That's Why I Hired a Poo-Catcher.

Female cashier on cell while ringing up items: Of course I wash my hands after I go to the bathroom! [Long pause, then smirks flirtatiously.] Ew, Jonathon! [Lowers voice] I don't do that to myself -- especially not into my hands...

Staples
Long Island, New York

Overheard by: very amused