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Those Were Different Times--There Was a War On
College girl #1: If I'm pregnant, the father is either him or his cousin.
College girl #2: Wait, you slept with David* and his cousin?
College girl #1: It wasn't a big deal, it was a threesome!
Barnes & Noble
Cary, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jennifer
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Family ties | Friends | North Carolina | Pregnancy | Sex | Sorority types | Stores | Weirdness | Posted 2008-06-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Everything She Knows About Homosexuality She Learned from Bravo TV
Bimbette: What's wrong with gay people? Gay people are funny.
Religion Class
El Paso, Texas
Categories: Bimbettes | Compliments | Default | Feelings | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Texas | Posted 2008-06-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
For Instance, If the State Wants to Mix Stripes and Plaids
Bimbette government teacher, explaining checks and balances: So then, like, the national government says to the state government, "Um, you can't do that, you little... like, state."
Canton, Michigan
Turns Out Hell Is Nicer Than Michigan
Bimbette on cell: I thought I'd died, and then gone to, like, not heaven.
University of Michigan
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Death & dying | Default | Fears | Michigan | On the phone | Religion | Posted 2008-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Good Point --No Effect on Religious Beliefs
Professor: Now, if we did eliminate illness and achieved immortality there might be serious religious repercussions. Can anyone think of how this might affect religious beliefs?
Bimbette: Well, like, if Hitler were immortal, he would, like, go to jail for, like, a million years and then, like, chill out for eternity, you know?
Eternal Youth and Immortality Seminar
Lafayette College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: knows that Hitler would still be dead because he SHOT himself
Categories: Bimbettes | Class | Compare and contrast | Crimes | Education | History | Pennsylvania | Philosophy | Questions | Religion | Stupidity | Teachers | Posted 2008-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Carlos Beltran: I Hate Being an Outfielder
Female Mets fan: I'd let the whole infield fuck me in the ass with no lube if it meant they would win the World Series.
Friend: Classy, Michelle, real classy.
Braves-Mets Game
Queens, New York
Overheard by: aaron
2008: Microsoft Pilots MS Office Assistant, "Buzzy the Dildo"
Guy: You know when you do a "Find File" in Windows? Yeah. I want to kill the little animated dog... It bothers me.
Girl: Hahaha... Yeah. It's better than the paperclip.
Guy: Meh... Only because he doesn't pop up unexpectedly. Clippy was kind of cool if he weren't in the way.
Girl: Thats what he wants you to think! He makes you feel bad for hating him!
Guy: Why this makes me want to have an animated kitten running around my desktop, I don't know. I used to have such a program.
Girl: I had a stripper on my laptop. She danced and stripped whenever music came on.
Guy: You're such a closet nympho.
Girl: Yeah. For my dreams class, we have to write all our dreams down and share them with the class. Last night I dreamt I was trekking through a jungle in gold prada heels to find my doctor to get an HIV test. I'm not sure I want the class psychoanalyzing that one.
Portland, Maine
Guy: Come Back! I Can Change It!
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair...
Girl #2: Yeah, it's the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick...
East Lansing, Michigan
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Etiquette | Friends | Gender issues | Girls | Infidelity | Michigan | Penis | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Soon As We Get On, I'm Grabbing a Pole and Ripping Them Off
Chick: Well, my mom wouldn't let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.
Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado
Categories: Bimbettes | Chicks | Clothes | Colorado | Family ties | Gender issues | Gripes | Public Transportation | Teens | Posted 2008-04-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And You're Hoochie-Skipper.
20-something in pink heels, on a Saturday afternoon: God, I'm like frickin walk of shame Barbie right now.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Eavesdrop DC | Fashion | Feelings | Toys | Posted 2008-04-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
At Least Take a Bite of This Apple
Boy: I believe in waiting until marriage.
Girl: That's funny, cause I believe in you fucking my brains out.
Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | Colleges & Universities | Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Etiquette | Girls | Guys | Pennsylvania | Relationships | Religion | Religious fanatics | Sex | Students | Wishes | Yeahhh, college! | Posted 2008-04-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Have the Hairbrushes, Right?
Girl, wearing leather pants and high heels, pushing a cart containing D batteries, duct tape, and huge bag of rice, on cell: I don't know why he's so smug, I told him what I would do to him if I caught him again. [pause] Okay, well I've almost got everything I need, I'll be right over.
Wal-Mart
Lufkin, Texas
Overheard by: wtf?
Categories: Bimbettes | Girls | On the phone | Relationships | Shopping | Stores | Texas | Threats | Posted 2008-04-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Storytelling Is a Lost Art
Drunk bimbette: Oh my god! I used to like this ugly guy once... Then I realized he was ugly and stopped liking him.
Barbeque
Jundiaí
Brazil
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | Brazil | Compare and contrast | Drunks | Feelings | Restaurants | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As I Have Noticed Your Lack of Training Wheels
Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn't fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
As My Plaques and Trophies Will Attest
Dude carrying Subway sandwich: My ass? No, I wouldn't expect a girl to be looking at my ass.
Chick carrying Subway sandwich: Oh yeah. Women will look at your ass. But they can't check out the other thing.
Dude: Well, under certain circumstances . . .
Chick: No, there's nothing equivalent. There's no cleavage shot.
Dude: A girl slapped my ass at the gym the other day.
Chick: Oh yeah. That's right. I have slapped lots of asses.
Howard and New Montgomery
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Cleavage Shots All Around!
Categories: Ass | Bimbettes | Chicks | Default | Euphemisms | Friends | Gender issues | Guys | Penis | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Apparently That's Not How Job Interviews Work
Girl walking to bus stop drunk: I just wanted to walk in, get groped and leave.
Pheasant Run
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Brandon Call
And You Can Only Show the Video to a Limited Audience
Girl #1: At least he didn't say what JD said to me the other night. He said I was boring in the bedroom because I didn't try new things.
Girl #2: Oh my god!
Girl #1: Yeah and I told him, well how am I supposed to know what to do? I was a virgin before you. Well, not literally a virgin, but close enough!
Girl #2: So what are you going to do?
Girl #1: Well, I told him that when we go on vacation, we can have a threesome. But it has to be someone I'll never see again.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Slutgers Girl
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Friends | Girls | Gripes | New Jersey | Offers and requests | Relationships | Sex | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Pickings Seem to Be Slim in Iowa
College girl #1: So I met up with Jeremy last night.
College girl #2: Ah, the one with the small penis. Wait... No, Adam has the small dick. Jeremy's the bad kisser, right?
College girl #1: To be fair, they're both bad kissers. But yeah, Adam's the one with the small dick.
Coffee shop
Iowa City, Iowa
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bimbettes | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Default | Friends | Gossip | Iowa | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Penis | Sexuality | Students | Posted 2008-04-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Penis Doesn't Care What You Think
Blonde: ... And then there was, like, this penis all up in my face, and I was like, 'But I thought you were a girl...'
Montclair State University
New Jersey
Overheard by: Anna
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | New Jersey | Penis | Sexuality | Posted 2008-03-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like Richard Simmons
Bimbette #1: Wait, is a bird a mammal? I don't think it's a mammal...
Bimbette #2: I think a bird is, like, its own species.
B train
Boston, Massachusetts
His G-String with the Elephant Head on It Was a Bit of a Shock, Though
Summer fun Barbie #1: I mean, like, I wasn't even surprised that you went home with him!
Summer fun Barbie #2: Do you mean that I had sex with him?
Summer fun Barbie #1: Yeah.
Summer fun Barbie #2: Yeah, me neither.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: also not surprised
Seriously, Curling Is the Most Retarded Sport Ever
Brunette #1, breaking silence: I hate brooms.
Brunette #2: Me, too.
Rest of group: ... What?!
Cactus Club, Yaletown
Vancouver, British Columbia
Canadia
Categories: Bimbettes | Canadia | Default | Gripes | Health & Hygiene | Posted 2008-03-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Couldn't We Just Discriminate Against People Wearing Explosive Clothing?
Bimbette: Well, discriminating against the Muslims is different than against, like, the Russians for Hitler and everything.
Archbishop Spalding High School
Severn, Maryland
Overheard by: Wait, is she kidding?
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Default | Geography | History | Maryland | Politics | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What's Next -- Shopping at Hot Topic?
Blonde to another: I can't believe you're not tanning today! You disgust me!
California Polytechnic University
Pomona, California
Overheard by: Quiet Student
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gripes | Posted 2008-03-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How'd Professor Walsh Even Get My Number?
Blonde: So, he calls me drunk at two o'clock in the morning and tells me our relationship has barnacles.
Brunette: What?!
Blonde: He compared our relationship to ship that has barnacles on it!
Brunette: Um...
Blonde: So now I'm like, 'Should I read into this?'
Psych building, Washington University
St. Louis, Missouri
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Missouri | Relationships | Students | Posted 2008-03-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What If Your Husband Finds Out?
Girl to pals in line for restroom: ... So now I'm dating my boss, my landlord, and financial advisor...
Friend: Wow, that's intense.
DeVos Performance Hall
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Caty
I Catalog Them by Penis Size and Strange Bodily Features
Redhead: You seriously don't know where Bruce Willis was born?
Brunette: No.
Redhead: I can tell you where half the actors I'm in love with were born.
Brunette: Honey, I can't even tell you where half the men I've slept with were born.
Redhead: That's true.
Brunette: Hell, I'm lucky if I remember their last names.
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Weapons of Mass Digestion
Paranoid blonde: He's just so quiet and creepy. I really feel like he could kill someone!
Annoyed brunette: Because he's quiet and creepy?
Paranoid blonde: Well, he, like, steals forks from the dining hall and stuff!
University of Maryland, College Park
Maryland
Wish I Had Somebody Who Cared Enough to Abuse Me
Bimbette #1: ... So, after he called in to quit for me, I'm sure everyone was like, 'He must be one of those, like, abusive boyfriends who won't let her work!'
Bimbette #2: That'd be okay, though.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: an invisible fiend
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Gossip | Gripes | Minnesota | Overheard in Minneapolis | Relationships | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Paving the Way for Such Great Presidents As Martin Luther King and Ice T
Bimbette: Harriet Tubman? Of course I know who that was. She was America's first black president!
Shout-out: www.overeardinhighschool.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Marina
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | History | Overheard in High School | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If He Starts Doing Lipo, That's Marriage Material
30-ish blonde #1: So, what do you think of my date?
30-ish blonde #2: He seems nice... Plus, he's a plastic surgeon!
30-ish blonde #1: Hmmm... I don't really like him. Plus, he only does same day procedures. I'm only dating him for the free Botox.
30-ish blonde #2: I totally understand. I would only date him for free Botox, too.
Ladies' room, The Wilshire
Santa Monica, California
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | California | Jobs & Careers | Posted 2008-02-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When You Can Take the Handicapped Kid's Scissors Away, Grasshopper...
Bimbette: ... You, like, learn to flip people on the mat. My mom knows how to do that. She works with retarded kids and they, like, have come at her with scissors and tried to cut her throat before.
Barista: That doesn't sound like a job I'd want to have.
Bimbette: No, she loves it.
Starbucks
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Overheard by: I just want my mocha, please
Categories: Baristas | Bimbettes | Jobs & Careers | Maryland | Violence | Posted 2008-02-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Juxta Barely Got My GED, So Don't Ask Me
Rich girl #1: This one's 'the juxtapositioned couple'? What's juxtapositioned?
Rich girl #2: I don't know... Like, without their skin?
Phoenix, Arizona
I'll Tell You It's Yours, Regardless
Girl, after showing of Juno: I want a baby.
Boyfriend: [Raises eyebrows.]
Girl: Not by you, but, you know...
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Brand Recognition Is So Important
Girl: In case they forget our names, they're right here on our vaginas.
1280 Peachtree Street
Atlanta, Georgia
... To "Delaware"?
Proctor: What do you believe is the current state of our country?
Pageant contestant: Wisconsin. Wait... Can I change my answer?
Beauty pageant
Green Bay, Wisconsin
But I'd Only Be a Truckstop Ho for Mad Cash
Rich white chick: Fuck, yeah, I'd be a car ho for some sweet cash.
Christchurch, Canterbury
New Zealand
Categories: Bimbettes | Jobs & Careers | New Zealand | Whiteys | Posted 2008-01-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook