08-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just As a Conversation Piece, Y'know?
Hipster: You're buying an Ethiopian? I did that once.
Baltimore, Maryland
Overheard by: Tickle Feet
The Whole Thing Smacks Of Effort
Hipster chick to hipster dude: If you could do any profession, what would you do? Like, if you gave your whole self to something?
Hipster dude: I don't know.
Hipster girl: I would be a tree surgeon.
Hipster dude: What's that?
Hipster girl: Like, it's an environmental way to trim trees. I would go around climbing trees all day and snipping them, and like, live in the forest. But I probably won't do that.
Hipster dude: Oh.
Chapel Hill, North Carolina
Categories: Hipsters | Jobs & Careers | North Carolina | Questions | Stupidity | Wishes | Posted 2009-07-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Like the Miracle Of Hanukah!
Ultra-skinny hipster chick: I've been eating the same quiche for weeks.
Portland, Maine
Overheard by: Koch
Categories: Chicks | Diet & weight | Food | Hipsters | Maine | Skinny people | Posted 2009-07-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...You Wanna Go to Build-a-Bear?
Roid Rager, angrily: Nobody gives me the finger while I'm driving!
Hipster, calmly: Well, you need to slow down. It's a parking lot.
Roid Rager, enraged: You wanna do something about it?
Hipster: No. I'm not gonna fight you in front of Sears.
Rockaway Mall, New Jersey
Overheard by: Joe Bagodonuts
...Now Walk Like an Egyptian
Cop, over cruiser speaker, to lethargic group of hipsters: Go ahead...walk.
(hipsters saunter across street)
Cop, still on speaker: Good job.
Davis Square
Somerville, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kaitlin
Categories: Compliments | Cops | Hipsters | Massachusetts | Weirdness | Posted 2009-07-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Somebody's Husband Wasn't Properly Fed and Watered
Hipster girl to friend: I heard the most offensive thing in Crate & Barrel!
San Francisco, California
Categories: Compare and contrast | Default | Girls | Hipsters | Names | San Francisco | Sensory experiences | Posted 2009-06-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Opposed to Those Infuriating Sign Language Songs
Hipster to friends: They have really cool songs, 'cause you can, like, listen to them.
Hipster friends: (nod and mutter in agreement)
Corner Brook
Newfoundland
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compare and contrast | Default | Hipsters | Music | Sensory experiences | Posted 2009-05-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And When I Moved They Followed Me, Like Eyes
Hipster to boyfriend: There are certain places that you expect a woman's nipples to be, and hers were not in any of those places.
Cedar Rapids, Iowa
I'm All A-Tingle in My Bad Places.
Young hipster guy to another: You're so pretty when you're pretty!
Honolulu, Hawaii
Overheard by: Iwalei
But I Still Love The View
Petite, hip girl: Honestly, it's not that controversial.
Drama club kid: Yeah, it's just a woman saying "vagina."
Connecticut
Overheard by: ernaynay
Categories: Compare and contrast | Connecticut | Default | Girls | Hipsters | Kids | Vagina | Words | Posted 2009-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It Defines Me.
Hobo to hipster: Is a BlackBerry a cell phone?
Hipster: Yeah, but I don't have one.
Hobo: I like blackberry pie!
Los Angeles, California
Categories: California | Cell phones | Compare and contrast | Default | Fruit | Hipsters | Hobos | Questions | Posted 2009-05-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
After a Long Winter, the Root Cellar's Empty
20-something hipster to friend: So...I'm officially out of corpses.
Friend: Dude!
Portland, Maine
Categories: Compare and contrast | Death & dying | Default | Friends | Hipsters | Maine | Weirdness | Posted 2009-04-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Not As Much As Hanson, But Significantly.
20-something fashionista: Oh, the Spice Girls like totally changed my life!
Beverly Center
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Shabunapoodle
Categories: California | Compare and contrast | Default | Hipsters | Music | Names | Pop culture | Posted 2009-04-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Get That Hannah Montana Ringtone I've Been Wanting
Hipster boy: So, are you doing that post-bac pre-med thing?
Hipster girl: I dunno...I don't really know what I wanna do.
Hipster boy: Really, you don't wanna do medicine anymore?
Hipster girl: I dunno, I wish I could like, win the lottery. Then I'd go to like, Ghana, and just save people.
NYU Elevator
Categories: Default | Girls | Guys | Hipsters | Jobs & Careers | Money | New York | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Wishes | Posted 2009-04-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Don't Get Enough Fiber in Our Diets, Anyway
Hipster guy: Hey guys, this shirt's 100% organic. This shirt's made outta food! (quiet pause)
Hipster guy's friend: That is like, amazing.
Clothing Boutique
British Columbia
Canadia
Overheard by: Lauren.
Molly Ringwald Was the Mandy Moore Of Her Day
Hipster girl to friend, looking at DVDs: Hey, you know my friend Stephanie, whose boyfriend I made out with, Corey? His favorite movie was A Walk to Remember. He admitted it and everything.
Hipster friend, touching hipster friend's head: You have a really soft scalp.
Hipster girl: That means I'll never lose my hair. Oh! The Breakfast Club!
Edgewood Target
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: I didn't make out with him
Categories: Body parts | Default | Friends | Georgia | Girls | Hair | Hipsters | Movies | Questions | Relationships | Posted 2009-04-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Kids Raised on Sesame Street Often Have That Reaction
(bible thumper holding cross is passing out pamphlets on the street)
Hipster guy, yelling: Yeah! Lower case 't'!
Royal Oak, Michigan
Overheard by: Sara
She's Old-Fashioned That Way
Male hipster to another: So, I was jerking off into this vagina...
Gastown
Vancouver
Canadia
Overheard by: DagnyTaggart
Categories: Canadia | Default | Guys | Hipsters | Masturbation | Memory lane | Vagina | Weirdness | Posted 2009-03-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Maybe If You Were Close to Being a Rich Man
Hipster kid #1: Kelsey, have you ever seen Fiddler on the Roof?
Hipster kid #2: No. I'm not a fan of Tennessee Williams.
Hipster kid #3: Um, I think you're thinking of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.
Hipster kid #2: Yeah, whatever. I was close.
Missouri Botanical Gardens
St. Louis, Missouri
Overheard by: tennessee williams' groupie
Back Up-- There Are Jews in Nebraska?
Hip daughter: Mom, is that the same guy?
Hip mom: No.
Hip daughter: Then why do they sound the exact same?
Hip mom: Because they're Jewish.
Hip daughter: Really?
Hip mom: No.
Hip daughter (laughing): Oh my god! Mom! That's...
Hip mom: Don't quote me on Facebook.
Lincoln, Nebraska
Overheard by: robert taylor
Clearly, You Are No Donna Reed
Hipster guy: I cried so much when I watched it.
Hipster girl: It's a Wonderful Life made you cry? Ha!
Hipster guy: Shhhh! (looks around furtively)
Wellington
New Zealand
Hand Her a Magic Feather and She Can Fly, Though
Hipster girl to friend: Yeah, we were going to go to a bar last night, but, you know, Beth has awkward ears.
Orlando, Florida
Overheard by: Normal Ears?
Categories: Body parts | Default | Drinking & drunks | Florida | Girls | Hipsters | Weirdness | Posted 2009-02-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I May Have Fugeed Myself
Excited hipster guy on cell: Dude, you just missed Wyclef Jean! He was fucking awesome! He dry-humped me and everything!
Voodoo Music Fest
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Eliza
The Secret To Salma Hayek's Success
Hipster girl: I don't know, she just smells amazing. Her entire face smells like corn tortilla!
American Apparel
San Francisco, California
Categories: Body parts | Compliments | Default | Food | Girls | Hipsters | San Francisco | Stores | Posted 2009-01-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Takes a Man Years to Forgive Himself for Saying Such Things
Too hip 20-something: But you have to also create an environment where epic things can transpire...
Walzwerk Restaurant
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: glamour-geek
Categories: Compliments | Default | Hipsters | Restaurants | San Francisco | Weirdness | Words | Posted 2009-01-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Was an Art History Major
Pre-hipster eyeing Harvard t-shirt: What do you mean you can't afford it? But you graduated from there. Isn't that the whole point of going there?
Prudential Mall
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by:
Along With "Old Too Soon" and "Smart Too Late"
Decked-out tarot card reader, eyes closed, acting all mystical: I'm getting the feeling of a friend, a female presence that seems to be around you quite often. I get this feeling, this strong feeling, that she tries to help you in certain ways but her help isn't the good kind. For some reason, a phrase keeps popping in my head. This one phrase.
Drunk seated hipster girl: What is it?
Tarot card reader: The words (dramatic pause) "party too hard."
Alcove Gallery
Atlanta, Georgia
Categories: Body parts | Counselors | Default | Drunks | Feelings | Georgia | Girls | Hipsters | Questions | Posted 2009-01-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Worst. Prostitute. Ever
Serious hipster chick #1: So she shot him in the leg, because that was her training.
Serious hipster chick #2 (nodding understandingly): Uh-huh.
Serious hipster chick #1: And then they ended up lying feet to feet.
Art Opening
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Terry B
...And I Knew I Was in Love
Hipster on cell: And then she started talking about trouser gravy...
Mesa College
San Diego, California
Overheard by: Tish
Categories: California | Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Cum | Default | Hipsters | On the phone | Words | Posted 2008-12-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Does Your First Job Feel Like, Alex?
Hipster girl to friend (laughing): I was gagging, and then it was all over my neck.
Queen West
Toronto
Canadia
But, in the End, He Let Us Both Graduate
Hipster girl to guy: I got lucky. All I had to do was make out with him. (motions to other hipster girl standing beside them) She had to suck him off!
Atlanta, Georgia
Categories: BJs | Compare and contrast | Default | Georgia | Girls | Hipsters | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Posted 2008-10-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Got High Enough to Develop Altitude Sickness
Hipster chick #1: Yeah, we did opium last night.
Hipster chick #2: How was that?
Hipster chick #1: I vomited until my ears popped.
Hipster chick #2: Awesome!
Blue Line
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: Eve
Categories: Default | Drugs | Girls | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Illinois | Public transportation | Questions | Posted 2008-09-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
All the Other Times I Didn't Need the Vodka
Hipster girl: I wasn't invited to the wedding but maybe I'll go anyway. I could be your date. Who knows, maybe you'll even score.
Guy: Shit, all I have to do is give you two vodka sodas and point you to a pool and I'll score. Easy.
Hipster girl: One time that happened. One time.
Marta Train
Atlanta, Georgia
Categories: Default | Drinking & drunks | Georgia | Girls | Guys | Hipsters | Relationships | Sexuality | Train | Posted 2008-09-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Same Reason So Many People Apply to Haverford.
Hipster girl #1: I got into Northeastern for grad school. I dunno what to do.
Hipster girl #2: Wow, that's really good! What a great school. Northwestern is like, famous.
Hipster girl #1: No, Northeastern.
Hipster girl #2: Oh. Is that a good school?
Hipster girl #1: Not really. But I figured if I put it small on my resume or say it fast, people will get confused. It clearly works!
30 Bus
San Francisco, California
Categories: Bus | Default | Education | Girls | Hipsters | Memory lane | San Francisco | Words | Posted 2008-08-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Dear Diary--Made a New Friend Today!
Hipster: So my girlfriend was sketching me naked when I went home. So I was sitting there, you know... naked. And then her parents walked in.
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Body parts | Default | Family ties | Hipsters | Massachusetts | Relationships | Posted 2008-08-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Breast Display Units
Manly hipster #1: She's been really into these half sweater type things lately.
Manly hipster #2: Yeah, they're called "shrugs".
TOAD
Cambridge, Massachusetts
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Clothes | Default | Hipsters | Massachusetts | Words | Posted 2008-08-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"Thank You, Brother Fish, for Feeding Me," I Said
Hipster to buddies: Look, all I'm saying is, that fish made me feel so special.
Stumptown Coffee
Portland, Oregon
Overheard by: Addison
Barkeep, Another Hot Toddy for My Toddler!
Hipster girl: I know a couple people who have to wear diapers when they drink!
Old Tavern Bar & Grill
Sacramento, California
Overheard by: kat
Categories: Bars & Clubs | California | Drinking & drunks | Hipsters | Pee | Restaurants | Posted 2008-08-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And She Totally Fled the Trade Towers on 9/11
Drunk hipster girl: Let's drunk dial Cameron!
Drunker hipster guy: I hate Cameron!
Drunkest hipster guy: You know what my biggest problem with Cameron is? She wasn't in New Orleans during hurricane Katrina.
Hollywood Bowl
Los Angeles, California
Overheard by: Chantily
Categories: California | Drunks | Guys | Hipsters | Insults | Offers and requests | Tourist attractions | Wishes | Posted 2008-08-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'll Bet You Say That to All the Girls
(outside of a coffee shop downtown late at night)
Hipster chick: So then I went to the store and found out the shoes were discontinued but...
Creepy guy (with unzipped and unbuttoned pants): What are you guys talking about? Can I talk or are you going to kick me out?
Hipster chick: Uh... (looks around for a quick exit) No man, you can stay. We're talking about shoes.
Creepy guy: You're so hot. No, really. I would kiss you like you'd never think about shoes again.
Akron, Ohio
Overheard by: Julia M
Categories: Clothes | Compliments | Creepsters | Default | Etiquette | Hipsters | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Kink | Ohio | Strangers | Weirdness | Posted 2008-07-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You'll Need a Mental Enema First
Hipster college dude: You mean you had anal?
Hipster college chick: Well, more like mental anal.
Hipster college dude: Mental anal. Hmmm, let me think on that a spell.
UNM Campus
Albuquerque, New Mexico
Overheard by: klutch
Categories: Backdoor | Chicks | Colleges & Universities | Default | Friends | Guys | Hipsters | New Mexico | Questions | Posted 2008-07-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
With the Same Impure Love You Have for Hello Kitty
Hipster guy, earnestly: Yeah, you'll love her; her face is really funny!
16th & Market
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Body parts | Compliments | Default | Guys | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Words | Posted 2008-06-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Olive Oyl's Been Dating Popeye for a Long Time
Hipster chick: I am who I am and that's what I like about me, but it keeps getting me into these shitty situations.
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Bragging | Compare and contrast | Default | Feelings | Girls | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Pride | Posted 2008-06-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Childbirth Is All a Hoax
20-something hipster girl to another: So, anyway, no one is pregnant.
Sorella's Diner
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Julianna
Categories: Default | Fears | Friends | Girls | Hipsters | Massachusetts | Pregnancy | Restaurants | Words | Posted 2008-05-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Thanks for Letting Me Into Yale
Hipster guy: Yeah, it probably didn't help that I gave you poison ivy and then threw up on you.
Bar
Columbia, Missouri
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Default | Etiquette | Guys | Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | Maladies | Missouri | Relationships | Weirdness | Posted 2008-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A+
Male art student in response to female art student's sculpture: It's really kind of mortifyingly vaginal.
Allegheny College
Meadville Pennsylvania
Categories: Class | Compare and contrast | Etiquette | Euphemisms | Feelings | Guys | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Students | Vagina | Words | Posted 2008-04-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
He Doesn't Go Very Far In
Young fashionista #1: How do you stay so positive?
Young fashionista #2: Oh, you know, I just don't let the bad stuff in.
Young fashionista #1: What about Pedro?
São Paulo
Brazil
Overheard by: paparazzi
Categories: Brazil | Comebacks | Default | Hipsters | Office politics | Philosophy | Sex | Zombies | Posted 2008-03-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
There's Nothing You Can Do to Rehabilitate Its Coolness
Hipster girl pointing at piece of art: So, do you want to get it?
Hipster guy: Nah, we'll get it somewhere else. I hate when people ask you, 'Where did you get that?' and you're like, 'Ikea...'
Ikea
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
The True Test of Whether You Should Be Wearing Skinny Jeans
Hipster girl: Ugh, I had, like, the worst day yesterday. I was skipping on the quad, and I ripped my skinny jeans.
Vassar College
Poughkeepsie, New York
Don't Crazy Canadians Just Become U.S. Citizens?
Hipster chick: Did I ever tell you about my childhood Princess Leia obsession?
Hipster dude: No, you never told me about a Princess Leia thing. Oh, wait, maybe you did. Did it involve pastries on your head to simulate hair buns?
Hipster chick: No, that must have been another girlfriend.
Hipster dude: No! Or maybe the pastry buns was me. I repress so many memories.
Hipster chick: Probably smart.
Hipster dude: It's working okay so far.
Hipster chick: Yeah. You barely need therapy.
15th Avenue SW
Calgary, Alberta
Canadia
Categories: Canadia | Compliments | Couples | Default | Hipsters | Memory lane | TV shows | Posted 2008-03-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Challenge You to Come Up with a Better Description
Brunette hipster: Who's Mario Batali?
Blonde hipster: You know, that red-haired chef that looks like he'd smell like ass.
Brunette hipster: Oh, okay. Yeah. Totally.
Toi
Los Angeles, California
Categories: About celebrities | California | Default | Girls | Gripes | Hipsters | Questions | Posted 2008-02-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Who Isn't Discussing the iPhone These Days?
Hipster boy: I mean, yeah, I'd buy it, but I would not have sex with it. I wouldn't fuck it. I'd just buy it.
Oberlin, Ohio
On a Good Day, She's You-Don't-Have-to-Be-Drunk-Pretty
Hipster on cell: She's not ugly, she's just not leave-your-girlfriend-pretty.
McDonald's
Morristown, New Jersey
Categories: Beauty | Gossip | Hipsters | New Jersey | Posted 2008-02-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Mean, Does That Line Ever Work?
Naked old man: You know, they say you really shouldn't hang meats anymore.
Fully-clothed hipster: ... Really?
YMCA locker room
Chicago, Illinois
We Were Supposed to Do That Together
Teen hipster on cell: Mom... Mom! I still have the 10 bucks. I did not spend it on drugs... I did not spend it on drugs!
Capitol Hill
Seattle, Washington
Overheard by: mightbekatrina
Categories: Drugs | Hipsters | Money | Washington | Posted 2008-02-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That, and When Oprah Appeared to Me in a Popsicle
Cracked-out homeless he-she to girl running from station: Keep on running, mothafuckah! I'll getcha! [Crazy laughter.]
Hipster girl, after he-she walks away: That was the greatest thing that ever happened to me.
30th Street station
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: 3 Hipsters
Categories: Hipsters | Homeless | Pennsylvania | Threats | Posted 2008-01-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What's the Word for Ironic Irony?
Young hipster dude to older hipster dude: Man, fuck Yanni. That guy sucks. [Mocks his singing] 'The best part of waking up...' Wait, no, that's Michael Bolton. Wait, no, that's Folgers!
Blue line Metro
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Laughing at that guy
Categories: Hipsters | Music | Washington, DC | Posted 2008-01-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Twin Cities Get Ready for Winter
Hipster guy to chick: You know, if you drink a lot of Tabasco, your shit will really burn... No, I don't mean it will hurt. I mean you can light it on fire and it will keep you warm when it's cold out.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: hungry muppet
Categories: Food | Gossip | Hipsters | Overheard in Minneapolis | Posted 2008-01-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Do You Think I Would Fail His Class?
Asian hipster: People stare at him, and he resents them for staring at him. But I'm like, 'Maybe you should bathe!'
Jewish hipster: You should give him an elephant tranquilizer or something.
Shout-out: overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Glowien
Categories: Advice | Cleanliness | Hipsters | Overheard in the Valley | Posted 2008-01-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Topic Was "Careers for Youth"
Hipster girl: Haha, that presentation we did in class was kinda strange...
Dude: Yeah, I know, but I just had to say 'porn.'
Dalseweg
Nijmegen
Holland
Categories: Hipsters | Netherlands | Words | Posted 2007-12-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just because He Likes His Pork Pulled?
Hipster girl: He eats pork, but he won't eat pussy. He's a really bad Jew.
Ponce de Leon Avenue
Atlanta, Georgia
Overheard by: I'm a vegetarian
Well the Eye Shadow Would Look Silly without It
Hipster girl: Why won't you take my last name when we get married? It would be really progressive of you...
Hipster guy: No, it wouldn't! It would be emasculating!
Hipster girl: Emasculating? Like how?
Hipster guy: Like me wearing a dress...
Hipster girl: But you already do that!
IKEA
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Gripes | Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Posted 2007-12-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Contemplating a Few Craft Projects of My Own
Scottish hipster: So, we find him tied to this pole near the railway tracks, stripped and covered with tar.
English hipster: Tar? So, is that easy to get around here?
The Lot
Edinburgh
Scotland
But I'm Too Baked to Know for Sure
Hipster: I mean, come on, get with it. This is the '90s, man.
Friend: ... I don't think it is.
Rutgers University
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Categories: Hipsters | New Jersey | Stupidity | Posted 2007-11-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Unless It Happens to Someone Else
Hipster: Anal leakage is never funny.
Charleston, South Carolina
Overheard by: Katie
Categories: Health & Hygiene | Hipsters | South Carolina | Posted 2007-11-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Are You Suggesting a Cause-and-Effect Relationship?
Hipster chick to friends: Speaking of pregnancy, who wants pizza?
Denver Art Museum
Colorado
The Piranha Were Disappointed
Hipster chick: ... So then his mom said, 'Get your cock out of the fish tank!'
Gabrielino High School
San Gabriel, California
Overheard by: Alexia
Categories: California | Gossip | Hipsters | Posted 2007-10-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Terrible Wig-Hair
Smug male hipster law student: I don't do gender-bending anymore -- it almost always leads to bar fights.
Washington College of Law
Washington, DC
Overheard by: If it weren't for my horse...
Categories: Gender issues | Hipsters | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-10-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And She Wasn't a Chick
Stoner: Yo, that chick was kind of hot. She was starin' at me.
Hipster: She wasn't hot, and she was staring at you because you were in her way.
Stoner: I like it my way better.
Millersville University
Millersville, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Steveo
Categories: Hipsters | Pennsylvania | Stoners | Stupidity | Posted 2007-10-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If There's Two Things That Belong Apart, It's Drinking and Nailguns
Hipster girl to boyfriend: Tanya is either wasted or at the Home Depot -- there's no in-between.
Beacon Hill
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Michael
Categories: Gossip | Hipsters | Massachusetts | Posted 2007-09-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Stood in Front of One Urinal and Peed in Another
Disheveled hipster: His dick was so crooked that it had, like, a knuckle!
Calgary
Canadia
Overheard by: Mrs The Experience
Decided Her True Love Was Air Traffic Control
Hipster: Yeah, well, at least she stopped huffing paint.
Shout-out: overheardinphilly.blogspot.com
Overheard by: anonymous
Categories: Drugs | Hipsters | Overheard in Philly | Posted 2007-08-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Can I Get a Swig?
Hobo: Girl, I know you're a freak! All redheads are freaks!
Brunette hipster pumping gas: Step off. What I do is none of your business.
Hobo: Lady, I'm just talking shit 'cause I'm drunk.
Brunette hipster: Me, too.
Kansas City, Missouri
Overheard by: cuspy
Categories: Drinking & drunks | Hipsters | Hobos | Missouri | Posted 2007-07-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Will Accept That As a Promissory Note
Hipster girl: Don't you dare lick me!
Hipster boy: [Licks her.]
Hipster girl: I love you.
Minneapolis, Minnesota
Best Tofu, Though
Whiny girl: Oh my god, that chicken is terrible!
Hipster chick: That's because it's tofu.
Whiny girl: Yeah, worst chicken ever.
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: sarafist
Categories: Food | Hipsters | Overheard in PDX | Posted 2007-07-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Although It's a Part of My Life I Don't Like Talking About
Hipster on cell: I've been everywhere. [pause] Yes, I've been to Queens.
Hope Street, Williamsburg
Brooklyn, New York
Categories: Hipsters | New York | North America | On the phone | USA | Posted 2007-06-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What You Never Knew about the Last Supper
Hipster chick: You know, you can tell it's a good party by how many people get their stomachs pumped, and whether or not Mark gets naked.
Friend: Totally.
Starbucks
Virginia
Categories: Hipsters | Philosophy | Virginia | Posted 2007-05-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Daniel Radcliffe: It Was Lipstick, Actually
Lady suit: I hate to say it, but Harry Potter's penis is small.
Hipster girl: What! Nooo!
Lady suit: No, really -- it is. He got an erection on stage... and it was just sad. But the weirdest part is that it was bright red, like they had put blush on it or something.
Hipster girl: What the fuck?! My dreams are ruined!
Shout-out: overheardinthevalley.blogspot.com
Categories: About celebrities | Hipsters | Overheard in the Valley | Penis | Suits | Posted 2007-05-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But You Can Hold It Over the Kid for Life
Pregnant, tattooed hipster: This is killing me. How can I go without ink for nine months?
Tattooed hipster friend: Oh, I know.
Nevada
What Eminem Really Has against Moby
Hipster, gesturing: ... And his flaccid dick was as big as my forearm!
Olive Street overpass
Seattle, Washington
Categories: Gossip | Hipsters | Penis | Washington | Posted 2007-04-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Breathing Is So '90s
Hipster: I want to start spitting, so I've decided to take up smoking.
Canadia
