So Anyway, He Killed Himself to Spite Me

Girl #1: Oh my god, so remember how Ben stopped talking to me and I was pissed but now I'm totally over it and whatever? Well, it turns out that what I didn't know was that his mother was dying and he was held up at knife point for like 20 minutes and was going through post-traumatic stress... And then I went home for reading week and didn't call him because I thought he wasn't talking to me, and that was apparently, like, the straw that broke the camel's back -- like, he really needed me and I wasn't there for him or something.
Girl #2: Wow. It's like, 'Thanks for making me feel like a total bitch.'
Girl #1: I know!

Shout-out: www.overheardatmcgill.com