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Wait 'Til She Learns She Can't Go Down On Him.
Dumb blonde: Jesus is such a cockblock!
UCLA
California
Sarah Really Knows How to Push Her Own Buttons.
Self-centered bimbo to another: I love texting myself, but I told myself: "let me see if I can hold off doing that til Sunday, to see if I can live alone."
Mamaroneck, New York
Categories: Advice | Bimbettes | New York | Stupidity | Technology | Posted 2011-05-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So Many Rules, Though
Girl #1: Me and my boyfriend play this game called jeep, and it's when you see a jeep you say "jeep," and I will win.
Girl #2: That sounds like fun!
Birmingham, Alabama
Overheard by: No I will
...In Other Words, Pie
Blonde girl: I like summer fruits... Like strawberries.
Guy: What about others?
Blonde girl: Only if it's puree, or used in a sexual nature.
Masters' Room
University of Auckland
New Zealand
Categories: Bimbettes | Fruit | New Zealand | Sexuality | Toys | Posted 2010-11-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Mom Has All the Answers
Girl on phone: Hamster ovaries? Really? I did not know that.
College
Portland, Oregon
Categories: Animals | Bimbettes | Body parts | Oregon | Questions | Posted 2010-11-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Also Why She Doesn't Have to Give Blowjobs.
Confused attractive hipster: I don't understand why he became progressively more Asian during my dream.
Amused friend #1: You don't have to.
Amused friend #2: Because you're pretty.
Manhattan, New York
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | Compliments | New York | Race | Posted 2010-10-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...And You're Wearing It Now!
College girl #1: I have never taken my shirt off!
College girl #2: Wait, didn't you wear a see-through one before?
College girl #1: That was you, you whore!
UC Santa Cruz
California
Overheard by: Eric
And My Glitter Is Edible
Slutty chick to guy next to her: I'm not clever, but I'm sparkly!
New Orleans, Louisiana
Why Sex-Positive Feminism Exists.
Girl: I haven't been on a stage since grammar school. Having sex on a stage is so much better than quoting Susan B. Anthony.
Jersey City, New Jersey
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Education | New Jersey | Sex | Posted 2010-04-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Really Need to Start Tagging and Cataloging Them
Girl #1, after passing by awkward guy staring at her: Ummm, why did that guy we just passed stare at us?
Girl #2: Umm... Didn't you sleep with him last weekend?
Girl #3: Oooh... I thought he looked familiar!
James Madison University
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Dukeees for life
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Sex | Virginia | Weirdness | Posted 2010-04-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thank Goodness I Got the Rollover Slut Plan
College girl on cell: So, it's all good? Cause I'm just re-using the same guys over and over! My number doesn't go up!
Shout-out: feeds.feedburner.com
Overheard by: just eating my pizza
Categories: Bimbettes | On the phone | Overheard in Minneapolis | Questions | Sex | Posted 2010-03-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And If They're Really Yummy, It's "Mmm"
Asian bimbo #1, filling out apartment application: How do you spell "roommate"?
Asian bimbo #2 : Well... If it's just one person, it has one "m". It it's two or more, two "m's"
UC Riverside
California
Overheard by: Sophya
Categories: Asians | Bimbettes | California | Colleges & Universities | Questions | Stupidity | Words | Posted 2010-01-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Being the Midwest Corn Princess Is Not Without Its Benefits
Hot brunette to guy friend: I just really want to get it, you know, so I can fuck it in its ear.
Guy: Ugh, me too!
Liberty State Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: Julia
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | Friends | Guys | Kink | New Jersey | Wishes | Posted 2010-01-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Plus, I Learned to Use a Urinal
Barely legal drunk blonde: Oh my god, I just walked into the guys' washroom. There were guys at the urinals!
Barely legal drunk brunette: It's okay, you were just breaking down gender dichotomies.
Karaoke Bar
Canadia
Overheard by: Tiffany
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bimbettes | Canadia | Drunks | Gender issues | Pee | Sexuality | Posted 2009-12-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Wondered About the Beanie
Brunette: Are you getting him something for Christmas?
Blonde: Why would I?
Brunette: I don't know, I thought you were close!
Blonde: Christmas present? He's Jewish!
Brunette: Ohhhh.
Kent State University
Kent, Ohio
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Gifts | Ohio | Questions | Relationships | Religion | Posted 2009-12-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
On the Dollar Bill.
Bimbette, standing in front of George Washington's sarcophagus: Hold on! So, where is George Washington?
Mount Vernon, Virginia
Overheard by: Bemused
Um, Have You Seen It Pole Dance??
Giggly blonde teen: Ew, you know bestiality is illegal, right?
Giggly brunette teen: It wasn't bestiality!
Giggly blonde teen: And yet you know that your cat is good in bed?
Ontario
Canadia
Every Lovemaking Session Is Like One Of the Matrix Movies
Blonde: So if you don't swallow it, where does it go?
Brunette, exasperated: I don't know, I dodge it!
Dorm
Amherst, Massachusetts
Categories: BJs | Bimbettes | Cum | Massachusetts | Questions | Posted 2009-10-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Regret to Inform You That New Jersey Was Founded in 1664, Dear Reader
Bimbo #1, buying coffee: Do you ever, like, look at your change and think, "Wow: $16.64. Something totally happened that year!"
Bimbo #2: Oh yeah, I totally agree. Like, if I bought something for like two dollars with a $20 and my change was $19.78, I like might know someone who was born that year!
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: BaptistaBarista
I Think He Got the Gist When I Fucked Him and Then Stole His Wallet
Brunette: Was it you that was telling me you told prince charming that you were a whore?
Redhead: You mean Mark*, the rich guy? No, I just told him not to fall in love with me because I was a faithless whore and there was no man on earth worthy of my loyalty. You give a man loyalty and they walk all over you. Besides, I wouldn't describe him as prince charming. More like a toad with money.
Brunette: So you did tell him you were a whore?
Greek Restaurant
Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Feelings | Infidelity | Louisiana | Money | Questions | Restaurants | Posted 2009-08-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Puerto Ricans: "We've Never Seen This Girl Before in Our Lives."
Dude: Buenos Aires, eh?
Bimbette wearing Buenos Aires t-shirt: I gotta represent for my Puerto Ricans!
Summit Park Clubhouse
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: rock.star.
Now That Metal Rods Are the Latest Fashion Craze
Teacher: Okay, now what you do think is the chance of being killed by being struck by lightning?
Bimbette: Ummmm... probably like, one in two.
Class: (silence)
Teacher: One in two?
Bimbette: Wait! Make that one in ten.
Classroom
Sydney
Australia
Just Because Of the Short-Shorts and Rollerskates?
Curious brunette: Hey, is that casting agent friend of yours gay?
Exasperated brunette: No! That's the guy I sleep with sometimes. Why does everyone keep asking me that?
Rosepepper Cantina
Nashville, Tennessee
Overheard by: Amy Rose
Just a Bit Self-Conscious About His Baby-Carrot Penis
Blonde: So this guy was hitting on me and he was like, "so, do you have a boyfriend?" and I was like, "ummm, yeah." It was really creepy. I was like, "oh my god, I can not tell my boyfriend about this!" I mean, normally he wouldn't really care, but (looks around and lowers voice) this guy was black, so I think my boyfriend might flip. I mean, not that he's racist or anything.
Penn Tech
Williamsport, Pennsylvania
Categories: Bimbettes | Pennsylvania | Race | Relationships | Weirdness | Whiteys | Posted 2009-06-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Men Are More Like Women Than We Like to Think
American bimbo, standing in front of an Italian painting of a martyr bleeding from his leg: Uhh, why is he, like, bleeding from his penis?
The Louvre
Paris
France
Overheard by: American art student
They Were All Cured by Evangelicals
Bimbette, staring at Gay-Straight Alliance meeting sign: Oh my god, the gay thing was *so* five years ago.
Troy High School
Fullerton, California
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Default | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Stupidity | Time Management | Words | Posted 2008-10-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Who's Going As Pontius Pilate of Nottingham?
Bimbette, looking at halloween costumes online with her boyfriend: Oh, look! You can go as Robin Hood and I'll be Mary Magdalene!
RIC College
Providence, Rhode Island
Categories: Bimbettes | Books | Clothes | Colleges & Universities | Default | History | Rhode Island | Stupidity | Posted 2008-10-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
...But You Found a Scarf? Score!
Bimbette on phone, nonchalantly: So you lost your baby?
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Do You Suppose This White Porcelain Fixture Could Be Used for Urination?
Bimbette in bathroom stall: So what are these hooks for?
Friend: To like, hang your coat or bag or whatever.
Bimbette: Oh my god! I am so stupid! I've been putting my coat on the floor! How long have you known about this? (runs out of stall, yells to random girl) Did you know about the hooks?! (girl nods) I am so stupid!
Ottawa
Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: chloe
Except for the One Guy Who Said I Could Use a Cup
Bimbette shouting from crowd: Why does everyone want me to eat shit out of their mouths today?
Michigan Tech
Houghton, Michigan
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Default | Euphemisms | Michigan | Poop | Questions | Weirdness | Posted 2008-08-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Still Think It Would Be Sad If California Fell Into the Ocean?
Bimbette in line for concert: Wait, like, when is New Year's Eve? Is it the 30th or the 31st?
Boyfriend: It's the 30th. New Year's Day is the 31st.
Chain Reaction
Anaheim, California
Overheard by: oldest person at the show
I Only Go to the Cafeteria to Test Myself
Blonde girl entering the cafeteria: These lines are so long! Thank god I decided to be anorexic!
Mary Washington University
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Overheard by: waiting in line
Another Tragic Incidence of the Blonde Leading the Blonde
Ditz #1: ...and then I was like, "Why did I fail spring semester, sir?" and then he was like, "You asked me if The Odyssey was an actual event, and stated that it was in every one of your papers on the subject, even after I told you it wasn't."
Ditz #2: Wait, it wasn't?
Loyola University
Chicago, Illinois
If You Make a Pop Culture Reference, They Accuse You Of Being a Jew
Gucci girl to friends: God! I'm so tired of my Nazi book group! (silence) I mean, they don't want cookies, they don't want to socialize, it's just like, book book book you may not mention anything besides the book!
Glencoe, Illinois
Overheard by: I was worried for a minute
On Today's Episode Of Skanky and the Brain...
Girl #1: Yeah, Dave*'s cute. Not super-attractive, but I'd sleep with him.
Girl #2: I wouldn't.
Girl #1: Why not?
Girl #2: I made a pact with myself that I would never date him.
Girl #1: Yeah, but did you say you wouldn't sleep with him?
Girl #2: No, I guess not.
Girl #1: So there's, like, a loophole. You can sleep with him, just don't date him.
Girl #2: Yeah, I guess so. Cool.
Girl #1: God, I'm so smart.
Valencia Community College
Orlando, Florida
If You're Gonna Be Wrong, at Least Go Top-Shelf
Bimbette, pointing to Che Guevara t-shirt: Jose Cuervo!
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: SP
Those Were Different Times--There Was a War On
College girl #1: If I'm pregnant, the father is either him or his cousin.
College girl #2: Wait, you slept with David* and his cousin?
College girl #1: It wasn't a big deal, it was a threesome!
Barnes & Noble
Cary, North Carolina
Overheard by: Jennifer
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Family ties | Friends | North Carolina | Pregnancy | Sex | Sorority types | Stores | Weirdness | Posted 2008-06-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Everything She Knows About Homosexuality She Learned from Bravo TV
Bimbette: What's wrong with gay people? Gay people are funny.
Religion Class
El Paso, Texas
Categories: Bimbettes | Compliments | Default | Feelings | Questions | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Sexuality | Texas | Posted 2008-06-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
For Instance, If the State Wants to Mix Stripes and Plaids
Bimbette government teacher, explaining checks and balances: So then, like, the national government says to the state government, "Um, you can't do that, you little... like, state."
Canton, Michigan
Turns Out Hell Is Nicer Than Michigan
Bimbette on cell: I thought I'd died, and then gone to, like, not heaven.
University of Michigan
Ann Arbor, Michigan
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Death & dying | Default | Fears | Michigan | On the phone | Religion | Posted 2008-05-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Good Point --No Effect on Religious Beliefs
Professor: Now, if we did eliminate illness and achieved immortality there might be serious religious repercussions. Can anyone think of how this might affect religious beliefs?
Bimbette: Well, like, if Hitler were immortal, he would, like, go to jail for, like, a million years and then, like, chill out for eternity, you know?
Eternal Youth and Immortality Seminar
Lafayette College, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: knows that Hitler would still be dead because he SHOT himself
Categories: Bimbettes | Class | Compare and contrast | Crimes | Education | History | Pennsylvania | Philosophy | Questions | Religion | Stupidity | Teachers | Posted 2008-05-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Carlos Beltran: I Hate Being an Outfielder
Female Mets fan: I'd let the whole infield fuck me in the ass with no lube if it meant they would win the World Series.
Friend: Classy, Michelle, real classy.
Braves-Mets Game
Queens, New York
Overheard by: aaron
2008: Microsoft Pilots MS Office Assistant, "Buzzy the Dildo"
Guy: You know when you do a "Find File" in Windows? Yeah. I want to kill the little animated dog... It bothers me.
Girl: Hahaha... Yeah. It's better than the paperclip.
Guy: Meh... Only because he doesn't pop up unexpectedly. Clippy was kind of cool if he weren't in the way.
Girl: Thats what he wants you to think! He makes you feel bad for hating him!
Guy: Why this makes me want to have an animated kitten running around my desktop, I don't know. I used to have such a program.
Girl: I had a stripper on my laptop. She danced and stripped whenever music came on.
Guy: You're such a closet nympho.
Girl: Yeah. For my dreams class, we have to write all our dreams down and share them with the class. Last night I dreamt I was trekking through a jungle in gold prada heels to find my doctor to get an HIV test. I'm not sure I want the class psychoanalyzing that one.
Portland, Maine
Guy: Come Back! I Can Change It!
Girl #1: I can understand the idea behind having an affair...
Girl #2: Yeah, it's the change of scenery.
Girl #3: The change of dick...
East Lansing, Michigan
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Etiquette | Friends | Gender issues | Girls | Infidelity | Michigan | Penis | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As Soon As We Get On, I'm Grabbing a Pole and Ripping Them Off
Chick: Well, my mom wouldn't let me on the train until I wore pants, so there ya go.
Southmoor station
Aurora, Colorado
Categories: Bimbettes | Chicks | Clothes | Colorado | Family ties | Gender issues | Gripes | Public Transportation | Teens | Posted 2008-04-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And You're Hoochie-Skipper.
20-something in pink heels, on a Saturday afternoon: God, I'm like frickin walk of shame Barbie right now.
eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Eavesdrop DC | Fashion | Feelings | Toys | Posted 2008-04-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
At Least Take a Bite of This Apple
Boy: I believe in waiting until marriage.
Girl: That's funny, cause I believe in you fucking my brains out.
Bryn Mawr College
Pennsylvania
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | Colleges & Universities | Comebacks | Compare and contrast | Etiquette | Girls | Guys | Pennsylvania | Relationships | Religion | Religious fanatics | Sex | Students | Wishes | Yeahhh, college! | Posted 2008-04-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Have the Hairbrushes, Right?
Girl, wearing leather pants and high heels, pushing a cart containing D batteries, duct tape, and huge bag of rice, on cell: I don't know why he's so smug, I told him what I would do to him if I caught him again. [pause] Okay, well I've almost got everything I need, I'll be right over.
Wal-Mart
Lufkin, Texas
Overheard by: wtf?
Categories: Bimbettes | Girls | On the phone | Relationships | Shopping | Stores | Texas | Threats | Posted 2008-04-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Storytelling Is a Lost Art
Drunk bimbette: Oh my god! I used to like this ugly guy once... Then I realized he was ugly and stopped liking him.
Barbeque
Jundiaí
Brazil
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | Brazil | Compare and contrast | Drunks | Feelings | Restaurants | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
As I Have Noticed Your Lack of Training Wheels
Drunk girl in bar to bartender: You should be so lucky as to have sex with me.
Bartender: I wouldn't fuck you for practice.
Richmond, Virginia
Overheard by: warm ups?
As My Plaques and Trophies Will Attest
Dude carrying Subway sandwich: My ass? No, I wouldn't expect a girl to be looking at my ass.
Chick carrying Subway sandwich: Oh yeah. Women will look at your ass. But they can't check out the other thing.
Dude: Well, under certain circumstances . . .
Chick: No, there's nothing equivalent. There's no cleavage shot.
Dude: A girl slapped my ass at the gym the other day.
Chick: Oh yeah. That's right. I have slapped lots of asses.
Howard and New Montgomery
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: Cleavage Shots All Around!
Categories: Ass | Bimbettes | Chicks | Default | Euphemisms | Friends | Gender issues | Guys | Penis | San Francisco | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But Apparently That's Not How Job Interviews Work
Girl walking to bus stop drunk: I just wanted to walk in, get groped and leave.
Pheasant Run
Harrisonburg, Virginia
Overheard by: Brandon Call
And You Can Only Show the Video to a Limited Audience
Girl #1: At least he didn't say what JD said to me the other night. He said I was boring in the bedroom because I didn't try new things.
Girl #2: Oh my god!
Girl #1: Yeah and I told him, well how am I supposed to know what to do? I was a virgin before you. Well, not literally a virgin, but close enough!
Girl #2: So what are you going to do?
Girl #1: Well, I told him that when we go on vacation, we can have a threesome. But it has to be someone I'll never see again.
New Brunswick, New Jersey
Overheard by: Slutgers Girl
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Friends | Girls | Gripes | New Jersey | Offers and requests | Relationships | Sex | Sexuality | Posted 2008-04-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Pickings Seem to Be Slim in Iowa
College girl #1: So I met up with Jeremy last night.
College girl #2: Ah, the one with the small penis. Wait... No, Adam has the small dick. Jeremy's the bad kisser, right?
College girl #1: To be fair, they're both bad kissers. But yeah, Adam's the one with the small dick.
Coffee shop
Iowa City, Iowa
Categories: Bars & Clubs | Bimbettes | Chicks | Compare and contrast | Default | Friends | Gossip | Iowa | K-I-S-S-I-N-G | Penis | Sexuality | Students | Posted 2008-04-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Penis Doesn't Care What You Think
Blonde: ... And then there was, like, this penis all up in my face, and I was like, 'But I thought you were a girl...'
Montclair State University
New Jersey
Overheard by: Anna
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gender issues | New Jersey | Penis | Sexuality | Posted 2008-03-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Like Richard Simmons
Bimbette #1: Wait, is a bird a mammal? I don't think it's a mammal...
Bimbette #2: I think a bird is, like, its own species.
B train
Boston, Massachusetts
His G-String with the Elephant Head on It Was a Bit of a Shock, Though
Summer fun Barbie #1: I mean, like, I wasn't even surprised that you went home with him!
Summer fun Barbie #2: Do you mean that I had sex with him?
Summer fun Barbie #1: Yeah.
Summer fun Barbie #2: Yeah, me neither.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: also not surprised
Seriously, Curling Is the Most Retarded Sport Ever
Brunette #1, breaking silence: I hate brooms.
Brunette #2: Me, too.
Rest of group: ... What?!
Cactus Club, Yaletown
Vancouver, British Columbia
Canadia
Categories: Bimbettes | Canadia | Default | Gripes | Health & Hygiene | Posted 2008-03-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Couldn't We Just Discriminate Against People Wearing Explosive Clothing?
Bimbette: Well, discriminating against the Muslims is different than against, like, the Russians for Hitler and everything.
Archbishop Spalding High School
Severn, Maryland
Overheard by: Wait, is she kidding?
Categories: Bimbettes | Compare and contrast | Default | Geography | History | Maryland | Politics | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What's Next -- Shopping at Hot Topic?
Blonde to another: I can't believe you're not tanning today! You disgust me!
California Polytechnic University
Pomona, California
Overheard by: Quiet Student
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | California | Colleges & Universities | Default | Gripes | Posted 2008-03-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
How'd Professor Walsh Even Get My Number?
Blonde: So, he calls me drunk at two o'clock in the morning and tells me our relationship has barnacles.
Brunette: What?!
Blonde: He compared our relationship to ship that has barnacles on it!
Brunette: Um...
Blonde: So now I'm like, 'Should I read into this?'
Psych building, Washington University
St. Louis, Missouri
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Compare and contrast | Default | Missouri | Relationships | Students | Posted 2008-03-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What If Your Husband Finds Out?
Girl to pals in line for restroom: ... So now I'm dating my boss, my landlord, and financial advisor...
Friend: Wow, that's intense.
DeVos Performance Hall
Grand Rapids, Michigan
Overheard by: Caty
I Catalog Them by Penis Size and Strange Bodily Features
Redhead: You seriously don't know where Bruce Willis was born?
Brunette: No.
Redhead: I can tell you where half the actors I'm in love with were born.
Brunette: Honey, I can't even tell you where half the men I've slept with were born.
Redhead: That's true.
Brunette: Hell, I'm lucky if I remember their last names.
Fredericksburg, Virginia
Weapons of Mass Digestion
Paranoid blonde: He's just so quiet and creepy. I really feel like he could kill someone!
Annoyed brunette: Because he's quiet and creepy?
Paranoid blonde: Well, he, like, steals forks from the dining hall and stuff!
University of Maryland, College Park
Maryland
Wish I Had Somebody Who Cared Enough to Abuse Me
Bimbette #1: ... So, after he called in to quit for me, I'm sure everyone was like, 'He must be one of those, like, abusive boyfriends who won't let her work!'
Bimbette #2: That'd be okay, though.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: an invisible fiend
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | Gossip | Gripes | Minnesota | Overheard in Minneapolis | Relationships | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Paving the Way for Such Great Presidents As Martin Luther King and Ice T
Bimbette: Harriet Tubman? Of course I know who that was. She was America's first black president!
Shout-out: www.overeardinhighschool.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Marina
Categories: Bimbettes | Default | History | Overheard in High School | Stupidity | Posted 2008-03-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
If He Starts Doing Lipo, That's Marriage Material
30-ish blonde #1: So, what do you think of my date?
30-ish blonde #2: He seems nice... Plus, he's a plastic surgeon!
30-ish blonde #1: Hmmm... I don't really like him. Plus, he only does same day procedures. I'm only dating him for the free Botox.
30-ish blonde #2: I totally understand. I would only date him for free Botox, too.
Ladies' room, The Wilshire
Santa Monica, California
Categories: Beauty | Bimbettes | California | Jobs & Careers | Posted 2008-02-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When You Can Take the Handicapped Kid's Scissors Away, Grasshopper...
Bimbette: ... You, like, learn to flip people on the mat. My mom knows how to do that. She works with retarded kids and they, like, have come at her with scissors and tried to cut her throat before.
Barista: That doesn't sound like a job I'd want to have.
Bimbette: No, she loves it.
Starbucks
Gaithersburg, Maryland
Overheard by: I just want my mocha, please
Categories: Baristas | Bimbettes | Jobs & Careers | Maryland | Violence | Posted 2008-02-10 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Juxta Barely Got My GED, So Don't Ask Me
Rich girl #1: This one's 'the juxtapositioned couple'? What's juxtapositioned?
Rich girl #2: I don't know... Like, without their skin?
Phoenix, Arizona
I'll Tell You It's Yours, Regardless
Girl, after showing of Juno: I want a baby.
Boyfriend: [Raises eyebrows.]
Girl: Not by you, but, you know...
Toronto, Ontario
Canadia
Brand Recognition Is So Important
Girl: In case they forget our names, they're right here on our vaginas.
1280 Peachtree Street
Atlanta, Georgia
... To "Delaware"?
Proctor: What do you believe is the current state of our country?
Pageant contestant: Wisconsin. Wait... Can I change my answer?
Beauty pageant
Green Bay, Wisconsin
But I'd Only Be a Truckstop Ho for Mad Cash
Rich white chick: Fuck, yeah, I'd be a car ho for some sweet cash.
Christchurch, Canterbury
New Zealand
Categories: Bimbettes | Jobs & Careers | New Zealand | Whiteys | Posted 2008-01-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Someday She'll Be Allowed to Vote
Girl #1: Are those cows or people?
Girl #2: They're geese.
Illinois
Overheard by: Claire
Turkeys: Damn Right!
Brunette: Hold up -- I just want to grab some turkey.
Redhead: Why?
Brunette: ... So I can make a turkey sandwich?
Redhead: Yeah, I know, but we have chicken back home.
Brunette: Uh-huhhh -- and I want a turkey sandwich.
Redhead: It's the same thing.
Brunette: No. No, it's not.
Redhead: Alright, then what's the difference?
Brunette: ... One's a fucking turkey.
Long Island Super Market
Long Island, New York
I Would Love to Have My Groin Knighted, but I Guess It Only Happens to Cows
Lady to husband: Hey, they have steaks here, too. They just call them 'sirloins.'
Applebee's
Bowling Green, Kentucky
I've Devoted My Life to a Cinematographic Study of the Phenomenon
Bubbly girl: I am so happy now!
Bubbly friend, holding her hand: Me, too! I can't believe it!
Old man, stopping them in hallway: What are you two so happy about?
Bubbly girl: We just hit on each other!
Old man: So, are you girlfriends now?
Bubbly friend: Yes, we are!
Old man, after long pause: Two girls together... That is a wonderful thing.
Peninsula College
Pt. Angeles, Washington
Overheard by: Gidget
Categories: Bimbettes | Old folks | Relationships | Washington | Posted 2008-01-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Going Down or Coming Up?
Lady holding bottle of Chardonnay: Does this taste like a white wine?
New Albany, Indiana
Overheard by: liquor store counter jockey
If You Play the Bible Backwards, You Can Hear Them Talking
Bimbette: Of course dinosaurs and humans lived at the same time!
Bloomington, Indiana
Overheard by: Mike
Didn't Say I Wanted to Raise It
Teen girl: Oh! Cute baby! I want to have a baby!
Her annoyed mom: At what point did I make this look like fun to you?
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Kim
Categories: Bimbettes | Massachusetts | Moms | Parenting | Posted 2007-12-31 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Serves Her Right for Trying to Get Birth Control in Kansas
Girl: I just started a new birth control this week.
Dad: Which one were you on before?
Girl: Ummm... Levitra.
Overland Park, Kansas
'Cause I Can Only Think of Star Jones and Ringo Starr
Blonde student to astronomy professor: Can you tell me approximately how many stars there are in our solar system?
Wheaton College
Wheaton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: Amycakes
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Girls | Idiots | Massachusetts | Questions | Science | Students | Stupidity | Posted 2007-12-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And the Smell of Urine and Open Sores
Teen cheerleader: I think hobos are hot.
Friend: Why?
Teen cheerleader: I don't know. There's just something sexy about trains, I guess.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard in Minneapolis | Stupidity | Posted 2007-12-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Then You'll Be Deformed Enough to Settle for Him
Frustrated brunette: I just wish he would leave me alone! He's always following me!
Friend #1: I know. I'm sorry, sweetie.
Frustrated brunette: What can I do? Maybe I can change the way I look so he won't recognize me.
Friend #2, after long pause: You could cut off your legs!
Ithaca College
New York
Overheard by: LadyDisdain
That Wasn't Henry Winkler As the Head Ewok?
Girl watching end credits of Return of the Jedi: Where's Scott Baio?
Guy: What?
Girl: Scott Baio -- I don't see his name in the credits.
Guy: Scott Baio was not in Star Wars!
Girl: Yes, he was! He was celebrating at the end! The pilot!
Guy: Scott Baio is not Wedge Antilles!
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Overheard by:
Categories: About celebrities | Bimbettes | Eavesdrop DC | Movies | Posted 2007-12-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Now Can We Teach Kids about STDs in High School?
Tall brunette: ... And so I said I didn't want herpes, but he was like, 'Oh, they're no big deal.'
Short blonde: Well, did you sleep with him?
Tall brunette: Of course I did. Like he said, herpes are no big deal. Just a little itching and stuff... Besides, it's not like I can ever get them again. It's like chicken pox -- once you get it, you don't get it again.
Math major nearby, yelling: Do you mind taking your dumb, STD-having ass somewhere I'm not trying to eat?! [Other students cheer.]
Bentley Dining Hall, Lock Haven University
Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alexander Lepro
Categories: Bimbettes | Pennsylvania | STDs | Students | Stupidity | Posted 2007-12-15 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They Were Praying.
Bimbette #1: Why would anyone even be outside that late? What the hell were they doing?
Bimbette #2: Uh, Erica, we were outside, too.
Bimbette #1: Well, we had an excuse! We were streaking!
Park City, Utah
How God Was Feeling When He Got to the Tyrannosaurus Rex
Girl #1: I'm not a vest person.
Girl #2: You don't think I look good in this vest?
Girl #1: No, you look good, but I just don't get them. I mean, it's my arms that are cold!
Girl #2: Whatever. I'm over arms.
Madison, Wisconsin
Categories: Bimbettes | Body parts | Wisconsin | Posted 2007-12-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Then She Tried to Light Me on Fire
Bimbette #1: Is Norwegian to Swedish like English to Spanish?
Bimbette #2: No, it's like... Like... It's like Spanish to Italian.
Bimbette #1: Ohhh. Wait, isn't Italian a dead language?
Bimbette #2: Ummm, I think that's Latin.
Bimbette #1: Ohhh. You know, my Spanish teacher once told me I was like the scarecrow in The Wizard of Oz.
Berkeley, California
Overheard by: Denim on Denim
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Language barrier | Posted 2007-12-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Just a Large-Mouthed Bass with the Ability to Keep a Tune
Teen girl #1: Steven Tyler is definitely in the Rolling Stones.
Teen girl #2: Girrrl, you crazy! Wasn't he in the Backstreet Boys?
Teen girl #1, after long pause: I don't even think there is anyone named Steven Tyler.
Boston, Massachusetts
Overheard by: steven tyler is definitely the frontman for AEROSMITH.
Categories: About celebrities | Bimbettes | Massachusetts | Posted 2007-12-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
... Or Saw Me?
College girl to her family: ... And this is where I peed last night!
Security guard: [Applauds.]
College girl: You think he heard me?
French Quarter
New Orleans, Louisiana
Overheard by: Security Guard
No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
Girl #1: So, this guy, like, offers to take her up to his room, and I was like, 'Um, don't think so!'
Girl #2: Oh my god, totally! Yeah!
Girl #1: So I, like, carried her up to my room.
Girl #2: Did you know her at all?
Girl #1: No! But she was pretty drunk, so I, like, made sure she was, like, comfortable or whatever. Then I went down the hall to go to the bathroom, and I come back and she, like, threw up. Like, everywhere.
Girl #2: Was she still there?
Girl #1: No, she was gone! But it smelled really bad.
Girl #2: Ewww! That's so gross.
Villanova University
Villanova, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Bored In Class
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | Pennsylvania | Posted 2007-11-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or Just Use Them to Lash Insolent Tourists?
Bimbette tourist: Oh, right, yeah -- I need to find some belts. Do Chinese people wear belts?
Hong Kong, China
Overheard by: Kim
See, This Is Why I Went into Teaching
Witty history teacher: So, kids, not only does the money look minty and refreshing, it tastes good, too!
Teen girl: Oh my god, really?!
US Mint
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Categories: Bimbettes | Lies | Pennsylvania | Teachers | Posted 2007-11-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That Rule Is Just for Ugly People, Right?
RA: Does anyone else have a question?
Freshman girl: Yeah, can we park overnight in the parking garage that has the 'No overnight parking' sign in front of it?
University of Central Florida
Florida
Overheard by: Christa
When Only "What's Wrong with You?" Will Do
Spanish chick: Hey, you were in Auschwitz?
English guy: Yeah.
Spanish chick: Was it any fun?
English guy: Uhhh, I wouldn't say that.
Spanish chick: Yeah, I know, I know... But was it cool?
English guy: Well... Hmmm...
Poland
I Don't Think They Know That
College girl: I'm taking this online Arabic course... Did you know their alphabet is just all, like, smiley faces?
Providence, Rhode Island
Categories: Bimbettes | Language barrier | Rhode Island | Posted 2007-11-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Okay. Now Pretend You Think We Think That.
Blonde to parents: Pretend I'm smarter than you think I am.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: she really is
Categories: Advice | Bimbettes | Overheard in Minneapolis | Posted 2007-11-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
But It's British -- They Have No Future
Middle-aged woman: No, I haven't read Harry Potter. I'm not really into all that futuristic stuff.
Saratoga Springs, New York
Categories: Bimbettes | New York | Pop culture | Posted 2007-11-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
When You Can Drink the Hot Dog Water, Grasshopper...
Intellectual girl: Ugh, water and chocolate do not mix.
Bimbette hipster: Yeah, and neither do hot dogs!
Danville Area Community College
Danville, Illinois
Overheard by: Can't hear this anywhere else but Danville
But I Can't Stop Doing It
WASP lady: I bought this ring here and it really smells. Every time I put my hand up to my face it makes me want to vomit.
Jewelry shop
Alexandria, Virginia
Categories: Bimbettes | Health & Hygiene | Virginia | Posted 2007-11-12 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And My Kidneys Start Back Up
Princess #1: Oh my god, I have that top in, like, three colors.
Princess #2: Yeah, me, too.
Princess #1: You wanna get some lunch or something?
Princess #2: I can't. When I eat I get bloated.
Broadway Shopping Centre
Sydney
Australia
Overheard by: Ms Dash
Categories: Australia | Bimbettes | Diet & weight | Posted 2007-11-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
"... And I Think My Back Is Broken"
Freshman girl: I guess I always thought the perfect man would just fall from the sky and say, 'Hi, I'm your husband!'
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: the jankster
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at Cornell | Philosophy | Posted 2007-11-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Where Were You at Ten O'Clock Last Night?
Philosophy professor: After all, is it okay to go pee out in the open in a public place like a park?
Girl: Wait, well... Like, when?
Boston College
Massachusetts
Categories: Bimbettes | Massachusetts | Pee | Teachers | Posted 2007-11-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Beautiful Have a Wider Range of Things to Go Wrong, Though
Bimbette #1: You know what must suck?
Bimbette #2: What?
Bimbette #1: It must suck to be ugly. Because then, on top of everything else that's going wrong in your life, you're, like, ugly.
Bimbette #2: Yeah...
Buddhism class
Virginia
Overheard by: Mindygotback
I Was Almost Sorry When He Got Expelled and Hanged Himself
Girl #1: Stalkers are the best because they make you feel kind of loved.
Girl #2: I've never had a stalker!
Girl #1: Oh, God! You've never had a stalker?
Girl #2: Well, not really.
Girl #1: Stalkers are really the best. Like Kyle -- he was the really creepy kind, because he actually touched my butt in the dining hall, and it was gross.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: rvl
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | Overheard at Cornell | Posted 2007-10-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Have Liposuction on the Delivery Table
Bimbette on cell: Oh, okay, so she can't gain any more weight. That should be easy -- she's only at the beginning of the pregnancy. She just has to stop eating.
Princeton University
Princeton, New Jersey
Categories: Bimbettes | Diet & weight | New Jersey | Posted 2007-10-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
To Understand, I Will Require Visual Aids
Blonde: I wish we got graded on our bras. I would get an A. Get it?
www.overheardincomo.blogspot.com
Overheard by: Kelsey
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard in Columbia | Rack | Posted 2007-10-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Wouldn't Say I Missed 'Em, Bob
Bimbette: Oh my god! I just realized that I missed all of my classes today!
Shout-out: overheardatlc.blogspot.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Bimbettes | Education | Overheard at Loyola | Posted 2007-10-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Want Me to Check?
Woman: Don't I strike you as blonde?
Shout-out: overheardinpdx.blogspot.com
Overheard by: rich
Categories: Bimbettes | Hair | Overheard in PDX | Posted 2007-10-26 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Goldilocks Has Trouble Adapting to the World Outside the Forest
Chick: Can I have a hot chocolate, please?
Cafe worker: What size?
Chick: Hot.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: anonymous
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at Cornell | Stupidity | Posted 2007-10-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
In This Issue, "Seven Secrets to Make Him Give You Tax Money!"
Bimbette: She went to beauty school, so she thinks she's a cosmopolitician or something.
Shout-out: eavesdropdc.blogspot.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Bimbettes | Eavesdrop DC | Words | Posted 2007-10-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Thinks Our President Is Curious George
Blonde: You know, it's like the story of Ferdinand!
Brunette: How does my relationship have anything to do with Ferdinand, the king of Spain?!
Blonde: No! Ferdinand the bull! The classic children's book! What kind of best friend are you? You know I wouldn't know anything about the king of Spain!
Charlotte, North Carolina
Categories: Bimbettes | Names | North Carolina | Stupidity | Posted 2007-10-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
So I Just Bought All Those Staples for Nothing?
Bimbette: Sex makes everything so complicated. Seriously, I'm going back to being a virgin.
Friend: Honey, you're never going to be a virgin again. It's impossible.
Bimbette: What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!
Tucson, Arizona
Categories: Arizona | Bimbettes | Philosophy | Posted 2007-10-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Like Bibbidi-Bobbidi-Boob!
College girl: My bra -- it's, like, magical! It mysteriously unclips itself throughout the day!
Fairfield University
Fairfield, Connecticut
Overheard by: GladMyBraIsntMagical..
Categories: Bimbettes | Clothing | Connecticut | Magic | Posted 2007-10-17 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Or at Least Receive Fewer Lashings?
Bimbette: But if we buy more Nike stuff, won't the kids making it get more money?
High school
Halifax, Nova Scotia
Canadia
Kill Mom, Dad's Mad/ Fuck Dad, Mom's Sad
Bimbette #1: So, like, he was talking about how, like -- I don't remember what it's called, but like, the girl knows her parents do stuff that, like, she can't do, like sex, so she, like, hates her mom, because she wants her dad like that, and like, she wants to kill her mom, but she knows that if she does, then, like, her dad will be mad at her, so she doesn't do it, so she tries to be like her mom, because, like, her dad likes her mom.
Bimbette #2: I don't get it.
Ladies' room, UC Merced
Merced, California
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Stupidity | Posted 2007-10-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What the Fuck?
Girl #1: Dude, I think I'm in a relationship...
Girl #2: What the fuck?
Girl #1: I'll explain later.
Girl #2: I think there's still half a burrito in the fridge.
Long Beach, California
Overheard by: sara nicole
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Gossip | Posted 2007-10-01 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Hope I'm Filled with Marshmallow
16-year-old girl: Organs are icky. I hope I don't have any.
Biology class, Carmel College
Brisbane
Australia
Categories: Australia | Bimbettes | Body parts | Posted 2007-09-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, There's No One There
Girl, pointing: That kid -- he's my new friend.
Friend: What? That tiny kid?
Girl: Yeah. You said I need a new friend. That kid is my new friend.
Friend: Whatever.
Girl: I think his name is Kyle.
Cosmo Park
Columbia, Missouri
Overheard by: Kelsey
Categories: Bimbettes | Missouri | Names | Relationships | Posted 2007-09-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And a Fascist Participates in "Facials"?
Wadsworth character in the movie Clue: You see, my secret is that my wife was a socialist.
Girl watching the film: So, does that mean that she was a prostitute or something?
French class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia
Out of the Frying Pan, into the Fire
Bimbette #1: Remember when you thought Mexico was just a state that you couldn't go to?
Bimbette #2: Yeah. I didn't know it was actually a different continent.
Oceanside, California
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Stupidity | Posted 2007-09-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Mean a Trannyserver?
College girl: We should have asked for one of those male waitresses.
Katz's restaurant
Austin, Texas
Overheard by: queenofsarab
I Remember When Wellesley Was a Good School
Girl in lunch line: Why are there fucking bamboo shoots in this stir fry? What do they think I am, a koala?!
Wellesley College
Wellesley, Massachusetts
Categories: Bimbettes | Food | Gripes | Massachusetts | Posted 2007-09-19 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Spelled "Shove On"
Blonde: Ohhh my god! How adorable is he! [Her two friends agree, cooing.]
Baby daddy holding infant: Thank you, girls.
Blonde: Can I hold him?
Baby daddy: Yeah, sure... Here you go.
Blonde: Awww, I love him! What's his name?
Baby daddy: Uhhh... Shit, I know this... Shavon? Shavawn?
Blonde: You don't even know your son's name?!
Baby daddy: Shoot, I did earlier. Shavon! Yeah... That's it. Damn, and I helped name this one, too.
Temple University
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: hot child in the city
Categories: Bimbettes | Black people | Dads | Names | Pennsylvania | Posted 2007-09-14 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
What Do You Think Scrapple Is?
Slutty girl: Hey, you know cow titties?
Quiet girl: Uhhh...
Slutty girl: Can you eat them?
Quiet girl: What?
Slutty girl: You know -- cow titties!
Quiet girl: You mean udders?
Slutty girl: Yeah! Can you eat them?
French class, All Saints High School
Whitby, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: freshman whisperer
I Wish You Were Fat, Too
Bimbette #1: I wish I was fat.
Bimbette #2: I totally know what you mean.
Dallas, Texas
Categories: Bimbettes | Diet & weight | Texas | Posted 2007-09-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Never Know What the Hell I'm Upset About
Teenybopper #1: Oooh, look at the nail polish I just got!
Teenybopper #2: I never use Sally Hansen nail polish anymore, because they test on animals.
Teenybopper #1: Really? What does that even mean?
Teenybopper #2: I don't know. Something about pigs, I think...
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: EL
Um... During?
Hot girl: I haven't had sex in so long.
Cute friend, nodding: Mmmm.
Hot girl: Nobody pays attention to me...
Cute friend: It's 'cause you only have boyfriends.
Hot girl: Yeah... And... [Whispers] I kinda like pooping.
Tampa, Florida
Categories: Bimbettes | Florida | Gender issues | Kink | Poop | Sex | Time Management | Posted 2007-09-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
A Small Price to Pay for Getting Head from Slimer
Girl changing after gym: Oh my god! My underwear's, like, glowing inside my pants!
Lockport Township High School
Lockport, Illinois
And They're Both Spelled with Letters!
Chick: Oklahoma and Ohio -- I always get those two mixed up.
Dude: Yeah.
Chick: Wait, which one is in the middle of the country?
Dude: Uh, they both are, kind of.
Chick: Oh, well, which one is a state?
Dude: Both.
Chick: Yeah, that's why I get them mixed up!
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: taranto
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at Cornell | Stupidity | Posted 2007-09-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, a Baby.
Chick: I've always wanted one of those! ... What is it?
Great Glebe Garage Sale
Ottawa, Ontario
Canadia
Overheard by: grasshopper
Some Are Born to Greatness; Others Have It Thrust into Them
Bimbette #1: Chris* has the biggest dick ever. I mean, how does someone's dick get to be that big?!
Bimbette #2: Yeah, I wonder how that's determined. Like, what side of the family?
Bimbette #1: Yeah, I don't think I want to have boys and have to deal with stuff like that... [Trails off as guy in front of them turns his head and then keeps walking. Both girls stop dead in their tracks.]
Bimbette #2: Oh my god, that's him.
University of Texas
Austin, Texas
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Penis | Texas | Posted 2007-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
My What Now?
Bimbette #1: Let me turn on the flash -- it's dark in here.
Bimbette #2, after picture: Oh my god, that was so bright! That was like when the cop shined the flashlight in my eyes at my DUI.
Bimbette #3: Could he see your brain?
Movie theater
Ridgefield Park, New Jersey
Overheard by: Big J
Categories: Bimbettes | New Jersey | Questions | Posted 2007-08-30 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Then Kill Them All, Execution Style!
Girl: I love this new toothpaste I got. It has green tea in it and tastes absolutely fantastic. It feels like there's a tea party going on in my mouth, and I just want to invite my teddy bears or something!
Melbourne, Florida
Overheard by: Ali and Livi
Do Your Best and I'll Laugh at You
Bimbette, inquiring about exam during review: Yeah, but, like -- what if you, like, can't think that hard?
Ohio University
Athens, Ohio
Generally, Yes.
20-ish girl: Wait... Is it the Specific Ocean or the Pacific Ocean?
Sarasota, Florida
Would You Care for a Valium?
Obsessive girl: Who do you think would win between a pig and a bat? I think a bat would win!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at McGill | Stupidity | Posted 2007-08-23 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
You Know, with the Caverns
Teacher: Alright, how many of you have been to a national park?
Student #1: I've been to Yellowstone.
Teacher: Okay, good. Anyone else?
Bimbette: Oh, I've been to Central Park.
Student #2: That isn't near anything that has any geographical importance.
Bimbette: Yeah, it does. It's in Pennsylvania. Duh.
Oklahoma
Overheard by: lauren.
But It's a Miracle Diet
Chick: I was just in the bathroom trying to throw up, and I just can't do it! I just gag. A penis can make me throw up, but my own two fingers cant... I hate giving blowjobs.
Montclair State University
Montclair, New Jersey
Overheard by: BTON
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Gripes | Hands | Health & Hygiene | New Jersey | Penis | Posted 2007-08-22 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Also, Dead Horses
Girl #1: Ewww, that tastes like glue! I mean, I imagine if I knew what glue tasted like, it would taste like that.
Girl #2: You know what tastes like glue? Rice noodles.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: scott
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at Cornell | Stupidity | Posted 2007-08-21 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Inhale, and Then Ask Me Again
Bimbette #1: This is in good shape considering it was under six feet of water.
Bimbette #2: It's not still underwater, is it?
New Orleans, Louisiana
I Knew I Should Have Signed Up for Praying Mantis Kung Fu!
Sorostitute #1: You can't fail gym!
Sorostitute #2: Um, yes you can. I have a 'U' on my transcript in Swedish massage and yoga.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: rv
Categories: Bimbettes | Education | Overheard at Cornell | Posted 2007-08-20 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Except That Living in Italy Could Be a Good Thing
Frat guy: You ever been to the Franklin Mills Mall?
Bimbette: No! I live in King of Prussia! If I left King of Prussia to go to any other mall, it'd be like leaving Italy to eat at an Olive Garden. No!
Shout-out: overheardinphilly.blogspot.com
Overheard by: impressed, she has a point
Categories: Bimbettes | Frat boy types | Gripes | Overheard in Philly | Posted 2007-08-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Too Bad, He Was Such a Great Guy
Jock: Wait... Are you talking about Kim? I thought she was dating that guy.
Bimbette: Oh, you mean Fuck-face?
Jock: Yeah.
Bimbette: No, that's over.
Auburn University
Auburn, Alabama
I'm Going to Do Some Interval Training with My Retinas
Blonde tanning at pool: Someone set the alarm for five minutes -- I'm gonna stare at the sun.
Columbia, Missouri
Categories: Bimbettes | Missouri | Time Management | Posted 2007-08-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Um, What Sort of Visitors Have You Entertained?
Bimbette: I don't know... I just feel something swimming around inside of me!
Shout-out: overheardatlc.blogspot.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | Overheard at Loyola | Posted 2007-08-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Shiny, Though
Girl #1: That Zodiac movie looks pretty good...
Girl #2: Of course! It has Jake Gyllenhaal in it. Everything he touches turns to gold.
Girl #1: Oh, I know!
Girl #2: Mmm, I'd like him to touch me.
Girl #1: But it would be so uncomfortable to be all gold down there.
Girl #2: [Silence.]
Girl #1: What?
Girl #2: God, you're stupid
Shout-out: community.livejournal.com
Categories: About celebrities | Bimbettes | Overheard at York | Posted 2007-08-09 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Isn't This a Knock-Knock Joke?
Chick #1, when friend drops her orange: I hope that's bruised now.
Chick #2: Bananas don't bruise!
Chick #1: ... That's an orange!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Fruit | Overheard at McGill | Posted 2007-08-08 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Jerks Insist I Don't Give 'em Enough Change
Clerk: Ninety-five percent of all guys are jerks; the other 10 percent are okay.
Dunkin' Donuts
Newark, New Jersey
Overheard by: Chris
Categories: Bimbettes | Gripes | New Jersey | Posted 2007-08-06 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Everybody Knows God's White and Has No Rhythm
Girl #1: Is that hail?
Girl #2, looking out window: No, it's just some guys stepping.
Girl #1: Oh. I was wondering why the hail had a beat.
Mississippi University for Women
Columbus, Mississippi
Categories: Bimbettes | Mississippi | Weather | Posted 2007-07-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Black People: Yeah, We're Fine with That
Stressed undergrad: Yeah, I have to write a 25 page paper on my experiences with racial ideology.
Bimbette: Oh my god, I would just write a list of every time I talked to a black person... But I would never be able to get 25 pages.
overheardatnu.blogspot.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at Northwestern | Race | Students | Posted 2007-07-27 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And before Subtitles
Blonde #1: Did you see Marie Antoinette?
Blonde #2: Yeah.
Blonde #1: I don't get why they're all speaking English if they're in France.
Blonde #2: I think that was before they invented French.
Blockbuster
Orlando, Florida
But She Spent It, So Can We Move On?
Drunken bimbette: First of all, Francesca feels really bad about taking my dad's money when he was in a coma...
Sinbad's
San Francisco, California
Overheard by: another margarita, please!
Categories: Bimbettes | California | Drunks | Gossip | Posted 2007-07-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I'm Flightless, They Say -- Why Go On?
Bimbette #1: What's up with Katie?
Bimbette #2: She's an emu. Emus cut themselves.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | Overheard in Minneapolis | Stupidity | Words | Posted 2007-07-16 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
That's Not William Hung?
Bimbette, as Dalai Lama approaches podium: He's supposed to be the reincarnation of, like, God or whatever.
Smith College
Northampton, Massachusetts
Overheard by: velvin
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Massachusetts | Stupidity | Posted 2007-07-13 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Hiding a Core of Transcendent Ignorance
Blonde: I'm only dumb on the outside!
Upper Hutt
New Zealand
Overheard by: Sarah
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | New Zealand | Posted 2007-07-07 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And the Nobel Peace Prize for 2007 Goes To...
Bimbette: How are the African kids starving? Why don't they just... eat more?
Anchorage, Alaska
Isn't He a Character on Heroes?
Teen girl: Oh, I always thought Hiroshima was a person.
Criminalise War Conference
Kuala Lumpur
Malaysia
We Were Transported There in a Stagecoach with No Windows
Chick: You live on a farm? In New Hampshire?! I went to New Hampshire and I didn't think they had, like, farms!
Dude: Where did you go in New Hampshire?
Chick: PETCO.
Boston, Massachusetts
Categories: Bimbettes | Massachusetts | Stupidity | Posted 2007-07-04 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
It's Important to Rule That Out First
Blonde: So, what's this play about?
Brunnette: It's the adult version of Peter Pan.
Blonde: You mean, like, porn?
Brunette: Uhhh, not exactly.
Showing of Peter and Wendy, Kreeger Theater
Washington, DC
Overheard by: Julius
Categories: Bimbettes | Questions | Washington, DC | Posted 2007-07-03 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
The Secession of New York Is Just Wishful Thinking
Confused chick: Excuse me, sir, I don't know which line to go into... This says 'resident,' but I'm not from here -- I'm from New York.
Homeland Security agent: It's still this line.
O'Hare Airport immigration line
Chicago, Illinois
Overheard by: amused traveller
Couldn't I Do That without Getting Married?
Chick to friend: You should marry a fish! Then you can have sex and have mermaid babies!
High school
Marietta, Georgia
Overheard by: me
Huggy Bear: My Pimp Sense Is Tingling!
Liberated woman: I don't know what I'll do until I get married... I'm just so not into, like, doing taxes and stuff.
Shout-out: overheardatcornell.blogspot.com
Overheard by: disillusioned
Categories: Bimbettes | Gripes | Overheard at Cornell | Posted 2007-06-18 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
For the Last Time, That Was CPR
Bimbette #1: We need to find men to buy us drinks tonight -- I only have, like, 10 bucks.
Bimbette #2: Why don't you make out with Mom again? That worked last time.
Rehoboth Beach, Delaware
Categories: Advice | Bimbettes | Delaware | Family ties | Posted 2007-06-11 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
I Expect All My Misapprehensions to Be Validated
Smart girl: Obviously 'irregardless' is the wrong word in the sentence.
Dumb girl: Why is that word wrong?
Smart girl: For starters, it's not even a real word.
Dumb girl: Sure it is -- I use it all the time.
Erie Community College
Orchard Park, New York
Overheard by: Smarty Pants
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | New York | Stupidity | Words | Posted 2007-06-05 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Nobody Expects the Chinese Inquisition
Bimbette #1: I think I did okay on the test, but I didn't get any of the locations.
Bimbette #2: Yeah, they were hard to study for.
Bimbette #1: Yeah, like, I put them all in Asia, and I thought maybe something was wrong. I mean... Madrid sounds Chinese, doesn't it?
University of Louisville
Louisville, Kentucky
Categories: Bimbettes | Colleges & Universities | Education | Kentucky | Stupidity | Posted 2007-06-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Actually, Just a Regular One with a Small Bun
Hungry girl: Oooh, what's the jumbo hot dog?
Clerk: Ummm, it's a really big hot dog.
Milwaukee Admirals game, Bradley Center
Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Overheard by: Travis
And No, I Don't Think "Frenulum" Is a Pretty Name
Bimbette: Wait! So she had the baby via circumcision?!
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Overheard by:
Categories: Bimbettes | Gossip | Overheard at McGill | Words | Posted 2007-05-29 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
They'd Be Having Awkward One-Nighters All Over the World
Blonde: What if the Nazis got Facebook?
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at McGill | Questions | Posted 2007-05-25 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
Too Drunk to Hit On? Or Just Drunk Enough?
Woman: I don't keep any money in my billfold. You know, in case I lose it. So, what's your favorite Bible verse?
Macaroni Grill
Lawrenceville, Georgia
Overheard by: onethingleadstoanother
I Owe Dale $800, and He's Out for Blood
A girl screams and begins running away.
Friend: It's a chipmunk, you dumbass!
Girl, resuming original path: Oh.
Hubbard Lane
East Lansing, Michigan
Overheard by: Jigga Mouse
Senility Jane Goes to College
Girl #1, studying: I don't want to do this anymore! In five years I'm going to be dead and I won't care.
Girl #2: You won't be dead in five years.
Girl #1: Well, I'm going to be really old and I'm not going to care anymore.
Girl #2: You're not going to be old and you will care.
Girl #1: Wait... What? Care about what?
SUNY Cortland
Cortland, New York
Overheard by: Stephanie
Then Do Drugs and Cry
Girl #1: ... And my boyfriend told me what a bad person I was, and I was like, 'Don't say that to me! You're hurting my feelings!' Then I did drugs and cried all day.
Girl #2: Wow. Well, we should really study today...
Girl #1: Yeah, let's stay really late. Like, 'til 10.
Girl #2, totally serious: Yeah... Or we can go to the Biosphere and get burgers...
Girl #1, also serious: Yeah.
Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard at McGill | Time Management | Posted 2007-05-02 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And Odds Are They'll Both Reproduce
Bimbette #1: Hey, ummm, how do I get my files out of the computer?
Bimbette #2: Wait... The computers are also filing cabinets?! No, wait -- I don't think they are...
Bimbette #1: But isn't that where we get the papers?
Bimbette #2: What?
Bimbette #1: What?
Honesdale High School
Honesdale, Pennsylvania
Overheard by: Alex Lepro
Categories: Bimbettes | Pennsylvania | School [Elem., Middle, & High] | Technology | Posted 2007-04-28 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
We Are the Hollow Women, We Are the Stuffed Women
Bimbette #1: Can you get pregnant from giving head?
Bimbette #2: No, dumbass! Your saliva kills it before it gets to your uterus.
Shout-out: www.overheardinminneapolis.com
Overheard by: I wish I were joe mauer so I could get girls like this
Categories: Bimbettes | Overheard in Minneapolis | Stupidity | Posted 2007-04-24 | Email | Quote | Link | Del.icio.us | Facebook
And a Great White
Bimbette #1: Ewww, you did Brandon? Why? He's so ugly!
Bimbette #2: He had a pet shark...
Climbing gym
Virginia
I Guess You Could, Like, Help Stop the Burning
Bimbette #1: I would love to be a fireman! You work, like, three days a week, and when you're there you can just, like, sit and watch the news until the fire alarm goes off!
Bimbette #2: Yeah, but you'd have to watch people's houses burn down.
Bimbette #1: Yeah... That'd be, like, really depressing.
Minneapolis, Minnesota